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Zdeno [Chat]ra

12467100

Posts

  • MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    I like the new co-optional podcast's opening.

    http://youtu.be/oVSqhTCASHw

    Also the first like 5 minutes are them talking about eating cold French Fries and how horrible it is.

    Also has Jim Sterling who is always entertaining.

    u7stthr17eud.png
  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    'i really liked when your dick rubbed against my hip for 3 minutes the other night. do you like burritos? i know a place'

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    Oh, am I too pale for you now?

    COLORIST.

    *weeps tears of winter-shut-in-skin oppression*

  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator mod
    The Spy Who Loved Me is on TV. I am reminded of how awesome a guy skiing off a mountain is. And how much the blurry naked women of Maurice Binder's Bond titles played in my early appreciation of the female form.

  • redxredx I(x)=2(x)+1 whole numbersRegistered User regular
    Mim wrote: »
    redx wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    msmya wrote: »
    I mean, I danced like crazy with this other girl there too , it was fun , we danced together so we wouldn't have to have creepy guys all up in out space.

    that might be why you were dancing with her

    bow chicka bow wow

    in other news, going to a drag queen show, is that like...wrong or can it be fun?

    I just want to be around them and absorb their cattiness.

    It's fun, if you can get past the sort of nascent objectification of female stereotype and less than totally helpful impact on for trans-relations.

    if you get wicked drunk, you probably won't mind the appropriation by privileged cis-males.

    I didn't want to show up and someone go "WE DON'T WANT YOUR HETERONORMATIVE CIS-GENDERED BUTT HERE. GET OUT. WE ARE NOT YOUR AMUSEMENT"

    I just want to absorb their wit and if any of them are into ladies, then maybe even date them in the future <3

    It's ok. They'll just assume you're a... uhh... female that likes hanging around gay men.

    They moistly come out at night, moistly.
  • msmyamsmya Being Fabulous Registered User regular
    Winky ; but tht makes me sound super boring haha

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    msmya wrote: »
    But really. What do I message okcupid guy and last night at bar guy???

    grinder: "I felt your dick. Liked what I felt. Let's talk more."

    okcupid guy: "nothing. would you like to come feed me strawberries?"

    I'm sorry. I'm ovulating. Ignore my hot and bothered ways~

  • MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    msmya wrote: »
    Winky ; but tht makes me sound super boring haha

    It is the truth.

    Add in that you are open for hanging out.

    u7stthr17eud.png
  • WinkyWinky rRegistered User regular
    msmya wrote: »
    Winky ; but tht makes me sound super boring haha

    No it doesn't, it makes you sound spontaneous, like you are a girl who doesn't need plans to have fun. Fuck the calendarchy.

  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator mod
    I kind of want Roger Moore to dispense with the double entendres just once. Q asks whether the mission was successful and instead of a smirking 'on and off' he just says TOTALLY BANGED THIS WOMAN LIKE TWICE, DUDE.

  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    alright buffalo bill

    What? No I'm just saying lighter chicks make themselves turn orange trying to get that skin tone and she rocks it well.

    Not I want to steal her eggs, kill her, wear her skin and fuck sarksus so I can steal his sperm then kill him and raise their test tube babby to my own nefarious purposes.

    Silly.

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    redx wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    redx wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    msmya wrote: »
    I mean, I danced like crazy with this other girl there too , it was fun , we danced together so we wouldn't have to have creepy guys all up in out space.

    that might be why you were dancing with her

    bow chicka bow wow

    in other news, going to a drag queen show, is that like...wrong or can it be fun?

    I just want to be around them and absorb their cattiness.

    It's fun, if you can get past the sort of nascent objectification of female stereotype and less than totally helpful impact on for trans-relations.

    if you get wicked drunk, you probably won't mind the appropriation by privileged cis-males.

    I didn't want to show up and someone go "WE DON'T WANT YOUR HETERONORMATIVE CIS-GENDERED BUTT HERE. GET OUT. WE ARE NOT YOUR AMUSEMENT"

    I just want to absorb their wit and if any of them are into ladies, then maybe even date them in the future <3

    It's ok. They'll just assume you're a... uhh... female that likes hanging around gay men.

    I know what term you were gonna use! I'M TOTALLY IN THIS THING.

    If there are any butch lesbians around, the next time you see me, I might be in a body cast because I fell off my bar stool craning my neck too hard and shattered every bone in my body.

  • JacobkoshJacobkosh Gamble a stamp. I can show you how to be a real man!Moderator mod
    msmya wrote: »
    That guy that I danced with last night texted me , lol

    But clearly I'm more interested in this okcupid guy ; should I just straight up ask him to hang out today or is that too soon?

    @msmya‌

    "too soon" is for Holocaust jokes and ejaculation

    rRwz9.gif
  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    msmya wrote: »
    But really. What do I message okcupid guy and last night at bar guy???

    Oh hey dude wanna get some late lunch, maybe watch the muppet movie?

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    I hope the Muppet film ends with a graphic Team America style sex scene with miss piggy and Jason Segal

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Jacobkosh wrote: »
    msmya wrote: »
    That guy that I danced with last night texted me , lol

    But clearly I'm more interested in this okcupid guy ; should I just straight up ask him to hang out today or is that too soon?

    msmya‌

    "too soon" is for Holocaust jokes and ejaculation

    bitch i thought we was racing

    i won, by the by

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

    holla at me when you sit on your balls

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Kagera wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    alright buffalo bill

    What? No I'm just saying lighter chicks make themselves turn orange trying to get that skin tone and she rocks it well.

    Not I want to steal her eggs, kill her, wear her skin and fuck sarksus so I can steal his sperm then kill him and raise their test tube babby to my own nefarious purposes.

    Silly.

    I thought that was mostly white chicks who turned orange.

    us brown chicks tend to brown quite nicely like a delicious golden turkey.

  • WinkyWinky rRegistered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

    holla at me when you sit on your balls

    Chairs obviously designed by women.

  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    Mim wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    Oh, am I too pale for you now?

    COLORIST.

    *weeps tears of winter-shut-in-skin oppression*

    Well

    I didn't want to sound racist buuuuttt...
    I am so terrible.

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

    holla at me when you sit on your balls

    holla at me when you spew blood out of your orifice and when you stand your lips feel heavy and hurt.

    and I don't mean the ones on your face.

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited March 2014
    i wish i had mim-esque color

    then i could wear, say... lilac... without feeling like a fucking douche.

    curse this cave-grub paleness. nurses all giving me iv's on the first try, looking at the atlas-of-america network of blue veins visible on my inner arm

    like something freshly emerged from its old skin, translucent and shimmering

    like something you'd find in the mariana trench, 30,000 feet down

    Organichu on
  • BogartBogart Streetwise Hercules Registered User, Moderator mod
    Stormberg is an ace villain. Webbed hands, underwater lair, seven foot tall iron toothed henchman, feeds disloyal minions to sharks while listening to Bach. Awesome.

    Also, Caroline Munro. Wa hey.

  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    Mim wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    alright buffalo bill

    What? No I'm just saying lighter chicks make themselves turn orange trying to get that skin tone and she rocks it well.

    Not I want to steal her eggs, kill her, wear her skin and fuck sarksus so I can steal his sperm then kill him and raise their test tube babby to my own nefarious purposes.

    Silly.

    I thought that was mostly white chicks who turned orange.

    us brown chicks tend to brown quite nicely like a delicious golden turkey.

    Well I did mean white chicks mostly but I'm sure I've seen some Asian women who loved jersey shore for some reason and got orange tans.
    don't make an orange chicken joke don't make an orange chicken joke.

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • EddyEddy Gengar the Bittersweet Registered User regular
    are

    are we all ovulating at the same time

    *sync buddies*

    "and the morning stars I have seen
    and the gengars who are guiding me" -- W.S. Merwin
  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

    holla at me when you sit on your balls

    holla at me when you spew blood out of your orifice and when you stand your lips feel heavy and hurt.

    and I don't mean the ones on your face.

    holla holla holla holla holla holla

    5248dccd45e18c4fcbbb6a24ab705ab5.jpg

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    alright buffalo bill

    What? No I'm just saying lighter chicks make themselves turn orange trying to get that skin tone and she rocks it well.

    Not I want to steal her eggs, kill her, wear her skin and fuck sarksus so I can steal his sperm then kill him and raise their test tube babby to my own nefarious purposes.

    Silly.

    I thought that was mostly white chicks who turned orange.

    us brown chicks tend to brown quite nicely like a delicious golden turkey.

    Well I did mean white chicks mostly but I'm sure I've seen some Asian women who loved jersey shore for some reason and got orange tans.
    don't make an orange chicken joke don't make an orange chicken joke.

    Yeah, Asian girls turn pretty orange too.

    I guess being black and puerto rican is an advantage this time around.

  • MimMim I prefer my lovers… dead.Registered User regular
    Organichu wrote: »
    i wish i had mim-esque color

    then i could wear, say... lilac... without feeling like a fucking douche.

    curse this cave-grub paleness. nurses all giving me iv's on the first try, looking at the atlas-of-america network of blue veins visible on my inner arm

    like something freshly emerged from its old skin, translucent and shimmering

    like something you'd find in the mariana trench, 30,000 feet down

    what, the color I am now or the color I am in that picture

    I mean, either one is pretty flawless

  • TL DRTL DR Not at all confident in his reflexive opinions of thingsRegistered User regular
    puerh and a sandwich involving a friend's homemade bluberry mango jam

    yusss

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    edited March 2014
    either one is fine. just something where when i wore anything but white i wouldn't look like a not-at-all-energy-efficient lightbulb

    Organichu on
  • KageraKagera Imitating the worst people. Since 2004Registered User regular
    Mim wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Kagera wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    naw but this jawn tho

    The guy who hit on my mom actually said "I can break that jawn up for you" (in regards to some ice we were trying to break)

    it was my first time seeing someone actually use that word seriously.

    haha really? goddamn you really haven't spent enough time in philly (or spent too long northwest of the boulevard)

    that word was probably the most common pronoun of my childhood

    I don't go outside that much so I'm pretty pale (for my skin tone) and I don't hear a lot of people talking.

    I can get this dark:

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    so imagine what I could pick up if I went outside.

    I like your skin tone in this picture.

    alright buffalo bill

    What? No I'm just saying lighter chicks make themselves turn orange trying to get that skin tone and she rocks it well.

    Not I want to steal her eggs, kill her, wear her skin and fuck sarksus so I can steal his sperm then kill him and raise their test tube babby to my own nefarious purposes.

    Silly.

    I thought that was mostly white chicks who turned orange.

    us brown chicks tend to brown quite nicely like a delicious golden turkey.

    Well I did mean white chicks mostly but I'm sure I've seen some Asian women who loved jersey shore for some reason and got orange tans.
    don't make an orange chicken joke don't make an orange chicken joke.

    Yeah, Asian girls turn pretty orange too.

    I guess being black and puerto rican is an advantage this time around.

    Dat black privilege doe...

    My neck, my back, my FUPA and my crack.
  • JacobkoshJacobkosh Gamble a stamp. I can show you how to be a real man!Moderator mod
    edited March 2014
    Bogart wrote: »
    I kind of want Roger Moore to dispense with the double entendres just once. Q asks whether the mission was successful and instead of a smirking 'on and off' he just says TOTALLY BANGED THIS WOMAN LIKE TWICE, DUDE.


    I feel like as Mooore ages he comes off more and more like a sleazy old man that his colleagues kind of stoically endure.

    I really wish that someone sometimes would be like "yes oh my god we get it"

    Jacobkosh on
    rRwz9.gif
  • WinkyWinky rRegistered User regular
    TL DR wrote: »
    puerh and a sandwich involving a friend's homemade bluberry mango jam

    yusss

    I am jelly

  • OrganichuOrganichu poops peesRegistered User, Moderator mod
    tldr i had to defend yerba mate to someone a couple weeks ago

    they'd never heard of it

    i was explaining what it was to this spanish girl in a bodega!

    i felt like a star

  • redxredx I(x)=2(x)+1 whole numbersRegistered User regular
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    Mim wrote: »
    Organichu wrote: »
    i too am ovulating. i'm a hot mess. *fans self, eats a whole cantaloupe, dips tender nipples in ice bath*

    YOU DON'T KNOW TINDER.

    I AM IN PAIN, BRO.

    THE WIND CAN'T EVEN BLOW PAST THEM WITHOUT ME GOING "OW"

    holla at me when you sit on your balls

    holla at me when you spew blood out of your orifice and when you stand your lips feel heavy and hurt.

    and I don't mean the ones on your face.

    Yeah, sounds almost a moderate case of hemorrhoids, except less embarrassing cause 51% of the population have it on a regular basis for most of their life.

    They moistly come out at night, moistly.
  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    I don't think blueberry and mango should be combined in jam. Strong jam opinions are what got man on the moon

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
  • DeebaserDeebaser on my way to work in a suit and a tie Ahhhh...come on fucking guyRegistered User regular
    Mim wrote: »

    ScSvgOB.jpg

    I like to imagine that the old dude is pushing beardy away in an attempted geriatric cockblock

  • MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    Someone mention orange Asian girls?

    Ganguro_crop.jpg

    u7stthr17eud.png
This discussion has been closed.