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Simple Life Comics

xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
edited October 2010 in Artist's Corner
UPDATED

okay well me and a friend want to do web comics and need to start somewhere so please comment me and my friend on what you think well really appreciate it (open criticism), we really want this to launch and do good thanks for all the support people and remember if you think there worth it or will be worth it sooner on keep up i will do my best to add a new part of the comic every other day thank you people

its just the startpage+3.jpg

a rough sketches
Black Rock Shooter
211kw9s.jpg

xXxM1NG0xXx on

Posts

  • MagicToasterMagicToaster JapanRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Hello,

    Post images in your thread, not links. You'll get better responses and you won't be in violation of forum rules.

    As for your comic: The font is a little hard to read.

    MagicToaster on
  • earthwormadamearthwormadam ancient crust Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    post images in a hurry

    otherwise your thread gets locked up, do not collect 200 dollars

    EDIT - damn you Toast daaaaamn yooooooou

    earthwormadam on
  • WassermeloneWassermelone Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I clicked through.

    This may sound mean, but they really are awful. I'm not quite sure what to say. Art is just... well its just stick figures so I can't even tell what you intend for it artistically. The humor is... just not funny. Then you make it less funny by 'explaining' the joke below the comic.

    Keep practicing though, everyone starts somewhere and I'm sure if it really is your passion to improve yourself in both humor and art, you will get better.

    *edit

    And jees, that one you actually image linked doesn't even make any sense! Theres not even an explanation this time either!

    Wassermelone on
  • RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    ....what?
    what is happening here

    RubberAC on
  • VeromVerom Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I have 2 main issues with this
    clarity of storytelling and art

    The art, frankly it's bad.
    There are simple styles and there are sloppy styles for the sake of the style of the comic, this just looks effortless. there are white spots everywhere and it just looks really unappealing.
    The comics are ridiculously oversized for only 2 panels with more or less nothing going on in them, tone it down a bit. There's no need for all that space.

    I get what's going on here sorta, but the way you guys made it is incredibly confusing, why is a squirrel suddenly there, and then blows up, are squirrels not english? Where did the plane go in a timespan I would only assume is 10 seconds tops, why is there a knight getting out of a plane?

    P.S.
    FYI Im aware they suck and lack quality but its just the start
    I don't like this, I don't like this at all, starting of a comic is no excuse to not try, unless I'm misreading this, if that's the case ignore this.

    Verom on
  • iglidanteiglidante Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I'm going to be completely honest with you: the artwork on these is completely abysmal with absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever.

    There's "bad" art for the sake of affectation. Stick figure strips and scribbles. But even then, composition and layout are important (think XKCD - some of his stuff is downright nice, despite its crudeness). And poor artwork can be saved, sometimes, by strong lines and attractive colors. But you've thrown all that out the window. You've got:

    - Aliasing up the ass. Stairsteps on every single curve.
    - Poor coloring job. You need to use layers (and something other than what is probably MS Paint). to keep your boundaries clean.
    - No effort made to draw things correctly. This isn't a style you've chosen - it's a lack of skill. Bodies are misshapen, and the airplane looks like a turd on a tripod.
    - Unattractive (and inconsistent) font selection and placement).

    But these can all be fixed. How exactly are you making these comics? What are your plans for this?

    iglidante on
  • earthwormadamearthwormadam ancient crust Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    The art is bad, but that could be overlooked if you could properly illustrate ideas, through the process of storyboarding. Unfortunately, the art does not properly illustrate ideas through the process of storyboarding.

    Also huge images! Way too huge.

    earthwormadam on
  • pogo mudderpogo mudder Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I've read this comic through about 5 times now and i still can't work out what it's about. This is how I interpreted what is going on here:

    Neil goes to the motherland, (which i assume is meant to be Russia, but on this world its a tiny little island).

    Neil gets off the plane to meet Rosco (a Caribbean looking black man with dread locks speaking in ancient Greek) also neil is a knight.

    The plane completely disappears as neil walks off screen and a squirrel appears (Rosco looks pleased and confused).

    Neil returns with a packet of Cheetos causing the squirrel to explode and the language to be 'patched' to English

    Neil and Rosco awkwardly exchange a hello.


    I still don't get the punchline.

    pogo mudder on
    what a work of art is man, and the most boring choice you can make
  • nakirushnakirush Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I still don't get the punchline.

    This is a political comic. It's pure satire on the American culture and its effects on the rest of the world; air travel is no longer perceived as safe so we need the armor to travel, snack wrappers kill animals, and something to do with American culture wiping out other fine cultures?

    Yeah... I'm lost, too...

    nakirush on
  • Stupid Mr Whoopsie NameStupid Mr Whoopsie Name Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2010
    This is an All Points Bulletin for M1NG0. It's in your best interest to respond by the end of the weekend or your thread is forfeit.

    Stupid Mr Whoopsie Name on
  • xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    nakirush wrote: »
    I still don't get the punchline.

    This is a political comic. It's pure satire on the American culture and its effects on the rest of the world; air travel is no longer perceived as safe so we need the armor to travel, snack wrappers kill animals, and something to do with American culture wiping out other fine cultures?

    Yeah... I'm lost, too...

    I like that but no the armor is what he wears though out the comic. Now as for the comic Rosco speak the language of the motherland which in this world is it's own island. Neil doesn't understand him, so he go and gets a English patch and applies it to Rosco. The Squirrel is foreshadowing of a future comic ark in which, Niel gets the squirrel and Rosco gets the T-Rex with a square head. I am moving away from the two character though.

    xXxM1NG0xXx on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    you posted words

    I am not quite sure they mean anything

    but they are words

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • WassermeloneWassermelone Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    nakirush wrote: »
    I still don't get the punchline.

    This is a political comic. It's pure satire on the American culture and its effects on the rest of the world; air travel is no longer perceived as safe so we need the armor to travel, snack wrappers kill animals, and something to do with American culture wiping out other fine cultures?

    Yeah... I'm lost, too...

    I like that but no the armor is what he wears though out the comic. Now as for the comic Rosco speak the language of the motherland which in this world is it's own island. Neil doesn't understand him, so he go and gets a English patch and applies it to Rosco. The Squirrel is foreshadowing of a future comic ark in which, Niel gets the squirrel and Rosco gets the T-Rex with a square head. I am moving away from the two character though.

    What. :?

    Wassermelone on
  • pogo mudderpogo mudder Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    UPDATED
    startpage+3.jpg

    Well i suppose there are quite a few improvements here. First off, i understand what the comic is about. The joke has not been executed well though (mainly because of how you explain the joke for everyone in the 4th panel, but generally because this joke is like literally a decade old).
    Also surrounding geography aside, Africa does actually look like Africa :^:. And the close up of Duke Nukem looks a bit better than your stick men.

    I think that's about it

    pogo mudder on
    what a work of art is man, and the most boring choice you can make
  • EdmanEdman Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Protip: I don't think there's been a war in the Holy Land between Catholics and Jews.

    Edman on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    you know

    the artwork has been improved

    but going to the well for dated jokes actually feels like a regression

    and I am not trying to be a jerk here, but has anyone ever said you were funny?

    like anyone, other than your friends/relatives said you were humorous?

    if not, maybe you should leave comedy alone.

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    There is literally only one thing for it, get worse, become even more surreal and unintelligible. Then people might read it for the mind-fuck, as it stands this comic is too far below anyone's bar for entertainment.

    Endless_Serpents on
  • Stupid Mr Whoopsie NameStupid Mr Whoopsie Name Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2010
    Edman wrote: »
    Protip: I don't think there's been a war in the Holy Land between Catholics and Jews.

    Well, unless you count the Jewthlics.

    Stupid Mr Whoopsie Name on
  • xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    hmmmmm ive come to a sort of conclusion to post my ideas first before i actually incorporate it in a comic, that way it might save me from some bad comments haha

    anyways i have 2 actually

    1.halo reach amor abilities cons

    evade- roll into passing vehicle
    armor lock- surrounded by the whole opposeing team
    drop shield- your own gernade lands in your drop shield
    hologram- guy standing next to his own hologram and gamertag appears over his head and gets sniped
    jetpack- jet pack to high airplane hits you
    camo- defect in camo leaves only one hand visible
    sprint- IS PERFECT

    2.3 pokemon moves incorperated with sex

    harden, string shot, rest

    xXxM1NG0xXx on
  • RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Your ideas are all pretty bad and youre a bad writer and artist
    i suggest before committing yourself to a "Webcomic" or any sort of long-term project you spend a lot of time on your fundamentals as both a comedic writer and artist

    RubberAC on
  • AlecxantAlecxant Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Honestly, try taking some classes or something. You clearly don't have a grasp on several fundamentals. It looks rushed and poorly executed. The colors are flat and uninteresting. The art doesn't compliment the writing very well. It's just not very good.

    You arn't ready for a web comic. Keep a sketchbook, draw from life, take some classes, practice often, etc etc.

    Alecxant on
  • xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Alecxant wrote: »
    You arn't ready for a web comic. Keep a sketchbook, draw from life, take some classes, practice often, etc etc.

    i do sketch i sketch alot and there way better than this i just cant sketch on a computer sketch pad thingy good enough to look like my drawings (post some sketches later) its just the storys in the comics all i need help with :/ i know i dont fully comprehend the concept of making a good comic because im young and still a bit immature i guess, buts thats why i post em in forums to get advice and at out school there are no art classes :(

    xXxM1NG0xXx on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Edman wrote: »
    Protip: I don't think there's been a war in the Holy Land between Catholics and Jews.

    Well, unless you count the Jewthlics.

    pffffft no one counts them

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • IrukaIruka Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited October 2010
    How old are you Ming?

    Don't get discuraged, art and writing is hard work.

    We are more of an art forum than a writing forum, so people are going to focus on the artwork. You are in a day and age where being a self taught artist can be even more efficient than taking classes. While tablets do sometimes hurt the quality of pictures, it looks like there are basics that are just missing. Check out The Questions and tutorial thread. For a huge list of books and online resources. If you want comics specifically I'd suggest Scott McCloud. No amount of books and tutorials will replace drawing from life. Work really hard on drawing what you see.

    Iruka on
  • xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Iruka wrote: »
    How old are you Ming?

    Honestly im 16, and thanks for the tut thread

    xXxM1NG0xXx on
  • IrukaIruka Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited October 2010
    I see the anime drawing you added to your original post. Its not great but it is better than I would have expected from the comic. When you start by drawing anime, generally you start compiling a bunch of symbols for "eyes" and "Hair" and "boobs" without a full understanding of why something going where.

    If you are serious about getting into art, and really want to improve, theres hard work ahead of you. You really have to try and tackle realistic subjects and drawing from life. Drawing and writing are two whole and separate beasts. If you really want to do both, I recommend starting to read a lot and try to really break down how stories/jokes are constructed.

    Unfortunately, you aren't at a place where we can nitpick these works into being better, you really need to dive in to doing some studies and improving overall.

    Iruka on
  • NakedZerglingNakedZergling A more apocalyptic post apocalypse Portland OregonRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    I think some of these ideas are better. The armor lock one could be be done well i think. The ones that aren't in game problems (airplane, visible hand) don't work, and the grenade and hologram "cons" are just a result of an idiot player.
    But the armorlock...yeah that one hits home.


    hmmmmm ive come to a sort of conclusion to post my ideas first before i actually incorporate it in a comic, that way it might save me from some bad comments haha

    anyways i have 2 actually

    1.halo reach amor abilities cons

    evade- roll into passing vehicle
    armor lock- surrounded by the whole opposeing team
    drop shield- your own gernade lands in your drop shield
    hologram- guy standing next to his own hologram and gamertag appears over his head and gets sniped
    jetpack- jet pack to high airplane hits you
    camo- defect in camo leaves only one hand visible
    sprint- IS PERFECT

    2.3 pokemon moves incorperated with sex

    harden, string shot, rest

    NakedZergling on
  • winter_combat_knightwinter_combat_knight Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Alecxant wrote: »
    You arn't ready for a web comic. Keep a sketchbook, draw from life, take some classes, practice often, etc etc.

    i do sketch i sketch alot and there way better than this i just cant sketch on a computer sketch pad thingy good enough to look like my drawings (post some sketches later) its just the storys in the comics all i need help with :/ i


    Theres a huge contrast between your Duke comic and anime pencil drawing. If its an issue with digital medium then just do them on paper. Most DC and Marvel comics are drawn and inked traditionally, and its usually just the colour which is added digitally.

    That anime drawing is really good. Nice line work and nice subtle tones. There seems like you spent a good amount of time on it.

    That Duke comic looks like you've put no effort in at all. Im not having a crack at your drawing skills (or your writing) - just your effort. Cmon mate, even someone that has never picked up a pencil before can draw something better than that. Your anime drawing proves you have the skills - now apply it to your comics.

    Honestly though, i think you're aiming for a 'low' quality on purpose and you're just posting for fun to get some negative reactions (its common in this forum).

    winter_combat_knight on
  • iglidanteiglidante Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    So, you're drawing these with a tablet? If so, it can take a lot of practice to learn coordination between your hand and the screen. It took me a solid year to get comfortable on my Wacom.

    iglidante on
  • xXxM1NG0xXxxXxM1NG0xXx Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    iglidante wrote: »
    So, you're drawing these with a tablet?
    Yes i use a tablet i just had got it last monday and this is my first week just starting, which is why my comics come out the way they do, i have no practice, but in due time im sure theyll up a lot and soon become world wide know mwhahah :D

    xXxM1NG0xXx on
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