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chiba37
Registered User
Registered User
Hey! I'm new to the forums and I heard good things about the posters here,like half the planet I have a webcomic stiffs.thewebcomic.com/,but that's not why I'm here I put my comic
on hold for a couple of weeks to dig through my files and put up some new(old) stuff on my personal website,so I want a critique of
some of the purpose pieces I want to put up on the site:
no name yet
cupid's day off (a t-shirt idea)
13
tell what you think
more to come later
on hold for a couple of weeks to dig through my files and put up some new(old) stuff on my personal website,so I want a critique of
some of the purpose pieces I want to put up on the site:
no name yet
cupid's day off (a t-shirt idea)
13
tell what you think
more to come later
chiba37 on
0
Posts
The middle image is a bit...riddle-like to me. What is Cupid's Day Off? What is Chiba 37? Why is this guy being hit with a carton of stuff? Why does the hand with the phone have a different coloured thumb, or is that a partially-obscured crescent moon? Does that make the 'impact' a sun? What is it?
I mean, if you're going for surreality, you've certainly got something out there on that one.
I do like the other two much more. The boy holding the box has a lot of unique qualities-the deliberate positioning of the feet, the weird, tension-defined hands, the strange box holding the icons of half-baked adolescence...The fingernails on the left hand all twitching and different. Not sure if the drawing needs the 'sunburst' of illumination behind the head. It does give it a good focal pop, but it might be better suited by making the light source of the box the dominant light illuminating the face.
I have to correct one thing the behind his in 13 was the shine from the box
but all in all good thoughts and maybe i might have make some changes to cupid so some things are clearer
rtoony but lately that's where my head is at,it could change in a couple
Of months
I see you point about the filters,can't say I love them as much as when I first did the pic
One does not simply become great at stylised drawing by doing stylised drawing alone, all the best cartoonist have a solid foundation in fundamentals. I can tell from your cartoon work that you struggle with construction and movement. I'm not saying this to be a jerk, but when you start down this well worn path it will open a whole world of options when it comes to your artwork. It is like having an art roadmap to the thing you want to create. Once you have that your stylised drawings will start to really develop.
I forced myself to read a few more bofore commenting though hoping to see something different.
From an art standpoint you're better than 80% of what's out there.
From a writing standpoint you come off as an angry teen with nothing original to say. You use bad grammar and language as though it makes the jokes "edgy" but all it does for me is make me loose interest.
It seems you want to write sociopolitical humor like Boondocks. I'd recommended reading up on current events and cleaning up your writing so you generate fresh relevant content instead of retreading.
When I do a strip asking about Fred's boss asking him if he's gay,that really happen to me
*the incident in the bathroom was so true that I had to wait until the individuals involved left the job so I could tell the story,lol
my goal in the beginning was a comic gear as a seduction of innocent,where we see Fred at the start of the jo(b bright-eyed and full of hope until the end where he's turned into a jaded vet like his co-workers or maybe not I haven't decided. I will admit I've lost my way,I'm not gag-a-day writer which is why I'm going go be doing more story arcs
80% thanks! considering that I'm mostly self-taught(I do have a art degree but mostly in ad work and not comics)
You're right about the grammer,I need an editor
If you consider your post respondong above for a minute it is articulate and follows a certain path of thought.
Sometimes in your comic the language made it difficult to discern what was being said. Making following what was happening kind of disjointed and hard to follow.
100 Bullets is a comic that uses slang and heavily styalized dialogue to flesh out a characters background / ethnicity / culture etc and it does it very well.
But this can be very difficult to pull off. And even when done well can initially lead to confusing your audience.
In anycase I particularly am enjoying the art you're posting here and hope you continue.
Wow. This shows quite a lot of promise. The control in the shading...
just hit control z problem fixed but when you do it with pen and paper with this many lines even liquids paper can't fix your problems
By the best and in different languages too,lol my skin is thick I can respect a person
Who might not like what I do as long as there is real thought behind it and not just hate
cuz at that point I got to set fire to that ass,lol
I think in the future I'm going to keep the slang to min
this is a page from a mock pamphlet i'm making for an up coming story
a t-shirt idea