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The Dating Game (aka the Rules)
Sarcastro
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Do I play the game? No. Well, not really.
But I'm being gamed. Deliberately. It's an old classic;
meet on the weekend,
get in touch early in the next week,
go for weekday drinks
go for the Sunday early eve drink
get set up for the weekend date.
So according to my dating watch it's almost relationship o'clock. I can't remember the rest of the progression though. Is there one? I'd like to be one step ahead here. It's like there's a ritual here in play, and I have no idea what the rules are for it.
But I'm being gamed. Deliberately. It's an old classic;
meet on the weekend,
get in touch early in the next week,
go for weekday drinks
go for the Sunday early eve drink
get set up for the weekend date.
So according to my dating watch it's almost relationship o'clock. I can't remember the rest of the progression though. Is there one? I'd like to be one step ahead here. It's like there's a ritual here in play, and I have no idea what the rules are for it.
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You should relax more. Just go with the flow.
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The steps so far have been outright Cosmo in thier application, so for sure there's something that should be done on our next date. I'd like to anticipate that idea, that setting, and make it something special.
For sure the floor is also open for non-drinking activities in a public place, big city style.
If you really want to know what she wants or is looking for the only way your going to find out is by asking her.
That list seems like a pretty slow pace, be more fluid, take her to a party or concert, don't plan so much, just call her up one day and ask if she has time to hang out and then take her to the zoo or some shit.
The zoo is an good place to get to know a person, but by the looks of your previous dates and all the "go for drinks" stuff you should know everything about her by now.
Have you met her friends? Has she met your friends? I agree that if she's doing this Cosmo style there is going to be some silly guidelines that she wants to follow and trying to push her out of them might frazzle her a bit.
I'm going to guess that the next thing you do should be kind of casual. Beer with friends on a sunny day, beach volleyball, or going to a ball game. But my guess is that you're into the get-to-know-the-friends territory.
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Plan every day for the rest of your relationship's life? Does this girl always need time to prepare?
Just looking for flags.
WHOA, there, Tecumseh!
Not every relationship starts the same way. I've been in a "relationship" after one date. I've dated for 6 months and never even approached "relationship".
This is part of the problem with the way society organizes itself, it's not always that simple. Human nature requires that we look for patterns, but at the end of the day instict is chaotic. There is no "relationship" until both parties tacitly agree and largely there it's agreed upon before it's even spoken. Typically speaking in my experience before a "relationship" can begin (and you'll notice the heavy use of quotation marks around the word in every case) one meets her/his friends and he/she meets your friends in a casual, public setting. If one rule is going to be applied... that's it.
...
Oh, god... I have a pattern. Fuck sakes!
-Robert E. Howard
Tower of the Elephant
Interestingly enough, she does know almost all my friends, at least casually - thats how we met. A sort of intersecting circles kind of a thing. But the casual hangout - definately. That feels right somehow. I'll put something together. Right on.