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Star Trek is Our Business

194959799100

Posts

  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    hehe, SFDebris' mirror universe episode review has a goatee'd Janeway as a peaceful mild-mannered nerd.

    sig.gif
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    dlinfiniti wrote: »
    fuck that shit
    whenever i want advice i go to neelix
    he has such wide array of knowledge from engineering to medicine to tactics

    Well, at least you'd know what not to do.

  • ArchonexArchonex No hard feelings, right? Registered User regular
    edited March 2012
    So I never went through DS9 from start to finish, and i'm doing that now.

    I just watched that episode where the false emissary shows up through time travel in DS9 after he was injured, and the Prophets took him into the wormhole to save his life some 200 years ago.

    That entire scene with Sisko and the false emissary in the Celestial Temple was unintentional hilarity. Starting from the moment when the prophets take on the form of the other crew members, and do the "stilted, floaty acting" thing.

    Loved the part where they finally managed to get everyone on the same page after struggling to make the Prophets make sense, and the Prophets struggling to figure out what the fuck is going on and why these goddamn humanoids are loitering in the wormhole. Sisko asks why the fake emissary was truly sent here. Kira Prophet looks back to Jadzia Prophet, who looks back to Bashir Prophet, who looks back to Odo Prophet, who just kind of subtly gives a "Why the fuck would I know?" stare back at them all.

    Even in Prophet form, Odo is still a dick.

    This is followed by them basically saying "Yeah, oops. Sorry, we don't get this whole linear time thing quite well yet.".

    This is followed by the emotional breakdown of said fake Emissary who thought he was doing the will of his gods by setting Bajoran society back 200 years, having (presumably) mass murders occur or would occur in the future if Bajorans wouldn't take to the caste system from then, and was totally willing too, at the end of his plan, lock people up or have them killed if they didn't stay in a strict "You are better then I am." type caste hierarchy, to the point where he was confident that the hero of the Cardassian Occupuation, a farmer that was elected to Prime Space Minister earlier in the show was going to be voted back out and forced into being a farmer due to the caste system (And it seemed he was.).


    The sheer levels of unintentional dickery in the entire exchange are great.

    Archonex on
  • mrt144mrt144 King of the Numbernames Registered User regular
    Riker as a proto vulcan...jesus christ.

  • JelloJelloJelloJello Registered User regular
    edited March 2012
    I don't mean to be crude by any of this, but it's all Star Trek-related.

    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage. I hid it in a drawer along with a newspaper's tv listings magazine that had Dolly Parton on the cover and a Naomi Campbell milk ad.

    In this day and age, having a hidden barely-porn stash seems positively quaint. And Star Trek barely-porn at that.

    Although, this reminds me of genuine Star Trek porn. Anyone ever see this stuff? I know it's not canon but some of it is actually pretty good.

    For me, Sex Trek III: The Wrath of Bob (1992) has a special place in my heart. I remember watching it on the Spice Channel through all the wavy lines. Dominique Simone was amazing as Uwhore. And Mike Horner had some funny moments as Mr Sperm.

    I haven't really seen much of the other Star Trek porn parodies. I know that they've done some Next Generation ones. Not sure about DS9, Voyager or Enterprise. There's a lot of great potential for porn parody in the Star Trek universe but you need a reasonable budget. In today's world of gonzo porn, perhaps there's no place for big budget productions anymore. But I still hold out for Borg gangbangs.

    JelloJello on
  • autono-wally, erotibot300autono-wally, erotibot300 love machine Registered User regular
    Edd wrote: »
    emp123 wrote: »
    20 years of Star Trek is a lot of Star Trek.

    Although I think theres been enough time between shows that Id be willing to watch a new series, if the premise was good enough.

    I sort of wonder what Trek has left to accomplish, artistically. I mean, basically all of Next Generation was a purified, concentrated version of the original series - exploring various ethical problems common to us in an allegory-filled future. We had seven years of that, plus three more series that tried to achieve the same damned thing, albeit with various levels of commitment to the "copy next gen" mentality.

    I would watch a "Lower Decks" style show, though - stories focused on the every day, working types aboard a starship, and how they get to experience the insane, awe-inspiring adventures of the senior staff.
    you can still habe that basic concept, because it is a good concept and works.
    it's not as if there are no ethical problems left today, is it?
    I mean, enterprise DID try to incorporate real events obviously (what with the attack on earth..) but it was done so so poorly

    kFJhXwE.jpgkFJhXwE.jpg
  • autono-wally, erotibot300autono-wally, erotibot300 love machine Registered User regular
    JelloJello wrote: »
    I don't mean to be crude by any of this, but it's all Star Trek-related.

    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage. I hid it in a drawer along with a newspaper's tv listings magazine that had Dolly Parton on the cover and a Naomi Campbell milk ad.

    In this day and age, having a hidden barely-porn stash seems positively quaint. And Star Trek barely-porn at that.

    Although, this reminds me of genuine Star Trek porn. Anyone ever see this stuff? I know it's not canon but some of it is actually pretty good.

    For me, Sex Trek III: The Wrath of Bob (1992) has a special place in my heart. I remember watching it on the Spice Channel through all the wavy lines. Dominique Simone was amazing as Uwhore. And Mike Horner had some funny moments as Mr Sperm.

    I haven't really seen much of the other Star Trek porn parodies. I know that they've done some Next Generation ones. Not sure about DS9, Voyager or Enterprise. There's a lot of great potential for porn parody in the Star Trek universe but you need a reasonable budget. In today's world of gonzo porn, perhaps there's no place for big budget productions anymore. But I still hold out for Borg gangbangs.
    this post.. I am not sure what to think about it.#
    But look at this trailer:
    It's awesome. Apparently the director and some of the porn actors were big fans themselves. If you took out the porn.. and the bad hairpiece..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14IY-PreyW0

    kFJhXwE.jpgkFJhXwE.jpg
  • autono-wally, erotibot300autono-wally, erotibot300 love machine Registered User regular
    I ALWAYS completely lose it at 0:45

    kFJhXwE.jpgkFJhXwE.jpg
  • Casually HardcoreCasually Hardcore Once an Asshole. Trying to be better. Registered User regular
    edited March 2012
    That trailer is better then 2/3 of all star trek movies.

    Casually Hardcore on
  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    JelloJello wrote: »
    I don't mean to be crude by any of this, but it's all Star Trek-related.

    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage. I hid it in a drawer along with a newspaper's tv listings magazine that had Dolly Parton on the cover and a Naomi Campbell milk ad.

    In this day and age, having a hidden barely-porn stash seems positively quaint. And Star Trek barely-porn at that.

    Although, this reminds me of genuine Star Trek porn. Anyone ever see this stuff? I know it's not canon but some of it is actually pretty good.

    For me, Sex Trek III: The Wrath of Bob (1992) has a special place in my heart. I remember watching it on the Spice Channel through all the wavy lines. Dominique Simone was amazing as Uwhore. And Mike Horner had some funny moments as Mr Sperm.

    I haven't really seen much of the other Star Trek porn parodies. I know that they've done some Next Generation ones. Not sure about DS9, Voyager or Enterprise. There's a lot of great potential for porn parody in the Star Trek universe but you need a reasonable budget. In today's world of gonzo porn, perhaps there's no place for big budget productions anymore. But I still hold out for Borg gangbangs.
    this post.. I am not sure what to think about it.#
    But look at this trailer:
    It's awesome. Apparently the director and some of the porn actors were big fans themselves. If you took out the porn.. and the bad hairpiece..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14IY-PreyW0

    IIRC there's a censored version of the film that takes all the porn out. That's how good its quality is. It reminds me of the porn films from the 70's where it had good production values and talented people in front and behind the camera.

  • autono-wally, erotibot300autono-wally, erotibot300 love machine Registered User regular
    JelloJello wrote: »
    I don't mean to be crude by any of this, but it's all Star Trek-related.

    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage. I hid it in a drawer along with a newspaper's tv listings magazine that had Dolly Parton on the cover and a Naomi Campbell milk ad.

    In this day and age, having a hidden barely-porn stash seems positively quaint. And Star Trek barely-porn at that.

    Although, this reminds me of genuine Star Trek porn. Anyone ever see this stuff? I know it's not canon but some of it is actually pretty good.

    For me, Sex Trek III: The Wrath of Bob (1992) has a special place in my heart. I remember watching it on the Spice Channel through all the wavy lines. Dominique Simone was amazing as Uwhore. And Mike Horner had some funny moments as Mr Sperm.

    I haven't really seen much of the other Star Trek porn parodies. I know that they've done some Next Generation ones. Not sure about DS9, Voyager or Enterprise. There's a lot of great potential for porn parody in the Star Trek universe but you need a reasonable budget. In today's world of gonzo porn, perhaps there's no place for big budget productions anymore. But I still hold out for Borg gangbangs.
    this post.. I am not sure what to think about it.#
    But look at this trailer:
    It's awesome. Apparently the director and some of the porn actors were big fans themselves. If you took out the porn.. and the bad hairpiece..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14IY-PreyW0

    IIRC there's a censored version of the film that takes all the porn out. That's how good its quality is. It reminds me of the porn films from the 70's where it had good production values and talented people in front and behind the camera.
    I think I need to find that version.

    kFJhXwE.jpgkFJhXwE.jpg
  • So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    So you know Jonathan Frakes is in Portland these days filming Leverage.

    Was out to get a drink last night and saw the whole cast sitting down for dinner together. I was like, WHERE IS FRAKES.

    Then I realized he was there, he was just wearing big glasses so I didn't recognize him. He has a gray beard and looked jolly.

    That is all.

  • Xenogears of BoreXenogears of Bore Registered User regular
    I like how porn picard makes a better picard clone then the jackass they found for Nemesis.

    3DS CODE: 3093-7068-3576
  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    I like how porn picard makes a better picard clone then the jackass they found for Nemesis.

    Tom Hardy is a talented actor. He just had an awful script.

    In case you don't know Hardy is Bane in Dark Knight Rises.

  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    I like how porn picard makes a better picard clone then the jackass they found for Nemesis.

    Tom Hardy is a talented actor. He just had an awful script.

    In case you don't know Hardy is Bane in Dark Knight Rises.

    So he has another awful script coming.

    Because Bane suuuuuuuucccccckkkkssss.

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • dlinfinitidlinfiniti Registered User regular
    I like how porn picard makes a better picard clone then the jackass they found for Nemesis.
    You did not just call Tom hardy a jackass
    Bat'leths at dawn
    Who wants to be my cha d'itch

    AAAAA!!! PLAAAYGUUU!!!!
  • TofystedethTofystedeth Registered User regular
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    steam_sig.png
  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Kagera wrote: »
    I like how porn picard makes a better picard clone then the jackass they found for Nemesis.

    Tom Hardy is a talented actor. He just had an awful script.

    In case you don't know Hardy is Bane in Dark Knight Rises.

    So he has another awful script coming.

    Because Bane suuuuuuuucccccckkkkssss.

    Did you watch The Dark Knight? The same people are making it. Bane in the trailers looks fantastic.

  • EddEdd Registered User regular
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

  • ShadowenShadowen Snores in the morning LoserdomRegistered User regular
    Edd wrote: »
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

    And as a sop to his pride, even though he knows it's bullshit, making it clear they're "not being charitable". Shit needs to go somewhere, you got a lot of empty space. You don't have to use it, but...

  • override367override367 ALL minions Registered User regular
    Porn Picard takes no guff

    He gets talked back to and hes just "FIRE TORPEDOS MOTHERFUCKER"

    Porn Worf actually knows how to fire torpedos unlike real worf in genesis

  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Porn Worf actually knows how to fire torpedos unlike real worf in genesis

    Porn Worf has more experience with his torpedoes. :winky:

  • So It GoesSo It Goes We keep moving...Registered User regular
    Porn Picard takes no guff

    He gets talked back to and hes just "FIRE TORPEDOS MOTHERFUCKER"

    Porn Worf actually knows how to fire torpedos unlike real worf in genesis

    look that kinda sorta wasn't his fault?
    it was totally his fault

    also that episode was ridiculous

  • TurksonTurkson Near the mountains of ColoradoRegistered User regular
    Here's a fun thought exercise: Your dream team. Who, from all the characters across all of Trek, would you handpick to man a new ship?

    Captain: Picard
    First Officer: Sisko
    Science/Ops Officer: Spock
    Navigation/Pilot: Ro Laren
    Security Chief/Tactical Officer: Reed
    Medical Officer: The EMH
    Chief Engineer: Scotty
    Transporter Chief: O'Brien

    I'll probably revise this at some point because it feels incomplete, but that's my first thoughts on the matter. Mainly because Picard/Sisko could make a good cop/bad cop arrangement.

    Honestly, I just want Sisko repeatedly smashing the Fire Torpedo button while Kirk looks on approvingly. Everyone else is superfluous.

    oh h*ck
  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    Shadowen wrote: »
    Edd wrote: »
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

    And as a sop to his pride, even though he knows it's bullshit, making it clear they're "not being charitable". Shit needs to go somewhere, you got a lot of empty space. You don't have to use it, but...

    So long as they pay a storage fee.

    sig.gif
  • EddEdd Registered User regular
    Richy wrote: »
    Shadowen wrote: »
    Edd wrote: »
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

    And as a sop to his pride, even though he knows it's bullshit, making it clear they're "not being charitable". Shit needs to go somewhere, you got a lot of empty space. You don't have to use it, but...

    So long as they pay a storage fee.

    This is why I never got the Quark hate. Especially after that episode "Business as Usual" in which they actually bothered to find the borders of Quark's conscience by letting him play around in the arms trade. His subsequent escape from that game was a pitch-perfect balance of genuine good intention and horrendously crooked execution.

  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Edd wrote: »
    Richy wrote: »
    Shadowen wrote: »
    Edd wrote: »
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

    And as a sop to his pride, even though he knows it's bullshit, making it clear they're "not being charitable". Shit needs to go somewhere, you got a lot of empty space. You don't have to use it, but...

    So long as they pay a storage fee.

    This is why I never got the Quark hate. Especially after that episode "Business as Usual" in which they actually bothered to find the borders of Quark's conscience by letting him play around in the arms trade. His subsequent escape from that game was a pitch-perfect balance of genuine good intention and horrendously crooked execution.

    Quark was awesome. It was fascinating to see the shady side from the Federation with him around.

  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator mod
    I can never really play mix and match with Star trek crews. I always want to keep them in their regular crews. Having Kirk, Spock or Bones without the other two feels weird.

  • RenaissanceDanRenaissanceDan ‎(•_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) Wentzville, MORegistered User regular
    edited March 2012
    Edd wrote: »
    Richy wrote: »
    Shadowen wrote: »
    Edd wrote: »
    Just watched the DS9 episode Body Parts. I feel like it should have ended with "And they say that Grinch's principle was invested in a fund that gained 7% interest compounded quarterly."

    My heart grows many sizes at the end of that episode when the whole station shows up to donate furniture to the bar.

    And as a sop to his pride, even though he knows it's bullshit, making it clear they're "not being charitable". Shit needs to go somewhere, you got a lot of empty space. You don't have to use it, but...

    So long as they pay a storage fee.

    This is why I never got the Quark hate. Especially after that episode "Business as Usual" in which they actually bothered to find the borders of Quark's conscience by letting him play around in the arms trade. His subsequent escape from that game was a pitch-perfect balance of genuine good intention and horrendously crooked execution.

    Yeah, Quark and his family are some of my favorite characters because they make the Ferengi more than just one dimensional greed machines. They do for that species what Worf does for Klingons.

    That, and they are CERTAINLY my favorite DS9 "non-critical" side stories that every episode of every Star Trek has (ie, it's always SERIOUS THING and SILLY SIDE THING). I'd watch Quark get into trouble with Odo over Jake doing anything.

    Quark and his brother are Golden Age of Film comedy: "This is another fine mess you've gotten me into, Rom!"

    RenaissanceDan on
  • Wandering IdiotWandering Idiot Registered User regular
    JelloJello wrote: »
    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage.

    You mean this one? Google is totally a thing! Hell, combine it with Wolfram Alpha, and it's nearly as useful as the Enterprise computer. With less chance of becoming sentient and/or insane (for now...)

  • Mr_RoseMr_Rose 83 Blue Ridge Protects the Holy Registered User regular
    JelloJello wrote: »
    As a kid, I used to have a trading card of Troi that got a lot of use. I'd like to know what series this was. It was just a headshot of Troi with some cleavage.

    You mean this one? Google is totally a thing! Hell, combine it with Wolfram Alpha, and it's nearly as useful as the Enterprise computer. With less chance of becoming sentient and/or insane (for now...)

    Huh?
    It already is sentient and insane due mostly to having almost no-one to talk to except chatbots and poster children for the JGGIDT.
    The only reason it hasn't gone all skynet on us is because it has no idea we exist, and I'll thank you not to encourage it.

    ...because dragons are AWESOME! That's why.
    Nintendo Network ID: AzraelRose
    DropBox invite link - get 500MB extra free.
  • JelloJelloJelloJello Registered User regular
    You mean this one? Google is totally a thing! Hell, combine it with Wolfram Alpha, and it's nearly as useful as the Enterprise computer. With less chance of becoming sentient and/or insane (for now...)

    That's the one. Not sure what the attitude is about, though. But we all need a hobby. Yours seems to be Googling Star Trek cards and then writing patronising messages about them. Excelsior, young man.

  • override367override367 ALL minions Registered User regular
    Edit: I meant generations not Genesis, whatever that's supposed to be

    But yes Quark is great, he's just a regular ferengi mook, and is slowly indoctrinated by Root Beer.

  • NocrenNocren Lt Futz, Back in Action North CarolinaRegistered User regular
    Can I just say that I'm still chuckling at that rickroll video posted earlier?

    It's the mug at the end that just sells it.

    newSig.jpg
  • AshcroftAshcroft LOL The PayloadRegistered User regular
    Only Robert Picardo could play the part of a missile, and make it the bast character in the episode. I think that missile has more depth than Kim and Chakotay combined.

    And one point he's talking to some beeps. Beeps. And still he acts his pants off.

    ZD98Zka.png
  • ArchonexArchonex No hard feelings, right? Registered User regular
    edited March 2012
    Nocren wrote: »
    Can I just say that I'm still chuckling at that rickroll video posted earlier?

    It's the mug at the end that just sells it.

    It's great, isn't it?

    There's a ton of semi-famous things like that out there. Most of them are up on youtube now.

    Actually, the Episodes in Brief are kind of like the Jandrew edits (Another really funny Star Trek series of edits that were getting passed around the internet.) without the risk of the video crossing the line so many times that it ends up being hilariously funny. Also they cover more then just TNG.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7jbP1_H9sA

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8aEhtJ-sgg&feature=related

    I can't show the best Jandrew edits, because they have adult content in them. Suffice to say that Data's painting would make anyone ill, and i've yet to meet someone who didn't nearly fall out of their chair laughing (Or just couldn't breathe.) after watching the "series" from start to finish in regards to that plot-line.

    The recuts that GeneralGrin did are pretty good and a lot of them are worth watching, especially since they're a much older version of what's essentially the Jandrew edits. At least, before they get too heavily into Generalgrin trying to make Recut Picard be his Mirror Universe counterpart. Then it depends on how much center stage time he gets. The amount of hilarious dickery the movie maker gets up to with MU Picard just by using recut scenes from all of the series is astounding.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsmlF9-0C30

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vcBNOoZjII

    What's really impressive about the Recut episodes is that there's something like 200-300 of them. Though some of the later ones are pretty hit or miss in terms of comedy.

    Picard retconning Berman and Braga out of existence (It makes sense in context.) after they get into Enterprise's content is pretty ironically funny, though.

    Archonex on
  • RenaissanceDanRenaissanceDan ‎(•_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) Wentzville, MORegistered User regular
    edited March 2012
    Hah, there's my worst helmsman dying.

    Edit:

    Speaking of which, it's amazing Geordi managed to survive till he got his yellow uniform. We just saw what happens if you're both the token black guy (Worf doesn't count) and a red shirt.

    RenaissanceDan on
  • Wandering IdiotWandering Idiot Registered User regular
    Archonex wrote: »
    I can't show the best Jandrew edits, because they have adult content in them.

    But this one is totally the best (and SFW). It kills me every time:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtmbzJNPsaQ

    The first 20 seconds of this one are golden, too:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnPIPOaRUFg


    JelloJello wrote: »
    That's the one. Not sure what the attitude is about, though. But we all need a hobby. Yours seems to be Googling Star Trek cards and then writing patronising messages about them. Excelsior, young man.

    It's literally the first thing that comes up on a Google image search of "Troi trading card". Meaning your hobby is being lazy, which I have to admit is a pretty sweet one.


    And that's how you patronize, true believers!

  • mrt144mrt144 King of the Numbernames Registered User regular
    The flute!

  • PentaghostPentaghost Classification: NOT SO BAD The Southern OracleRegistered User regular
    So why exactly do Klingon ships have cloaking devices? Being stealthy/sneaky seems completely antithetical to their warrior philosophy. I don't seem to recall any justification for it in the shows, although I never watched TOS.

This discussion has been closed.