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TV Edits: Movie Lines That Got Better

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Posts

  • BasticleBasticle Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The Cheese wrote: »
    Critical wrote: »
    SA wrote: »
    mastman wrote: »
    Die Hard 2 is incredible edited. I only wish I could find some examples

    Ah, yes. The "I HATE PEOPLE" sign.

    Actually, that was in Die Hard With A Vengeance

    Die Hard 2 had such gems such as "Get off your fat feet." instead of "fat ass."

    The I HATE PEOPLE sign was the original. They didn't want to put that word on a sign and send Willis out into the world with it, so the TV version is the unedited one.

    uh they filmed both on the same day so they could use the people one on later tv broadcasts

    Basticle on
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  • The CheeseThe Cheese Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
  • BasticleBasticle Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    no kidding

    Basticle on
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  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The Cheese wrote: »
    Oh, also, apparently for Swordfish they drew a bikini over Halle Berry's tits.

    Is there any reason, other than Halle Barry's tits, to watch Swordfish?

    CrossBuster on
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  • OrikaeshigitaeOrikaeshigitae Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2007
    The Cheese wrote: »
    Oh, also, apparently for Swordfish they drew a bikini over Halle Berry's tits.

    Is there any reason, other than Halle Barry's tits, to watch Swordfish?

    not really

    but they were very nice

    Orikaeshigitae on
  • Bloods EndBloods End Blade of Tyshalle Punch dimensionRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    dumb and dumber.

    " i cross bred a bulldog and a shitzu. i call it a bullSHOUT"

    the overdub for the last part is really loud compared to the rest of his statement.

    Bloods End on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I'm glad that they show unedited versions of movies on Virgin Atlantic, but at the same time I'm not.

    Like, if there's a lot of nudity, and there happen to be old people sitting next to you.

    But they've had MORE sex than you. If anything, it should be awkward for them, seeing all this sexual stuff while seated next to some kid.

    Defender on
  • EvilBadmanEvilBadman DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Crank, with Jason Statham as the guy who dies when he runs out of adrenaline, has an entire edited for television audio track on the dvd.

    EvilBadman on
    FyreWulff wrote: »
    I should note that Badman is fucking awesome
    XBL- Evil Badman; Steam- EvilBadman; Twitter - EvilBadman
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Defender wrote: »
    I'm glad that they show unedited versions of movies on Virgin Atlantic, but at the same time I'm not.

    Like, if there's a lot of nudity, and there happen to be old people sitting next to you.

    But they've had MORE sex than you. If anything, it should be awkward for them, seeing all this sexual stuff while seated next to some kid.

    I never looked at it that way.

    CrossBuster on
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  • KG3000KG3000 Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Everything was fine until the protection grid was shut off by Wally Wick here.

    Just can't remember what they changed Bill Murray's line to after that.

    KG3000 on
    What?
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited September 2007
    necroSYS wrote: »
    SA wrote: »
    Hands down best censored line ever?

    "Yippie Kai Yay, Melonfarmer!"

    I'm pretty sure it's "Mister Falcon."

    Oh man, this was so worth tracking down.
    http://www.badtvedits.com/clips/DH2%20Clean%20-%20Yippie.mov

    It's such a "comic book villian bad guy" kind of voice.

    This ain't bad either: http://www.badtvedits.com/clips/DH2%20Clean%20-%20Metal%20Detectors.mov

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • Blueknight78cBlueknight78c Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The Cheese wrote: »
    Oh, also, apparently for Swordfish they drew a bikini over Halle Berry's tits.

    Actually, that's an alternate version of that scene, apparently shot for TV. If you watch it closely, you can see/hear minor differences in the way Halle acts/says her lines.

    Also, I know a couple of DH2 TV edits were posted just above, but here is a collection of them.

    Blueknight78c on
    &%$#!
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    KG3000 wrote: »
    Everything was fine until the protection grid was shut off by Wally Wick here.

    "It's true your honor. The man is some kind of rodent."

    I am pretty sure that was an alternate take they used and not just a dubbed line.

    DarkPrimus on
  • Volucrisus AedriusVolucrisus Aedrius Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I can't remember what movie but at one point the one of the characters says that if this other dude is a cop he'll "suck your dick" but in TV he says "sing and dance."

    So then later on they find out that the dude is a cop and he's like "HEY I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA SING AND DANCE" so the guy gets on his knees in front of him

    Or something like this

    Goddamn this was a long ass time ago

    Volucrisus Aedrius on
  • FramlingFramling FaceHead Geebs has bad ideas.Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    They showed The Big Lebowski "uncensored" really late once on Comedy Central. Which meant all the swearing was still there, but the boobs were blurred out.

    Framling on
    you're = you are
    your = belonging to you

    their = belonging to them
    there = not here
    they're = they are
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I was watching Mallrats and Jason Lee's character called somebody a "silly blockhead." I don't remember what they were replacing.

    CrossBuster on
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  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    All it took was a fast karate punch

    Abracadaniel on
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Cameron is so tight that if you put a lump of coal in his FIST, in two weeks you'd have a diamond.

    Moriveth on
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited September 2007
    The last two lines of the for-TV Office Space are just:

    "A!"

    "A."

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Halle Berry's tits were a disappointment and nowhere near worth watching Swordfish for. If you're going to watch it, just watch the parts where innocent people get blown up because they're wearing C-4 vests loaded with ball bearings, turning them into human claymore mines.

    TankHammer on
  • jwalkjwalk Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Goatmon wrote: »
    Big Lebowski

    "This is what you get when you find a stranger in the alps!"

    oh my god, lol
    it's "do you see what happens Larry? this is what happens Larry, this is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!"

    Somewhere in Jackie Brown Samuel, L. Jackson's character says something like "I intend to GET my mutual fund money!" I always loved that one.

    jwalk on
  • Curly_BraceCurly_Brace Robot Girl Mimiga VillageRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Wait, no one has mentioned the TV-edit version of "Private Parts" (the Howard Stern Movie)? I didn't even mention it in my previous post?

    Man, that stuff is gold! The movie literally pauses as Howard Stern walks onto the screen, and explains the bullshit editing about to happen at least twice in the movie... honestly I find it funnier and more poignant than the original. (So not exactly line editing, but yeah...)

    Curly_Brace on
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yeah I mentioned Private Parts a couple pages back.

    If they have the TV cut on the DVD, I might actually be willing to spend money on it.

    DarkPrimus on
  • Curly_BraceCurly_Brace Robot Girl Mimiga VillageRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Yeah I mentioned Private Parts a couple pages back.

    If they have the TV cut on the DVD, I might actually be willing to spend money on it.

    Well uhhh carry on then.

    Curly_Brace on
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Yeah I mentioned Private Parts a couple pages back.

    If they have the TV cut on the DVD, I might actually be willing to spend money on it.

    Well uhhh carry on then.

    Dude you totally missed a chance for a high five.

    DarkPrimus on
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    The last two lines of the for-TV Office Space are just:

    "A!"

    "A."

    I like how in Office Space they just bleeped the profanities out, and blurred out the scene of brief nudity, rather than trying to replace it with something else.

    I feel that, overall, it did much less violence to the movie.

    CrossBuster on
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  • PharezonPharezon Struggle is an illusion. Victory is in the Qun.Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Suck you on Blade Trinity

    Pharezon on
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  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Nobody's mentioned The Usual Suspects?

    "Give me the keys, you fairy godmother!"

    ...five times. It's great.

    Six on
    can you feel the struggle within?
  • The DoctorThe Doctor Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Die Hard 3, Samuel L. Jackson.
    "You melon farmer."

    The Doctor on
  • ReznikReznik Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Dumb and Dumber:

    "Kiss my SANDWICH!"

    Reznik on
    Do... Re.... Mi... Ti... La...
    Do... Re... Mi... So... Fa.... Do... Re.... Do...
    Forget it...
  • Homestar GunnerHomestar Gunner Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I was watching Mallrats and Jason Lee's character called somebody a "silly blockhead." I don't remember what they were replacing.

    http://viewaskew.com/tv/abcrats/

    Homestar Gunner on
  • space_satanspace_satan __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    samuel Jackson in pulp fiction: "Tell that chick to be cool! tell that chick to be cool! say be cool chick!"

    awesome.

    space_satan on
  • Jazz SamuraiJazz Samurai Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Half of you people aren't even reading the thread.

    SOMEONE ELSE POST STRANGER IN THE ALPS LOLOL

    Jazz Samurai on
    yup
  • TheySlashThemTheySlashThem Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    okay then

    stranger in the alps
    I've never seen Big Lebowski, censored or otherwise

    TheySlashThem on
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ENCOUNTER AN UNKNOWN PERSON IN THE EUROPEAN ALPINE RANGE

    CrossBuster on
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  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    this is what happens when you farm a melon with a stranger named mr. falcon in the alps

    I hate people

    Kuribo's Shoe on
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