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PA Comic: Monday, February 20th - Firebird

StericaSterica YesRegistered User, Moderator mod
edited February 2012 in The Penny Arcade Hub
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Most enthusiast gamers “get” Angry Birds almost immediately, and move on. For those outside our order - that is to say, the vast majority of bipedal sentients - the ubiquitous Angry Birds is one of the first opportunities to understand what their children are always on about re: vijamagames. It’s ridiculously easy to get and subsequently play, made so by the fact that even my grandparents carry around portable touchscreen computers with perpetual access to the dataverse. This is something even a life ass-deep in science fiction did not prepare me for.

These games also introduce these neophytes to the concept of downloadable content, free and paid, which only feeds the demon furnace of their addiction. They don’t know they’re on something “soft,” they aren’t aware that they’re at the bottom of the roller coaster. They’re just doing something fun, at a chronojuncture where “something fun” often has a digital component.

It was weird! Playing videogames used to be weird. There was a point where spending your time in this way had strictly Morlock connotations. My mom used to worry about what she called my “spirit man,” my spirit man, simply because I kept my curtains closed for weeks at a time in an effort to maintain proper monitor contrast! Maybe it was more the isolation and esoteric knowledge requirements of early gaming that brought with them the attendant subterranean cache, as opposed to the strict form. And now, with a game on a phone, you could conceivably play it anywhere. You aren’t limited exclusively to the bulbous cap of some deep mushroom.

Rovio announced Angry Birds Space, which seems like a strange place to host their customary revels, because inertia. But they’re the ones who have the Earth lodged in their jagged beak, and I’m the one whose job it is to talk about what they do. So, maybe they win this round.

I’ll be gone on Wednesday, and we wrote the strip ahead, but I’ve got a guest to take care of you post-wise. See you Friday. Or earlier, if you will be at Disneyland also.

(CW)TB out.

don’t you waste no time

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Sterica on
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Posts

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    This comic is brilliant. I love the expression on the birds face in panel 2.

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Grandma Winky's fat ankles Registered User regular
    edited February 2012
  • GaslightGaslight Registered User regular
    If only all Angry Birds could be launched into the sun.

  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    Are we gonna get to hear people talk about how much they hate Angry Birds and its success, now?

  • GaslightGaslight Registered User regular
    Maybe. Is that a problem?

    I wasn't really being serious. The cash cow milking of Angry Birds annoys me slightly, and I think it's been more successful than it deserves on its merits, but I don't particularly care that much.

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    okay good so then we don't need to do that thing then

    instead we can be like

    this comic is funny

    also Angry Birds is pretty great

  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    The theme song is stuck in my head. And I laughed.

  • HenroidHenroid Mexican kicked from Immigration Thread Centrism is Racism :3Registered User regular
    This could've ended on panel 5 and be even more hilarious.

  • The Dude With HerpesThe Dude With Herpes Lehi, UTRegistered User regular
    Good lord someone with skills animate the comic for the entirety of that Dead Island trailer theme. Most of it could just be the bird floating through space. It would be glorious and depressing and wonderful.

    Steam: Galedrid - XBL: Galedrid - PSN: Galedrid
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  • Peter EbelPeter Ebel CopenhagenRegistered User regular
    Henroid wrote:
    This could've ended on panel 5 and be even more hilarious.

    Agreed.

    Fuck off and die.
  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    I like Angry Birds.

    EXCEPT FOR SEASON'S GREETINGS LEVEL 1-17!

    FUCK THAT LEVEL. THREE STARRING THAT LEVEL IS BULLSHIT AND I'M AN IDIOT FOR DOING IT.

    FUCK YOU 1-17!

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • AurichAurich ArizonaRegistered User regular
    You can see in the bird's face that it knows it made a mistake. Maybe it should have just calmed down for one fucking second and thought about the consequences of its actions.

    At any rate, by the time it happened to run into a star, it would be well ready for it all to end... nowait.. that's the sad music is affecting me...

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    heh, the star fields in 2 and 3, and 4 and 5, are the same, just mirrored.

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  • G0DG0D Registered User regular
    Aurich wrote:
    At any rate, by the time it happened to run into a star, it would be well ready for it all to end.

    Yeah, but as evidence in panel 5, the bird dies before ever burning up in the grip of a star.

    He did last a while, though!

  • DextolenDextolen Registered User regular
    Milking the cash cow? At .99 a download, with what, 4 games so far (Angry Birds, Seasons, Rio and now Space). With the eagle, that's about $5 max per avid player.

    Anyway, love panel 2.

  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Well, there's also all the plushes, and shirts, and pencil cases and whatnot.

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  • rockmonkeyrockmonkey Little RockRegistered User regular
    Dextolen wrote:
    Milking the cash cow? At .99 a download, with what, 4 games so far (Angry Birds, Seasons, Rio and now Space). With the eagle, that's about $5 max per avid player.

    Anyway, love panel 2.

    I was thinking more along the lines of all the merchandise and other crap that was/is everywhere. Does your dog really need an Angry Birds chew toy? Do you really want to have a hardshell back for your iPad/iPhone that's Angry Birds?

    I think a lot of the big console games go a little overboard with their merch, but Angry Birds is out of proportion.

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  • PenumbraPenumbra Registered User regular
    This comic is wonderful, in every single way.

    Also, I don't own Angry Birds: Seasons yet. Is it worth it?

    Switch Friend Code: 6359-7575-9391
  • zepherinzepherin Russian warship, go fuck yourself Registered User regular
    Funny comic, but I get the feeling they phoned it in this time. I kind of hope they did a PATV on it just so I can see if they did.

  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    That bird's name?

    Jubal Early-Bird

  • TubeTube Registered User admin
    rockmonkey wrote:
    Dextolen wrote:
    Milking the cash cow? At .99 a download, with what, 4 games so far (Angry Birds, Seasons, Rio and now Space). With the eagle, that's about $5 max per avid player.

    Anyway, love panel 2.

    I was thinking more along the lines of all the merchandise and other crap that was/is everywhere. Does your dog really need an Angry Birds chew toy? Do you really want to have a hardshell back for your iPad/iPhone that's Angry Birds?

    I think a lot of the big console games go a little overboard with their merch, but Angry Birds is out of proportion.

    They should make as much money out of it as they can. That's what a business is.

  • bedlampuhedronbedlampuhedron Registered User new member
    Penumbra wrote:
    Also, I don't own Angry Birds: Seasons yet. Is it worth it?

    Yes, I think so! Many of the levels are quite difficult. If you're gonna skip a version, skip Angry Birds: Rio

  • KalTorakKalTorak One way or another, they all end up in the Undercity.Registered User regular
    rockmonkey wrote:
    Dextolen wrote:
    Milking the cash cow? At .99 a download, with what, 4 games so far (Angry Birds, Seasons, Rio and now Space). With the eagle, that's about $5 max per avid player.

    Anyway, love panel 2.

    I was thinking more along the lines of all the merchandise and other crap that was/is everywhere. Does your dog really need an Angry Birds chew toy? Do you really want to have a hardshell back for your iPad/iPhone that's Angry Birds?

    I think a lot of the big console games go a little overboard with their merch, but Angry Birds is out of proportion.

    They should make as much money out of it as they can. That's what a business is.

    Plus it seems like original IP franchises are a rarity these days. It's nice to see one succeed; it can only mean more attention and potential investment for other games and franchises, now that Angry Birds has shown that it's a viable business.

  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Grandma Winky's fat ankles Registered User regular
    I'm all for people making money on consumer goods. I mean, raking people over the coals and price gouging for essentials like apples or diabetes medication is one thing.

    But if the public wants to buy squeaky toys for their dog and t-shirts and DLC from you, then grab that brass ring!

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  • wonderpugwonderpug Registered User regular
    Well, there's also all the plushes, and shirts, and pencil cases and whatnot.

    Just saw Angry Birds fruit snacks in the drug store yesterday.

  • SyphyreSyphyre A Dangerous Pastime Registered User regular
    Totally, if the public wants to consume all this Angry Birds stuff, then by all means. I have no issue against it.

    Nor against most things they commercialize, I mean sure it may be hip to say "But I liked it before." Tough, it's business.

    With exceptions like what Margarazzi said.;

  • Fatty McBeardoFatty McBeardo Registered User regular
    This comic should be read while listening to Clint Mansell's "The Last Man" from the soundtrack to The Fountain.

  • GyralGyral Registered User regular
    edited February 2012
    I'm all for the Angry Birds people cashing in. Hell if this is their "15 minutes" and not a sustainable resource, they need to cash grab as hard and as fast as their hands will allow.

    Gyral on
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  • jwalkjwalk Registered User regular
    I laughed so hard at this. Utterly brilliant.

    A+++++ would read again.

  • oddbilloddbill Registered User regular
    KalTorak wrote:
    That bird's name?

    Jubal Early-Bird

    I would like to take a moment to appreciate this nicely deployed reference.

    Yes.

    That was good.


  • lindethierlindethier Registered User regular
    Good lord someone with skills animate the comic for the entirety of that Dead Island trailer theme. Most of it could just be the bird floating through space. It would be glorious and depressing and wonderful.

    This ^

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  • Roger WilcoRoger Wilco Registered User regular
    Since Gabe updated the newspost to talk about PA report being added to the main page, I can use this topic to talk about the main page's layout! Yay!!

    I'm loving the brand bar at the top of the page. But I feel like the rest of the site is so cluttered. That huge box that scrolls through recent updates is too big, and the PA Report at the bottom seems out place, and makes the page messier. I understand they need to give you this stuff upfront but I wish it was maybe a little more streamlined.

    Also, the comic was great.

  • Lord_AsmodeusLord_Asmodeus goeticSobriquet: Here is your magical cryptic riddle-tumour: I AM A TIME MACHINERegistered User regular

    YES

    I LOVE YOU

    was so going to post this.

    Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if Labor had not first existed. Labor is superior to capital, and deserves much the higher consideration. - Lincoln
  • -SPI--SPI- Osaka, JapanRegistered User regular
    My only problem with angry birds is that it was from the start a huge ripoff of Crush the Castle.

  • Erix The RedErix The Red Registered User regular
    My frames didn’t load correctly today thus turning an otherwise cute comic about physics into a much darker (though funnier) one about advertising, its pervasiveness, and the low opinion it has for life. Y4v6U.png

  • admanbadmanb unionize your workplace Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    That's fantastic.

  • KoopahTroopahKoopahTroopah The koopas, the troopas. Philadelphia, PARegistered User regular
    They're overdue on a merch comic. That photo made me realize this.

  • jwalkjwalk Registered User regular
    edited February 2012
    yea I hate when people make awesome games then give them away for free.
    Aurich wrote:
    You can see in the bird's face that it knows it made a mistake. Maybe it should have just calmed down for one fucking second and thought about the consequences of its actions.

    At any rate, by the time it happened to run into a star, it would be well ready for it all to end... nowait.. that's the sad music is affecting me...

    Actually it can't not hit a star, eventually. Space is full of stars. Even if it missed every star in the universe, it would eventually be pulled back again towards the center of the universe and probably hit a star. If not it would swing around for another try.. then another.. then another.. ad infinitum. Eventually it would hit a star. It's full of stars.

    jwalk on
  • SabreMauSabreMau ネトゲしよう 판다리아Registered User regular
    Would a black hole be still considered a star? Bird could hit one of those instead.

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