Help with gurls

Plat0nicPlat0nic Registered User regular
Since the forum says Help/Advice I was wondering if anyone could help me with this girl I know. Her name is cindy, she's in my class. She's really pretty but I don't wnat to make a fool of myself if I ask her out. Any ladies men out there that know a good way to get a girl to go out with you?

Posts

  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    "Hey Cindy, do you want to go out sometime?"

    Follow that exactly.

    You'll either get a yes, in which case booyah!
    Or a no, in which case, oh well. There are literally billions of other women out there.
    Or maybe she'll be mean to you, in which case turns out she wasn't as great as you though she was.

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  • _J__J_ Pedant Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    If you are uncomfortable approaching her out of nowhere to ask her out, you could start a conversation about

    1) Something she says in class.
    2) A homework assignment / discussion topic.
    3) A cool t-shirt she wears.
    4) Basically anything.

    Women are people. They can be approached and talked to as one might talk to a people.

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  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    "Hey Cindy, do you want to go out sometime?"

    Follow that exactly.

    You'll either get a yes, in which case booyah!
    Or a no, in which case, oh well. There are literally billions of other women out there.
    Or maybe she'll be mean to you, in which case turns out she wasn't as great as you though she was.

    This.

    Your approach is unlikely to change things that much. You're not loosing your chance forever, you're finding out if you have any chance at all.

    Not exactly on topic but the irony of the first thread of the guy named Platonic being about asking a girl out is just beautiful.

  • fightinfilipinofightinfilipino Angry as Hell CharlottesvilleRegistered User regular
    Plat0nic wrote: »
    ladies men

    drop this notion out of your head. be yourself.

    honestly, being yourself and being comfortable in your own skin is plenty attractive to other people. "pick up artists" are not what you should be even remotely striving for.

    you may also want to begin instead by just introducing yourself and talking with this person to find out what their interests are, what they like to do. maybe there's an activity that the both of you enjoy. BAM! instant date idea!

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  • schussschuss Registered User regular
    Confidence is the ultimate sexy thing to women (at least from what I've noticed). You want to date her right? So when you ask her out, you look her in the eye and say "Can I buy you dinner on X day?"
    Not "Oh hey, so you wanna maybe grab something sometime"
    You want it, go and get it. If she says no, no big deal, just move on.

    Cambiatanaporeon
  • FantasmaFantasma Registered User regular
    If you know her and you have struck a conversation before, talk to her to break the ice first, do not go directly to ask her out. Do you know if she has a boyfriend?, this is one the first questions you need to ask yourself, and then to her.

    You need to let her know you, so that she is not nervous when you come close.

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  • GafotoGafoto Registered User regular
    _J_ wrote: »
    Women are people. They can be approached and talked to as one might talk to a people.

    This is shockingly true. They even understand our earth language and social norms. If one were to ask a woman out on a date she is unlikely to respond by shooting you in the leg. She'll either say yes or politely refuse.

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  • Giggles_FunsworthGiggles_Funsworth Hackerman Bay Area SprawlRegistered User regular
    Plat0nic wrote: »
    ladies men

    drop this notion out of your head. be yourself.

    honestly, being yourself and being comfortable in your own skin is plenty attractive to other people. "pick up artists" are not what you should be even remotely striving for.

    you may also want to begin instead by just introducing yourself and talking with this person to find out what their interests are, what they like to do. maybe there's an activity that the both of you enjoy. BAM! instant date idea!

    While PUA are skeevy dudes that tend to use Intro to Psych tricks to prey on women with low self esteem, I've found that being attentive with my eyes and ears before initiating conversation gives me a lot more conversational threads to pull on before I actually know someone.

    The peacocking bullshit has a grain of truth to it too. Wearing an article of clothing that makes you stand out and says something about you, that a lady can compliment or comment on, that you would actually wear when you aren't trying to pickup women can be a fantastic icebreaker.

    A ladies man is just a sociable dude that doesn't lose his shit because someone has a vagina. Talking to women in a class is easy mode though guy, you've already got a plethora of common interests and conversational topics at your disposal just on the merits of attending a class together. Just talk to her.

    Essee
  • ANTVGM64ANTVGM64 Registered User regular
    schuss wrote: »
    Confidence is the ultimate sexy thing to women (at least from what I've noticed). You want to date her right? So when you ask her out, you look her in the eye and say "Can I buy you dinner on X day?"
    Not "Oh hey, so you wanna maybe grab something sometime"

    You want it, go and get it. If she says no, no big deal, just move on.

    This is wonderful advice you should absolutely take. Of course social anxiety can make it tricky, but you gotta knuckle up is all!

  • Giggles_FunsworthGiggles_Funsworth Hackerman Bay Area SprawlRegistered User regular
    ANTVGM64 wrote: »
    schuss wrote: »
    Confidence is the ultimate sexy thing to women (at least from what I've noticed). You want to date her right? So when you ask her out, you look her in the eye and say "Can I buy you dinner on X day?"
    Not "Oh hey, so you wanna maybe grab something sometime"

    You want it, go and get it. If she says no, no big deal, just move on.

    This is wonderful advice you should absolutely take. Of course social anxiety can make it tricky, but you gotta knuckle up is all!

    There is no way he is going to have the confidence to deliver that intro and not come off like a weirdo if he is making H/A threads about how to talk to "gurls".

    Just start with talking to her about something related to class dude.

  • Plat0nicPlat0nic Registered User regular
    I think I'm just gonna man up and go for it. You guys made me feel more confident. RAWRRRR Beastmode !!!!!!!

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