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Looking for a general audience's opinion-
SAI 9to5
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Hey everyone, I specifically made a profile to post my short film for a limited time (don't want to upset any festivals) in one of my favorite sub-forums on the internet. I really need some critiques and real reactions to the film I spent more than a year making, that don't come from family, friends, or crew members. I know everyone on here is good for it, and if you can spare thirteen minutes and forty seconds (w/ credits) it would give me some insight into how we'll play to fests and what we should do on the next one. Appreciate all comments, and looking forward to having a more diverse audience. Thank you for your time.
(Also, I think in this cut there are two shots that hadn't been color corrected yet, just to let you know)
(Also, I think in this cut there are two shots that hadn't been color corrected yet, just to let you know)
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In terms of pacing, I found it a bit confusing. I think the long presidential speech was a bit too much, and I'm still confused about why they're from Mars. The president's speech went over ground that you'd already hinted at plenty, and wasn't needed in that detail, and I found the jump in 5-6 years to be a little jarring, and kind of cut into development of relationships, although I guess you'd be limited by what actors you had! Were they all siblings? Fantastic job making their faces and mannerisms match.
So yeah, visually fantastic, that one shot aside, story-wise I found it a little confusing and oddly paced - less presidential explanation and a little more explanation into what I assume was a twist, but I'd have to watch again to be sure. Very very impressive though. And that spaceship shot, wow. I really wanted more of that
My only real critique is the flashback-esque scene in the corn field. The lighting was different from the rest of the shots, and of a poorer quality, and it just didn't fit well with the rest of the film. It was 10 seconds tops, but it was definitely noticeable.
I really did enjoy this. I thought throughout the film your lighting and camera angles were really well done. Also your film didn't reek of that "I got my buddies who can't act to act in this and everything feels forced and fake" theme that most do. I don't know how you cast this, but you did a fantastic job with it.
The only casting choice I didn't enjoy was the news anchor. He seemed like he was trying to impersonate Morgan Freeman who was impersonating Barack Obama and it just didn't work for me. It took me out of the scene more than once just trying to understand him. The lines he was speaking were good lines, I just think next time you should go with a better voice over guy, and my apologies if that man was you or a friend of yours, it just didn't work for me there.
The mother and child were both exceptionally cast, as well as the president.
My personal preference would be to sandbag the reveal from them being from another planet until closer to the end, maybe even after the soldier's speech (I'm assuming he's a soldier, the one at the end lying in the bed) or right before takeoff. That's just my .02 though, I like how you had the teenagers talking about it with each other just fine too.
Really, really good with with the sfx. I hope we see more of your stuff here!
I'd like to see the twist either come right at the very end, or have a bit more explanation. I spent the last minute of the film trying to fully comprehend what was going on.
On a personal level, I love the plot of the film for the emphasis on the power and importance of space travel. I doubt you had an agenda when you came up with the concept, but it's a topic I enjoy seeing visualized.