Yeah honestly I would delete all the caveats re: gaming. You don't feel the need to explain your liking to watch movies or play guitar, so why should a casual video game hobby be any different? Why make yourself appear defensive before she even has the chance to decide whether she thinks it's a good or a bad thing? (Could even make a girl think you've been accused of ignoring someone/being one of those guys in the past.) If you want to downplay it, seems counter intuitive to spend extra words on it.
Minor point, but you want to complement each other, not compliment. (I mean, you probably want that too, but in the sense you wrote it, you spelled it wrong. )
Music list kinda made me laugh, you mention you love metal three times, but then list mostly mainstream bands. Not trying to judge, but if you want to meet someone who's into metal, might want to mention some of the more metal bands you like, too.
On that note, that might be a good idea for you guys who are worried about being too up-front about gaming but still want to mention it. Could just add a "favorite games" with a few, in the section where you're already listing movies and TV and books... so girls who like games will notice, but girls who don't won't see it as a focus of your profile if it's listed in the summary, y'know?
All criticisms are welcome, even minor points. After all this is all helping me to a better profile. Good point about the caveats. Also, I understand what you mean about mainstream bands when talking about Metallica, Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Dave Matthews...but even Metallica, before they were mainstream, were Metal. I mean they were one of the bands who pioneered thrash metal. Also Soilwork, and Strapping Young Lad, are definitely not mainstream. Especially not SYL, I think even their hits aren't very well known outside of the metal crowd. Dethklok you can argue since they are a cartoon, but as a band are pretty brutal. It is my favorite genre of music, however that doesn't mean all of my favorite bands will land in said genre. I didn't want to go too deep into obscure bands as to not alienate any girls who only have a passing interest, but if you're saying that is an issue and that that is the kind of girl I should be gearing my profile towards than I see your point. Also ok maybe saying i love metal 3 times is excessive, I'll edit that as well.
Again thanks for all the help! Keep em coming!
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Casually HardcoreOnce an Asshole. Trying to be better.Registered Userregular
Hey guys, I figure I like to get in on the fun! So far I've been message a few people back and forth consistently. Not bad, considering I just made this profile a few days ago. I know I'm lacking pictures, but I honestly don't have any pictures of me . I'm telling my friends to remedy that problem, though.
Remove the crazy religious talk. Your opening paragraph seems cheesy as hell, but maybe people like that.
Reduce the paragraphs that don't really mean much.
Generally, the possibilities are endless with me. I have one life to live, I might as well experience all that I can. I love doing things I've never done before or put me outside of my comfort zone a little.
Hey, I'll be honest. I don't talk much, but I do love to listen. What I most love about meeting new people are learning about them, figuring out how they tick, and usually not being judgmental.
That's the second time you've dropped the "L" bomb. Just a pet peeve of mine.
...and lastly I'm imaging imagining about myself slaying dragons and sailing space ships.
I have responsibilities that needs to be handled.
But of course this is all little stuff, you'll need pictures ASAP if you want to be taken seriously by the vast majority of people you message.
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Casually HardcoreOnce an Asshole. Trying to be better.Registered Userregular
Sorry, the crazy religious talk needs to stay there. I've been burn one too many times when it comes to religion, people wanting me to be saved, and relationships/friendships ending because, apparently, 'I'm truly am lost.' .
Okay, then lessen the space it occupies in your profile. It's 2/3rds of your self summary and devoting that much space to ranting against a single imagined group of people is off-putting, especially at the beginning. Your name is AwesomeAthiest, do you really need that much ad space wasted on promoting that you're non-religious?
Well my name is just numbers
But then I really don't talk about how I am a athiest here because this state is very reglious
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Casually HardcoreOnce an Asshole. Trying to be better.Registered Userregular
Fine, I'll work on that part. I'm still a little bitter about the last time religion became a wedge struck by the holy sledgehammer of might between people that I know.
@Casually Hardcore, whether or not you do decide to leave the crazy religious part in your profile, something to consider. On these sites there are pretty much two kinds of people: those who do the messaging (and for the sad part, have to), and those that get messaged (lots of messages). What I find interesting is how the two need to setup their profiles.
Those who do the messaging, need to make their profile open and inviting. They will spend their time finding ways so that whenever they do send out messages, it won't scare off people from replying. Which means they often leave out any negativity like "don't message me if", but instead have a more positive spin. Remember, you can always find out more about religion or things that bother you looking at their profile or through messages. But having it in your profile might scare away people before giving you a chance.
As for those who get messaged? They spend their time creating a profile stating who and who should not be sending them message. Thing is, sometimes no matter what they put in their profile won't stop people from sending them messages.
So if you find you get messaged and whenever you send out messages you get replies, then you don't have anything to worry about. However, if you notice you don't get messaged and most of your messages do not get responses (which is often the case, I think I had a 20% reply rate), you should consider tweaking your profile a bit.
Fine, I'll work on that part. I'm still a little bitter about the last time religion became a wedge struck by the holy sledgehammer of might between people that I know.
Well, that's exactly how I read that part: baggage. I think that's how others will interpret it too.
Fine, I'll work on that part. I'm still a little bitter about the last time religion became a wedge struck by the holy sledgehammer of might between people that I know.
Well, that's exactly how I read that part: baggage. I think that's how others will interpret it too.
Yep.
If you absolutely must have something about it in there, there's the "message me if" section where people often add their "don't message me if" warnings. Where it is now, and the amount of space it takes up, really makes it the focus of your profile.
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Casually HardcoreOnce an Asshole. Trying to be better.Registered Userregular
I got a date with a girl from OKC tomorrow! Woo! A gourmet burger joint with a huge drink menu is an acceptable place to go get "drinks," right? I've been struck with hyper-overanalysis paralysis suddenly. Now, I remember why I don't date often... it turns me into a neurotic wreck at the beginning.
You should be telling us, you know her better then all of us combined!
Good point. She and I seem like fairly similar people, and the burger joint with the giant drink menu sounds pretty damn good to me. I think I'll go for it. If she doesn't like, it she's always welcome to reject the idea.
I just prefer sleazy dive bars with bar food. Burger joint sounds fun and could be filling if you still want to drink and not get tipsy. Burger joints are usually loud and annoying, harder to hear people over a more casual weekday in a local bar that only has the sad, married or single men drinking away their sadness at.
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Casually HardcoreOnce an Asshole. Trying to be better.Registered Userregular
Man, i wish I knew bars where you can hear yourself talk. Every single bar I've been too have music up so loud that you have to scream to hear yourself.
I guess the best compromise would be something like a Yard House, if you have one of those around.
Well, she accepted the burger joint.. so we'll see how it goes. I've been on a few dates from OKC and they've all been a bit disastrous, but this one feels different. If the place is too loud, it's in the middle of this big nice commercial district and we can take a walk.
Got back from the meet-up. It went well I think. We are a lot a like and she was cute. We didn't have any lulls in conversation and just shot the shit and joked for the whole time. Definitely not the trainwreck others have been. We chatted about Forbidden Planet for a while which was cool. I damn well think I'll ask her out again, though I'm about 70% sure on how to parse "maybe we should do this again sometime"
Sorry, the crazy religious talk needs to stay there. I've been burn one too many times when it comes to religion, people wanting me to be saved, and relationships/friendships ending because, apparently, 'I'm truly am lost.' .
But, thank you for pointing out the other stuff.
Why don't you just set some mandatory profile questions and double check their answers before messaging to be safe?
Man, the one thing I'm not liking about Okcupid is the browsing. Seriously, a face picture and 5 lines of text ain't much to go one.
That and apparently only bisexual women in polyamaorous relationships use this website, not that it's a turn off. It's just rather odd.
Where the hell do you live, Seattle?
I know, it's pretty weird considering I haven't actually met anyone in person who have the same traits. I always figure Colorado is more on the conservative side of things. It's somewhat of an eye opener when a good 1/3 of the profiles starts with "I'm bi and currently married, but I'm in a polyamorous relationship and I'm looking for someone else"
There seems to be a disproportionately high amount of that here as well (male and female, but I mean, a LOT of people on there who are already in a relationship), but, y'know, it's New York.
Woot... Friday will mark one month of dating this girl I randomly messaged cause she was cute, has a job, has a car, and isn't living with her parents. Best random decision yet.
The RPG Bestiary - Dangerous foes and legendary monsters for D&D 4th Edition
What's the policy re:using pictures that are also on my facebook? It would be stupid to use the same picture as I use on LinkedIn, but FB is kind of in between for me (got a few aunts and friends of my mom's on there)...
I'm kind of preparing myself for whenever I feel confident enough to talk to women with the intention to date.
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kaliyamaLeft to find less-moderated foraRegistered Userregular
-- @Delinator
I know it's a thing in Germany, but as far as "first thing I would like to know about you" the language of movies you like to watch is way down on my priority list. I took that first question more as a way to describe what would define me. Maybe move the stuff about movies down to the category where you're supposed to list them? And instead talk a bit about what you do when you're not unwinding or working?
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Minor point, but you want to complement each other, not compliment. (I mean, you probably want that too, but in the sense you wrote it, you spelled it wrong. )
Music list kinda made me laugh, you mention you love metal three times, but then list mostly mainstream bands. Not trying to judge, but if you want to meet someone who's into metal, might want to mention some of the more metal bands you like, too.
On that note, that might be a good idea for you guys who are worried about being too up-front about gaming but still want to mention it. Could just add a "favorite games" with a few, in the section where you're already listing movies and TV and books... so girls who like games will notice, but girls who don't won't see it as a focus of your profile if it's listed in the summary, y'know?
Again thanks for all the help! Keep em coming!
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/AwesomeAthiest
now tear me a new one, hot stuff!
Reduce the paragraphs that don't really mean much.
That's the second time you've dropped the "L" bomb. Just a pet peeve of mine.
But of course this is all little stuff, you'll need pictures ASAP if you want to be taken seriously by the vast majority of people you message.
But, thank you for pointing out the other stuff.
But then I really don't talk about how I am a athiest here because this state is very reglious
wrong thread.
Those who do the messaging, need to make their profile open and inviting. They will spend their time finding ways so that whenever they do send out messages, it won't scare off people from replying. Which means they often leave out any negativity like "don't message me if", but instead have a more positive spin. Remember, you can always find out more about religion or things that bother you looking at their profile or through messages. But having it in your profile might scare away people before giving you a chance.
As for those who get messaged? They spend their time creating a profile stating who and who should not be sending them message. Thing is, sometimes no matter what they put in their profile won't stop people from sending them messages.
So if you find you get messaged and whenever you send out messages you get replies, then you don't have anything to worry about. However, if you notice you don't get messaged and most of your messages do not get responses (which is often the case, I think I had a 20% reply rate), you should consider tweaking your profile a bit.
Well, that's exactly how I read that part: baggage. I think that's how others will interpret it too.
Yep.
If you absolutely must have something about it in there, there's the "message me if" section where people often add their "don't message me if" warnings. Where it is now, and the amount of space it takes up, really makes it the focus of your profile.
My Little Game Blog - http://profundospielen.blogspot.com/
Sometimes I take them to the Margarita joint.
Other times it's the Martini joint.
Or it could be a gourmet burger joint with a bar.
You should be telling us, you know her better then all of us combined!
Good point. She and I seem like fairly similar people, and the burger joint with the giant drink menu sounds pretty damn good to me. I think I'll go for it. If she doesn't like, it she's always welcome to reject the idea.
My Little Game Blog - http://profundospielen.blogspot.com/
I guess the best compromise would be something like a Yard House, if you have one of those around.
My Little Game Blog - http://profundospielen.blogspot.com/
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/brownchiclets
Looks pretty awesome. I think you missed a C in "You only live onCe." I like your "flying casually into a pool" pic more than the rock climbing one.
The first rock climbing pic is actually by far your least flattering, and you have a ton of awesome ones -- take it out, IMO.
Agreed, the pool pic should definitely be your main. Also, where did you get that squid hat? I MUST know.
That and apparently only bisexual women in polyamaorous relationships use this website, not that it's a turn off. It's just rather odd.
I should be receiving a call in a few minutes.
Where the hell do you live, Seattle?
My Little Game Blog - http://profundospielen.blogspot.com/
Why don't you just set some mandatory profile questions and double check their answers before messaging to be safe?
@Mighty Got the hat at Six Flags. Pretty awesome hat really.
I know, it's pretty weird considering I haven't actually met anyone in person who have the same traits. I always figure Colorado is more on the conservative side of things. It's somewhat of an eye opener when a good 1/3 of the profiles starts with "I'm bi and currently married, but I'm in a polyamorous relationship and I'm looking for someone else"
You are going to die alone.
I'm kind of preparing myself for whenever I feel confident enough to talk to women with the intention to date.
Nah, depends entirely on context. Slider's also pretty good looking, which gives him a lot more leeway.
I'd do a closer-up photo for #3 instead of the windsurfing one.
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Starwind1979
--
@Delinator
I know it's a thing in Germany, but as far as "first thing I would like to know about you" the language of movies you like to watch is way down on my priority list. I took that first question more as a way to describe what would define me. Maybe move the stuff about movies down to the category where you're supposed to list them? And instead talk a bit about what you do when you're not unwinding or working?