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IT IS THE MOST RAPTUROUS OF DAYS

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Posts

  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Happy birthday, Tube.

    Darth Waiter on
  • BobCescaBobCesca Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Happy Birthday for yesterday, Tube.

    Hope you had fun celebrations and shenanigans.

    BobCesca on
  • Blake TBlake T Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    I was imagining that it was his birthday.

    I mean you'd go into town with your friends.

    Toasts get made, jokes flow quickly, money didn't flow as fast but it was spent wisely on cheap drinks and other fun and everything was flowing easily and for low prices. Then you meet her in line, she was pretty and you were confident. You ended up buying her a drink, it was way too expsensive but you don't care, you were checking out her arse.

    You go back with her to her friends and a couple of yours follow to back you up. You ask her questions she reciprocates, your friends, knowing how this work boldly proclaim you as an artist and you laugh it off. They continue pushing it, telling her about your projects and talking you up. The X-factor is never mentioned, the beetles were. Eventually after more drinks and a small amount of somewhat awkward dancing you two slip out of the bar and walk through a quiet park on the way to find a taxi.

    It's the temperature change that does it. It's so cold you have your arm around her while she holds her shoes that she overworked on the dancefloor. It makes you realise with absolute startling clarity how much you had to drink. You can't talk anymore you don't want to. You know any words at this stage will the drawn out longer than a state sanctioned execution. You communicate entirely by smiles now coupled with giving her a firm squeeze around her shoulders signalling your intentions.

    It's during one of those squeezes when it starts to move. A slow general push that you know is rapidly going to become something far more serious. You consider you options, and in your condition you can only come up with three. A bin, it's too far away though, the only way you can get there in such a short time is a sprint, and in your condition there is just as much chance you will end on the grass with your vomit getting all over your clothes. You next option is her bag, it's close, it's large and it's close. Your hand starts to move for it until it suddenly stops again. You're broke, you have spent every cent you have buying drinks with ridiculous names with all manner of fruit in them. In there you know there is a twenty. You need that to get home. That bag is important. You go with the only option that seems to make sense at the time.

    You eventually look up, your hands now warm with the overflow. You realise you are alone, have no idea where your friends are, have no money to get home and are holding a pretty lady's shoe full of vomit.

    Blake T on
  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    So Rane says you got blown by Hellboy, Tube.

    Falx on
  • ButlerButler 89 episodes or bust Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    oy.

    You woke up in a mosque again, didn't you?

    I'm going to have to go on my hands and fucking knees to the fucking embassy again, aren't I?

    Goddammit Tubeston if you weren't one of my best agents I'd have you shining boots in Uzbekistan so fast your head would stop spinning.

    Butler on
    Gvzbgul wrote: »
    A new born baby's skin is still porous, you can just leave them sitting in a bucket of blood and they'll soak up what they need.
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2010
    Tube went on a bender last night and accidentally started world war III. Oops.

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • TubeTube Administrator, ClubPA admin
    edited March 2010
    So yesterday I ended up trying to convince a girl not to commit suicide

    When I leave I hear one of my friends say to another "how did he get so good at convincing people not to commit suicide" and the other friend goes

    "you ever hear about a site called Penny Arcade?"

    Tube on
    Hobnail wrote: »
    This forum has taken everything from me
  • ButlerButler 89 episodes or bust Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    So part of your job is to keep us from killing ourselves?

    I guess that explains the Morrissey prohibition.

    Butler on
    Gvzbgul wrote: »
    A new born baby's skin is still porous, you can just leave them sitting in a bucket of blood and they'll soak up what they need.
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited March 2010
    So yesterday I ended up trying to convince a girl not to commit suicide

    When I leave I hear one of my friends say to another "how did he get so good at convincing people not to commit suicide" and the other friend goes

    "you ever hear about a site called Penny Arcade?"

    but tube

    did she do it or not

    your reputation is at stake here

    Quoth on
  • scsscsscsscs Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    So yesterday I ended up trying to convince a girl not to commit suicide

    When I leave I hear one of my friends say to another "how did he get so good at convincing people not to commit suicide" and the other friend goes

    "you ever hear about a site called Penny Arcade?"

    Was it anything like that scene in Dirty Harry?

    Also, happy birthday.

    scsscs on
  • mensch-o-maticmensch-o-matic Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Ahahahaha

    mensch-o-matic on
  • T. J. Nutty Nub T. J. Nutty Nub Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Tube, convince me not to commit suicide

    T. J. Nutty Nub on
  • DarmakDarmak RAGE vympyvvhyc vyctyvyRegistered User regular
    edited March 2010
    DO IT

    Darmak on
    eg62xrm.jpg
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Your life is not worth living and you hate yourself. Therefore, you should keep living just to spite yourself.

    Caulk Bite 6 on
    jnij103vqi2i.png
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    my bad

    Abracadaniel on
  • DislexicDislexic Registered User
    edited March 2010
    Run everyone! This will not end well for any of us

    Happy Birthday anyway, Tube

    Dislexic on
    batsig.jpg
  • alternatingAberrationalternatingAberration I am the milk man My milk is deliciousRegistered User regular
    edited March 2010
    You may be able to stop suicide, Tube. But can you convince someone to kill themselves?

    alternatingAberration on
    xI8QS1g.jpg?1
  • MetroidZoidMetroidZoid Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Happy Belated B-day, Tube

    MetroidZoid on
    9UsHUfk.jpgSteam
    3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
  • Caulk Bite 6Caulk Bite 6 One of the multitude of Dans infesting this place Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Krosius wrote: »
    You may be able to stop suicide, Tube. But can you convince someone to kill themselves?

    Uh... I came away with the message that he succeeded in stopping her.

    Caulk Bite 6 on
    jnij103vqi2i.png
  • KrunkMcGrunkKrunkMcGrunk Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Darmak wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    Darmak wrote: »
    Fiz wrote: »
    Tube, Ricky Martin came out today. He came out on your birthday to try to steal your thunder. Have sex with him to get revenge. He's apparently up for that now

    I called that shit years ago.
    as did anyone with two eyes and a brain

    hell, my dog saw him on tv and was all 'bark bark dude is gay as dicks bark!'

    I know but all the girls I used to know adamantly refused to believe me that he was gay. Like they had some secret hope in their little hearts that they'd meet him and he'd want to marry them on the spot or something. Joke's on them, he'd want to marry me on the spot!

    As they have done with every attractive gay man ever.

    KrunkMcGrunk on
    mrsatansig.png
  • BusterKBusterK Negativity is Boring Cynicism is Cowardice Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    I was a bit disturbed to find out how many posters threaten suicide after being banned

    BusterK on
    Visit http://www.cruzflores.com for all your Cruz Flores needs. Also listen to the podcast I do with Penguin Incarnate http://wgsgshow.podomatic.com
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  • SquallSquall hap cloud Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    BusterK wrote: »
    I was a bit disturbed to find out how many posters threaten suicide after being banned

    what

    Squall on
  • DarmakDarmak RAGE vympyvvhyc vyctyvyRegistered User regular
    edited March 2010
    Squall wrote: »
    BusterK wrote: »
    I was a bit disturbed to find out how many posters threaten suicide after being banned

    what

    Yeah, I'd like to know who.

    Darmak on
    eg62xrm.jpg
  • AntimatterAntimatter Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    I'm reasonably sure that's no one's business

    Antimatter on
  • SquallSquall hap cloud Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    I was more curious about the volume of people and circumstances

    not the names

    Squall on
  • ButtcleftButtcleft Registered User regular
    edited March 2010
    I would think Tube would be the leading cause of suicide

    not the leading prevention of suicide

    Buttcleft on
    that's it, I'm shutting this entire forum down, everyone thank buttcleft
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