my strongest memory of losing my virginity like 7 years ago is the brevity of the thing
i think i got all the way inside but i don't really remember
Oh wow. Mine was kind of the opposite, between the condom and being so nervous it took me forever. Like, probably one of the longer times I've actually had sex, a mental thing. Or at least, it felt long. I wasn't actually timing the thing, you know?
I once told a job that I wasn't coming in the last day of my 2 week notice because I was building a snow angel.
Yeah at that point who cares.
She's been doing it for three weeks and has two weeks to go AND is moving exactly one floor up to work in training people to use the software we support.
We have an infuriating ability to hire people here who are really nice and mean well, but just aren't that bright.
I waste more time listening to their inane explanations for simple problems... just... ugh.
HOW DRINK JUICE BOX
I literally just had a conversation where they guy said, "I had the ticket in my hand and then it just wasn't there".
I am supposed to solve this mystery.
I used to have this ticket in my hand, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
So, being the generous fellow I am, I look up the part that was on the ticket... looks like it wasn't available from Vendor1, so we ordered it from Vendor2 as well, as a backup.
Me: "Did the ticket go with the stuff from Vendor2?"
Him: "Well, we did sell one from them, yeah. But I had it with my Vendor1 stuff and then it wasn't there"
Me: "So, we only have the one sale, and you did sell one out of the Vendor2 stuff with a ticket?"
Him: "Yes, but..."
Me: "I DUNNO IT'S A MYSTERY"
I'm going to post an email exchange I had, because we are living the same hell.
Subj: Viewing multiple Excel spreadsheets side by side
The way I've found to do this is to begin by opening one of the spreadsheets you want to view. Then, go to Start--> Microsoft Excel 2007 and click that (not the other file you want). It will open a new copy of Excel. From inside the new window, open the second spreadsheet you wanted to view.
No working for me!
Plan B?
There is no plan B... that's how you do it.
Open a document. Minimize Excel.
Start a new instance of Excel... not a new document, but just a blank workbook, by clicking on Start --> Microsoft Excel. You should have a second window of Excel open now.
I did not get a reply. Later, she says to me "hey, we figured out that excel thing". I wanted to scream THERE WAS NOTHING TO FIGURE OUT YOU FIGURED NOTHING YOU JUST FOLLOWED MY DIRECTIONS but instead I just said "oh, good!" and walked on.
I'm just messing. I don't really like zero or diet, I get all the deliciously bad for you calories. I think honestly it's whatever taste you get used to. Regular, diet and zero all have a unique flavor profile.
0
VariableMouth CongressStroke Me Lady FameRegistered Userregular
SarksusATTACK AND DETHRONE GODRegistered Userregular
Thanatos, I've never used a local bookstore because they're tiny and the chains have terrible selection at times to begin with and I don't have any attachment to my Barnes and Noble outside of the sweet members card because I just go there for a book and then leave.
I once told a job that I wasn't coming in the last day of my 2 week notice because I was building a snow angel.
Yeah at that point who cares.
She's been doing it for three weeks and has two weeks to go AND is moving exactly one floor up to work in training people to use the software we support.
I have burned so many bridges. But in my defense, they basically lied to me, and being a stupid kid I didn't get it in writing. Hur hur of course I'll believe your word that I'll be getting a raise to what I asked for in a month after my trial period.
not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
Posts
It was a magically evening.
Me!
I get them for PMs and @ mentions, but that's it, it seems.
finally, every stall in every publically accessible bathroom in this library has been pooped in by me
achievement earned
Oh wow. Mine was kind of the opposite, between the condom and being so nervous it took me forever. Like, probably one of the longer times I've actually had sex, a mental thing. Or at least, it felt long. I wasn't actually timing the thing, you know?
How...how do you not know.
You should make a badge.
Yessssss. For christmas I am getting a moka pot and I am going to learn how to make cuban coffee and experiment and it is going to be the bestest.
But I don't really know anything about coffee.
*sips diet coke*
the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
everyone knows a breast feels like a bag of sand
In a row?
the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
Switch to zero dog. Fuck up that 1 calorie.
at once
I could do that
what's the limit for posting a .gif?
i remember heat and tightness and
i mean i got in there but i don't even think i finished the first stroke and it was like kapow!
but there was foreplay too, so
I keep getting massive, page-spanning notification boxes filled with gibberish that link me to the first page of whatever thread I'm reading.
I should probably make a thread in the Vanilla forum.
Got any nearby bowling alleys?
Three times.
I don't like coke zero.
the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
Yeah at that point who cares.
She's been doing it for three weeks and has two weeks to go AND is moving exactly one floor up to work in training people to use the software we support.
QEDMF xbl: PantsB G+
Yeah, that doesn't sound like intended functionality :P
I'm going to post an email exchange I had, because we are living the same hell.
I did not get a reply. Later, she says to me "hey, we figured out that excel thing". I wanted to scream THERE WAS NOTHING TO FIGURE OUT YOU FIGURED NOTHING YOU JUST FOLLOWED MY DIRECTIONS but instead I just said "oh, good!" and walked on.
I'm just messing. I don't really like zero or diet, I get all the deliciously bad for you calories. I think honestly it's whatever taste you get used to. Regular, diet and zero all have a unique flavor profile.
Online chick, from another state.... no one believed me when I bragged about it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vn3IRHhPXMo
totally NSFW.
How long did you save up your allowance for that one
does
this mean your first sex experience did have crossbows?
Because I know how you are about those
But, also, people are so dumb!
I have burned so many bridges. But in my defense, they basically lied to me, and being a stupid kid I didn't get it in writing. Hur hur of course I'll believe your word that I'll be getting a raise to what I asked for in a month after my trial period.
Look, I don't want to get into details...but...someone lost an eye.
'and then i'd be nailing her..'
'oh, shit'