As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/

Firefly: The Phalla! [Good Guys Win: You can't take the sky from me]

PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
edited August 2007 in Critical Failures
CargoBay.jpg

“Well, this is a pretty gorram curious turn of events,” Mal exclaimed to nobody in particular, drawing his pistol and taking cover behind a pile of crates in Serenity’s cargo bay.

“We saw some pretty strange stuff during the war Sir, but I ain’t never heard of a coincidence like this one,” remarked his first mate, Zoe, while she wedged herself behind a metal outcropping on the edge of the room.

“What the hell Wash, you gorram idiot! How did all of them get aboard without you picking it up on the sensors, you stupid bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway ro!,” Jayne vulgarly screamed, hefting Vera, only his most favorite gun in the whole universe.

“Are you going to let him say that about me, honey?” Wash hastily yelled down from the cockpit while initiating takeoff procedures, quickly accelerating into space.

“For once I agree with the meathead, you do need to stop playing with those toy dinosaurs and fly the ship once in a while.” Shouted back Zoe, her words neatly punctuated with shots from her gun, to make sure that the intruders were keeping their heads down.

“What’s all that ruckus down there fellows,” called out Inara, peeking out over the edge of the railing above the hold, only to have her words cut short by a hail of bullets as she ducked away in terror.

It was a pretty huge coincidence that at this moment in time, the Serenity was boarded by not just one, but six different enemies, all with their own motives, but sharing the same interests – mainly, the death of the crew – both the three they were engaged in a gunbattle with, and the remaining crewmembers – Simon, River, Book, Kaylee, Wash, and Inara, who at the present moment were trying to barricade themselves in their respective bunks.

“Wot in the BLOODY ‘ELL is goin’ on ‘ere.” Screamed out Badger, striding up to the railing above the combatants, seemingly uncaring about any bullets that may be heading his way.. “That’s me stuff you’re putting bullets into!”

“Just stuff, Badger,” shouted back Mal. “You can always get more”

“No you blithering idiot, one o’ those crates I’m paying you to transport is full o’ some dang’rous gas that might just KILL us all, the rest are just d’versions.”

With that, the shooting suddenly ceased, or at least it did for a second, until Jayne, his tongue poking our the side of his mouth in a curious smile, squeezed off a single shot, which impacted with a curious thunk, and a low hiss of excaping gas.

Slowly, the air in the Serenity took on a pale tinge, as the gas diffused throughout all the air in the ship.

“What is this stuff Badger?,” everybody within earshot simultaneously yelled.

“I don’ know, it’s jus’ some prototype stuff that Patience wanted me to steal for ‘er. I nicked it from some heavily guarded Blue Sun reasarch lab. It seems pretty gorram harmless, because we’re not dead yet.”

“It’s the PAX,” camly spoke the Operative, the first words out of his mouth the whole time during the fight. “The formula hasn’t been finalized yet, but it’s meant to suppress violence and institute calm and logic among a rebellious population.”

“Well that explains why I don’t want to kill you just now,” said Mal, visibly calmer. “I mean, I want all of you intruders dead, but I just don’t want to kill you just yet”

This seemed to be the general consensus among both the crewmembers and the intruders, who all seemed to have dropped their weapons and met in the center of the Cargo bay, forming a neat circle with Mal at the center.

“Here’s how we’ll settle this here dispute,” started Mal. “Every day, we’ll decide to vote for somebody to throw into the black, instead of just killing everyone here and now in a bloodbath. That way, nobody will have to clean up the mess. It will be all organized and democratic, just like you alliance-types like it.”

Thus began day one of Firefly: The Phalla.

Plutonium on
«13456714

Posts

  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007

    Day 1 Narration

    Day 2 Narration
    Day 3 Narration


    Players:

    Ardor (Operative)
    Balefuego (Wash)
    Buzz Buzz
    Cj Iwakura (Mal)
    DevoutlyApathetic (Saffron)
    Drez
    FunkyWaltDogg
    Grundlterror
    Hakkekage (Kaylee)
    Hylianbunny (Simon)
    Jdarksun (River)
    Jester313
    Squashua (Jubal Early)
    TehSpectre
    Thorgot (Hands of Blue)
    Visiblehowl

    Roles:

    Good Guys
    Malcolm “Mal” Reynolds
    Hoban “Wash” Washburn
    Zoe Alleyn Washburn
    Inara Serra
    Kaywinnit Lee “Kaylee” Frye
    Jayne Cobb
    Simon Tam
    River Tam
    Shepherd Derrial Book

    Bad Guys
    Adelei Niska
    Saffron
    Hands of Blue #1
    Hands of Blue #2
    Jubal Early
    The Operative

    Neutral
    Badger

    Rules:

    Every day, everyone will !Vote on who to throw out of the airlock.
    Retractions are made like this
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped.

    All deadlines for role abilities and the vote will be Midnight EST, which is 9:00 PST for me. I’ll try to have the narrations up at maximum within the hour following votes closing.

    The first vote begins right now, and ends one day from now – Wednesday night.

    Public questions should be asked like this
    Private questions should be sent as PM's.

    No anonymous contacting.
    All offsite boards used for networking purposes must be open to my inspection.
    Please be active and vote every day.
    Participation is awesome, and you will be replaced if you cannot effectively participate.
    Please do be creative with your language. A guide to basic firefly-chinese can be found here. Instead of “cool,” “great,” or “awesome,” try to use “Shiny.” Call Mal “Cap’n Tightpants.” Have fun Browncoats!

    Plutonium on
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    New av, just in time!

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    !vote Jester313

    He hasn't posted yet. He's obviously trying to lay low.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I've got so many grudges queued up, I scarcely know where to begin.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Thread's up? Shiny.

    You're a bit eager to point and shoot, aren't you, Drez? Give him a chance already.

    Can't say that I see anyone I have a grudge against, personally.

    Hylianbunny on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    That's a good point Drez, he's had 2 whole posts to post in.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Six now. Fucking Mr. Blue Hands bastard.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Thread's up? Shiny.

    You're a bit eager to point and shoot, aren't you, Drez? Give him a chance already.

    Can't say that I see anyone I have a grudge against, personally.

    I believe in shooting first...and shooting later.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I hope all of you guys like your Role Pm's, because I went on a writing bender setting this all up. The word file for this game is at 13 pages right now.

    Plutonium on
  • ArdorArdor Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Thread's up? Shiny.

    You're a bit eager to point and shoot, aren't you, Drez? Give him a chance already.

    Can't say that I see anyone I have a grudge against, personally.

    I believe in shooting first...and shooting later.

    Don't bring a knife to a gunfight eh?

    Take this Drezlar.

    Don't write me back will you? This is all with vengeance.

    Ardor on
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    There's a perfectly rational way to do this, you know.

    If you're not crew, get off.

    Hylianbunny on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    There's a perfectly rational way to do this, you know.

    If you're not crew, get off.

    :winky: That's rather selfish of you, isn't it? :winky:

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    All of this fighting is just going to get us all killed, and it would be nice to skip that part.

    Hylianbunny on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    All of this fighting is just going to get us all killed, and it would be nice to skip that part.

    Oh, why don't we just make a bronze statue of you and shove your yappity-yappity piehole out the airlock with the rest of ya.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Plutonium wrote: »
    I hope all of you guys like your Role Pm's, because I went on a writing bender setting this all up. The word file for this game is at 13 pages right now.

    Loves me a good .txt file. Plain text feels easier to import/post. Just like rock when doing the paper-scissors thing, text always wins. And it's Linux-compatible.

    Might want to send out a little PM to all the players (looks like a cozy crew of vets here) and give 'em all a "head's up" to this thread.

    Squashua on
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    I sent everyone one this morning saying that the role pm's and game thread would go up tonight.

    And yeah, seeing as how this is almost all vets, I expect participation.

    Plutonium on
  • SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Plutonium wrote: »
    I sent everyone one this morning saying that the role pm's and game thread would go up tonight.

    By "head's up", I meant a link.

    Geo-shung yong-jur goo-jang. Jien-cha yong-chi gong yin.

    Squashua on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    The handsome Squashua's got a point. This whole space travel thing is so confusing and complicated.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Argh, fine!

    Plutonium on
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Anyone care to speculate on what each role might be able to do?

    Hylianbunny on
  • SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    The handsome Squashua's got a point. This whole space travel thing is so confusing and complicated.

    Hush, Saffron. A woman knows her place.

    Squashua on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Squashua wrote: »
    Hush, Saffron. A woman knows her place.
    You're missing the massive amount of sarcasm present in the statement Squashua.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • SquashuaSquashua __BANNED USERS regular
    edited August 2007
    Squashua wrote: »
    Hush, Saffron. A woman knows her place.
    You're missing the massive amount of sarcasm present in the statement Squashua.

    And you're missing a comma.

    Squashua on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Squashua wrote: »
    And you're missing a comma.
    Can we kill early season Simon here? I now he's "good" but he's going to get on all our nerves quite a bit.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Squashua wrote: »
    And you're missing a comma.
    Can we kill early season Simon here? I now he's "good" but he's going to get on all our nerves quite a bit.

    Technically, we don't know around when this'd take place. So for all we know, he's early or late season Simon.

    Hylianbunny on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Squashua wrote: »
    And you're missing a comma.
    Can we kill early season Simon here? I now he's "good" but he's going to get on all our nerves quite a bit.

    Technically, we don't know around when this'd take place. So for all we know, he's early or late season Simon.

    Can we just kill Squashua?

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • HylianbunnyHylianbunny Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Squashua wrote: »
    And you're missing a comma.
    Can we kill early season Simon here? I now he's "good" but he's going to get on all our nerves quite a bit.

    Technically, we don't know around when this'd take place. So for all we know, he's early or late season Simon.

    Can we just kill Squashua?

    If you insist, I suppose.

    Let's get this out of the way early. Clarification: what happens if a tie vote is reached?

    Hylianbunny on
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped

    Plutonium on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Plutonium wrote: »
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped

    Clarification: Does the coin flip have anything to do with which person involved in the tie dies?
    Clarification 2: What kind of coin will you use if the tie goes more than two ways?
    Clarification 3: On a scale of 0 to 777, how annoying were these clarification questions?

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Huh. I don't remember any of the bad guys, so it's probably time for me to rewatch the series.

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Plutonium wrote: »
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped

    Clarification: Does the coin flip have anything to do with which person involved in the tie dies?
    Clarification 2: What kind of coin will you use if the tie goes more than two ways?
    Clarification 3: On a scale of 0 to 777, how annoying were these clarification questions?

    Asteroids fall, everybody decompresses explosively.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Drez wrote: »
    Plutonium wrote: »
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped

    Clarification: Does the coin flip have anything to do with which person involved in the tie dies?
    Clarification 2: What kind of coin will you use if the tie goes more than two ways?
    Clarification 3: On a scale of 0 to 777, how annoying were these clarification questions?

    In the event of a tie of a player with Drez, Drez will die instead of them

    edit: not really

    Plutonium on
  • ArdorArdor Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Nice, we aim for the tie with Drez! Everyone wins!

    Ardor on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Plutonium wrote: »
    Drez wrote: »
    Plutonium wrote: »
    In the event of a tie, a coin will be flipped

    Clarification: Does the coin flip have anything to do with which person involved in the tie dies?
    Clarification 2: What kind of coin will you use if the tie goes more than two ways?
    Clarification 3: On a scale of 0 to 777, how annoying were these clarification questions?

    In the event of a tie of a player with Drez, Drez will die instead of them

    browbeaten.jpg

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    thorgot wrote: »
    Huh. I don't remember any of the bad guys, so it's probably time for me to rewatch the series.

    Adelei Niska:
    The businessman / torture junkie who lives on a space station. They do a mission for him but bail at the last minute, and in a later episode he catches Mal and Wash.
    Saffron:
    Mal's "wife", who is also a trained Companion and a regular bitch. And a big liar.
    Hands of Blue:
    The guys who are after River. In the hospital episode, they're the dudes with the blue gloves and the device with the killing sound.
    Jubal Early:
    A bounty hunter sent to retrieve River, who sneaks onto Serenity in the last episode.
    The Operative:
    From the movie. He's another guy tasked with retrieving River (and the secrets she holds), but he's pretty unremarkable in my opinion.

    That's all from memory, so feel free to correct me.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Bears The Name FreedomRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Well, I'm not in 'character' for this one yet, but the pet one ought to be done soon anyway.

    I've only seen Serenity.

    Is that forgivable?

    And The Operative must be very dangerous. Probably gets an extra kill.

    cj iwakura on
    wVEsyIc.png
  • PlutoniumPlutonium Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    cj iwakura wrote: »
    Well, I'm not in 'character' for this one yet, but the pet one ought to be done soon anyway.

    I've only seen Serenity.

    Is that forgivable.

    Barely.

    Plutonium on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited August 2007
    cj iwakura wrote: »
    Well, I'm not in 'character' for this one yet, but the pet one ought to be done soon anyway.

    I've only seen Serenity.

    Is that forgivable?

    I will answer like so: Cj Iwakura

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Bears The Name FreedomRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Hey, I'll watch the show eventually. Better late than never.

    cj iwakura on
    wVEsyIc.png
  • HakkekageHakkekage Space Whore Academy summa cum laudeRegistered User regular
    edited August 2007
    Ok ok I'm done with clearing up the Mini-Phalla, so here I am.

    Also what a coincidence, I finally went to Target and bought the Firefly box set today. Huzzah!

    Also what a coincidence, I'LL KILL YOU TEHSPECTRE

    !kill TehSpectre, draw him, quarter him, bite him, rip him apart!

    Hakkekage on
    3DS: 2165 - 6538 - 3417
    NNID: Hakkekage
Sign In or Register to comment.