The art us really great. My only complaint is that some of the choices feel inconsequential.
Thanks for the feedback dude
I can tell you that your choices are having a lot of impact behind the scenes. Depending on how you treated Paul, the choices you made, and what you had to drink, the story would have turned out differently. One possible route was turning into a ghoul, for instance.
Would it feel more impactful if I made a note of +relationship with characters, or other similar things?
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Rear Admiral ChocoI wanna be an owl, Jerry!Owl York CityRegistered Userregular
The art us really great. My only complaint is that some of the choices feel inconsequential.
Thanks for the feedback dude
I can tell you that your choices are having a lot of impact behind the scenes. Depending on how you treated Paul, the choices you made, and what you had to drink, the story would have turned out differently. One possible route was turning into a ghoul, for instance.
Would it feel more impactful if I made a note of +relationship with characters, or other similar things?
I have a big boner for random points and values so even regardless of the meaning I would be all over this
The art us really great. My only complaint is that some of the choices feel inconsequential.
Thanks for the feedback dude
I can tell you that your choices are having a lot of impact behind the scenes. Depending on how you treated Paul, the choices you made, and what you had to drink, the story would have turned out differently. One possible route was turning into a ghoul, for instance.
Would it feel more impactful if I made a note of +relationship with characters, or other similar things?
To be fair I was reaching a little bit because I know I always appreciate constructive criticism. Given what you're saying, that some of the decisions will have more subtle long term effects, I'm fine with what you're doing. I actually looked through the thread and the only decision that seemed to make no difference was this latest one since we got rescued(?) before we could hear about our friends. With hindsight and your explanation I can see how what seemed like minor decisions led us to where we are. I'm fine without seeing relationship stats, but it'll be cool when we see early decisions hurt/help us.
Also, I liked how the tie actually got us a combined response.
You're lying in a makeshift cot. You recognize where you are. You're in the office of The Anvil. It's night. You dig out your phone and check the date. You went out clubbing on a Saturday; it's now Sunday night. You try to sit up. A hand on your shoulder steadies you. It's Paul.
"Hey Frances." His voice is calm. "I need to ask you some questions. Can we talk for a bit?"
1) "I think you should be answering my questions."
2) "We can talk."
Can we go for a third option? Something less combative then 1, but less submitting to an interrogation then 2. 3) "Yeah, I've got some questions I'd like to ask too..."
I'd rather have a conversation rather then an interrogation
Paul makes a face. "Look, this is my fault - I'm really, really sorry that I got you into this. I should have kept mortals out of it, I was just lonely and -- Well, that's not answering your question." He clears his throat. "Uh, you're a vampire now. You're hungry because you can't eat food any more. You need blood. Don't worry! I'll teach you how to hunt."
"Your friends were also turned. The guy who turned you, your sire, he was one of the vampires who ran Warehouse 12. He was planning on giving your friends up as foot soldiers in the war we're fighting in exchange for entry into the Sabbat. This is my fault - I can't apologize enough. They knew that you worked here, at the Anvil. They thought that we knew they were about to betray the Anarchs, since we're affiliated with the Camarilla. They were going to hurt you and your friends. I couldn't allow that. I'm not good in a fist fight, and I'm a shitty shot, but a flamethrower? I can handle that."
What's all this crazy talk about some Camarilla and Sabbat thing?
"It's our society. It's the Masquerade. Most vampires want to live along side humans - we feed on them, some of us fuck them, we need them. But in order for that relationship to continue, we have to stay on the down low. We hide our fangs. We erase every trace of our existence. We follow human laws and avoid their attention. The Anarchs, well, they agree with us on that, but they don't like the way we run things. They're big on democracy and freedom and all that. They're fine - I don't mind the Anarchs. You can trust them. The Sabbat are the real bad apples. They think that we should rule over humans, conquer them. They think they're an army." Paul sighs heavily. "They're trying to get their claws into Toronto. We may have to fight a war. I am so, so sorry I brought you into this world, Frances. But we can't change my mistakes, so I want to help you survive."
Paul shakes his head. "I know it's difficult to take in. It was even harder for me." He gestures at his face. "I'm a Nos - a Nosferatu. We're cursed with hideous faces. Your sire wasn't. So, you've got that over me." He grins, showing toothy fangs. You remember that the barman had fangs too and immediately pop a finger into your mouth.
Sure enough, your canines have grown and are so sharp that you almost break the skin on your finger. You pull your finger back out.
"Yeah, that's part of the deal." Paul says. "It's so you can feed, you have to break the skin. But you can see yourself in a mirror, you show up on cameras, and you don't need an invitation to get into a house. You are flammable, though. Very, very flammable."
Kind of freak out
You open your mouth and all that comes out is "aaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"
Paul takes you by the shoulders and looks you in the eye. "I know this is scary. But you're not alone. I'm with you. I'll help you. Okay? You're going to be fine."
"Yes. We're trying to introduce you to the bad news one on one. It's... a little chaotic otherwise."
Why the hell was I sent there?
"We didn't know that they were Sabbat. We thought it was an Anarch club. We were expecting you to come back, a little hungover but none the worse for wear, and tell us about their club. We didn't know it was dangerous. Again, I'm sorry. I thought working with mortals would be safer - that the other vamps in the city would respect the Masquerade. I didn't expect the Sabbat. None of us did. This is an act of war on their part."
"Tonight, we need to talk to the Prince. We're all going to go together - Elaine will hold down the fort, but I'm bringing you and your friends to the Prince. He's the head honcho - the guy who runs the show. But first, I need to ask you some questions about last night. Is that okay?"
1) "Yes."
2) "Can we see the Prince first?"
3) "No."
Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
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vertroueI am FemaleTotes Not a SithRegistered Userregular
1) "Yes."
Blood and Fire
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
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jakobaggerLO THY DREAD EMPIRE CHAOS IS RESTOREDRegistered Userregular
"Concentrate. Think hard. Your sire, was he the man at the bar?"
You puzzle over it a while. So much of the other night is a blur... "No, I was drinking and talking to someone else, another man. He was..."
1) He was passionate - the sort of man who can handle himself in a fight.
2) He was a loner - the sort of man who would be comfortable in the wilderness.
3) He was cultured - an aficionado of art and culture. He was charming, but manipulative.
4) He was intelligent - it seemed as though he had hidden knowledge at his finger tips.
5) He was ambitious - he clearly wanted to become powerful through politics.
This is an important decision, so voting will be open for a while.
Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
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vertroueI am FemaleTotes Not a SithRegistered Userregular
He was intelligent - it seemed as though he had hidden knowledge at his finger tips.
Blood and Fire
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
Posts
Thanks for the feedback dude
I can tell you that your choices are having a lot of impact behind the scenes. Depending on how you treated Paul, the choices you made, and what you had to drink, the story would have turned out differently. One possible route was turning into a ghoul, for instance.
Would it feel more impactful if I made a note of +relationship with characters, or other similar things?
I have a big boner for random points and values so even regardless of the meaning I would be all over this
To be fair I was reaching a little bit because I know I always appreciate constructive criticism. Given what you're saying, that some of the decisions will have more subtle long term effects, I'm fine with what you're doing. I actually looked through the thread and the only decision that seemed to make no difference was this latest one since we got rescued(?) before we could hear about our friends. With hindsight and your explanation I can see how what seemed like minor decisions led us to where we are. I'm fine without seeing relationship stats, but it'll be cool when we see early decisions hurt/help us.
Also, I liked how the tie actually got us a combined response.
PSN: Boozer_777
WHEN DO WE GET GUNS
WHAT KIND OF GAME IS THIS WITHOUT GUNS
I WANT REFUND
This is a great concept for a CYOA. The art looks lovely.
You're lying in a makeshift cot. You recognize where you are. You're in the office of The Anvil. It's night. You dig out your phone and check the date. You went out clubbing on a Saturday; it's now Sunday night. You try to sit up. A hand on your shoulder steadies you. It's Paul.
"Hey Frances." His voice is calm. "I need to ask you some questions. Can we talk for a bit?"
1) "I think you should be answering my questions."
2) "We can talk."
Our intelligence is our strength. It doesn't take much to realize he probably knows what's going on better than we do.
3) "Yeah, I've got some questions I'd like to ask too..."
I'd rather have a conversation rather then an interrogation
PSN: Boozer_777
This is open ended - there are no set choices.
PSN: Boozer_777
What's all this crazy talk about some Camarilla and Sabbat thing?
Paul makes a face. "Look, this is my fault - I'm really, really sorry that I got you into this. I should have kept mortals out of it, I was just lonely and -- Well, that's not answering your question." He clears his throat. "Uh, you're a vampire now. You're hungry because you can't eat food any more. You need blood. Don't worry! I'll teach you how to hunt."
"Your friends were also turned. The guy who turned you, your sire, he was one of the vampires who ran Warehouse 12. He was planning on giving your friends up as foot soldiers in the war we're fighting in exchange for entry into the Sabbat. This is my fault - I can't apologize enough. They knew that you worked here, at the Anvil. They thought that we knew they were about to betray the Anarchs, since we're affiliated with the Camarilla. They were going to hurt you and your friends. I couldn't allow that. I'm not good in a fist fight, and I'm a shitty shot, but a flamethrower? I can handle that."
"It's our society. It's the Masquerade. Most vampires want to live along side humans - we feed on them, some of us fuck them, we need them. But in order for that relationship to continue, we have to stay on the down low. We hide our fangs. We erase every trace of our existence. We follow human laws and avoid their attention. The Anarchs, well, they agree with us on that, but they don't like the way we run things. They're big on democracy and freedom and all that. They're fine - I don't mind the Anarchs. You can trust them. The Sabbat are the real bad apples. They think that we should rule over humans, conquer them. They think they're an army." Paul sighs heavily. "They're trying to get their claws into Toronto. We may have to fight a war. I am so, so sorry I brought you into this world, Frances. But we can't change my mistakes, so I want to help you survive."
Why the hell was I sent there?
PSN: Boozer_777
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
Paul shakes his head. "I know it's difficult to take in. It was even harder for me." He gestures at his face. "I'm a Nos - a Nosferatu. We're cursed with hideous faces. Your sire wasn't. So, you've got that over me." He grins, showing toothy fangs. You remember that the barman had fangs too and immediately pop a finger into your mouth.
Sure enough, your canines have grown and are so sharp that you almost break the skin on your finger. You pull your finger back out.
"Yeah, that's part of the deal." Paul says. "It's so you can feed, you have to break the skin. But you can see yourself in a mirror, you show up on cameras, and you don't need an invitation to get into a house. You are flammable, though. Very, very flammable."
You open your mouth and all that comes out is "aaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"
Paul takes you by the shoulders and looks you in the eye. "I know this is scary. But you're not alone. I'm with you. I'll help you. Okay? You're going to be fine."
"Yes. We're trying to introduce you to the bad news one on one. It's... a little chaotic otherwise."
"We didn't know that they were Sabbat. We thought it was an Anarch club. We were expecting you to come back, a little hungover but none the worse for wear, and tell us about their club. We didn't know it was dangerous. Again, I'm sorry. I thought working with mortals would be safer - that the other vamps in the city would respect the Masquerade. I didn't expect the Sabbat. None of us did. This is an act of war on their part."
"Tonight, we need to talk to the Prince. We're all going to go together - Elaine will hold down the fort, but I'm bringing you and your friends to the Prince. He's the head honcho - the guy who runs the show. But first, I need to ask you some questions about last night. Is that okay?"
1) "Yes."
2) "Can we see the Prince first?"
3) "No."
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
Yes
PSN: Boozer_777
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
You puzzle over it a while. So much of the other night is a blur... "No, I was drinking and talking to someone else, another man. He was..."
1) He was passionate - the sort of man who can handle himself in a fight.
2) He was a loner - the sort of man who would be comfortable in the wilderness.
3) He was cultured - an aficionado of art and culture. He was charming, but manipulative.
4) He was intelligent - it seemed as though he had hidden knowledge at his finger tips.
5) He was ambitious - he clearly wanted to become powerful through politics.
From the Desk of Darth Vertroue Diplomat to the USA.
PSN: Boozer_777
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
OH CRUEL WORLD
OH UNFAIRITY
Look at all the nerds, voting for being a nerd.
True, but we did also make our char intelligent, so we're playing to our strengths.
PSN: Boozer_777