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Your Breakup Stories

2456710

Posts

  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    That sucks. Some people be crazy. :/

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
  • Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    on the other hand my next girlfriend lived 700 miles away for a good while, and we've been together for over six years

    so

  • ApollohApolloh Registered User regular
    ceres wrote:
    That sucks. Some people be crazy. :/

    I know. Shame it had to end on that note, because all in all, it worked out pretty well. :(

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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited September 2011
    Apolloh wrote:
    ceres wrote:
    That sucks. Some people be crazy. :/

    I know. Shame it had to end on that note, because all in all, it worked out pretty well. :(

    Faking cancer would definitely be the end for me though, what the fuck.

    ceres on
    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
  • MrMonroeMrMonroe passed out on the floor nowRegistered User regular
    one time the girl I wanted to marry dumped me for good over the phone so she could fuck her ex-boyfriend

    I got a gun and was gonna give myself a closed-casket funeral but then I went to the hospital

    and that's the story of how I missed my '09 forum battle

  • Mortal SkyMortal Sky queer punk hedge witchRegistered User regular
    Silent Bob wrote:
    So there's me and Amy, and we're all inseparable, right? Just big time in love. And then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend. Which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how it is: you don't wanna know, but you just have to, right? Stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him... how they fell in love, and how they went out for a couple of years, and how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... and I'm okay. But then she drops the bomb on me, and the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times, while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with them. M&eacutenage &agrave trois, I believe it's called. Now this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sort of thing. I mean, I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.
    Jay wrote:
    Saint Shithead.
    [Silent Bob elbows him; Jay motions as if to start a fight]
    Silent Bob wrote:
    So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? And then I just start blasting her. Like... I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is by calling her a slut, right? And tell her she was used. I'm... I'm out for blood. I really wanna hurt this girl. I'm like, "What the fuck is your problem?", right? And she's just all calmly trying to tell me, like, it was that time and it was that place and she doesn't think she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. I'm like, "Oh, really?" That's when I look her straight in the eye, I tell her it's over. I walk.
    Jay wrote:
    Fuckin' A!
    Silent Bob wrote:
    No, idiot. It was a mistake. I didn't hate her. I wasn't disgusted with her. I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like... like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But, what I did not get, she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was... she was looking for me, for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But I pushed her away. So, I've spent every day since then chasing Amy... so to speak.

  • Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    Waka Laka wrote:
    Nogs wrote:
    i met this Coi guy too eventually

    didn't wear shoes.

    feet were fucking naasty

    plus he was starting to get an infection but refused to go to the doctor.

    Girls and their fetishes with guys who "don't give a shit"

    "He bashes me, but I love him. You don't understand!"
    "He is always on drugs and angry, but I love him! I don't know why"
    "His smelly infected feet are so attractive! You would not know"

    Herp derp.

    misogyny and its

    well, no, just misogyny

  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    my last relationship did not go so well

  • BeastehBeasteh THAT WOULD NOT KILL DRACULARegistered User regular
    when i was 7 this girl told me i was her boyfriend and kept punching me and pulling my hair

  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    i broke my foot looking for my ex in the rain in georgia and then i found her sucking another dudes dick

    awkward

    worst vacation ever, to boot

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  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    my last (only) breakup was

    hmm...back in 07

    i was really sad for a long time and then i got less sad but then i got more sad because of different things on top of that

    so now in this year of our lord jesus christ 2011 i have convinced myself that i'm just not a dude ladies want to be in a relationship with

    it is a self-fulfilling prophecy

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  • Charles KinboteCharles Kinbote Registered User regular
    I'm in a weird situation now

    there's this girl who decided that she was in love with me maybe a year ago
    she wrote me a letter back in maaay and made me a mix cd and has apparently been spending all her time pining over me

    but it isn't real! I mean, she isn't really in love with me, she's just confused. I honestly feel as though I'm not really a part of it, it's just her own thing

    her housemate and I have a bit of a thing, though, but we're gonna sit down and (I think) stop that in the next couple days

  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    my ex was a huge alcoholic bitch and all we did for the last year of our relationship was lie to each other about how many drugs we were doing / whether or not we were fucking dudes (i totally was)

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  • MrMonroeMrMonroe passed out on the floor nowRegistered User regular
    crwth wrote:
    my last (only) breakup was

    hmm...back in 07

    i was really sad for a long time and then i got less sad but then i got more sad because of different things on top of that

    so now in this year of our lord jesus christ 2011 i have convinced myself that i'm just not a dude ladies want to be in a relationship with

    it is a self-fulfilling prophecy

    I'll tell you what I've been told by a number of people who I've tried to sleep with since my HARGLEBARGLE response to my last relationship have told me:

    "You need to relax"

  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    misogyny and its

    well, no, just misogyny

    Thank you for this.

    Really.

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Registered User regular
    My breakups have mostly been sad, quiet affairs that don't really merit a read-through

  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    I don't have bad breakups

    I just have a string of terrible relationships, the breakups were mostly tame

    I think the only funny moment of my last, and most significant breakup, was the last time we went to the marriage counselor a.k.a. the Moment I Realized It Was Absolutely Over

    In the middle of a relatively civil conversation about our differences, which was making the counselor very happy that we were communicating so well, the to-be ex had an anger explosion and proceeded to scream at me, red-faced and spittle flying, for several minutes. Stunned, mouth open, the counselor and I turned to each other and she said "Ok, I think we're done here".

    I was moved out by the end of the week.

  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    edited September 2011
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    Nogs on
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  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    really Grey Ghost


    not even

    a

    read-through?

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    PARKER, YOU'RE FIRED! <-- My comic book podcast! Satan look here!
  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    holy forum breakage batman!

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  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    Gatsby wrote:
    Skull Man wrote:
    I broke up with my first girlfriend because she lived 45 minutes away

    we both lived twenty minutes outside of town, just, in the opposite directions

    blerg

    This is literally me and my girlfriend right now. We fucking live on opposite sides of the Harbiur Bridge which connects our city together.

    It's annoying as hell but what else can ya do

    45 minutes? There are further distances to cross for relationships y'know. Successful ones.

  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    1226337438romeoandjulie.jpg

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  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    I have to say, I may have scoffed a little at 45 minutes.

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
  • NogsNogs Crap, crap, mega crap. Crap, crap, mega crap.Registered User regular
    WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YOU FORUMS!

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  • Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    hey

    hey henroid

    Skull Man wrote:
    on the other hand my next girlfriend lived 700 miles away for a good while, and we've been together for over six years

    so

  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    MrMonroe wrote:
    I'll tell you what I've been told by a number of people who I've tried to sleep with since my HARGLEBARGLE response to my last relationship have told me:

    "You need to relax"
    i'm relaxed to the point that i'm apathetic

    but really i don't want to even be in a relationship
    i mean i DO because i wanna be with someone but i DON'T because there are a lot of things i'd like to deal with first before i attempt that

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  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    I've been in very few relationships. They are not really my thing and they end spectacularly.

    In high school, I broke up with a girl after she lied to me about a pregnancy. Then a miscarriage. Then a magical miscarriage wherein she was having twins but only miscarried one of the babies. She was a compulsive liar, anyway, but it was kind of entertaining up to that point.

    A few years later, in my only long distance relationship, I broke up with a lady after walking in on her cheating on me after I came out to surprise her on her birthday. I was really offended that not only was she totally cheating on me, but she was ignoring her kid and doing it with her parents just downstairs and pretty much daring someone to notice how horrible she was being.

    Last girlfriend I had broke up with me to leave me for another dude a week before my mom died. Then, the dude broke up with her and now her mom is dying and I feel I have told this story way too much.

    All in all, bitches be crazy

    Well, if I date them that is.

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  • Wrench N RocketsWrench N Rockets Registered User regular
    Just broke up with a lady the other day after just over a month because she smoked way more pot than I was comfortable with. Not really a serious breakup but eh, all I got for now.

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  • BeastehBeasteh THAT WOULD NOT KILL DRACULARegistered User regular
    i dont think im very good at women

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe passed out on the floor nowRegistered User regular
    An acquaintance of mine in high school ended up getting his girlfriend pregnant

    only she was "on birth control" and she refused to tell him about it while she was pregnant so it was a "surprise" when she had a baby and then they felt they needed to get married

    and there's no way this girl could get preggers and you wouldn't notice

    basically she conned the guy into marriage with a baby with his willing help

    so here's us, meeting his baby and smoking weed with him and everything is tremendously awkward and so we leave

    the car ride afterward was super awkward and no one was talking, until I said, "raise your hand if you're glad you're not Tom"

    and everyone raised their hands

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer Scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratchRegistered User regular
    I've only had one girlfriend and therefore only one breakup

    dated her for like a year and a half in high school

    she was kind of clingy and obsessive because she had terrible self-esteem but I didn't mind because I also had terrible self-esteem and appreciated the attention

    My parents didn't like how much time I spent with her and also just generally didn't like her

    Like when we watched Arrested Development together a few years later they laughed extra hard at every Anne joke because "That's exactly how we felt about [this girl]!"

    So eventually they limited me to seeing her once a month (we went to different high schools)

    which obviously didn't make either of us happy and led to lots of arguing and probably would have culminated in us breaking up anyway

    but when my mom overheard a particularly bad phone argument that upset me a lot so she banned me from talking to her at all anymore so I sent her an email explaining the situation and broke up with her

    Big picture, my parents probably did me a favor, because she really did have some problems. I've tried to hang out with her as friends in the years since then and that turned out to pretty much be impossible because every interaction was an incredibly obvious attempt to get back together with me and when they fell through she got super nasty about it. Last I heard she got married at 20.

    But I am not at all happy with the way my parents went about what they did, even if the case could be made that it was for the better. It was years ago now so I don't care that much anymore but every now and then she comes up and they say something really cruel about her and how thank God she's not around anymore and it touches a nerve

  • MateyMatey see, look how sad i am now give me your wallet.Registered User regular
    I broke up with my hand last week

    Now we're just fuck buddies

  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    Skull Man wrote:
    hey

    hey henroid

    Hey Skull Man. 8->

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe passed out on the floor nowRegistered User regular
    I've only had one girlfriend and therefore only one breakup

    dated her for like a year and a half in high school

    she was kind of clingy and obsessive because she had terrible self-esteem but I didn't mind because I also had terrible self-esteem and appreciated the attention

    My parents didn't like how much time I spent with her and also just generally didn't like her

    Like when we watched Arrested Development together a few years later they laughed extra hard at every Anne joke because "That's exactly how we felt about [this girl]!"

    So eventually they limited me to seeing her once a month (we went to different high schools)

    which obviously didn't make either of us happy and led to lots of arguing and probably would have culminated in us breaking up anyway

    but when my mom overheard a particularly bad phone argument that upset me a lot so she banned me from talking to her at all anymore so I sent her an email explaining the situation and broke up with her

    Big picture, my parents probably did me a favor, because she really did have some problems. I've tried to hang out with her as friends in the years since then and that turned out to pretty much be impossible because every interaction was an incredibly obvious attempt to get back together with me and when they fell through she got super nasty about it. Last I heard she got married at 20.

    But I am not at all happy with the way my parents went about what they did, even if the case could be made that it was for the better. It was years ago now so I don't care that much anymore but every now and then she comes up and they say something really cruel about her and how thank God she's not around anymore and it touches a nerve

    ....

    her?

    (not kidding your parents did you a favor that will be impossible for you to recognize)

  • dbrock270dbrock270 Registered User regular
    I don't have girlfriends.

    I have breeding partnerships.

  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    Henroid wrote:
    I've got a few stories to tell. Here's all of them at cursory glance.

    - I've broken up with a girl, my very first technically-girlfriend, via hand-written letter, in highschool.
    - I've been broken up with by my first actual-girlfriend by means of last-minute changes to the senior ball.
    - I've broken up with a girl when posed with a choice to move across the country with her, only to find myself doing so anyway by force.
    - I've been broken up with the day after Christmas in a long-distance relationship, after turning away two very interested girls over the course of the relationship.

    They all have lessons to impart. Except the last, it's still got ongoing baggage. I'll elaborate on any in much greater detail if there's interest. After I've had some sleep.

    First story go. Late tenth grade is the start point.

    I had a very good collection of friends in highschool. There were several clusters of friends of mine that I somehow managed to make gravitate to the same spot for lunch / break times between classes. One of these groups of friends was more or less the giggle-squad, a bunch of girls who were alright but very idealistic on relationships. Not to mention, pushy.

    The girlfriend in question is Jennifer. I'd known her since I first moved to that town in 7th grade, but we never hung out or anything. She was (and still is) very pretty, in that girl-nextdoor way. But that was all I could find in her, so I never made a move on it. I forget how it came up but I'll go with this; one of the giggle squad was asking who I thought was cute or whatever and Jennifer came up. I thought it was a harmless line of questioning on their part. That's when they tell me about the crush she has on me. It was more or less the same level of what I thought of her; just thought I was cute. That's pretty much when the nagging starts to get me to ask Jennifer out. I cave one day and do it.

    Here is what "going out" consisted of with Jennifer; holding hands, walking her to her classes and meeting up with her whenever possible at school, and generally sitting together cuddling. We had no shared interests (she was a book worm, I loved video games). We never kissed, we never did anything together whatsoever. I went to her house twice only. The second time, we were in her room and... did homework. Which I never fucking did in highschool so that was awkward. It was all made worse by school going out into summer. We never saw each other over summer, mostly in part to her and her family going on some long-ass trip together. Also I had a part-time job.

    At the start of 11th grade, things resume as usual. Only, I realize how uneventful, fun, or fulfilling this whole thing is. This is where I make two super dumb decisions. First, I write a break-up letter. Second, when going to my off-campus class for the morning I run into a friend, Brandon, who is dating one of the giggle squad, and have him deliver the letter.

    - Never write breakup letters, they are dumb, even email ones
    - Never use a proxy, oh god that was so shitty of me
    - Never let your friends fucking talk you into who you should be dating

    Incidentally, I'd "stolen" Jennifer away from her usual group of friends at lunch. After the breakup, she hid away for a bit but they managed to find her in the home-ec class which is where they all had lunch together 'til graduation. Oh, and my next girlfriend was part of that clique.

  • Skull ManSkull Man RIP KUSU Registered User regular
    speed it seems like maybe your parents took kind of an uncomfortably firm hand in your relationship

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe passed out on the floor nowRegistered User regular
    I've only had one girlfriend and therefore only one breakup

    dated her for like a year and a half in high school

    she was kind of clingy and obsessive because she had terrible self-esteem but I didn't mind because I also had terrible self-esteem and appreciated the attention

    My parents didn't like how much time I spent with her and also just generally didn't like her

    Like when we watched Arrested Development together a few years later they laughed extra hard at every Anne joke because "That's exactly how we felt about [this girl]!"

    So eventually they limited me to seeing her once a month (we went to different high schools)

    which obviously didn't make either of us happy and led to lots of arguing and probably would have culminated in us breaking up anyway

    but when my mom overheard a particularly bad phone argument that upset me a lot so she banned me from talking to her at all anymore so I sent her an email explaining the situation and broke up with her

    Big picture, my parents probably did me a favor, because she really did have some problems. I've tried to hang out with her as friends in the years since then and that turned out to pretty much be impossible because every interaction was an incredibly obvious attempt to get back together with me and when they fell through she got super nasty about it. Last I heard she got married at 20.

    But I am not at all happy with the way my parents went about what they did, even if the case could be made that it was for the better. It was years ago now so I don't care that much anymore but every now and then she comes up and they say something really cruel about her and how thank God she's not around anymore and it touches a nerve

    ....

    her?

    (not kidding your parents did you a favor that will be impossible for you to recognize)

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer Scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratchRegistered User regular
    MrMonroe wrote:
    I've only had one girlfriend and therefore only one breakup

    dated her for like a year and a half in high school

    she was kind of clingy and obsessive because she had terrible self-esteem but I didn't mind because I also had terrible self-esteem and appreciated the attention

    My parents didn't like how much time I spent with her and also just generally didn't like her

    Like when we watched Arrested Development together a few years later they laughed extra hard at every Anne joke because "That's exactly how we felt about [this girl]!"

    So eventually they limited me to seeing her once a month (we went to different high schools)

    which obviously didn't make either of us happy and led to lots of arguing and probably would have culminated in us breaking up anyway

    but when my mom overheard a particularly bad phone argument that upset me a lot so she banned me from talking to her at all anymore so I sent her an email explaining the situation and broke up with her

    Big picture, my parents probably did me a favor, because she really did have some problems. I've tried to hang out with her as friends in the years since then and that turned out to pretty much be impossible because every interaction was an incredibly obvious attempt to get back together with me and when they fell through she got super nasty about it. Last I heard she got married at 20.

    But I am not at all happy with the way my parents went about what they did, even if the case could be made that it was for the better. It was years ago now so I don't care that much anymore but every now and then she comes up and they say something really cruel about her and how thank God she's not around anymore and it touches a nerve

    ....

    her?

    (not kidding your parents did you a favor that will be impossible for you to recognize)

    yeah I'm not saying that they didn't. I do legitimately think it was for the best

    I was just sore about their methods

  • SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    I had someone break with me for someone else, and then marry her

    Which I suppose is for the best. If you're gonna dump me, it'd better be for The One.

This discussion has been closed.