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Rap Battle Contest - Beta

Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, ClubPA staff
edited July 2011 in Social Entropy++
Internally, Brian (merch guy) and I like to torment Dave Coffman (PAX guy that is super shy) by taking on his (not actually his. Brian and I made it for him) West Coast 80s Rap Persona, DJ DeeCoff. We turn the quiet, mild mannered vegetarian into a lyrical flowing sex-hound that runs PAX on the side.

Anyway, I tell you this story because we're thinking of running a weird contest where the winners get a signed pair of these:
http://www.penny-arcade.com/2011/5/23/shoes/

the pre-order version of this:
http://store.penny-arcade.com/products/blamimations-season-1-dvd-set

and the pre-order version of this:
http://store.penny-arcade.com/products/volume-7-be-good-little-puppy

and a signed copy of the upcoming Season 2 DVD.
(NO LINK YET)

Given the creators (Kris/Scott and Mike/Jerry), I thought that what might be interesting was a contest that had you write a rap battle between the two groups. Is this weird? Yes, it's probably weird. But before we unleashed it onto the wild, I wanted to test the waters with you guys to see if it had legs.

Let's say 12-16 verses each side?

If it does well in here, we'll put it out into the world (whoever is best here I'm sure we can come up with a separate prize, and yeah the stuff you submit here will be put into the main pool as well).

Some guy.
Robert Khoo on
«134

Posts

  • BahamutZEROBahamutZERO Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    So a rap battle between team Kriscott and team... Jermike?

    BahamutZERO on
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  • ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Ahaha. AHAHAH!


    Yes.

    Zonugal on
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  • TenTen Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Oh man, I hope we get to see a performance of the winning battle between the two teams. I might have to consider writing something for this, though rap is far from my specialty.

    Ten on
  • ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Someone alert Qorzm.

    Zonugal on
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  • KochikensKochikens Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    And Jordyn.

    Kochikens on
  • 2 Marcus 2 Ravens2 Marcus 2 Ravens CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    So wait, is this just write a rap and post the wordy words in here? Or can we/should we write/record it to some sick beatz? Perhaps a ballin' video?

    2 Marcus 2 Ravens on
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Let's see. What words rhyme with Khoo?

    Aneurhythmia on
  • QorzmQorzm Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Someone alert Qorzm.
    okay I'm here

    Qorzm on
  • LTMLTM Bikes and BeardsRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    So wait, is this just write a rap and post the wordy words in here? Or can we/should we write/record it to some sick beatz? Perhaps a ballin' video?

    I'm wondering the same thing.

    Does Khoo want this to be a full-fledged remake of Beat It, or just want some "mad rhymes"?

    LTM on
  • Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, ClubPA staff
    edited June 2011
    I don't require laying it down to a track or beat or whatever - you can do that if you want but we're judging only on the merits of the lyrics at this point. :)

    Robert Khoo on
    Some guy.
  • TaskmanTaskman Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    This is a great idea. My only request would be that DJ DeeCoff be made to cast an expert eye over the entries, it sounds like he'd enjoy it. :D

    Taskman on
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  • BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I have already written out Scott's intro in my head

    Bucketman on
  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    This will only lead to good things, Khoo.

    Also, throwing this thread into my sig to get attention from the rest of the board.

    Henroid on
  • SoaLSoaL fantastic Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    this is the best thread I have ever seen

    SoaL on
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  • Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, ClubPA staff
    edited June 2011
    Oh, and to give you an idea... this was the first set of verses from my latest DJ DeeCoff Battle:

    That star up there's called David fo' a reason
    It's cuz I elevate and shine for PAX Season
    So bright the hos clusta' when I meet 'em
    I supernova in their ass and then I leave 'em

    Robert Khoo on
    Some guy.
  • alternatingAberrationalternatingAberration I am the milk man My milk is deliciousRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I support this venture with all of my fighting spirit.

    alternatingAberration on
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  • TurambarTurambar Independent Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    and a signed copy of the upcoming Season 2 DVD.
    (NO LINK YET)
    Is the preorder coming soon?
    Might hold off on ordering Blam S1 to save money on shipping if so

    And wooo, rap battle!

    Turambar on
    Steam: turamb | Origin: Turamb | 3DS: 3411-1109-4537 | NNID: Turambar | Warframe(PC): Turamb
  • PeenPeen Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    This is excellent. The wonders and horrors that could be created, the mind reels.

    Peen on
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Oh boy. I'ma make some dirty raps

    Futore on
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  • SoaLSoaL fantastic Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    robert you are delightful

    SoaL on
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  • ASimPersonASimPerson Cold... and hard.Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Unrelated, but: hey Khoo, this is the last day to order the new book and get the pre-order bonus, right?

    ASimPerson on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2011
    Oh shit.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
  • Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, ClubPA staff
    edited June 2011
    ASimPerson wrote: »
    Unrelated, but: hey Khoo, this is the last day to order the new book and get the pre-order bonus, right?

    Correct!

    Robert Khoo on
    Some guy.
  • WhippyWhippy Moderator, Admin Emeritus Admin Emeritus
    edited June 2011
    Hi Robert!

    Whippy on
  • JordynJordyn Really, Commander? Probing Uranus. Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Rapping?

    Jordyn on
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    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    This could be either the greatest thing ever

    or the greatest thing ever

    Sweeney Tom on
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    like i'ma write raps about you guys getting in butts and stuff

    Futore on
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  • GreyLadyGreyLady Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I'm already quivering in anticipation. This is going to be great

    GreyLady on
  • Indie WinterIndie Winter die Krähe Rudi Hurzlmeier (German, b. 1952)Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Robert how gangsta can this rap be

    are we limited in this regard

    I mean, should we try to shoot for a Will Smith sorta clean, happy thing, or will it be ok to go the early 90's snoop/tupac route?

    Indie Winter on
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  • LTMLTM Bikes and BeardsRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I just realized Jack Thompson is still alive, and that ruined the premise for Tycho's introduction...

    LTM on
  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I'm writing as we speak.

    2 verses in the books.

    #pipe on
  • John ZoidbergJohn Zoidberg Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    It's 1am, I saw this and made this. It could probably use work.

    (K+S)

    Coming at you live from the Blamimation Nation
    We got all that you need so don't change the station
    Time to lay down these sick Blam beats
    So fire up yo' browser and pump out some tweets


    (M+J)

    Now we don't mean to rain on yo' parade
    But we are the boys from Penny Arcade
    We got Dickwolves, Fruitfucker and Wangs galore
    So listen up fools 'cos this is the score


    (K+S)

    Now look here Scott they think they the shit
    But we are next gen and yo' only 8-bit
    Nice call out to the gamers there Kris
    These rhymes we dealin' are sure not to miss


    (M+J)

    You must be trippin' if you think we scared
    We just like Batman fools, we always prepared
    So don't make us throw on our D&D attire
    'Cos that just means yo' rhymes will expire


    (K+S)

    We don't got to sit here and take this from you
    All y'all know we the true PA crew
    We took your throne and rinsed it down
    Whole world knows this is Kris and Scotts town


    (M+J)

    Yo' forget one thang in this lyrical war
    Let us remind you, freshen the score
    We run this ship, starboard, bow and decks
    So get the fuck out and clean out your desks

    John Zoidberg on
    Xbox Live: Ink Pouch / PSN: Stiff_Ninja / Origin: PAZoidberg / Steam
  • LTMLTM Bikes and BeardsRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I'm cutting this off at 7 verses, because I'm sort of out of ideas atm...
    MC BLAM
    With my Rhyming Fez, get ready for a compositional beating
    Like you haven't received since American Greetings
    I rhyme with precision, your rhymes sound like farts
    From a pair of dudes jerkin' to Strawberry ShortTart

    Ice T(ycho)
    I'm above the law, just go ask Jack
    And my gametes are spread further than a nympho bladderwrack
    My vocabulary is endless, like roots of a tree
    And I'll forsake you like I did Precipice: Episode Three

    SK1

    PAX to the north east west and south
    You've got so many people comin' its like a night in your mouth
    Its true you're popular, got an army of noobs
    But I think your talent peaked at "ride bikes and look at boobs"

    G
    Your mumbles aren't rhymes, is that a wang or a mic
    Even Lolbat looks at you and says "does not like"
    If you really wanna battle, I say bring it on
    I'll leave you with nothing but to scream out 'KHAN!'

    MC BLAM
    Your fans write your battle raps, whore 'em up
    But it'd work better, if you could keep the forums up
    Your game is weak, you're no Time who's who
    The real reason you're still here is named Robert Khoo

    G+T
    Has your dad called yet, he'd probably tell you to stop
    I'm gonna pick up this mic, that you so nicely dropped
    But I'm a drawer not a writer, so I'll end this stanza
    something something something something "GIANT PANDA"

    LTM on
  • Robert KhooRobert Khoo Registered User, ClubPA staff
    edited June 2011
    THESE ARE GREAT KEEP THEM COMING

    hi whippy!

    Robert Khoo on
    Some guy.
  • Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    wait so what's the deal

    we're writing a rap where Mike and Jerry are battling Kris and Scott


    this is correct?

    Captain K on
  • DarmakDarmak RAGE vympyvvhyc vyctyvyRegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Captain K wrote: »
    wait so what's the deal

    we're writing a rap where Mike and Jerry are battling Kris and Scott


    this is correct?

    If you do this, you should record yourself rapping it.

    Darmak on
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  • AphostileAphostile San Francisco, CARegistered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Absolutely terrible
    K+S
    Kris and Scott... Scott and Kris...
    We're layin down rhymes, yeah sure, this is bliss
    You think you're big shit with this penny arcade
    But look at this match, you're clearly outweighed


    M+J
    Turn that shit down, you ain't got nothin' on us
    Got four comics but you nothin' but jealous
    Ya'll couldn't help but jump at the chance
    Moved right in here, we got you caught in a trance


    K+S
    Keep actin' like you're the cream of the crop
    We're cuttin' you down like we're runnin' a butcher shop
    Got our kick started, we're ready to circumvent
    Blammin' down magic, right outta' the orient


    M+J
    Look at these two, thinkin' we're outta the game
    We just started, we're bathin' in fame
    Bitches screamin our names in the streets, they can't get enough of this team
    We'll just keep handlin' these beats, while we're makin' your mothers cream


    K+S
    Alright, now that's a step too far, someone's startin' to sound annoyed
    Even your fans can see you're gettin paranoid
    Bow down to your friends turned powerhouses
    We even got you these gifts, brand new pink blouses


    M+J
    Now we know you've given up, ain't got no where to run
    Throwin' out lines like some sawed off shotgun
    Lookin' like zombies, stricken with rigor mortis
    Consider this line your eviction notice
    *Drop mics*

    Aphostile on
    Nothing. Matters.
  • MugginsMuggins Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I'm already disqualified because some have said my rhymes are too ill

    Muggins on
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    hey satan...: thinkgeek amazon My post |
  • Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Darmak wrote: »
    Captain K wrote: »
    wait so what's the deal

    we're writing a rap where Mike and Jerry are battling Kris and Scott


    this is correct?

    If you do this, you should record yourself rapping it.

    actually, once I reread Khoo's OP and realized that was not the point of this exercise, I decided not to do it :P

    Captain K on
  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Great, I can't think of any rap that doesn't start with "I energize labia"

    KalTorak on
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