As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/

[INTERNET DATING] It's like video games, except not

15658606162

Posts

  • FroThulhuFroThulhu Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Nah, I'm just sayin'. Any time I see a couple 'get back together,' it's fairly toxic. Any negative stuff from their past relationship tends to resurface. Then again, there are plenty of well-adjusted people who can deal with said baggage.

    FroThulhu on
  • JragghenJragghen Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    FroThulhu wrote: »
    Nah, I'm just sayin'. Any time I see a couple 'get back together,' it's fairly toxic. Any negative stuff from their past relationship tends to resurface. Then again, there are plenty of well-adjusted people who can deal with said baggage.

    Thus far, nothing has, and it's been a couple weeks at this point.

    Most likely because what had come up previously was really, really stupid stuff which was stress-induced, but enough to mess things up in what was a fledgling relationship in the first place.

    We're both well-adjusted, so I could see it working. At the same time, I could see it not, as well. But I think it was obvious we'd both been thinking about one another a fair bit, and we're both still interested, so I'm more than willing to give it another shot.

    Jragghen on
  • FroThulhuFroThulhu Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Then I well and truly wish you two the best. I may be a synical, bitter jerk, but I almost always wanna see two people who are happy together stay that way.

    FroThulhu on
  • JeanJean Heartbroken papa bear Gatineau, QuébecRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Yo, Fartacus, you said you paid $75 for a 2 person meal. i'd like to know if that includes any tips/taxes/ alcohol :)

    My parents often pay that much for one person but thats for haute cuisine française and they drink wine like it was water. What did you ate that cost so much?

    I'm not critical, just curious ;)

    Jean on
    "You won't destroy us, You won't destroy our democracy. We are a small but proud nation. No one can bomb us to silence. No one can scare us from being Norway. This evening and tonight, we'll take care of each other. That's what we do best when attacked'' - Jens Stoltenberg
  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited November 2010
    Organichu wrote: »
    i'm sure you can cook lecaustic

    but there is a well cooked meal and there is a very well cooked meal

    i mean, sure, part of dropping >$100 on dinner is for the experience- the ambiance, the service, etc

    but good restaurants make good food... really good food! it's what they do for a living

    I make better food than most restaurants and I fucking suck at cooking.

    i'm not convinced that your local chili's qualifies as a good restaurant

    Organichu on
  • JustinSane07JustinSane07 Really, stupid? Brockton__BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2010
    Organichu wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i'm sure you can cook lecaustic

    but there is a well cooked meal and there is a very well cooked meal

    i mean, sure, part of dropping >$100 on dinner is for the experience- the ambiance, the service, etc

    but good restaurants make good food... really good food! it's what they do for a living

    I make better food than most restaurants and I fucking suck at cooking.

    i'm not convinced that your local chili's qualifies as a good restaurant

    I don't even know where the closest chilis is.

    JustinSane07 on
  • EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I'm with Organichu on this. Most restaurants around DC/Baltimore are going to be about $20/plate, and if you're having a good time with someone that means you're probably sitting at the table longer and can do shit like order dessert. Because dessert is fun when you're having a good time. Maybe even a coffee. And hell yeah you get drinks at dinner when you're out with someone that you like.

    Sure, if the person's a fug and you just want to eat and run, the bill won't top $50. Some personal stats — my last meal out with the wife for an anniversary was $150, including a bottle of wine and tax and tip. My last anniversary meal that I cooked was easily $75 for the two of us because I got fancy-ass scallops, a nice bottle of wine, and probably made a wine reduction sauce and other shit. We're married and we like each other -- why not live it up?

    I think you guys complaining just don't know how to enjoy going out to eat. You do it occasionally, and you make it worthwhile.

    EggyToast on
    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • MurphyMurphy Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I split an $80 tab just this Friday having a casual dinner with a friend at a local sushi place (did not include tip, but did include delicious alcohol). Restaurants be pricey, yo.

    I finally dipped my toe back into OKC. Then I remembered why I stopped checking my messages there.

    Murphy on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    So I really hit it off I think with this asian girl on okc

    At least I'm pretty sure she digs me because she messaged me first etc

    So I'm trying to make the convo more personal (we've exchanged like ten messages within like, a day), but I'm kind of at a loss for how to do that

    what do y'all suggest I do

    I've tried asking her what she likes but her messages are really short and there's not much to go off on there

    Rent on
  • monikermoniker Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    So I really hit it off I think with this asian girl on okc

    At least I'm pretty sure she digs me because she messaged me first etc

    So I'm trying to make the convo more personal (we've exchanged like ten messages within like, a day), but I'm kind of at a loss for how to do that

    what do y'all suggest I do

    I've tried asking her what she likes but her messages are really short and there's not much to go off on there

    Rather than try and get more personal via e-mail, why not try and get more personal...personally?

    Ask her if she'd want to grab a cuppa sometime and suggest a time/place. Preferably if you can work it into the conversation in some manner, but if not then be relatively blunt about it since it'd just be a coffee date. Or, if you think that you can skip the 'prove you aren't a serial killer and that we'll click' phase ask her to dinner or something.

    moniker on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I dunno she literally just started messaging me this morning

    Isn't that a bit abrupt?

    Rent on
  • NocturneNocturne Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Just off the top of my head, ways to make a relationship more personal:

    Exchange real first names if you haven't yet

    Talk about family/work, but only elaborate on either if it's interesting

    Exchange embarrassing stories

    Go into detail about your favorite band/movie/whatever and why you like it so much

    Nocturne on
  • DemerdarDemerdar Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    I dunno she literally just started messaging me this morning

    Isn't that a bit abrupt?

    Yes, pretty abrupt.

    You need to start communicating via some other channel, like instant messaging or texting. Email will only get you so far, and you really can't get a feel for the other person without having a constant back-and-forth with them.

    Demerdar on
    y6GGs3o.gif
  • RaslinRaslin Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    This might sound like a strange question

    Especially because I'm not looking for it(I swear!)

    But uhh, anyone know any good, free websites meant for casual sex?

    I know about the following, that can be used for it

    OKC
    PoF
    CL

    Looking for any other free ones with at least a decent userbase, and again, fully free.

    Raslin on
    I cant url good so add me on steam anyways steamcommunity.com/id/Raslin

    3ds friend code: 2981-6032-4118
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    adultfriendfinder?

    Rent on
  • RaslinRaslin Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I thought that had a pay component?

    Edit: Yup, pay component.

    Raslin on
    I cant url good so add me on steam anyways steamcommunity.com/id/Raslin

    3ds friend code: 2981-6032-4118
  • Styrofoam SammichStyrofoam Sammich WANT. normal (not weird)Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Raslin wrote: »
    This might sound like a strange question

    Especially because I'm not looking for it(I swear!)

    But uhh, anyone know any good, free websites meant for casual sex?

    I know about the following, that can be used for it

    OKC
    PoF
    CL

    Looking for any other free ones with at least a decent userbase, and again, fully free.

    Enjoy your Clap/Chlamydia/Hep/Syph

    Styrofoam Sammich on
    wq09t4opzrlc.jpg
  • RaslinRaslin Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Raslin wrote: »
    This might sound like a strange question

    Especially because I'm not looking for it(I swear!)

    But uhh, anyone know any good, free websites meant for casual sex?

    I know about the following, that can be used for it

    OKC
    PoF
    CL

    Looking for any other free ones with at least a decent userbase, and again, fully free.

    Enjoy your Clap/Chlamydia/Hep/Syph

    Again, not looking for it. Although I have met girls on PoF and OKC for it, and those turned out great(but seriously, not looking to get laid here, this is a fact finding expedition).

    Raslin on
    I cant url good so add me on steam anyways steamcommunity.com/id/Raslin

    3ds friend code: 2981-6032-4118
  • AgesAges Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    I dunno she literally just started messaging me this morning

    Isn't that a bit abrupt?

    Get her AIM or something, or if you're feeling adventurous, her telephone number, and chat there for a few hours or what-have-you. Then when you're comfortable talking to one another, ask her to grab some coffee with you.

    Ages on
  • Eat it You Nasty Pig.Eat it You Nasty Pig. tell homeland security 'we are the bomb'Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    If you traded a bunch of messages today, I think it's fine to send a message to the effect of "hey, you seem pretty cool, want to get a coffee on saturday?" or whatever.

    You did or said something well enough that this person is interested enough to carry on a convo via email with you; an invite to real-life meeting from there isn't that outlandish.

    Eat it You Nasty Pig. on
    NREqxl5.jpg
    it was the smallest on the list but
    Pluto was a planet and I'll never forget
  • BeastehBeasteh THAT WOULD NOT KILL DRACULARegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    nobody has viewed my profile since october 12th, can anyone give an opinion as to why

    Beasteh on
  • BuddiesBuddies Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Beasteh wrote: »
    nobody has viewed my profile since october 12th, can anyone give an opinion as to why

    You haven't updated anything?


    The easiest way to get people to check out your profile is to upload a new picture. Re-write your "What I do on Friday Nights" to be "What I did the last 2 Friday Nights". That way you update your profile every week-2 weeks, and it keeps your profile active and refreshing on the girls main pages.

    Buddies on
  • FartacusFartacus __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2010
    It's funny to me that the thing in my description that attracted dismay and surprise was spending $75 on dinner, but in real life, all my friends thought that was a good deal, but balked at the carriage ride part, to the point where I'm not even mentioning it to anyone who doesn't already know, because everyone's giving me so much shit for it.

    I guess my friends are all jaded high-spenders and folks here are cheap dorks

    Fartacus on
  • GodfatherGodfather Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Cheap dorks? Most kids on here are in college, what did you expect?

    I didn't read about the whole expensive dinner scenario you posted, but was this for a first date or what? Dropping seventy five on that is extremely stupid.

    Godfather on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Ages wrote: »
    Rent wrote: »
    I dunno she literally just started messaging me this morning

    Isn't that a bit abrupt?

    Get her AIM or something, or if you're feeling adventurous, her telephone number, and chat there for a few hours or what-have-you.

    She actually offered to text me

    This is...this is really bizarre

    Rent on
  • MalkorMalkor Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    Ages wrote: »
    Rent wrote: »
    I dunno she literally just started messaging me this morning

    Isn't that a bit abrupt?

    Get her AIM or something, or if you're feeling adventurous, her telephone number, and chat there for a few hours or what-have-you.

    She actually offered to text me

    This is...this is really bizarre

    Are you up for an SMS relationship? I got some beefy fingers and mad text skills after one of those.

    Malkor on
    14271f3c-c765-4e74-92b1-49d7612675f2.jpg
  • FartacusFartacus __BANNED USERS regular
    edited November 2010
    Godfather wrote: »
    Cheap dorks? Most kids on here are in college, what did you expect?

    I didn't read about the whole expensive dinner scenario you posted, but was this for a first date or what? Dropping seventy five on that is extremely stupid.

    not a first date, no

    Although I have spent that on a first date before

    I mean, the plus side is that I get to enjoy the really great food

    Like people seem to be missing that part

    The food is an end unto itself

    Fartacus on
  • EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I would give you shit for the carriage ride but she was into it so whatever. It's a hell of a lot better than a movie. Plus had you done it before? Some of the sappy things like that are OK to do on a date because if you've never done them before you can enjoy it as a new experience. Like "I can't believe I'm on a carriage ride."

    Rent: I don't think it's that weird -- she thinks you're cute and apparently has been enjoying the conversation. When you've gone on dates in the past do you say "hey, I was wondering if you'd like to get lunch. What's your email? I'll send you a few messages and after we talk for a bit we can graduate up to IMs, maybe texts, and then we can see what time works for the both of us to get lunch."?

    EggyToast on
    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    So this girl who's profile I like tells people not to message her unless they're "at least kind of a smartass"

    She also asks what color the dot she has is,

    So I'm thinking:
    The color of your dot

    ...Is red. Of course, you might not actually READ this message because apparently you don't respond to any messages.

    Helpful hint, I guess.

    Rent on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    EggyToast wrote: »

    Rent: I don't think it's that weird -- she thinks you're cute and apparently has been enjoying the conversation. ?

    I mean I think it's weird because I've never had a girl aggressively pursue me before. Especially not a hot 18-year-old asian one

    Rent on
  • Cultural Geek GirlCultural Geek Girl Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fartacus wrote: »
    Godfather wrote: »
    Cheap dorks? Most kids on here are in college, what did you expect?

    I didn't read about the whole expensive dinner scenario you posted, but was this for a first date or what? Dropping seventy five on that is extremely stupid.

    not a first date, no

    Although I have spent that on a first date before

    I mean, the plus side is that I get to enjoy the really great food

    Like people seem to be missing that part

    The food is an end unto itself

    I'm with you, Fartacus. If the food is really great the entire date seems better. If I were a man of means (instead of a woman of freelance) I'd definitely take girls out to swanky restaurants. Plus, and I don't want to sound like a typical girl who is interested only in money here, but a guy's willingness to spend a few bucks on a date sort of implies that he's invested in the idea of us, that he actually likes me, and isn't just setting up dates with every girl he can find.

    Hell, I'd go DUTCH on a really great restaurant as an early date, or first date. I just don't get that many chances to go to a great restaurant, and going there with someone I know isn't going to grouse about prices would be good. I go to this really awesome Tapas place every year that ends up being like $30-35 each ($45-50 with lots of Sangria) and it's one of my favorite things. Live a little.

    Cultural Geek Girl on
    Buttoneer, Brigadeer, and Keeper of the Book of Wil Wheaton.
    Triwizard Drinking Tournament - '09 !Hufflepuff unofficial conscript, '10 !Gryffindor
    Nerd blog at culturalgeekgirl.com
  • JokermanJokerman Everything EverywhereRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    EggyToast wrote: »

    Rent: I don't think it's that weird -- she thinks you're cute and apparently has been enjoying the conversation. ?

    I mean I think it's weird because I've never had a girl aggressively pursue me before. Especially not a hot 18-year-old asian one

    Dont question it, man. First rule of Lucid dreaming is not to pick things apart, just go with it.

    Jokerman on
  • RobmanRobman Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    So this girl who's profile I like tells people not to message her unless they're "at least kind of a smartass"

    She also asks what color the dot she has is,

    So I'm thinking:
    The color of your dot

    ...Is red. Of course, you might not actually READ this message because apparently you don't respond to any messages.

    Helpful hint, I guess.

    Unless you're looking for someone to be abrasive with, is this really a good idea? Don't change yourself to meet someone's expectations, or you'll be deeply unhappy until the relationship dies.

    Robman on
  • JokermanJokerman Everything EverywhereRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fartacus wrote: »
    Godfather wrote: »
    Cheap dorks? Most kids on here are in college, what did you expect?

    I didn't read about the whole expensive dinner scenario you posted, but was this for a first date or what? Dropping seventy five on that is extremely stupid.

    not a first date, no

    Although I have spent that on a first date before

    I mean, the plus side is that I get to enjoy the really great food

    Like people seem to be missing that part

    The food is an end unto itself

    I'm with you, Fartacus. If the food is really great the entire date seems better. If I were a man of means (instead of a woman of freelance) I'd definitely take girls out to swanky restaurants. Plus, and I don't want to sound like a typical girl who is interested only in money here, but a guy's willingness to spend a few bucks on a date sort of implies that he's invested in the idea of us, that he actually likes me, and isn't just setting up dates with every girl he can find.

    Hell, I'd go DUTCH on a really great restaurant as an early date, or first date. I just don't get that many chances to go to a great restaurant, and going there with someone I know isn't going to grouse about prices would be good. I go to this really awesome Tapas place every year that ends up being like $30-35 each ($45-50 with lots of Sangria) and it's one of my favorite things. Live a little.

    Ugh, I get too many first date duds to shell out 30-60 dollars on every first date.

    Not to say I wont take her someplace nice, I just happen to understand price does not equate equaly with quality.

    Jokerman on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Robman wrote: »

    Unless you're looking for someone to be abrasive with, is this really a good idea? Don't change yourself to meet someone's expectations, or you'll be deeply unhappy until the relationship dies.

    See the thing is I AM a huge smartass

    if anything I've been presenting myself as someone who's NOT one to a majority of potential dates

    Rent on
  • RobmanRobman Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Beasteh wrote: »
    nobody has viewed my profile since october 12th, can anyone give an opinion as to why

    College midterms
    Election Frenzy
    Fallout New Vegas
    Halloween
    Halloween regrets

    The list is ripe with possibility. Alternatively, your profile sucks. Got a link to it?

    Robman on
  • RobmanRobman Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    Robman wrote: »

    Unless you're looking for someone to be abrasive with, is this really a good idea? Don't change yourself to meet someone's expectations, or you'll be deeply unhappy until the relationship dies.

    See the thing is I AM a huge smartass

    if anything I've been presenting myself as someone who's NOT one to a majority of potential dates

    Then go for it man. As I said to my timid friend, ain't nobody got with a fine lady by pondering what to say to her until she moved on.

    Robman on
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Oh that reminds me

    I asked for criticisms and didn't receive any so I'm asking again

    Rent wrote: »
    So I made a thing

    criticisms please

    http://www.okcupid.com/profile/renttastic

    I mean I guess it's working for me because I'm getting views and messages and stuff but still...any problems?
    Robman wrote: »
    Rent wrote: »
    Robman wrote: »

    Unless you're looking for someone to be abrasive with, is this really a good idea? Don't change yourself to meet someone's expectations, or you'll be deeply unhappy until the relationship dies.

    See the thing is I AM a huge smartass

    if anything I've been presenting myself as someone who's NOT one to a majority of potential dates

    Then go for it man. As I said to my timid friend, ain't nobody got with a fine lady by pondering what to say to her until she moved on.

    Thanks dudes

    Rent on
  • JokermanJokerman Everything EverywhereRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Rent wrote: »
    Robman wrote: »

    Unless you're looking for someone to be abrasive with, is this really a good idea? Don't change yourself to meet someone's expectations, or you'll be deeply unhappy until the relationship dies.

    See the thing is I AM a huge smartass

    if anything I've been presenting myself as someone who's NOT one to a majority of potential dates

    You and me, Rent. It's you and me against the world!

    Jokerman on
  • LucidLucid Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fartacus wrote: »
    Godfather wrote: »
    Cheap dorks? Most kids on here are in college, what did you expect?

    I didn't read about the whole expensive dinner scenario you posted, but was this for a first date or what? Dropping seventy five on that is extremely stupid.

    not a first date, no

    Although I have spent that on a first date before

    I mean, the plus side is that I get to enjoy the really great food

    Like people seem to be missing that part

    The food is an end unto itself

    I'm with you, Fartacus. If the food is really great the entire date seems better. If I were a man of means (instead of a woman of freelance) I'd definitely take girls out to swanky restaurants. Plus, and I don't want to sound like a typical girl who is interested only in money here, but a guy's willingness to spend a few bucks on a date sort of implies that he's invested in the idea of us, that he actually likes me, and isn't just setting up dates with every girl he can find.

    Hell, I'd go DUTCH on a really great restaurant as an early date, or first date. I just don't get that many chances to go to a great restaurant, and going there with someone I know isn't going to grouse about prices would be good. I go to this really awesome Tapas place every year that ends up being like $30-35 each ($45-50 with lots of Sangria) and it's one of my favorite things. Live a little.
    I don't get the idea that great food at a nice restaurant only comes at 35+$ per person.

    Lucid on
This discussion has been closed.