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[Internet Dating] Bisexuals over 30 without smartphones are doomed. DOOOOOOMED!

13567101

Posts

  • EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    I dislike the pay sites because last time I checked, it's free to make an account but there's no indicator whether someone else has paid. The dynamic ends up being like this:

    1) I create an account and see hundreds of attractive singles.
    2) I find some people I want to message, so I pay money in order to message them.
    3) In order for them to respond, they have to have also paid money. Match doesn't tell me if someone else can pay money, though.
    4) I message people and don't get a response. I'm not sure if it's because they hate me or because they haven't paid money.

    If you can actually FIND someone else who has paid money, I think you're more likely to get an actual date out of it. If you've invested something in dating, you're going to be more willing to meet people and date. No one is paying for a match.com account (or any other paid account) for an ego boost, and in general I think the random-chance people stick to the free sites. As in, people looking for revenge, for a 3rd, for poly stuff, or for a gag/laugh -- they're all staying on OKCupid or the other free sites.

    But paid dating sites have a problem. To be successful, they need to have as many profiles as possible. But for their users to be successful, they need to be a gated community. Obviously, it works for some people, but personally I think it makes more sense to invest your money into something social and local as an effort to meet people.

    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • KyouguKyougu Registered User regular
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

  • SarcasmoBlasterSarcasmoBlaster Austin, TXRegistered User regular
    EggyToast wrote: »
    I dislike the pay sites because last time I checked, it's free to make an account but there's no indicator whether someone else has paid. The dynamic ends up being like this:

    1) I create an account and see hundreds of attractive singles.
    2) I find some people I want to message, so I pay money in order to message them.
    3) In order for them to respond, they have to have also paid money. Match doesn't tell me if someone else can pay money, though.
    4) I message people and don't get a response. I'm not sure if it's because they hate me or because they haven't paid money.

    If you can actually FIND someone else who has paid money, I think you're more likely to get an actual date out of it. If you've invested something in dating, you're going to be more willing to meet people and date. No one is paying for a match.com account (or any other paid account) for an ego boost, and in general I think the random-chance people stick to the free sites. As in, people looking for revenge, for a 3rd, for poly stuff, or for a gag/laugh -- they're all staying on OKCupid or the other free sites.

    But paid dating sites have a problem. To be successful, they need to have as many profiles as possible. But for their users to be successful, they need to be a gated community. Obviously, it works for some people, but personally I think it makes more sense to invest your money into something social and local as an effort to meet people.

    Yeah, I had a Match account for a few months and my response rate was abysmal. Basically, take the (generally) low response rate for dating sites, and then add to it the fact that like 70% of the people you message will not even be able to see your emails.

  • wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    Every once in a while it does this. Shows you the number of people that ranked you 4 or 5 stars and then asks you to sub to see the whole list.

    Psn:wazukki
  • KyouguKyougu Registered User regular
    Just stumbled across this site in someone's profile:

    through-a-friend.com

    They're charging 200 dollars for what this thread does for free. Crazy town.

  • BobbleBobble Registered User regular
    My response rate, rate of getting dates, and the (in my opinion) quality of the dating pool were all better on Match than OKC. Experiences may vary by location.

  • JAEFJAEF Unstoppably Bald Registered User regular
    edited March 2013
    Bobble wrote: »
    My response rate, rate of getting dates, and the (in my opinion) quality of the dating pool were all better on Match than OKC. Experiences may vary by location.
    Age and job also factor a lot into that. If you're a 25-30something living in a rich city with mostly high end jobs (say Irvine, CA) and part of that crowd you're probably going to have a better experience through a place like Match.

    JAEF on
  • fortyforty Registered User regular
    wazilla wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    Every once in a while it does this. Shows you the number of people that ranked you 4 or 5 stars and then asks you to sub to see the whole list.
    That explains why I never see numbers on mine.

  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    Posted in [chat]
    Feral wrote:
    ahahahahahahahaha

    http://userscripts.org/scripts/review/125481

    // ==UserScript==
    // @name          OKCupid Bullshit2English filter
    // @version       1.1
    // @namespace     none
    // @description   Makes OKCupid honest.
    // @updateURL     https://userscripts.org/scripts/source/125481.meta.js
    // @include       http://www.okcupid.com/profile/*
    // ==/UserScript==
    
    // This script uses the Brennus License, which goes like this: "Vae victis."
    
    var okc_word_filter = {
    
      // Ave, Cupidians. Vos morituros saluto. 
    
      // let's start with some simple translations.
      "laid[- ]back": "boring",
      "down[- ]to[\- ]earth": "boring as fuck",
      "love to laugh": "could bore a hole through a bank vault",
      "easy[- ]?going": "apathetic",
    

    it gets better from there...

    sig.gif
  • T-boltT-bolt Registered User regular
    Someone who says in her profile that she works at POF visited my profile. I remembered she also has a profile on OKC. On POF her profile states she's in a relationship and not looking to date, and she has an account for testing purposes. On OKC, she's "single." Must be doing her part to undermine the competition, that or not so secretly looking to trade up from her bf.

  • JeedanJeedan Registered User regular
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    I've got a date with a new girl on Sunday.

    sig.gif
  • wiltingwilting I had fun once and it was awful Registered User regular
    edited March 2013
    I've been pondering getting back into the internet dating thing for a while.

    The thing that last put me off was the pressure to self aggrandize. I just got really fed up with the nonsense I was spinning, or the stupid message conversations I was creating in an attempt to be 'interesting.' Can I just be normal? I'm mostly referring to this notion of an extroverted ideal, where I feel like I have to portray myself as an ultimate witty charm machine hyper social all the time always, when I'm more of a chill socialize when I feckin feel like it type.

    I mean I don't want my profile to have a 'real me' complex ... but at the same time I am tired of the facade.

    My profile needs to be edited down for simplicity/updated for sure ... and I should probably come up with activity photos other than drinking.

    I mean, I get it, you are trying to sell yourself, but you aren't going to be attracting the right people if you aren't putting in accurate info about yourself. Where do you strike the balance between presenting who you are, who you want to be, and what you think you 'need' to be to be 'successful'? Not just in profile, but in messages, and even dates?

    Who the hell am I anyway? Maybe I should ask my friends (hurr).

    Also, any thoughts whether upgrading to the payed OKCupid membership is worth it?

    wilting on
  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    If you're going to pay for it, pay once, then never again. The mailbox expansion is permanent, but all the other features have highly varying levels of utility.

  • wiltingwilting I had fun once and it was awful Registered User regular
    edited March 2013
    Don't think I need the mailbox expansion, can only sustain so many messages before I need a break. I mostly interested in the ability to see who ranked you highly, being able see visitors without being seen yourself, things like that. But yeah, I'd be inclined to pay once off. I mean, either I succeed in my goal of a relationship or I'll get fed up with the whole thing again after a while.

    Quite often I would send a finely tuned message designed to grab as much attention as possible, and I get a fairly enthusiastic response, but then I don't respond back, because I feel like the whole conversation is false and stupid.

    wilting on
  • wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    Jeedan wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

    Am I the only one that gets an email whenever someone rates me highly telling me exactly who it is?

    Psn:wazukki
  • JeedanJeedan Registered User regular
    wazilla wrote: »
    Jeedan wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

    Am I the only one that gets an email whenever someone rates me highly telling me exactly who it is?

    I get that too but it doesn't happen 100% of the time.

  • wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    Jeedan wrote: »
    wazilla wrote: »
    Jeedan wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

    Am I the only one that gets an email whenever someone rates me highly telling me exactly who it is?

    I get that too but it doesn't happen 100% of the time.

    Wait, so even more people love me than I thought previously? This is great news!

    Psn:wazukki
  • BobbleBobble Registered User regular
    edited March 2013
    Does this strike anyone else as odd?
    Movies: Way too many to name! I love watching movies. *rattles off a huge list of movies*

    Shows: I rarely watch tv.... I'd rather be doing other things with my time.


    wazilla wrote: »
    Jeedan wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

    Am I the only one that gets an email whenever someone rates me highly telling me exactly who it is?

    Happens each time as far as I know, but then I'm not sure how else I'd notice a rating.

    Bobble on
  • MahnmutMahnmut Registered User regular
    Richy wrote: »
    Posted in [chat]
    Feral wrote:
    ahahahahahahahaha

    http://userscripts.org/scripts/review/125481

    // ==UserScript==
    // @name          OKCupid Bullshit2English filter
    // @version       1.1
    // @namespace     none
    // @description   Makes OKCupid honest.
    // @updateURL     https://userscripts.org/scripts/source/125481.meta.js
    // @include       http://www.okcupid.com/profile/*
    // ==/UserScript==
    
    // This script uses the Brennus License, which goes like this: "Vae victis."
    
    var okc_word_filter = {
    
      // Ave, Cupidians. Vos morituros saluto. 
    
      // let's start with some simple translations.
      "laid[- ]back": "boring",
      "down[- ]to[\- ]earth": "boring as fuck",
      "love to laugh": "could bore a hole through a bank vault",
      "easy[- ]?going": "apathetic",
    

    it gets better from there...
    // ... crush ... crush the nerd-speakers ...
      "full of win": "full of centipedes, much like my anal cavity", 
    
      // ... once roused, Nerdsbane rests only over the wedgied bodies of his enemies ...
      "epic win": "much like the time when Achilles stabbed his spear through the craven throat of Hector,\
     and ground his skull to paste beneath his heel, then dragged his defeated corpse through the dirt to leave a \
     testament of blood and maggots, telling the folly of opposing the peerless son of Peleus",
    
      // ...only the tears of smug pseudointellectuals can douse the flame of the Nerdsbane's wrath...
      "epic fail": "an act as vain as the wretch Turnus' worthless struggle against divine Aeneas, and equally worthy of anger at\
     the gutless gods who let one live so long in such a wretched life",
    

    8->

    Steam/LoL: Jericho89
  • EggyToastEggyToast Jersey CityRegistered User regular
    Bobble wrote: »
    Does this strike anyone else as odd?
    Movies: Way too many to name! I love watching movies. *rattles off a huge list of movies*

    Shows: I rarely watch tv.... I'd rather be doing other things with my time.

    No, that's me. Instead of watching TV, I'd rather be doing other things with my time, like watching a movie.

    In general, though, this means the person isn't into sitcoms, reality TV, or other open-ended weekly shows. They like stories that have a finished conclusion. I find that people who aren't into TV are OK with series that have been finished, depending on the time.

    Still, I can watch a LONG movie in 3 hours. If I want to watch BSG, that's 53 hours. Fans would say that it's some of the best 53 hours of visual media, but that's a HUGE time commitment.
    wilting wrote: »
    I've been pondering getting back into the internet dating thing for a while.

    The thing that last put me off was the pressure to self aggrandize. I just got really fed up with the nonsense I was spinning, or the stupid message conversations I was creating in an attempt to be 'interesting.' Can I just be normal? I'm mostly referring to this notion of an extroverted ideal, where I feel like I have to portray myself as an ultimate witty charm machine hyper social all the time always, when I'm more of a chill socialize when I feckin feel like it type.

    I mean I don't want my profile to have a 'real me' complex ... but at the same time I am tired of the facade.

    My profile needs to be edited down for simplicity/updated for sure ... and I should probably come up with activity photos other than drinking.

    I mean, I get it, you are trying to sell yourself, but you aren't going to be attracting the right people if you aren't putting in accurate info about yourself. Where do you strike the balance between presenting who you are, who you want to be, and what you think you 'need' to be to be 'successful'? Not just in profile, but in messages, and even dates?

    Who the hell am I anyway? Maybe I should ask my friends (hurr).

    You should always present who you are. The problem is that often people don't realize who they are, like you point out. If you feel that it's a facade, why are you expressing something that's fake? If you think your life is so boring, why are you trying to force your boring-ass life on someone else? What is it that you want out of a relationship? Someone to share your misery?

    It's not about finding a balance; it's about expressing the positive things in your life that get you up every day, the things you look forward to, and the things that excite you. You need to think about how you'd share your life with someone, and focus on those elements. It's like this -- let's say you play poker but you don't play with women, just your guy friends. Imagine this on a profile:

    About Me: I love to play poker but don't even ask if you can play with me because I'm not going to let you.

    Pretty standoffish and sounds dumb, right? Yet people put shit like that in their profiles ALL THE TIME. It's not lying to omit the things you prefer to do by yourself; it's honest. You don't want to share those things with a partner, so don't bring it up. Talk about the things you'd want to actually do with a boyfriend or girlfriend, and what it is you currently do that would mesh well with a partner.

    || Flickr — || PSN: EggyToast
  • wiltingwilting I had fun once and it was awful Registered User regular
    Thanks Eggy, that's an excellent point about things you would like to do with a partner, I might work that angle in a bit more. Looking at my profile, it does a better job of honestly presenting myself positively than I remembered, mostly just needs editing for length.

  • KyouguKyougu Registered User regular
    Jeedan wrote: »
    wazilla wrote: »
    Jeedan wrote: »
    Kyougu wrote: »
    Did anyone's Quickmatch suddenly start showing numbers, which are assume are new people rating highly?

    I'm cautious, wondering if this is some sort of way for Okcupid to get me to pony up money.

    They're the amount of people who have rated you highly recently. you can see the full list if you're A-list.

    If you want to find out for free though just do quickmatch, the system is highly weighted so they'll be in the first few matches.

    Am I the only one that gets an email whenever someone rates me highly telling me exactly who it is?

    I get that too but it doesn't happen 100% of the time.

    I looked at my quick match, rated a couple of people highly who were at the start and got an email telling me me and someone else had rated each other highly.

  • rizriz Registered User regular
    EggyToast wrote: »
    Pretty standoffish and sounds dumb, right? Yet people put shit like that in their profiles ALL THE TIME.

    It is amazing the things people think are okay to put out there. I mean even beyond the "why do women only want assholes" nonsense.

  • fortyforty Registered User regular
    EggyToast wrote: »
    Talk about the things you'd want to actually do with a boyfriend or girlfriend, and what it is you currently do that would mesh well with a partner.
    Like sex.

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    I don't think I'm allowed to sleep tonight. Dropping off to sleep at my laptop I get woken up by a message saying "Horny?" which is just delightful. Dropping off to sleep again just now and the airing cupboard door opened and I'm alone and maybe I should have said yes to the random internet man just to protect me from the monster in the airing cupboard. Not at all freaking out here, nopes I'm fine.

  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    The monster in the airing cupboard just wants to talk. All the other monsters are dreadful conversationalists.

  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    I don't think I'm allowed to sleep tonight. Dropping off to sleep at my laptop I get woken up by a message saying "Horny?" which is just delightful. Dropping off to sleep again just now and the airing cupboard door opened and I'm alone and maybe I should have said yes to the random internet man just to protect me from the monster in the airing cupboard. Not at all freaking out here, nopes I'm fine.

    Maybe turn off your phone/laptop before you go to sleep?

    sig.gif
  • Mr_GrinchMr_Grinch Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    I don't think I'm allowed to sleep tonight. Dropping off to sleep at my laptop I get woken up by a message saying "Horny?" which is just delightful. Dropping off to sleep again just now and the airing cupboard door opened and I'm alone and maybe I should have said yes to the random internet man just to protect me from the monster in the airing cupboard. Not at all freaking out here, nopes I'm fine.

    Maybe the creature in the cupboard sent the message?

    If so it owes you for your wifi.

    Steam: Sir_Grinch
    PSN: SirGrinchX
    Oculus Rift: Sir_Grinch
  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    I survived the night and now I have my dog to protect me tonight. Is there some sort of romantic holiday coming up? I'm getting a lot of messages this week like I did just before Valentine's day. "you brighten up an otherwise dreary day x" is a short but sweet one. Then there was this...

    Pretty woman with the enigmatic smile,

    “It's beauty that captures your attention; personality which captures your heart”. Oscar Wilde

    Are you blessed with both? If so, I would like to meet you.

    Can you tell me who said: "Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realise why it never worked out with anyone else".

    Kindest regards,

    Dr Tom (not his username, which is far worse)

  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    You need to start a tumblr. Call it something like, "Misadventures in Internet Romance, or: Every Awful Thing You Suspected About Online Dating Is True".

  • wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    Dr. Tom, Murderist Extraordinaire.

    Psn:wazukki
  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    The Importance of Being Dr. Tom

  • fortyforty Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    I survived the night and now I have my dog to protect me tonight. Is there some sort of romantic holiday coming up?
    St. Patrick's Day? That's a romantic holiday for drunks, probably more so in the UK.

  • KalgarethKalgareth Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    Is there some sort of romantic holiday coming up?

    International Women's Day.

  • FiatilFiatil Registered User regular
    I need some wisdom from the thread. I messaged someone on OKCupid last week and got a response, but her profile was fairly bare-bones and I couldn't really think of a good follow-up to her message and the conversation died out. Fast forward to last night and I'm going with a buddy to some girl's birthday party after work, aaand guess who the birthday girl is? She didn't recognize me beyond a "I know I know you from somewhere!" sort of deal, and both of us were too drunk for me to want to do the explanation of "oh yeah I messaged you on okcupid once hayy whats up!" We hit it off pretty well though, and I'm curious how to follow up on it. Should I shoot her another message on OKCupid and be all "Hey now I know where I recognized you from! You seem really cool we should grab lunch!" or just wait for another in person meeting and see what happens? I was invited to another party at their place on Wednesday, so assuming that doesn't fall through it looks like I have a few different ways to approach it.

  • RichyRichy Registered User regular
    Fiatil wrote: »
    I need some wisdom from the thread. I messaged someone on OKCupid last week and got a response, but her profile was fairly bare-bones and I couldn't really think of a good follow-up to her message and the conversation died out. Fast forward to last night and I'm going with a buddy to some girl's birthday party after work, aaand guess who the birthday girl is? She didn't recognize me beyond a "I know I know you from somewhere!" sort of deal, and both of us were too drunk for me to want to do the explanation of "oh yeah I messaged you on okcupid once hayy whats up!" We hit it off pretty well though, and I'm curious how to follow up on it. Should I shoot her another message on OKCupid and be all "Hey now I know where I recognized you from! You seem really cool we should grab lunch!" or just wait for another in person meeting and see what happens? I was invited to another party at their place on Wednesday, so assuming that doesn't fall through it looks like I have a few different ways to approach it.

    I would use the in-person approach.

    1. It's way more personal and effective communication than messaging through a website.

    2. The messaging through website approach has already been tried and failed, while you hit it off in person.

    3. Girls get dozens of messages through dating websites at once. If you're talking to her in person, odds are there aren't a dozen other people around vying for her attention at the same time, some of them with their pants down showing off their bacon sandwich.

    sig.gif
  • wazillawazilla Having a late dinner Registered User regular
    edited March 2013
    2nd date in a row I've been bailed on :(

    Maybe I should go for something even more informal than coffee.

    Like, I could schedule a time where we can both be walking down the same street in opposite directions

    And I could smile at her

    And then she could pretend not to see me

    And then she could text me later and tell me how it went.

    wazilla on
    Psn:wazukki
  • kaliyamakaliyama Left to find less-moderated fora Registered User regular
    EggyToast wrote: »
    I dislike the pay sites because last time I checked, it's free to make an account but there's no indicator whether someone else has paid. The dynamic ends up being like this:

    1) I create an account and see hundreds of attractive singles.
    2) I find some people I want to message, so I pay money in order to message them.
    3) In order for them to respond, they have to have also paid money. Match doesn't tell me if someone else can pay money, though.
    4) I message people and don't get a response. I'm not sure if it's because they hate me or because they haven't paid money.

    If you can actually FIND someone else who has paid money, I think you're more likely to get an actual date out of it. If you've invested something in dating, you're going to be more willing to meet people and date. No one is paying for a match.com account (or any other paid account) for an ego boost, and in general I think the random-chance people stick to the free sites. As in, people looking for revenge, for a 3rd, for poly stuff, or for a gag/laugh -- they're all staying on OKCupid or the other free sites.

    But paid dating sites have a problem. To be successful, they need to have as many profiles as possible. But for their users to be successful, they need to be a gated community. Obviously, it works for some people, but personally I think it makes more sense to invest your money into something social and local as an effort to meet people.

    Yeah, I had a Match account for a few months and my response rate was abysmal. Basically, take the (generally) low response rate for dating sites, and then add to it the fact that like 70% of the people you message will not even be able to see your emails.

    @EggyToast, can't you sort by recent activity on match? That should get over your problem. The last girl I dated there was a willowy six foot redhead animator with a southern accent that, regrettably and improbably, failed to be crazy at all and so I rapidly lost interest.

    I did find though that match.com people tended to be employed instead of fuckups or aspiring actresses or cheerful girls pursuing a masters in public health to delay reality or in the hopes of getting a joint MPH-MRS degree.

    fwKS7.png?1
  • FiatilFiatil Registered User regular
    Richy wrote: »
    Fiatil wrote: »
    I need some wisdom from the thread. I messaged someone on OKCupid last week and got a response, but her profile was fairly bare-bones and I couldn't really think of a good follow-up to her message and the conversation died out. Fast forward to last night and I'm going with a buddy to some girl's birthday party after work, aaand guess who the birthday girl is? She didn't recognize me beyond a "I know I know you from somewhere!" sort of deal, and both of us were too drunk for me to want to do the explanation of "oh yeah I messaged you on okcupid once hayy whats up!" We hit it off pretty well though, and I'm curious how to follow up on it. Should I shoot her another message on OKCupid and be all "Hey now I know where I recognized you from! You seem really cool we should grab lunch!" or just wait for another in person meeting and see what happens? I was invited to another party at their place on Wednesday, so assuming that doesn't fall through it looks like I have a few different ways to approach it.

    I would use the in-person approach.

    1. It's way more personal and effective communication than messaging through a website.

    2. The messaging through website approach has already been tried and failed, while you hit it off in person.

    3. Girls get dozens of messages through dating websites at once. If you're talking to her in person, odds are there aren't a dozen other people around vying for her attention at the same time, some of them with their pants down showing off their bacon sandwich.

    Think I should mention the message at all? Haha she may realize who I am too in a less drunk state/after browsing OKCupid some more, ya think it's alright to just let it lay and just assume she doesn't care enough that it will be an issue that I "hid" it?

This discussion has been closed.