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Australian Election [chat]

simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a differencetoday, a differenceRegistered User regular
edited July 2016 in Debate and/or Discourse
Strewth, fellow cobbers! It's election season, it is! Bloomin' onion oath, the election's tomorrow, and I haven't even shined me dress blue wifebeater! Now I don't have none of them fancy know-smarts, being a venerable and wise tradie, but I can tell you about the main runners in the coming election season, by crikey.

jCabjSil.jpg

Malcolm Turnbull is leader of the Liberals, the current mob in government. Their main policy so far as I can tell is destroying everything in the name of fiscal responsibility, and then spending billions on some new submarines and a plebiscite on gay marriage in the name of fiscal responsibility. A bunch of right-centre chundertossers.

ymq7oSZl.jpg

Bill Shorten is the leader of the Labor party, a bloke so bland I genuinely had to Bing me up a Google of "labor leader" to remember his bloody name, oi. They're the better of the two main parties, but gor lummy this was their election to lose and they took that challenge like Skippy taking a hop around the bush and saving some baby from a dingo, too roight.

BVtO8P7l.jpg

Richard Di Natale is the leader of the Greens, some pooftah mob of tree-hugging hippies who wouldn't know a hard day's work in the red Australian earth if it came up and kicked 'em in the bum, I tell you what.

Now, who are you voting for, you lot? Because I know where my first preference is going!

Y6qgCh4l.jpg

Crack open a Fosters and smear some Vegemite on your willy, mates, it's time to vote!

simonwolf on
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Posts

  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    i expected more

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    I literally hacked Geth for you, my good simon.

    I hope that you are pleased.

  • Mojo_JojoMojo_Jojo We are only now beginning to understand the full power and ramifications of sexual intercourse Registered User regular
    I don't want to see any of our politicians even mention sex. They must remain pure and unsullied by the lure of foreign genitalia

    Homogeneous distribution of your varieties of amuse-gueule
  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    can you feel the struggle within?
  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    I don't want to see any of our politicians even mention sex. They must remain pure and unsullied by the lure of foreign genitalia

    I don't know. I kind of enjoyed having a sitting president who was an insatiable poon hound.

    can you feel the struggle within?
  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    I don't want to see any of our politicians even mention sex. They must remain pure and unsullied by the lure of foreign genitalia

    All except for the leader of our xenophobe party who has probably spent the last week having gross sex with his german wife

  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

  • EddyEddy Gengar the Bittersweet Registered User regular
    @skippydumptruck I brought my quickfire mx brown to the office after dealing with the default low profile rubber domes for a week

    What a world of difference

    "and the morning stars I have seen
    and the gengars who are guiding me" -- W.S. Merwin
  • AbdhyiusAbdhyius Registered User regular
    Finally got that fucking verification email - after an hour - and I'm playing Elite: Dangerous


    first impression: oh my god the flight scheme is terrible

    ftOqU21.png
  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Casual wrote: »
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

    The Sex Party are pretty much rivals to the Greens, in that they are left-wing hippies who believe in personal freedoms in sex, drugs, and rock and roll. They want marriage equality, moving towards legalised drugs, religious organisations to be taxed, humanitarian relief and refugee intake, etc. Socially libertarian, I guess?

  • SixSix Caches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhex Registered User regular
    Casual wrote: »
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlMwc1c0HRQ

    can you feel the struggle within?
  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    simonwolf wrote: »
    Casual wrote: »
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

    The Sex Party are pretty much rivals to the Greens, in that they are left-wing hippies who believe in personal freedoms in sex, drugs, and rock and roll. They want marriage equality, moving towards legalised drugs, religious organisations to be taxed, humanitarian relief and refugee intake, etc. Socially libertarian, I guess?

    mhmm mhmm yes but

    what about their policies specifically regarding sex?

    do i get more sex if they're elected to government?

  • syndalissyndalis Getting Classy On the WallRegistered User, Loves Apple Products regular
    Six wrote: »
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    I don't want to see any of our politicians even mention sex. They must remain pure and unsullied by the lure of foreign genitalia

    I don't know. I kind of enjoyed having a sitting president who was an insatiable poon hound.

    It really helped that he was largely so damn good at his job, and at being charismatic as fuck.

    SW-4158-3990-6116
    Let's play Mario Kart or something...
  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Casual wrote: »
    simonwolf wrote: »
    Casual wrote: »
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

    The Sex Party are pretty much rivals to the Greens, in that they are left-wing hippies who believe in personal freedoms in sex, drugs, and rock and roll. They want marriage equality, moving towards legalised drugs, religious organisations to be taxed, humanitarian relief and refugee intake, etc. Socially libertarian, I guess?

    mhmm mhmm yes but

    what about their policies specifically regarding sex?

    do i get more sex if they're elected to government?

    Yes, but it's with Angry Anderson

  • TavTav Irish Minister for DefenceRegistered User regular
    just realised the big ass festival I'm doing is in two weeks

    Excited to see Kendrick

  • Sir LandsharkSir Landshark resting shark face Registered User regular
    Tav wrote: »
    just realised the big ass festival I'm doing is in two weeks

    Excited to see Kendrick

    omg Anna Kendrick?

    Please consider the environment before printing this post.
  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    bloody chunder, mates

    put another wallaby on the barbie, bruce

    you either didgeridoo or didgeridon't

  • TTODewbackTTODewback Puts the drawl in ya'll I think I'm in HellRegistered User regular
    Tav wrote: »
    just realised the big ass festival I'm doing is in two weeks

    Excited to see Kendrick
    Festivals that celebrate large posteriors are p good.

    Bless your heart.
  • LudiousLudious I just wanted a sandwich A temporally dislocated QuiznosRegistered User regular
    Well that was depressing. I had a good appointment with my Psychologist yesterday. We're starting on cognitive behavioral therapy stuff.

    I felt encouraged so I was trying to find some sort of liberal/democrat/progressive group or space for people in my area. I looked through meetup.com local subreddits, straight up googling, and there's just...nothing

    Yet I know these people exist, hell my town has a democrat mayor but God damn good luck finding them. I feel like I have to say the password to the right dude on the corner of some street or something

  • override367override367 ALL minions Registered User regular
    i bought an overwatch t-shirt

    so does it come with a trillby or do I have to buy that seperately

  • CasualCasual Wiggle Wiggle Wiggle Flap Flap Flap Registered User regular
    simonwolf wrote: »
    Casual wrote: »
    simonwolf wrote: »
    Casual wrote: »
    i would like to hear more about the policies of the sex party

    The Sex Party are pretty much rivals to the Greens, in that they are left-wing hippies who believe in personal freedoms in sex, drugs, and rock and roll. They want marriage equality, moving towards legalised drugs, religious organisations to be taxed, humanitarian relief and refugee intake, etc. Socially libertarian, I guess?

    mhmm mhmm yes but

    what about their policies specifically regarding sex?

    do i get more sex if they're elected to government?

    Yes, but it's with Angry Anderson

    once again golden promises turn to bitter ash...

  • DeebaserDeebaser on my way to work in a suit and a tie Ahhhh...come on fucking guyRegistered User regular
    Six wrote: »
    Mojo_Jojo wrote: »
    I don't want to see any of our politicians even mention sex. They must remain pure and unsullied by the lure of foreign genitalia

    I don't know. I kind of enjoyed having a sitting president who was an insatiable poon hound.

    At the time, sure. In retrospect he's kinda gross and rapey.

  • BeNarwhalBeNarwhal The Work Left Unfinished Registered User regular
    Okay [chat], it is time for me to disrobe and cleanse myself of yesterday's sins.

    I will return when I am once again pure. Do good and be well. <3

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Ludious wrote: »
    Well that was depressing. I had a good appointment with my Psychologist yesterday. We're starting on cognitive behavioral therapy stuff.

    I felt encouraged so I was trying to find some sort of liberal/democrat/progressive group or space for people in my area. I looked through meetup.com local subreddits, straight up googling, and there's just...nothing

    Yet I know these people exist, hell my town has a democrat mayor but God damn good luck finding them. I feel like I have to say the password to the right dude on the corner of some street or something

    Mississippi speakeasies

    they look like a Piggly Wiggly on the outside but inside they're safe spaces for people who believe in progressive taxation

  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Tav wrote: »
    just realised the big ass festival I'm doing is in two weeks

    Excited to see Kendrick

    Anna Kendrick?

  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    My sister's Australian now and it's true now she's named Bruce

    Take a moment to donate what you can to Critical Resistance and Black Lives Matter.
  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    Australia is having elections again?

    Haven't you already had a half dozen prime ministers in the last three years?

    You guys need to just stick with one.

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    tie me kangaroo down, sheila

  • MazzyxMazzyx Comedy Gold Registered User regular
    Abdhyius wrote: »
    Finally got that fucking verification email - after an hour - and I'm playing Elite: Dangerous


    first impression: oh my god the flight scheme is terrible

    Redo it.

    I had to change a bunch of settings to get the feeling right. But I could.

    I agree the default is bad.

    u7stthr17eud.png
  • LudiousLudious I just wanted a sandwich A temporally dislocated QuiznosRegistered User regular
    At least I found our mayor's wikipedia page.

    God damn:

    Moran graduated from Georgetown University with bachelor's and master's degrees in finance/economics and international commerce. She graduated cum laude. Moran conducted graduate research at the Institute of World Economics in Germany as a Fulbright Scholar. She was also an economist at the World Trade Organization in Geneva. She is a former fellow of the Robert Bosch Foundation for German American Leadership, where she worked for the German Ministry of France. In 2006, she was selected to be the Bosch Alumnus of the Year for her leadership in Hurricane Katrina recovery efforts.[3]

  • AtomikaAtomika Live fast and get fucked or whatever Registered User regular
    Australia is having elections again?

    Haven't you already had a half dozen prime ministers in the last three years?

    You guys need to just stick with one.

    between the sharks and spiders and mutant emus, everyone keeps getting eaten

  • DeebaserDeebaser on my way to work in a suit and a tie Ahhhh...come on fucking guyRegistered User regular
    i bought an overwatch t-shirt

    so does it come with a trillby or do I have to buy that seperately

    separately. Get some "funny" pins to put on the trilby. It enhances the panty dropping power of it.

  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    Australia is having elections again?

    Haven't you already had a half dozen prime ministers in the last three years?

    You guys need to just stick with one.

    Four, and technically speaking "we the people" don't elect the prime minister, we elect representatives who form government who then have a leader who becomes prime minister

    Because it isn't a directly elected position it becomes open to party room coups, as both the Liberals and Labor have experienced

  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    Yeah Elite has some weird controls to start but you can wrestle them into shape.

    Hahaha like I'm just remembering the default "landing gear" button is right next to the "jettison all cargo" button.

    Like what the fuck guys why

    Take a moment to donate what you can to Critical Resistance and Black Lives Matter.
  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    "Liberal" sounds like a nice name for a party. I am a liberal. I vote them for first preference.

  • simonwolfsimonwolf i can feel a difference today, a differenceRegistered User regular
    we also have a three year federal election cycle, which is peachy keen

  • Harry DresdenHarry Dresden Registered User regular
    Australia is having elections again?

    Haven't you already had a half dozen prime ministers in the last three years?

    You guys need to just stick with one.

    It's traditional in Australia for whoever elected to get a coup half way through now. 2 PM's for 1!

  • override367override367 ALL minions Registered User regular
    Deebaser wrote: »
    i bought an overwatch t-shirt

    so does it come with a trillby or do I have to buy that seperately

    separately. Get some "funny" pins to put on the trilby. It enhances the panty dropping power of it.

    Do I have to carry the D.va body pillow around with me when I wear the shirt or is it enough to just put it in my facebook profile picture

  • Solomaxwell6Solomaxwell6 Registered User regular
    simonwolf wrote: »
    Australia is having elections again?

    Haven't you already had a half dozen prime ministers in the last three years?

    You guys need to just stick with one.

    Four, and technically speaking "we the people" don't elect the prime minister, we elect representatives who form government who then have a leader who becomes prime minister

    Because it isn't a directly elected position it becomes open to party room coups, as both the Liberals and Labor have experienced

    Here's what I recommend:

    install a dictator for life

  • override367override367 ALL minions Registered User regular
    oh god D.Va body pillows actually exist

This discussion has been closed.