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Kiki - A prototype of a webcomic, still in infancy - NSFW too
GreenGear
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
Ey! First post here. I've lurked the forums a few times but never registered. I'm trying to find the right forums that work as a good idea wall. Most of what I post to my tumblr or to art threads on /co/ get no replies. So we'll see.
I'm a huge fan of that 90s generation of cartoons like Batman:TAS, Ninja Turtles and Darkwing Duck, which had no problem being a monster-of-the-week type deal. What was cool about them was that the parents could unironically enjoy it too. They had to get over the initial absurd premise, though. And I think that's what makes it fun. Liking a series for one thing despite what it SEEMS to be.
Getting to the point. I want to make a superhero story set in an island nation, and the herione is a casual nudist beach bunny who stumbles upon an ancient pirate's magical bandanna in a coastal grotto. So her power is invincibility (the kind where you still get knocked around due to issues of weight, but never suffer a scratch from it), and her 'Gotham' is a fictional world's equivalent of Honolulu, Hawaii.
Anyway, here's my first go at what the comic would look like.
The current 9-panel layout, and the style of text bubbles will NOT be carrying over. That line-less style and the bright popping colors would be, however. That's Mondo Bot from Samurai Jack btw. Not canon with what I've got planned or anything; Just an archetype baddie to build a draft with.
I'm interested in hearing the initial, unabashed MENTAL reaction to this idea. Like, how it strikes you personally, instead of how it would seem 'proper' to respond. I want this comic to be about nudity the same way the Cosby Show was about race; IE, it wasn't really. I'm a big admirer of how The Meek handled nudity. My goal is that after time, no one even talks about the fact that Kiki is naked during her adventures. I've gotten the opinions from a lot of my guy friends, and they dig it, but I'm really interested in how this strikes the ladies. I've come across a couple that are really chill with it, and that lifts my spirits. I mean, it's their toes I'm sort of stepping on to make this happen. I want to hear the dynamic social consensus from the opposite side of the fence from the one that I'm on. If it's not gratuitous, is it cool? Where's the line that makes it gratuitous?--Have I already crossed it, maybe? There will be a fair share of naked dudes walking around the place. It's a clothes-optional island nation after all. According to the setting, it's a thing that's been around for awhile.
ANYWAY. Any response is better than no response. Silence is the only thing that discourages me. It's good to meet you, PA forums.
I'm a huge fan of that 90s generation of cartoons like Batman:TAS, Ninja Turtles and Darkwing Duck, which had no problem being a monster-of-the-week type deal. What was cool about them was that the parents could unironically enjoy it too. They had to get over the initial absurd premise, though. And I think that's what makes it fun. Liking a series for one thing despite what it SEEMS to be.
Getting to the point. I want to make a superhero story set in an island nation, and the herione is a casual nudist beach bunny who stumbles upon an ancient pirate's magical bandanna in a coastal grotto. So her power is invincibility (the kind where you still get knocked around due to issues of weight, but never suffer a scratch from it), and her 'Gotham' is a fictional world's equivalent of Honolulu, Hawaii.
Anyway, here's my first go at what the comic would look like.
The current 9-panel layout, and the style of text bubbles will NOT be carrying over. That line-less style and the bright popping colors would be, however. That's Mondo Bot from Samurai Jack btw. Not canon with what I've got planned or anything; Just an archetype baddie to build a draft with.
I'm interested in hearing the initial, unabashed MENTAL reaction to this idea. Like, how it strikes you personally, instead of how it would seem 'proper' to respond. I want this comic to be about nudity the same way the Cosby Show was about race; IE, it wasn't really. I'm a big admirer of how The Meek handled nudity. My goal is that after time, no one even talks about the fact that Kiki is naked during her adventures. I've gotten the opinions from a lot of my guy friends, and they dig it, but I'm really interested in how this strikes the ladies. I've come across a couple that are really chill with it, and that lifts my spirits. I mean, it's their toes I'm sort of stepping on to make this happen. I want to hear the dynamic social consensus from the opposite side of the fence from the one that I'm on. If it's not gratuitous, is it cool? Where's the line that makes it gratuitous?--Have I already crossed it, maybe? There will be a fair share of naked dudes walking around the place. It's a clothes-optional island nation after all. According to the setting, it's a thing that's been around for awhile.
ANYWAY. Any response is better than no response. Silence is the only thing that discourages me. It's good to meet you, PA forums.
GreenGear on
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I really like the style, I wouldn't be too rigid with the panel structure.
Once I realized this was not a Metroid comic I put it together, but mentally it was a bit of a grinding gear shift. Could use a better establishing shot and fix all of that. I did really like the breakup on the sixth panel and the fancy "shit." Could use more of that, a comic of this style can benefit greatly through simply varying size and placement of panels.
Welcome to the AC!
I'm glad that's been like the only complaint across the board! I have a really good feeling about this now. :'D
This is from a little farther back. As another test, I drew Kiki fighting Super Macho Man. A similar character might be to Kiki what Bonesaw was to Spiderman.
If you are worried about what kinds of poses to avoid take a look at a tumblr solely dedicated to finding ridiculous, gratuitous comic book depictions of women: http://eschergirls.tumblr.com/
They don't just showcase bad art, they break down why the artwork is bad: why the pose is ridiculous (like the infamous "tits AND ass pose"), how it is that her boobs are defying the laws of gravity etc. Sometimes the more artistically inclined bog followers will redraw the artwork in question to make it more realistic and less demeaning and mid-boggling.
Cultures round the world have adapted to hot climates. In some places they don't disrobe much, and wear long flowing clothes that breath and block sunlight. In others the people wear considerably less. It is worth mentioning that the people of these lands are typically darker skinned. Lighter skinned people like your heroine are going to need things like sunblock! And sunhats, sunglasses and parasols, and probably flip-flops. Not kidding! If you are gonna go with a silly premise you may as well add in little realistic touches like that to really sell it, also it is funny to think of people walking around nude but still walking around with little parasols and flipflops. You may as well look into the culture of the nudist colonies that do exist. For example: in public spaces they bring sarongs (wrapped around at the hip or waist) or towels with them to sit on as a matter of health and hygiene. So have your characters doing the same.
If I ever draw gravity-defying boobs, I apologize in advance. It's purely because I haven't had the hours with them that you've had. I mean, I'm never QUITE sure where they graft to the skin. Or what they look like during extreme stress. I'm keeping Kiki at a B cup for many, many reasons. SARONGS!! YES. I knew there was something I was missing. But I didn't know the name, so I was lost. I needed that. lol. For awhile there I thought they just brought along traditional towels. And yeah, parasols, big googly sunglasses, and straw hats. I am not opposed to these classy things. Kiki runs with a nomadic beach bum type of crowd. Not dirtpoor hippies, but... Well, I'm not even sure how I should pigeonhole this one. lol. Also I'm not sure I'll be a stickler for tans. I won't skirt around the issue of tropical community vs skin tone or anything, but I can't say there will be many scenes showing the application of sunblock.--No, I take that back, actually. I'll totally do that for scene transitions where I want people immediately to know where we've jumped.
And have you ever put sunblock on just because of the way it smells? s:
Annnndddd. Unrelated detective birds.
Practiced some waves today. The drawings of Kiki herself are rather weak, though.
This guy is Gyro Grove, a gadget-based superhero who had retired from hero-work 5 years before Kiki found her magic bandanna. In her adolescent years she followed his awesome media spectacle, and it inspired her to take up surfing, as well as use her superpowers for good, and not selfish personal stuff. A little later into the story, Gyro Grove comes back. He seems to have gone rogue, but there's bound to be more to it, in Kiki's eyes.
I like making the mechanical stuff seem legit. Especially in that steampunk-level of high tech/low tech. This foldable metal arm shoots out of this metal shell backpack to reveal a gyrocopter (which is his secondary means of flight aside from the "sky shoe" jet board, which his froglike footwear magnetizes to.) I had a lot of fun trying to make the human-copter thing look a little different from Inspector Gadget's style.
But it's always those ideas that I bury in there that I never get feedback from.
But yeah, I wanted to make the gyrocopter and jetboard clearer to myself, and that's the main reason for this pic.
Dr.Unorthodox is constantly in open mode. His colleagues have observed that they've never seen him sleeping or even take a single bathroom break. So many questions no one is willing to ask. Questions as important as "What science field is he in?"
Dr.Droid has OCD's OCD. Blueprints for a blueprint-mapping robot, to build an even better blueprint-mapping robot. A device on his desk that constantly straightens and recurls a single paperclip in perfect symmetrical harmony. You can set your watch to his next panic attack.--And why not? He does.
Dr.Tabbycat is an insufferable pollyanna, morbidly fascinated in one's psychic reaction to context wrought by the 5 senses. With enough data-crunching, one can manufacture a 10 by 10 by 10 foot square room of preordained sights, sounds and smells to cause just about any response. This science odyssey all started with a tray of chocolate chip cookies; Which she believes is mightier than the pen, AND sword.
Lucious Ouroboros Jr., heir to a multi-billion dollar corporate dynasty. He is, if nothing else, a remorseless self-involved sociopath. He has fingers in many different soups. Four prolific mad scientists; One homework assignment: "Delete" the bandanna'd beach bunny. No reason given to them.
This is how I most prefer to draw new characters for the first time. In some sort of extreme context. When I try to start a new character through a height chart or something, it has a way of feeling too sterile, and never comes out right.
This is what makes the whole thing seem really skeezy and just blatant nudity for the sake of nudity in a kind of really objectifying way.
Really think critically about when they have clothes, when they dont, all of the who why and where details. Like you said you aren't going to worry so much about dealing with tans, Why? What does that save you other than a little story building effort? If you see the flawed logic you have to address it either with the tone/genre (over the top style ridiculous and it doesn't matter) or fix it within the universe. If its a glaring hole your readers will just assume you didn't think about it. Its best to at least have an answer for yourself.
Just repeat to yourself "It's just a show, I should really just relax."
I pinky promise this is not just my vehicle to cleverly add to the mountain of existing thinly veiled softcore porn action comics out there. It's one of my goals to prove that a dude can be trusted with content like this. As far as surfing goes I must politely disagree. I think that particular girl will be okay on those particular waves. But.. In the same breath that I said I wouldn't, I took it back and said I would.
You need to go deeper into this than the casual application of sunblock as a transition tool. For what you want, there should probably be some pretty heavy world building going on, and it sounds like you are still on the fairly superficial side of things (as in what the world looks like, what the characters look like, basic bios and snippets of info) For the kind of universe you are trying to build, it be more interesting if you really dug deep into the cultural meaning of what you are implicating with the nudity, and have a game plan on how you are going to display that through the narrative.
For instance, I'm not really sure why you wouldn't be drawing the pubic hair and nipples now, if you plan to in the future. Now is the time to start figuring out how you want to stylize those details. Don't wait until you are "doing the comic for real" Start pushing the art now. You have some skills, so don't perpetually put off when you are going to "do it" you need to just do it. Start working on the scenes that aren't just your main girl, and post them! You will get more informed feedback from us that way. We are visual people, we crit on what we see.
It's a good example of the ideas I'm fighting against. That I'd have to remove the pink circles to post it in certain places and not in another. That it all depends on how puritan the host is, or how puritan their sponsors are. I dream of a day where these taboos are gone. Obviously when I host my own site, the arbitrary rules are mine to ignore. But for now I gotta play ball. Now I really hope you mean that. Because I do have a whole google doc for this stuff, and plenty of open mode sketches of backstory and supplementary characters. An island city founded on the mythology of old pirates and spiritual surfer culture. But the tl;dr of it all tends to bother people, and I'll get NO response whatsoever after pouring my heart out. The dead silence is the only thing that really gets to me. It's extremely demotivating. I could compile a big matrix of exposition here if you'd like. One person listening makes it worth it.
These forums have an 13+older clause that makes some nudity less kosher than others. I wouldn't be upset at the management for following the standard of affairs.