Coping with Steam: Artistic Commentary on Our Shared Affliction
Most Frequently Asked Questions
1. Steam's search tool is cumbersome and not very informative. Is there a website, other than Steam's, I can go to find out what's on sale?
2. Can I register this copy of (Insert Game Here) on Steam?
Here's a list of games you can register on Steam. You can always add a non-Steam game to your Steam games list, so that people can see you playing it. You can also use this to add your own shortcuts with fake names to your Steam games list to make it look like you're playing Episode 3. Hilarious, right?
3. If I buy a game pack that already includes a game I own, can I gift that game?
Not usually. You're welcome to ask in this thread, although if you Google it it'll probably be answered even faster. Valve games are typically the only packs that let you do this, and even then it sometimes doesn't work.
4. Why isn't {Insert Game Here} available in my horrible little corner of the earth?
Many Steam games might be unavailable in your country if you have the temerity to live outside of the United States. This is not Steam's fault. Regional game availability is determined solely by the publisher, who should be the source of your ire. Gifting works regardless of region so you might find some helpful person in North America who can gift you the game. This very thread is a great place to ask!
5. How do I get an invite to the Penny Arcade Steam group?
The most convenient way is to just post a link to your Steam profile page (getting one of the swank signatures described below makes it easy) and ask for an invite. Just as a word of advice, we tend to prefer that you be a regular contributor to get an invite to the group. The rule of thumb is 6 months of activity on the forums. We are well known for our generosity, and like to make sure any new additions are here for the good of the community, and not to leech during sales. That said, we're a friendly group, so make yourself at home and start posting and you'll be there in no time!
Some Words on Gifting
If you receive a game or pack via a gift or a contest,
remember to thank that person either through a PM or by announcing it in the thread.
This is not optional. We are classy gentlemen and will act as such.
Steam's new gifting features allow you to store up games in your gift bank when you purchase them, instead of having to email yourself the gift link. It'll be an option during checkout.
A few things to remember as a giftee:
1. Make it possible to track you from PA Forums to Steam. A link directly to your steam ID is usually the most convenient. Remember, your Steam ID is different than your steam name. If you just include text to your steam name, we have to search and scroll through 5 pages to find you (and we may not find you if you're not using the same name/avatar combo!).
2. Make it possible to track you from Steam to PA Forums. Best bet is using similar avatar/name. Understandably, some people don't want to do that. In that case, you should have "I'm ______ on Penny Arcade Forums!" in your profile blurb.
Generally speaking, if you're selected for a gift from a stranger on here it will be, usually, one of two ways:
You will either post in the thread (so they will go to your profile to friend you and then to the store to send a gift.
—or—
Someone will want to gift a certain game and go to the store page where you can see everyone who has it on their wishlist.
Also, remember that a gifter can see when you added a game to your wishlist. If you add it on the day of the sale, you might have a smaller chance of being gifted it than someone who has been interested in it since release. Gifters should also make sure they are identifiable from Steam to PA Forums. Some people are shy and are too nervous to message a gifter and say "hey thanks, I have no idea who you are on forums!"
An Important Word on Contests
If you decide to run or participate in a giveaway contest for gift copies of games, please remember that all entry submissions must now be made via PM. The forum mods have stated that pages of the thread being filled with pictures, videos, etc. submitted as contest entries will lead to such contests being banned. So please, for the sake of the thread – take it to PMs.
Helpful Stuff
Steam Mover
Does your Steam library have 800 games? Do you wish you could move some of those games to different hard drives instead of deleting them entirely and then downloading them again when you want to play them?
Steam Mover is here for you.
Steam Price Guide
Do you have the misfortune to live somewhere other than America? Steam hates you! Luckily,
this cool website with prices for Steam games all around the world is here to help, so you can know if you want to ask an American friend to buy the game for you or not. Hint: you probably do.
AussiesYou need this program.
It reconfigures your Windows IPSEC settings (run it as an admin) to block out all but the servers which don't count towards your download quota on Steam. Now supports a bunch of ISPs through a graphical interface.
Basically guarantees you won't add to your download quota with Steam.
Also: Download TCPview:
TCPView
Then, use TCPview to close all Steam TCP servers (this is important, NOT the UDP ones, just the TCP ones). Steam will then reconnect to a different server, which will hopefully get you a better speed. If you don't go faster in a couple of seconds, retry until you get a speed you like.
I've also been told you Aussies might want to try
Angus Wolfcastle's SteamManager. Setting it up is easy is you follow the instructions
here. If you find you're still being charged for your steam downloads, try changing the setting like in
this link here.
Cool Community Add-Ons
Steam Signatures
With such a cool service, someone must have done some extra things to build on it. The forums have one such man, who made some super cool Steam signatures.
Suds is his name and killing is his game. Except for the killing. The signatures automatically use backgrounds for the games and the correct icon. Pretty neat, and they're 100% free!
Sample signature:
Steam Calculator
You can also use a script on
his Steam Calculator page to see how much your Steam account would be worth if you had taken advantage of some obscure, arcane combination of special deals that nobody could ever have taken advantage of. Or something sort of like that.
Steam Roulette
Having trouble picking a game out of your burgeoning [strike]backlog[/strike] gamebank to play? Let VicWhiten's
Steam Roulette decide! Just type in your Steam community ID (easier if you set up a custom URL on your Steam profile page), and Steam Roulette will read your library and randomly pick one game every time you hit "Spin the Wheel!" It even connects to Steam to allow you to install or start the game with a single click.
What's all this about serving "The Newell?"
It started with this comic:
And now it is our unofficial official motto.
And now, for your amusement, comic edits!
//
@HiT BiT made the crab because he is our God-King
Posts
It has been a long time since I've been called a Mexican Jew Lizard, perhaps it's time to venture back into the wild.
steam | xbox live: IGNORANT HARLOT | psn: MadRoll | nintendo network: spinach
3ds: 1504-5717-8252
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Nobody buy Stronghold 3. Holy fucking shit is that a terrible shitty pile of anal seepage.
Wow HiT BiT, I'm honored. Thank you.
Also, the credit card I was using at that time has expired now, so I should be good.
Still, good to know. I'll be keeping any eye out.
I don't even know
I asked Multivac if it could calculate your level of classiness and the damn thing exploded into leather shoes, caviar, coinpurses, and the most exquisite silk ties. It then said it had insufficient capabilities for a meaningful answer, and then shut itself down.
It's a beautiful thing, isn't it?
So I should be good.
MotS had such a steep jump in difficulty once you got to the last planet. I finished it when it first came out but on my playthrough 3 years ago I abandoned it on one of the last 2 levels.
Steam ID: Good Life
Also, it's Friday. This makes me happy. I would like to share my happy happy joy joys with you Steamonites. Thus, I am giving away a copy of;
Space Marine - pretty simple, just drop me a PM with one of your favourite (none offensive) words.
and
Serious Sam Pack (The Random Encounter, Double D, The First Encounter, The Second Encounter - also none Steam versions of Kamikaze Attack, and The Greek Encounter - pretty simple again, drop me a PM with one of your favourite invectives, what would you utter as the alien horde descends upon you and you pull the trigger of you favourite gun only to hear *click*.
Enter for either or both. This being PA I expect some random responses so please state which your entry pertains to, or if both, which word is for which game.
I'll ping them out Sunday morning GMT. Get enwordenating.
GW2: Tavalisk.9463
steam | xbox live: IGNORANT HARLOT | psn: MadRoll | nintendo network: spinach
3ds: 1504-5717-8252
This reminds me, we gotta get some Serious Sam co-op going again sometime.
Twitter: busfahrer -- Quake Live: busfahrer -- StarCraft II: busfahrer.184 (EU)
Ahem
They're called "cravats."
Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
Ah, a recruitment for more initiates to our chapter. Well played .
You've classed TOO DEEP. PULL BACK.
Indeed. Service to the Emperor is its own reward. You are wealthy today.
In the long distant future, after man has died, and as the last stars in the whole of creation blink out of existence, Classivac continued to calculate. Continued to amass the data, in its pocket dimension safe from the death of the universe.
Unfathomable time passed, Until Classivac finally was done with its calculations, its data correlation, and its analysis. It had reached an answer, But with no being in all of existence to give its answer to, It did the only thing it could and created demonstration of its answer.
In a brilliant burst of light, Life filled the empty void, Stars erupted in spectacular fashion and coalesced the cosmic debris around them into planets.
And on one very special little planet, It gave its answer.
It created the steam thread, an Eternal Monument to its diligent search for the ultimate answer.
Drake is wise in his ways
Twitter: busfahrer -- Quake Live: busfahrer -- StarCraft II: busfahrer.184 (EU)
I appreciate the reference. [/Q]
NintendoID: Nailbunny 3DS: 3909-8796-4685
If we get enough regulars of SM (And perhaps Retribution), I think we should make our own chapter and legion with custom skins.
Chapter names: The Arcadians, The Class Marines, the Top Hat Marines.
Legion names: Children of Newell, Daily Deal Bearers, and such.
OH GOD THAT CRAB
My day just went from "I'm on 4 hours of sleep and everything is terrible" to "Cheerio, gents! I say, shall we have a rousing game of Payday?"
Sadly I raid tonight and cannot actually play Payday with people, but that is a separate issue.
I gotta start playing this soon too, count me in
Games: Ad Astra Per Phalla | Choose Your Own Phalla
Wrong kind of raid!!
Steam ID: Obos Vent: Obos
this... seems like a reasonable way to serve the newell. please advise.
Think of it this way - While there is glory in serving The Newell, do you really wish to encourage the inclusion of Hats to future Valve games?
Perhaps your $10 would be better spent elsewhere, dare I suggest some Train Simulator 2012 DLC?
If we get enough regulars of SM (And perhaps Retribution), I think we should make our own chapter and legion with custom skins.
Chapter names: The Arcadians, The Class Marines, the Top Hat Marines.
Legion names: Children of Newell, Daily Deal Bearers, and such
Star Wars: Dark Forces
This is one of the greatest FPS games ever made. It's easily up there with DooM, Duke Nukem 3d, Marathon, and all those other awesome games (Heretic, Hexen, Blood, etc.) I would say that it's better than DooM and about as good as Duke Nukem 3d. In any case it does tremendous things and it was the first to do a number of them. I played it through a month or two ago and it was tons of fun. Cannot recommend enough for $1.24 if you at all enjoy oldschool games, first person shooters, Star Wars, or all three.
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II
Dark Forces was a groundbreaking game that did everything extremely well. Dark Forces II kicked it up a notch. A story that doesn't suck, FMV sequences that are actually pretty good as far as these things go, absolutely massive levels, spectacular shooting, force powers, and a lightsaber that hasn't been equaled since, I'd say. You kill pretty much everyone with one slice, and often arms or heads go flying. If you only buy one game on sale, grab this one.
Star Wars Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II: Mysteries of the Sith
Played the demo for this and liked it, so I bought it during the winter sale but I haven't played it (almost done playing through Dark Forces II, though). I'd say grab it.
Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Dark Forces III: Jedi Outcast
Outcast is pretty great. The first few levels are a little too faithful to the older Dark Forces games, because they're stupid key hunts in Imperial bases which fail to realize that the gunplay isn't as fun, but once you get the lightsaber things get pretty awesome. Kyle Katarn makes a pretty good Jedi Knight and the saber battles in this are off the hook. The main antagonist is a dinosaur man. A very fun Star Wars experience that I can certainly recommend.
Star Wars Jedi Knight III: Dark Force IV: Jedi Outcast II: Jedi Academy
Basically Jedi Outcast + goodies. You can dual wield sabers or wield a saber staff, and chill with Chewbacca or whatever. If you like Jedi Outcast and want more, this game will not disappoint. It's nothing special but if you're a Star Wars fan you'll have fun. Bonus: you choose your character's race, and if you pick some of the aliens, it looks pretty ridiculous when you talk with a normal voice in the cutscenes.
Can you imagine how many hats they could fit in DOTA2? I don't think you can.
You probably wont have to imagine once it's out!
I am considering getting Jedi Outcast or Jedi Academy mainly for the multiplayer. Is it still alive? I suppose most of the people playing online will be in Academy, right?
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