I agree about the photographers. A key thing for them is the ability to blend in.
I'm not sure if people have mentioned it yet, but from all people that you hire....check references.
Good call. Our venue actually had a list of recommended suppliers. We got a few of our services from that list and the rest we talent-spotted at other weddings we'd been to (we actually approached our DJ after a wedding we were at a year before and asked for his number). The advantage of the recommended list is that the suppliers from there will typically have experience of the chosen venue to begin with, which makes coordination simpler - if the flower suppliers know the venue, they can better calculate requirements, if the photographers know the venue, they'll already have it pre-scouted for the best photo-ops, if the caterers know the venue, they'll be able to blend more easily with the the practices of the venue's staff etc. Makes you're job of organising everything a lot easier.
Picking up some planning software or book is highly recommended. It'll help you think of all the little crap that is so easily overlooked. It'll also probably give you a general timeline as to when certain things should be taken care of and in what order is the most efficient.
If you're planning a big reception, having it at a hotel is the way to go. Especially if your families are kinda spread out, or if they're partiers (like my family). Usually the hotel will give you a discount rate for a certain number of rooms, too. That was probably the smartest thing we did. After the reception was over, close friends and family just moved the party to the hotel bar. It was a really great way to wind-down the evening and really get to enjoy the moment with the people that mattered most to us.
And definitely go with either a DJ or a live band. We went the 7-piece live band route, and we couldn't have been happier with the results. Just keep in my that a band is going to cost alot more than a DJ (we had to pay for 7 people, not just one DJ), so that'll probably be a big part of the decision. And you really have to request to hear/see some of their previous reception work. The DJ/Band are really what make or break a reception. A good one can really make up for any of the other shortcomings, but no matter how good everything else is a bad one will really drag everything else down.
I was hoping on hiring Dr Jim and the Rock and Roll Lawyers (a classic rock coverband done headed by my employers number 3 lawyer. they are really good) but there are some good points about a DJ. One more thing to consider.
We will be looking for photographers at an appropriate time, How far in advance should we book these?
I don't know the exact, but if they are good they could be booked out much further than that. Keep in mind that it may take you a bit to select one to your liking as well.
Picking up some planning software or book is highly recommended. It'll help you think of all the little crap that is so easily overlooked. It'll also probably give you a general timeline as to when certain things should be taken care of and in what order is the most efficient.
We actually booked our's more than a year in advance. Same with the reception hall We got married in September (little did we know before hand that Septemper is the most popular month for weddings).
It is completely possible to pull off a $30k+ wedding in under 3 months (no she wasn't pregnant).
That said some places expect reservations a minimum of 1 year in advance, so just prepare to try multiple places and people for all your needs.
Am I wrong in thinking that if you're willing to throw $30k at a wedding that most people would bend over backwards to throw it for you in any amount of time that you gave them?
Am I wrong in thinking that if you're willing to throw $30k at a wedding that most people would bend over backwards to throw it for you in any amount of time that you gave them?
Yes, you are absolutely wrong. Our's was like a little less than $25K and was in the planning stage for over a year.
The problem we had was the whole "September wedding" thing. When they demand for a product far exceeds the supply, it doesn't really matter. There is always someone else that'll take you spot if you don't want it.
se we were hoping for the summer solstace of 2008 (probably not going to happen then) we also think it whould be a good idea to get married on an off day, like thursday.
to quote my Father "who gets married on a Thursday?"
Am I wrong in thinking that if you're willing to throw $30k at a wedding that most people would bend over backwards to throw it for you in any amount of time that you gave them?
Yes, you are absolutely wrong. Our's was like a little less than $25K and was in the planning stage for over a year.
Yeah it's all a matter of what your wonderful, but obviously insane for spending that much, in laws are willing to pay for.
Actually we were very lucky on the location. It was expensive as hell but amazing and pretty close to our home area.
I'd recommend contacting photographers as soon as you have a fixed date. Beyond price, etc., you'll want to examine examples of their previous work and make sure they'll work with you for shots you want (not just their standards). Also, some have specific ideas about when the non-ceremony shots should be taken (i.e., before or after the ceremony), so make sure that matches your preferences.
se we were hoping for the summer solstace of 2008 (probably not going to happen then) we also think it whould be a good idea to get married on an off day, like thursday.
to quote my Father "who gets married on a Thursday?"
Personally, if I was going to a wedding on a Thursday the idea of having to get up the next morning to go to work would kinda put a damper on the whole event.
Am I wrong in thinking that if you're willing to throw $30k at a wedding that most people would bend over backwards to throw it for you in any amount of time that you gave them?
Yes, you are absolutely wrong. Our's was like a little less than $25K and was in the planning stage for over a year.
Yeah, 25-30k is practically a minimum average for a full-blown wedding. People who's business is weddings aren't going to be particularly impressed by sums in that range.
re days - bear in mind that if you have the wedding on a week day, guests will need to take time off work etc. In other words, picking a week day will make life very difficult for guests and likely drastically reduce your number of acceptances.
se we were hoping for the summer solstace of 2008 (probably not going to happen then) we also think it whould be a good idea to get married on an off day, like thursday.
to quote my Father "who gets married on a Thursday?"
Personally, if I was going to a wedding on a Thursday the idea of having to get up the next morning to go to work would kinda put a damper on the whole event.
He could always just take Thursday and Friday off.
A few pointers from when my wife and I organized our wedding a few years ago.
Regarding the photographer, make sure to discuss the cost of print sets, and if possible, negotiate to purchase the negatives/raw digital source from them. We bought the negatives from the film pictures, and a CD of the raw high detail digital pictures for a fairly cheap price, thus allowing us to make prints much cheaper with a local photo development place, as well as giving us the ability to get new copies easily any time we needed them, and the ability to share around the images without worrying about copyright infringement. A good photographer can make or break your wedding experience.
If you are planning an outdoor wedding, don't forget to book a tent and chairs.
If you're having a dinner, consider doing it buffet style rather than course style. We had enough differing tastes for the people attending our wedding, that it worked out. At the very least, if you have people with special dietary needs (vegans, vegetarians, allergies, medical conditions) be sure to have an option prepared for them. If you're dealing with a caterer seperate from dinner venue, they'll often have worked at your venue before, and will have connections they'll use to your benefit. Our caterer didn't just handle the food, they also set up the tables and place settings in advance, handled renting anything that wasn't provided at the venue, as well as small extra touches on the fly (Such as the punch fountain we ended up with as a surprise).
Any really big stuff that'll be in high demand (venues and services), you should work on getting booked six months ahead or so.
Don't forget to get a gift for your best man(men).
If you're unfamiliar with a lot of wedding tradition, brush up on it with some reading. I felt like the biggest dumbass in the world when I stared at my wife in confusion at the dinner while everyone clinked on their glasses with utensils, and she hurriedly explained to me that meant we were supposed to kiss. This was fun up until it started actively interfering with dinner. It also had nothing on the tradition of feeding wedding cake to each other using your fingers. Fortunately that was reserved for a seperate reception later on in her neck of the woods.
The clinking glass thing can grow old very very very fast.
*clinking* Awww..keeses
*more clinking* hehe...keeses
*even more clinking* hang on, I need to swallow this piece of steak I was chewing.....keeses
*still fucking clinking* babe, I love you...but I'm not kissing you...this cheesecake is divine.
A good way to counteract this is to supply the DJ with a guest list. Clink 1: Bride and groom kiss. Clink 2: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever). Clink 3: Bride and groom kiss. Clink 4: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever).
I've also seen it done where the bride and groom kiss on every clink, but so does a random name off the guest list.
Enough with how much a "standard" wedding costs. These things vary wildly by locale, personal/familiy preferences and a whole ton of other factors. That's hardly useful information. They'd be better off talking to friends and acquaintances who have had weddings recently and could tell how much things cost them.
On a photographer, I strongly second negotiating to get digital copies of the photos.
besides our wedding is not going to be "standard" the cerimony itself has a total list of 20 individuals, including MrsArbiter, Myself, and the Minister. The Reception is going to be probably just under 150 and more of just a "hey look at us party"
To all the people saying "Screw that, elope," just remember: many women spend their entire lives dreaming about what their wedding will be like. Before you make any decisions, make sure your fiance is ok with every single detail. My wife tells me time and again about women she's met that hold their weddings against their husbands.
I'm not saying it will definitely turn out this way, but you need to keep it in mind.
*edit* And I'm horribly fucking late. Sorry. My point still stands, though.
The clinking glass thing can grow old very very very fast.
*clinking* Awww..keeses
*more clinking* hehe...keeses
*even more clinking* hang on, I need to swallow this piece of steak I was chewing.....keeses
*still fucking clinking* babe, I love you...but I'm not kissing you...this cheesecake is divine.
A good way to counteract this is to supply the DJ with a guest list. Clink 1: Bride and groom kiss. Clink 2: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever). Clink 3: Bride and groom kiss. Clink 4: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever).
I've also seen it done where the bride and groom kiss on every clink, but so does a random name off the guest list.
My wife and I just announced that we were only kissing on the first clink. We then proceeded to ignore anyone who kept clinking after that.
To all the people saying "Screw that, elope," just remember: many women spend their entire lives dreaming about what their wedding will be like. Before you make any decisions, make sure your fiance is ok with every single detail. My wife tells me time and again about women she's met that hold their weddings against their husbands.
I'm not saying it will definitely turn out this way, but you need to keep it in mind.
*edit* And I'm horribly fucking late. Sorry. My point still stands, though.
You're horribly late, but you also didn't bother reading the thread prior to posting, and in doing so ignored a very clear warning to drop this line of discussion from a moderator. Next time this happens because you didn't bother to properly catch up on the thread before rushing to express your opinion on a dead subject you're not going to get off with a warning.
Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
Posts
Good call. Our venue actually had a list of recommended suppliers. We got a few of our services from that list and the rest we talent-spotted at other weddings we'd been to (we actually approached our DJ after a wedding we were at a year before and asked for his number). The advantage of the recommended list is that the suppliers from there will typically have experience of the chosen venue to begin with, which makes coordination simpler - if the flower suppliers know the venue, they can better calculate requirements, if the photographers know the venue, they'll already have it pre-scouted for the best photo-ops, if the caterers know the venue, they'll be able to blend more easily with the the practices of the venue's staff etc. Makes you're job of organising everything a lot easier.
If you're planning a big reception, having it at a hotel is the way to go. Especially if your families are kinda spread out, or if they're partiers (like my family). Usually the hotel will give you a discount rate for a certain number of rooms, too. That was probably the smartest thing we did. After the reception was over, close friends and family just moved the party to the hotel bar. It was a really great way to wind-down the evening and really get to enjoy the moment with the people that mattered most to us.
And definitely go with either a DJ or a live band. We went the 7-piece live band route, and we couldn't have been happier with the results. Just keep in my that a band is going to cost alot more than a DJ (we had to pay for 7 people, not just one DJ), so that'll probably be a big part of the decision. And you really have to request to hear/see some of their previous reception work. The DJ/Band are really what make or break a reception. A good one can really make up for any of the other shortcomings, but no matter how good everything else is a bad one will really drag everything else down.
I was hoping on hiring Dr Jim and the Rock and Roll Lawyers (a classic rock coverband done headed by my employers number 3 lawyer. they are really good) but there are some good points about a DJ. One more thing to consider.
We will be looking for photographers at an appropriate time, How far in advance should we book these?
I don't know the exact, but if they are good they could be booked out much further than that. Keep in mind that it may take you a bit to select one to your liking as well.
We actually booked our's more than a year in advance. Same with the reception hall We got married in September (little did we know before hand that Septemper is the most popular month for weddings).
That said some places expect reservations a minimum of 1 year in advance, so just prepare to try multiple places and people for all your needs.
Yes, you are absolutely wrong. Our's was like a little less than $25K and was in the planning stage for over a year.
to quote my Father "who gets married on a Thursday?"
Yeah it's all a matter of what your wonderful, but obviously insane for spending that much, in laws are willing to pay for.
Actually we were very lucky on the location. It was expensive as hell but amazing and pretty close to our home area.
Personally, if I was going to a wedding on a Thursday the idea of having to get up the next morning to go to work would kinda put a damper on the whole event.
Yeah, 25-30k is practically a minimum average for a full-blown wedding. People who's business is weddings aren't going to be particularly impressed by sums in that range.
re days - bear in mind that if you have the wedding on a week day, guests will need to take time off work etc. In other words, picking a week day will make life very difficult for guests and likely drastically reduce your number of acceptances.
He could always just take Thursday and Friday off.
Agreed.
It might be cheaper, but pain in the ass for the guests. Sunday/Saturday afternoons are acceptable and generally cheaper than Saturday nights.
Regarding the photographer, make sure to discuss the cost of print sets, and if possible, negotiate to purchase the negatives/raw digital source from them. We bought the negatives from the film pictures, and a CD of the raw high detail digital pictures for a fairly cheap price, thus allowing us to make prints much cheaper with a local photo development place, as well as giving us the ability to get new copies easily any time we needed them, and the ability to share around the images without worrying about copyright infringement. A good photographer can make or break your wedding experience.
If you are planning an outdoor wedding, don't forget to book a tent and chairs.
If you're having a dinner, consider doing it buffet style rather than course style. We had enough differing tastes for the people attending our wedding, that it worked out. At the very least, if you have people with special dietary needs (vegans, vegetarians, allergies, medical conditions) be sure to have an option prepared for them. If you're dealing with a caterer seperate from dinner venue, they'll often have worked at your venue before, and will have connections they'll use to your benefit. Our caterer didn't just handle the food, they also set up the tables and place settings in advance, handled renting anything that wasn't provided at the venue, as well as small extra touches on the fly (Such as the punch fountain we ended up with as a surprise).
Any really big stuff that'll be in high demand (venues and services), you should work on getting booked six months ahead or so.
Don't forget to get a gift for your best man(men).
If you're unfamiliar with a lot of wedding tradition, brush up on it with some reading. I felt like the biggest dumbass in the world when I stared at my wife in confusion at the dinner while everyone clinked on their glasses with utensils, and she hurriedly explained to me that meant we were supposed to kiss. This was fun up until it started actively interfering with dinner. It also had nothing on the tradition of feeding wedding cake to each other using your fingers. Fortunately that was reserved for a seperate reception later on in her neck of the woods.
*clinking* Awww..keeses
*more clinking* hehe...keeses
*even more clinking* hang on, I need to swallow this piece of steak I was chewing.....keeses
*still fucking clinking* babe, I love you...but I'm not kissing you...this cheesecake is divine.
A good way to counteract this is to supply the DJ with a guest list.
Clink 1: Bride and groom kiss.
Clink 2: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever).
Clink 3: Bride and groom kiss.
Clink 4: Random name on the list kisses their date (or mom, sister, whatever).
I've also seen it done where the bride and groom kiss on every clink, but so does a random name off the guest list.
On a photographer, I strongly second negotiating to get digital copies of the photos.
I'm not saying it will definitely turn out this way, but you need to keep it in mind.
*edit* And I'm horribly fucking late. Sorry. My point still stands, though.
You're horribly late, but you also didn't bother reading the thread prior to posting, and in doing so ignored a very clear warning to drop this line of discussion from a moderator. Next time this happens because you didn't bother to properly catch up on the thread before rushing to express your opinion on a dead subject you're not going to get off with a warning.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
oddly, I first wrote "kill" and not "kiss"
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