If I have any money on me while walking around, I pretty much will always give at least the change in my pocket or a dollar to any panhandler (this policy with coins once backfired on me while visiting London, when I absentmindedly handed over what had to be the equivalent of like $12 to some guy). My friends always give me shit for it, but it's like I'm physically incapable of not giving something, if I have it.
On the other hand, I was buying beer at my local corner store one time, when a guy walked in and starting hawking toasters and other small appliances out of a Macy's shopping bag. When I told him I didn't want to buy his toaster, he grew angry, called me a "jive turkey" and then said "There's no love in this world anymore."
edit: I have to tell you. Life is never the same once someone calls you a jive turkey in anger.
Ladai on
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I Win Swordfightsall the traits of greatnessstarlight at my feetRegistered Userregular
I went to San Francisco with my grandma when I was 9 and when she gave money to a homeless guy she told me "I give because you never know when it might be you who needs some help." And also because she's grateful that she has a roof over her head to go back to.
That has stuck with me my whole life, and my dad gives to the people he finds genuine and I've done the same all my life.
In fucking Vancouver it's the worst because so many of them have dogs and I'm so weak to homeless animals.
I was approached by a man currently eating an orange Flintstone pushpop and holding a whole box of them in his other hand
He asked me if I had some spare change
I bought one of his pushpops
is this code for a handjob, because you don't need to be ashamed sometimes you just need a little release
i never understood the appeal of paying for a handjob
like, i have my own hands right here! that know what feels good!
anyway i guess i occasionally give a couple bucks to someone who seems like they need it, if i happen to have change on me
and try not to get too annoyed when they tell me i should give them more
it definitely annoys me when decent street musicians are put into the same category though, give them a fiver at least, if you stop and listen to a song or two!
it's funny because from a third person perspective it's so obvious that you think only a moron would fall for it but in the moment it's actually really easy to just be like "oh yeah sure here's sixty bucks"
What? No way that video is for real. I could see someone saying like.. "hey nice watch can I look" or "can I see your phone" and then running. But asking for your phone your watch and you wallet all together? I mean, I feel like you'd have to be high to fall for that.
nope it works
obviously not everyone will fall for it but there's a few things he does to prime the guy into giving him his stuff
he asks him for directions, which gets the guy in a mood where he's being helpful (notice the way he emphasizes the phrase "you're happy to give that to me")
then he hands him his water bottle, which subconsciously makes the guy feel like he should give him something to reciprocate
combine that with the slight disorientation of being approached by a stranger on the street and being given clear explicit instructions and yeah certain people will just be like "here ya go" and not realize what they did until it's too late to get their stuff back
I can watch misdirection videos on youtube for hours
I think the real cincher in that one is how immediately after he gets the stuff he starts asking the guy to clarify directions and then leaves with a handshake
I can't imagine he thought derren brown was going to run off with the watch and keys and phone, just that he needed them for a second for some reason, but he isn't given any time to think about that before the conversation is already over
"thank you, you're fine, thank you"
-Tal on
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PiptheFairFrequently not in boats.Registered Userregular
it's funny because from a third person perspective it's so obvious that you think only a moron would fall for it but in the moment it's actually really easy to just be like "oh yeah sure here's sixty bucks"
What? No way that video is for real. I could see someone saying like.. "hey nice watch can I look" or "can I see your phone" and then running. But asking for your phone your watch and you wallet all together? I mean, I feel like you'd have to be high to fall for that.
nope it works
obviously not everyone will fall for it but there's a few things he does to prime the guy into giving him his stuff
he asks him for directions, which gets the guy in a mood where he's being helpful (notice the way he emphasizes the phrase "you're happy to give that to me")
then he hands him his water bottle, which subconsciously makes the guy feel like he should give him something to reciprocate
combine that with the slight disorientation of being approached by a stranger on the street and being given clear explicit instructions and yeah certain people will just be like "here ya go" and not realize what they did until it's too late to get their stuff back
I can watch misdirection videos on youtube for hours
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PiptheFairFrequently not in boats.Registered Userregular
Every time I hear that story, I wonder if Putin had someone specific in mind, or if he was just stating it as a fact that the ring was weighty enough to kill a person with in general.
Like, was he thinking specifically about that starving orphan he keeps chained up in the woodshed? Or was that just a coincidence?
Living in downtown Ottawa, I get the occasional clearly bullshit story about how someone needs money for a cab, or groceries, or what have you.
Now, I don't want to pre-judge everyone just because these stories are so common - so I offer to go shopping or share a cab with them! No takers yet.
But there was one time, the dude was so aggressive I was honestly worried for the safety of myself and my gf.
We were walking home late one night from a movie and a very tall dude just kind of walks up to us from a vacant parking lot. He then proceeds to tell us a story that has basically combined elements from about 4 other stories of this type. I'm very tired, and also a little on edge given the seclution of this area, so I appologize to the dude and say "Sorry man, no cash on either of us - have a good night and good luck."
"Well, there's an ATM over there!" He says and points "Let's go get some cash!" and he steps towards us. At this point I step in between him and my gf and say "No way man. I don't know you. We're going home."
He steps even closer (at this point he's maybe 12 inches away from me). "Come on! Where do you live? I'll come with you and you can get some money from there."
And this point my fight or flight kicked in and I started pushing my gf back from him and told him in no uncertain terms that it was time for him to leave - and I told my girlfriend to get home and then call the cops. I was fully expecting for this guy to jump me at this point but all I was really concerned about was making sure he didn't get to my gf.
Luckily this spooked the dude enough that he backed up and took off. It was pretty scary.
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
I've given car rides at night to hitchhikers and other strange folk who just happened to walk up to my car and knock on the window outside of a diner at 2 a.m.
I've let strangers who approach me on the street use my cell phone.
Outside of that one time I got robbed at gunpoint after letting someone use my phone, nothing bad ever came of any of it.
Or at least I used to be really trusting. To be honest, that one robbery kind of resulted in me involuntarily shying away from random people who approach me on the street. Although I'm working on getting back to where I used to be on that.
it's funny because from a third person perspective it's so obvious that you think only a moron would fall for it but in the moment it's actually really easy to just be like "oh yeah sure here's sixty bucks"
What? No way that video is for real. I could see someone saying like.. "hey nice watch can I look" or "can I see your phone" and then running. But asking for your phone your watch and you wallet all together? I mean, I feel like you'd have to be high to fall for that.
nope it works
obviously not everyone will fall for it but there's a few things he does to prime the guy into giving him his stuff
he asks him for directions, which gets the guy in a mood where he's being helpful (notice the way he emphasizes the phrase "you're happy to give that to me")
then he hands him his water bottle, which subconsciously makes the guy feel like he should give him something to reciprocate
combine that with the slight disorientation of being approached by a stranger on the street and being given clear explicit instructions and yeah certain people will just be like "here ya go" and not realize what they did until it's too late to get their stuff back
I can watch misdirection videos on youtube for hours
some of the homeless people around here pretend not to be homeless
they usually have props
gas can, ancient flip cell phone
I promise I am a roughly middle-class individual just like you experiencing what amounts to a high-level inconvenience and not someone who lacks reliable access to one or more of the basic human needs
please, I promise
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MalReynoldsThe Hunter S Thompson of incredibly mild medicinesRegistered Userregular
One time, as I was leaving for the day at my old job, this dude walks up to my car. He's got hospital tape on his arm (I worked on a hospital campus) and he approaches my driver's side door. I roll the window down, thinking he's going to ask for directions.
"Hey, can I get a ride home? My girlfriend is at work and I was taken here by ambulance."
I paused for a second. "What were you in for?"
"Celiac attack."
"Let me look at your paperwork."
(I was working with the hospital at the time and was checking to see if this was a forgery - it was on the level)
"Where do you live?"
He told me.
"Yeah, sure," I said, and he got in.
We're driving, making small talk - he paints water towers for a living, he feels very blessed to have his girlfriend - and I have to stop for gas in a rough part of town. He runs into the 7/11 to get cigarettes and water, and this dude walks up to me.
"Hey, you want some crack?"
I was taken aback; I don't think a: look like a crack addict and b: look like someone who would ever be interested in crack.
The hitchhikers busts out of the 7/11 and starts yelling at the guy, who eventually backs off and leaves.
The hitcher turns to me. "You almost got robbed. Soon as you got your wallet out, he was gonna take it. What was he tryin'a sell?"
"Crack."
The hitcher pauses. "The fuck?"
"Right?"
The hitcher borrows my phone and calls his girlfriend, letting her know what happens, and I drop him off at the CVS up the block from his house so he can get meds - I had a prior engagement and was now running late. He gave me some money for gas and then friended me on Facebook. I went out clubbing with him a few times, but we've since fallen out of contact and the last I heard, he had left the state; his girlfriend eventually left him and he became suicidal and wanted to stay with his family in Florida.
I wonder if he's okay?
"A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline."
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
Well, shit, I think I was on the other end of this two days ago.
TL;DR I got a giftcard for shoes and after some awkward stuff gave it to someone else.
I got this $25 gift card for shoes from Payless from a Christmas party my apartments had. I thought, how often do I buy shoes? Once, in maybe 4 years? So I get it in my head that I'm going to go to the mall (where there's a Payless) and make someone's holiday better by buying them some shoes. The only problem is that my name's on a sticker on the card so I would actually have to basically go shoe shopping with a total stranger for this to work.
It never occurred to me once that it sounded like a scam.
I walked up to a random person and said "It's the holidays, I'm in a giving mood, would you like some free shoes with this card here?" 8 people refused politely. Rejected, I went into a store and asked an employee what they would do with the card. They said they'd love to take me up on the offer, but they were at work so they couldn't.
After a couple more tries I went to the local grocery store to get some lunch. While there I went to the customer service desk and explained my story, asking if they knew anyone who would want free shoes. One of the girls behind the counter said in a joking manner "Heh, I'd take it."
I ripped the sticker with my name on it off the card and gave it to her. She couldn't believe it at first. I told her it was her's now since I meant to give it someone.
One summer, there was a pair of legit college kids probably doing some kind of social experiment outside of one of the subway stations in the city. They had signs that were too well written, and because it was summer, and it gets pretty humid in Toronto, the girl was in a two piece bathing suit, looking clean, highlights in her hair and wearing Ray-Ban sunglasses. The guy had bermuda shorts, bleached hair, a gym-toned bod and flipflops. They were "recently homeless".
Good luck with that.
PSN: TheArcadeBear
Steam: TheArcadeBear
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MalReynoldsThe Hunter S Thompson of incredibly mild medicinesRegistered Userregular
I actually inadvertently ran a scam back in high school.
My senior year, I played Dogberry in a production of 'Much Ado About Nothing' set in the antebellum south; I gave it my all and tried to make the comedy physical knowing that our audience wouldn't particularly understand the malapropisms, but the director reigned me in. The best joke I could muster was a sweat stain; in my first scene, it was barely visible around my neck, but with each progressive scene I was in, I would add more and more water back-stage until the front of the shirt was completely saturated. My entrances would get laughs. The audience tracked the stain. I went off book one time, the last night of the show, when an actor also broke what we had rehearsed and ended up throwing a plate of cookies at the actor playing Leanato. On my entrance, I walked in, delivered my line, picked up a cookie off the stage, and began to eat it.
That's neither here nor there - just me rambling.
For our shows, we would put a banner out in front of the theater with the lead casts headshots on them. We had a photographer come in to do these headshots - our theater department took itself very seriously, and we usually pulled more money in than the football team, so it paid off - and I decided to have my picture taken in character. Smug, glancing up over my glasses with my head tilted down, and a half grin.
A student saw the picture and said, "I would totally buy a shirt with that picture on it. But you'd have to put the word 'ACE' underneath."
So I did that. I went to cafepress.com and I did a mockup of the shirt. I showed a few students, and before I knew it, I was taking pre-orders. With the money given - and a generous $5 markup on my part - I bought the shirts and distributed them to around 20 people. They all wore them whenever, and eventually, more and more people started looking to buy the shirts.
I took a second round of pre-orders, this time, around 30 or so, but I ended up moving to New York a week ahead of schedule, so the shirts never came.
I've made amends to the people on the pre-order list, either reimbursing them - this was almost 10 years ago - or doing good deeds. Save for one girl; she pre-ordered an ACE shirt and never got it. When I moved back from New York with a glaring case of Overestimating My Abilities as a Writer and Disenfranchisement with the Boheim Lifestyle - she approached me in a Barnes and Noble.
"I'm so sorry," I said. "I can either get you the shirt now, or I can give you your money back."
"How about you take me out to dinner instead."
I did. It fizzled after about 10 minutes. As it turns out, when you're a nebbish, neurotic man, the intrigue built around the stories you left behind don't usually coalesce with the reality.
-
Two more stories relating to the ACE shirt.
A group of Freshman, my senior year, had... become sort of a fan club. They made up the majority of the first and only round of orders. And to celebrate my moving to New York, they coordinated an ACE Friday; what was to be a once a month event where they would wear the shirt to celebrate the fact that I had gone on to other things.
The first ACE Friday, I get a panicked call from my mother.
Apparently, the administration had thought this was some sort of memorial tribute and that I had killed myself shortly after leaving the state. Seeing a swarm of Sophomores roaming the halls, all wearing a shirt with my face plastered on it was apparently eerie and disconcerting, and the administration took it to mean that the worst had happened.
ACE Friday's never happened again.
-
I was telling this story to my roommate as we were driving to see Interstellar; my Dad was treating, and my brother was meeting us there.
"You're so full of shit," she said, as we were standing with my Dad, tickets in hand, waiting for my brother to show up.
"What's the shit he's full of?" he said, appearing phantomlike from behind a pillar.
"This whole ACE shirt thing."
My brother stared at me for a second, unbuttoned his overshirt, to reveal the ACE shirt serving as an undershirt.
It should also be noted that although he and my father did not coordinate, they both showed up wearing the same purple hued button up tucked into jeans.
-
I was also the mascot for a nationally ranking laser-tag team based on my Senior ID picture, but that's a story for another day.
"A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline."
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
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#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
Oh man, I know this is a little off topic, but I can kind of relate.
So, a little background. I work in the Contact Centre of a state owned financial administrator, so we handle the finances of a number of people with disabilities, people with substance abuse issues, the elderly. So basically, anyone who the State have decided cannot handle their own finances, and there are no friends or family members to assist, the control of their finances falls to us.
So, you can imagine the kind of stories we hear from people, in an attempt to get a little bit of extra cash. (Note: The money we hold is certainly their own, and we really try to give them money whenever they need it, but sometimes, we have to say no, for their own benefit).
There's this sweet old lady, and she calls all the time for extra money, but it's always for the same thing. Milk and Bread. That's it. I know for sure that she isn't using the money for that, but I have this mental image of her with multiple walls, filled with milk and bread, like some kind of holy shrine to the Gods of Yeast and Dairy.
And another one, where I only heard this second hand, so I can't verify the legitimacy of the story, but honestly having spoken with the person in question, this would not surprise me.
This gentleman came into the head office one day, holding a very young child, claiming it to be his, and in desperate need for funds to look after the child. Well, as you could imagine, the powers that be were rather intrigued, as this seemed to be the first time that anyone had been notified of him having a child, let alone helping to raise one. Well, after a bit of careful investigation, turns out, he had approached a lady, convinced her that if he could "borrow" the child, he would be able to get some money, for both him and herself, to which she agreed.
I really enjoy the stories that come out of my work sometimes.
BPKick on
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MalReynoldsThe Hunter S Thompson of incredibly mild medicinesRegistered Userregular
In the last five years, I've lost a fiance to suicide, I've been fired, the four years I spent on my self published book went to naught as it flopped hard; I've gotten a job after wracking up $7,000 in living expenses while trying to find a job - six months after signing a lease to an apartment to move out of my childhood home - adopted a kitten which bankrupted my savings when she required emergency surgery, and in the last month alone have had car expenses that have gotten into the... many more-dollars-than-I-have-range - and my workload has quadrupled in the last month due to restructuring at my company. And my best friend and roommate is at home in Chicago for Christmas. I was supposed to go with her but couldn't get the time off work or afford the flight.
But when you say something like that - and I mean this earnestly - makes me feel like a person instead of a failure.
"A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline."
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
Not to derail the thread, but Mal, you sound like you'd be a good friend. I mean, dealing with that level of shit is admirable, man. Okay, resume thread.
I hate when people ask me for money because I really want to help people who need it but the skeptic in me assumes everyone is a scam artist.
My mom is a lot of things but shes really good at identifying scams. Like one christmas there was this guy by the mall begging for money and had like a suitcae people were tossing bills in, she pointed out to me that the guy was wearing a nice jacket, the suitcase was leather, he had cufflinks on under the coat, and he obviously had recently had his hair/moustache cut, but like 60% of the people didn't pay attention and just tossed a couple of singles in the case.
Though when I'm at GenCon I always give money to the guys with the funny signs. Indianapolis seems to have a lot of homeless dudes. Like the last time I went one dude had a sign that read "Help, warrior out of healing potions and our cleric is dead. Need $$ to buy a resurrection scroll" and I was like "Yeah ok, $5 man. Thats pretty good.
The first time I ever went to Oregon, I pulled up to a gas station right off the interstate in the middle of nowhere and some sketchy looking guy walks up and knocks on my window and I'm thinking yep, about to get murdered.
It was the station attendant because you can't pump your own gas in Oregon.
The first time I ever went to Oregon, I pulled up to a gas station right off the interstate in the middle of nowhere and some sketchy looking guy walks up and knocks on my window and I'm thinking yep, about to get murdered.
It was the station attendant because you can't pump your own gas in Oregon.
Wait what. Is this a real thing?
Yeah, it's real there and I think in another state or two. It blew my mind when I worked at a gas station and had people ask me to show them how to pump their own gas, as they had never done it before in their lives.
I think the last time I saw a guy legit scamming or at least being weird was at PAX East 2011, there was a guy selling...like toothbrushes or something I think on the sidewalk. @javen or @Goose do you guys remember?
knitdanIn ur baseKillin ur guysRegistered Userregular
There were a few times in my life I fell for the "family stranded, need money for car repair/gas/whatever" scam.
Then last year I wasn't even out of my car yet before this lady came up and started with her bullshit story, and I had to threaten calling the cops before she'd go away.
“I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
One time, as I was leaving for the day at my old job, this dude walks up to my car. He's got hospital tape on his arm (I worked on a hospital campus) and he approaches my driver's side door. I roll the window down, thinking he's going to ask for directions.
"Hey, can I get a ride home? My girlfriend is at work and I was taken here by ambulance."
I paused for a second. "What were you in for?"
"Celiac attack."
"Let me look at your paperwork."
(I was working with the hospital at the time and was checking to see if this was a forgery - it was on the level)
"Where do you live?"
He told me.
"Yeah, sure," I said, and he got in.
We're driving, making small talk - he paints water towers for a living, he feels very blessed to have his girlfriend - and I have to stop for gas in a rough part of town. He runs into the 7/11 to get cigarettes and water, and this dude walks up to me.
"Hey, you want some crack?"
I was taken aback; I don't think a: look like a crack addict and b: look like someone who would ever be interested in crack.
The hitchhikers busts out of the 7/11 and starts yelling at the guy, who eventually backs off and leaves.
The hitcher turns to me. "You almost got robbed. Soon as you got your wallet out, he was gonna take it. What was he tryin'a sell?"
"Crack."
The hitcher pauses. "The fuck?"
"Right?"
The hitcher borrows my phone and calls his girlfriend, letting her know what happens, and I drop him off at the CVS up the block from his house so he can get meds - I had a prior engagement and was now running late. He gave me some money for gas and then friended me on Facebook. I went out clubbing with him a few times, but we've since fallen out of contact and the last I heard, he had left the state; his girlfriend eventually left him and he became suicidal and wanted to stay with his family in Florida.
I wonder if he's okay?
These are my favorite kinds of stories (Well not the end) about meeting people. Like when I was younger, before facebook, we would go camping a lot and you'd meet the other kids whos parents spent a lot of time camping at state parks and you'd like, for a bond that lasted for a weekend, these are you president's day friends, and these are your fourth of july friends. And of course there was the core group, but I've found you don't have that as an adult.
Like I worked at a movie theater for years, I was a manager and one very cold and snowy night I was headed to my car at the end of the night, like 2 am and theres this young dude in his car with a lady. He comes out and approaches me, hes like maybe 19 or 20 and I could tell he was at least trying to look like he was some sort of badass by the way he walked and dressed and talked but basically seemed ok. His car died, I tried to jump it, no go, so he needed to get towed but the tow truck said it would be an hour or two until they arrived, so we needed to say near. The only thing I could do was unlock the theater and let them in, so I did. Of course I had to stay, and honestly I feel asleep on a bench. The guy and his (I then learned) pregnant girlfriend sat on another bench warming up, I grabbed them an blanket (ok look I took naps in the projection booth) warmed them up some pretsels, got them soda/water and we just hung out for awhile while we waited for the tow truck. I never told my boss, she'd of been pissed I opened myself and the theater up to so much liability, but every time after that the guy came in the see a movie hed ask for me and hed always shake my hand and thank me and we'd chat a bit. It feels good, ya know?
The first time I ever went to Oregon, I pulled up to a gas station right off the interstate in the middle of nowhere and some sketchy looking guy walks up and knocks on my window and I'm thinking yep, about to get murdered.
It was the station attendant because you can't pump your own gas in Oregon.
Wait what. Is this a real thing?
Yeah, it's real there and I think in another state or two. It blew my mind when I worked at a gas station and had people ask me to show them how to pump their own gas, as they had never done it before in their lives.
The first time I ever went to Oregon, I pulled up to a gas station right off the interstate in the middle of nowhere and some sketchy looking guy walks up and knocks on my window and I'm thinking yep, about to get murdered.
It was the station attendant because you can't pump your own gas in Oregon.
Wait what. Is this a real thing?
Yeah, it's real there and I think in another state or two. It blew my mind when I worked at a gas station and had people ask me to show them how to pump their own gas, as they had never done it before in their lives.
This is the case in New Jersey as well.
I'm proud of myself for remembering that off the top of my head
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Maybe he is keeping the list of the good non wizards. They get to live when the wizard war comes.
but they're listening to every word I say
On the other hand, I was buying beer at my local corner store one time, when a guy walked in and starting hawking toasters and other small appliances out of a Macy's shopping bag. When I told him I didn't want to buy his toaster, he grew angry, called me a "jive turkey" and then said "There's no love in this world anymore."
edit: I have to tell you. Life is never the same once someone calls you a jive turkey in anger.
That has stuck with me my whole life, and my dad gives to the people he finds genuine and I've done the same all my life.
In fucking Vancouver it's the worst because so many of them have dogs and I'm so weak to homeless animals.
i never understood the appeal of paying for a handjob
like, i have my own hands right here! that know what feels good!
anyway i guess i occasionally give a couple bucks to someone who seems like they need it, if i happen to have change on me
and try not to get too annoyed when they tell me i should give them more
it definitely annoys me when decent street musicians are put into the same category though, give them a fiver at least, if you stop and listen to a song or two!
and a dude sitting on the sidewalk asked me for money and I happened to have change in my hand
so I leant over and dropped it in his cup
which I instantly realized was full of coffee
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
I can watch misdirection videos on youtube for hours
I can't imagine he thought derren brown was going to run off with the watch and keys and phone, just that he needed them for a second for some reason, but he isn't given any time to think about that before the conversation is already over
"thank you, you're fine, thank you"
Like, was he thinking specifically about that starving orphan he keeps chained up in the woodshed? Or was that just a coincidence?
Now, I don't want to pre-judge everyone just because these stories are so common - so I offer to go shopping or share a cab with them! No takers yet.
But there was one time, the dude was so aggressive I was honestly worried for the safety of myself and my gf.
We were walking home late one night from a movie and a very tall dude just kind of walks up to us from a vacant parking lot. He then proceeds to tell us a story that has basically combined elements from about 4 other stories of this type. I'm very tired, and also a little on edge given the seclution of this area, so I appologize to the dude and say "Sorry man, no cash on either of us - have a good night and good luck."
"Well, there's an ATM over there!" He says and points "Let's go get some cash!" and he steps towards us. At this point I step in between him and my gf and say "No way man. I don't know you. We're going home."
He steps even closer (at this point he's maybe 12 inches away from me). "Come on! Where do you live? I'll come with you and you can get some money from there."
And this point my fight or flight kicked in and I started pushing my gf back from him and told him in no uncertain terms that it was time for him to leave - and I told my girlfriend to get home and then call the cops. I was fully expecting for this guy to jump me at this point but all I was really concerned about was making sure he didn't get to my gf.
Luckily this spooked the dude enough that he backed up and took off. It was pretty scary.
Uh-oh I accidentally deleted my signature. Uh-oh!!
I've given car rides at night to hitchhikers and other strange folk who just happened to walk up to my car and knock on the window outside of a diner at 2 a.m.
I've let strangers who approach me on the street use my cell phone.
Outside of that one time I got robbed at gunpoint after letting someone use my phone, nothing bad ever came of any of it.
Or at least I used to be really trusting. To be honest, that one robbery kind of resulted in me involuntarily shying away from random people who approach me on the street. Although I'm working on getting back to where I used to be on that.
whoa that's one tough + cool dude
(that's right, it's in spanish)
they usually have props
gas can, ancient flip cell phone
I promise I am a roughly middle-class individual just like you experiencing what amounts to a high-level inconvenience and not someone who lacks reliable access to one or more of the basic human needs
please, I promise
"Hey, can I get a ride home? My girlfriend is at work and I was taken here by ambulance."
I paused for a second. "What were you in for?"
"Celiac attack."
"Let me look at your paperwork."
(I was working with the hospital at the time and was checking to see if this was a forgery - it was on the level)
"Where do you live?"
He told me.
"Yeah, sure," I said, and he got in.
We're driving, making small talk - he paints water towers for a living, he feels very blessed to have his girlfriend - and I have to stop for gas in a rough part of town. He runs into the 7/11 to get cigarettes and water, and this dude walks up to me.
"Hey, you want some crack?"
I was taken aback; I don't think a: look like a crack addict and b: look like someone who would ever be interested in crack.
The hitchhikers busts out of the 7/11 and starts yelling at the guy, who eventually backs off and leaves.
The hitcher turns to me. "You almost got robbed. Soon as you got your wallet out, he was gonna take it. What was he tryin'a sell?"
"Crack."
The hitcher pauses. "The fuck?"
"Right?"
The hitcher borrows my phone and calls his girlfriend, letting her know what happens, and I drop him off at the CVS up the block from his house so he can get meds - I had a prior engagement and was now running late. He gave me some money for gas and then friended me on Facebook. I went out clubbing with him a few times, but we've since fallen out of contact and the last I heard, he had left the state; his girlfriend eventually left him and he became suicidal and wanted to stay with his family in Florida.
I wonder if he's okay?
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor
My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
I just always humor him on his rambles and then tell him we've said the same stuff to each other five times
TL;DR I got a giftcard for shoes and after some awkward stuff gave it to someone else.
I got this $25 gift card for shoes from Payless from a Christmas party my apartments had. I thought, how often do I buy shoes? Once, in maybe 4 years? So I get it in my head that I'm going to go to the mall (where there's a Payless) and make someone's holiday better by buying them some shoes. The only problem is that my name's on a sticker on the card so I would actually have to basically go shoe shopping with a total stranger for this to work.
It never occurred to me once that it sounded like a scam.
I walked up to a random person and said "It's the holidays, I'm in a giving mood, would you like some free shoes with this card here?" 8 people refused politely. Rejected, I went into a store and asked an employee what they would do with the card. They said they'd love to take me up on the offer, but they were at work so they couldn't.
After a couple more tries I went to the local grocery store to get some lunch. While there I went to the customer service desk and explained my story, asking if they knew anyone who would want free shoes. One of the girls behind the counter said in a joking manner "Heh, I'd take it."
I ripped the sticker with my name on it off the card and gave it to her. She couldn't believe it at first. I told her it was her's now since I meant to give it someone.
Way to pull a Bateman
:bzz:
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
One summer, there was a pair of legit college kids probably doing some kind of social experiment outside of one of the subway stations in the city. They had signs that were too well written, and because it was summer, and it gets pretty humid in Toronto, the girl was in a two piece bathing suit, looking clean, highlights in her hair and wearing Ray-Ban sunglasses. The guy had bermuda shorts, bleached hair, a gym-toned bod and flipflops. They were "recently homeless".
Good luck with that.
Steam: TheArcadeBear
My senior year, I played Dogberry in a production of 'Much Ado About Nothing' set in the antebellum south; I gave it my all and tried to make the comedy physical knowing that our audience wouldn't particularly understand the malapropisms, but the director reigned me in. The best joke I could muster was a sweat stain; in my first scene, it was barely visible around my neck, but with each progressive scene I was in, I would add more and more water back-stage until the front of the shirt was completely saturated. My entrances would get laughs. The audience tracked the stain. I went off book one time, the last night of the show, when an actor also broke what we had rehearsed and ended up throwing a plate of cookies at the actor playing Leanato. On my entrance, I walked in, delivered my line, picked up a cookie off the stage, and began to eat it.
That's neither here nor there - just me rambling.
For our shows, we would put a banner out in front of the theater with the lead casts headshots on them. We had a photographer come in to do these headshots - our theater department took itself very seriously, and we usually pulled more money in than the football team, so it paid off - and I decided to have my picture taken in character. Smug, glancing up over my glasses with my head tilted down, and a half grin.
A student saw the picture and said, "I would totally buy a shirt with that picture on it. But you'd have to put the word 'ACE' underneath."
So I did that. I went to cafepress.com and I did a mockup of the shirt. I showed a few students, and before I knew it, I was taking pre-orders. With the money given - and a generous $5 markup on my part - I bought the shirts and distributed them to around 20 people. They all wore them whenever, and eventually, more and more people started looking to buy the shirts.
I took a second round of pre-orders, this time, around 30 or so, but I ended up moving to New York a week ahead of schedule, so the shirts never came.
I've made amends to the people on the pre-order list, either reimbursing them - this was almost 10 years ago - or doing good deeds. Save for one girl; she pre-ordered an ACE shirt and never got it. When I moved back from New York with a glaring case of Overestimating My Abilities as a Writer and Disenfranchisement with the Boheim Lifestyle - she approached me in a Barnes and Noble.
"I'm so sorry," I said. "I can either get you the shirt now, or I can give you your money back."
"How about you take me out to dinner instead."
I did. It fizzled after about 10 minutes. As it turns out, when you're a nebbish, neurotic man, the intrigue built around the stories you left behind don't usually coalesce with the reality.
-
Two more stories relating to the ACE shirt.
A group of Freshman, my senior year, had... become sort of a fan club. They made up the majority of the first and only round of orders. And to celebrate my moving to New York, they coordinated an ACE Friday; what was to be a once a month event where they would wear the shirt to celebrate the fact that I had gone on to other things.
The first ACE Friday, I get a panicked call from my mother.
Apparently, the administration had thought this was some sort of memorial tribute and that I had killed myself shortly after leaving the state. Seeing a swarm of Sophomores roaming the halls, all wearing a shirt with my face plastered on it was apparently eerie and disconcerting, and the administration took it to mean that the worst had happened.
ACE Friday's never happened again.
-
I was telling this story to my roommate as we were driving to see Interstellar; my Dad was treating, and my brother was meeting us there.
"You're so full of shit," she said, as we were standing with my Dad, tickets in hand, waiting for my brother to show up.
"What's the shit he's full of?" he said, appearing phantomlike from behind a pillar.
"This whole ACE shirt thing."
My brother stared at me for a second, unbuttoned his overshirt, to reveal the ACE shirt serving as an undershirt.
It should also be noted that although he and my father did not coordinate, they both showed up wearing the same purple hued button up tucked into jeans.
-
I was also the mascot for a nationally ranking laser-tag team based on my Senior ID picture, but that's a story for another day.
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor
My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
So, a little background. I work in the Contact Centre of a state owned financial administrator, so we handle the finances of a number of people with disabilities, people with substance abuse issues, the elderly. So basically, anyone who the State have decided cannot handle their own finances, and there are no friends or family members to assist, the control of their finances falls to us.
So, you can imagine the kind of stories we hear from people, in an attempt to get a little bit of extra cash. (Note: The money we hold is certainly their own, and we really try to give them money whenever they need it, but sometimes, we have to say no, for their own benefit).
There's this sweet old lady, and she calls all the time for extra money, but it's always for the same thing. Milk and Bread. That's it. I know for sure that she isn't using the money for that, but I have this mental image of her with multiple walls, filled with milk and bread, like some kind of holy shrine to the Gods of Yeast and Dairy.
And another one, where I only heard this second hand, so I can't verify the legitimacy of the story, but honestly having spoken with the person in question, this would not surprise me.
This gentleman came into the head office one day, holding a very young child, claiming it to be his, and in desperate need for funds to look after the child. Well, as you could imagine, the powers that be were rather intrigued, as this seemed to be the first time that anyone had been notified of him having a child, let alone helping to raise one. Well, after a bit of careful investigation, turns out, he had approached a lady, convinced her that if he could "borrow" the child, he would be able to get some money, for both him and herself, to which she agreed.
I really enjoy the stories that come out of my work sometimes.
In the last five years, I've lost a fiance to suicide, I've been fired, the four years I spent on my self published book went to naught as it flopped hard; I've gotten a job after wracking up $7,000 in living expenses while trying to find a job - six months after signing a lease to an apartment to move out of my childhood home - adopted a kitten which bankrupted my savings when she required emergency surgery, and in the last month alone have had car expenses that have gotten into the... many more-dollars-than-I-have-range - and my workload has quadrupled in the last month due to restructuring at my company. And my best friend and roommate is at home in Chicago for Christmas. I was supposed to go with her but couldn't get the time off work or afford the flight.
But when you say something like that - and I mean this earnestly - makes me feel like a person instead of a failure.
"Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor
My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!
bro hugs man
x50
Learn that from Goku?
My mom is a lot of things but shes really good at identifying scams. Like one christmas there was this guy by the mall begging for money and had like a suitcae people were tossing bills in, she pointed out to me that the guy was wearing a nice jacket, the suitcase was leather, he had cufflinks on under the coat, and he obviously had recently had his hair/moustache cut, but like 60% of the people didn't pay attention and just tossed a couple of singles in the case.
Though when I'm at GenCon I always give money to the guys with the funny signs. Indianapolis seems to have a lot of homeless dudes. Like the last time I went one dude had a sign that read "Help, warrior out of healing potions and our cleric is dead. Need $$ to buy a resurrection scroll" and I was like "Yeah ok, $5 man. Thats pretty good.
Wait what. Is this a real thing?
Yeah, it's real there and I think in another state or two. It blew my mind when I worked at a gas station and had people ask me to show them how to pump their own gas, as they had never done it before in their lives.
Then last year I wasn't even out of my car yet before this lady came up and started with her bullshit story, and I had to threaten calling the cops before she'd go away.
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
These are my favorite kinds of stories (Well not the end) about meeting people. Like when I was younger, before facebook, we would go camping a lot and you'd meet the other kids whos parents spent a lot of time camping at state parks and you'd like, for a bond that lasted for a weekend, these are you president's day friends, and these are your fourth of july friends. And of course there was the core group, but I've found you don't have that as an adult.
Like I worked at a movie theater for years, I was a manager and one very cold and snowy night I was headed to my car at the end of the night, like 2 am and theres this young dude in his car with a lady. He comes out and approaches me, hes like maybe 19 or 20 and I could tell he was at least trying to look like he was some sort of badass by the way he walked and dressed and talked but basically seemed ok. His car died, I tried to jump it, no go, so he needed to get towed but the tow truck said it would be an hour or two until they arrived, so we needed to say near. The only thing I could do was unlock the theater and let them in, so I did. Of course I had to stay, and honestly I feel asleep on a bench. The guy and his (I then learned) pregnant girlfriend sat on another bench warming up, I grabbed them an blanket (ok look I took naps in the projection booth) warmed them up some pretsels, got them soda/water and we just hung out for awhile while we waited for the tow truck. I never told my boss, she'd of been pissed I opened myself and the theater up to so much liability, but every time after that the guy came in the see a movie hed ask for me and hed always shake my hand and thank me and we'd chat a bit. It feels good, ya know?
This is the case in New Jersey as well.
I'm proud of myself for remembering that off the top of my head