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[Love] is a Battlefield

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Posts

  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    So my wife is off to Mexico in December for her job. It's a root phenotyping conference. I'm a bit worried for her safety but I know I shouldn't be as the conference are organising buses and taxis etc and she'll be spending all her time with the delegates hobnobbing with the scientists.

    Though I does mean I get a week to live like a slob the week before Christmas, party time!

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

    Was he scared, or just overwhelmed by his own inadequacies after witnessing your magnificence?

  • VeldrinVeldrin Sham bam bamina Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

    Was he scared, or just overwhelmed by his own inadequacies after witnessing your magnificence?

    Well I'd only just dragged myself out of bed a couple of minutes prior, so he was probably startled at encountering a real life bush troll more than anything.

  • LiiyaLiiya Registered User regular
    "localfuckbuddy4u" was reported and blocked. Now he has evolved into "localfuckbuddy4u8" with the same pictures, same lines but brand new determination!

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    Can't stop the signal I guess.

  • Mortal SkyMortal Sky queer punk hedge witchRegistered User regular
    Mortal Sky wrote: »
    Over the last four weeks the ladyfriend and I have been transitioning into an open thing

    So far it is working nicely and I think most of that has been the twelve day vacation we just took together, but her only being about two hours away also helps

    wait no I meant to say long distance thing

    how did I freudian slip that one

    not that we're the most monogamous couple ever, mind, so openness correlating with distance may be a thing? still sorta figuring that one out

  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

    Was he scared, or just overwhelmed by his own inadequacies after witnessing your magnificence?

    Backlit? hmmm. I bet it was the shadow's fault.

    https://youtu.be/TTPIz4yXaqA

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    "8/25/2016 7:02:42 AM
    Hi


    8/25/2016 8:10:00 AM
    Didn't mean to message you clicked on wrong person"

    Excuse me while I cry myself to sleep.

    I need to go back to the doctor about my thyroid as I'm fat and sleepy again, but it's almost a month until I'm back in London. I think I'll stop weighing myself so I don't have to see the weight creeping up. And embrace napping for the next month.

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    So I set up a date with "pretty-but-mostly-unknown" lady. Gonna have dinner and some drinks at a place with live music that I've been meaning to check out (an apparent rarity in my town). She seems quite enthusiastic about the idea! And then she tacks on "What do you want to do after drinks?"

    What, uh... what is your guys' read on that?

  • KarlKarl Registered User regular
    More drinks?

    Is there some kind of activity you guys can do?

    Not shagging, I mean like bowling?

    Ok maybe shagging if both of you are open to the idea, jesus you're adults I'm not your dad

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited August 2016
    I am kinda hoping she is not implying shagging, because I am a delicate flower and that is way too fast for me.

    Dang, I would totally suggest bowing, that is an awesome idea.

    I need to figure out if there is any place to go bowling around here.

    There is but it is like 4 km away, and there will be no driving. At least I know where I can go bowling, though, good on ya, Karl!

    sarukun on
  • KarlKarl Registered User regular
    Also in bed related news, the blanket cold war is on hold as she is back in her home town for the weekend.

    Ironically it's been too hot to use the blanket so I do not get the benefit.

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    You can say you're not sure and ask if there's anything she wants to do. See if her reply says shagging in any way.

    I'm usually the opposite with a first date, I tell them the end time beforehand and extend the date if I like them.

  • KarlKarl Registered User regular
    I'm a big fan of just drinks on the first date.

    Adding dinner as well is too risky.

    What if they're terrible.

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    Karl wrote: »
    I'm a big fan of just drinks on the first date.

    Adding dinner as well is too risky.

    What if they're terrible.

    Yeah, I've done early afternoon dates and then suddenly I can see the next 10 hideous hours of my life stretched out before me. I tend to have a 3 hour limit for a first date, preferably 2.

  • LiiyaLiiya Registered User regular
    "I must admit you are pretty".

    Must admit! A gun has been held to his head! He must confess or face the stocks!

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    Nah, he's just on a bus and he needs to send 65 messages to pretty girls an hour or the bus will explode.

  • Blake TBlake T Do you have enemies then? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered User regular
    I think they're going to make it into a movie.

    I heard they were going to call it, "The bus that couldn't slow down"

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    Well he's not wrong

    Lacking enthusiasm though tut tut

  • KarlKarl Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    Karl wrote: »
    I'm a big fan of just drinks on the first date.

    Adding dinner as well is too risky.

    What if they're terrible.

    Yeah, I've done early afternoon dates and then suddenly I can see the next 10 hideous hours of my life stretched out before me. I tend to have a 3 hour limit for a first date, preferably 2.

    I would classify 3 hours a really good first date.

    That's about how long my first date with my girlfriend.

    The cocktails also helped
    We go fucked up on a weekday because YOLO

  • OmnipotentBagelOmnipotentBagel floof Registered User regular
    Liiya wrote: »
    "I must admit you are pretty".

    Must admit! A gun has been held to his head! He must confess or face the stocks!

    Maybe he's normally very shy but your beauty compelled him to speak. What if you are literally enchanting?

    cdci44qazyo3.gif

  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    edited August 2016
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

    Was he scared, or just overwhelmed by his own inadequacies after witnessing your magnificence?

    Well I'd only just dragged myself out of bed a couple of minutes prior, so he was probably startled at encountering a real life bush troll more than anything.

    so you had sexy bed head AND had a pupper with you

    the poor guy probably orgasmed so hard he fell over

    Magic Pink on
  • GhotiGhoti Registered User regular
    Liiya wrote: »
    "I must admit you are pretty".

    Must admit! A gun has been held to his head! He must confess or face the stocks!

    Maybe he's normally very shy but your beauty compelled him to speak. What if you are literally enchanting?

    Another possibility is that he does not want to come off as objectifying... there was a time I held my compliments because it seemed like a minefield on how it would have been taken. Then I just got over it.

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    Maybe he should talk about her profile then, rather than her face.

  • OmnipotentBagelOmnipotentBagel floof Registered User regular
    We all know Liiya is pretty. To stand out from the crowd, you gotta know more than that.

    cdci44qazyo3.gif

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    You should always open with profile stuff IMO

  • Magic PinkMagic Pink Tur-Boner-Fed Registered User regular
    We all know Liiya is pretty. To stand out from the crowd, you gotta know more than that.


    I know she's British!

    I WIN

  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    After watching the truly weirdly bad John Carter of Mars she kept on asking me if a princess of mars could ever marry a wayward cavalryman like her

    Take a moment to donate what you can to Critical Resistance and Black Lives Matter.
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    You can say you're not sure and ask if there's anything she wants to do. See if her reply says shagging in any way.

    I'm usually the opposite with a first date, I tell them the end time beforehand and extend the date if I like them.


    This is a solid plan. I'm thinking about just saying "we'll see" and brining something else to do in mind.
    Karl wrote: »
    I'm a big fan of just drinks on the first date.

    Adding dinner as well is too risky.

    What if they're terrible.

    I've never had a date so totally disastrous that I had to leave early, but I am absolutely not above saying "Look, this isn't really working out, and I'm sorry about that, but I'm gonna go."

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Magic Pink wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    Love thread, I unintentionally scared the crap out of a guy going jogging while I was happily walking my dog early this morning.

    He didn't see us until he was up close and I think we were backlit by a streetlight. He jumped so hard that he got the wobble legs going and almost fell over in the middle of the road.

    I am a neigbourhood nuisance.

    Was he scared, or just overwhelmed by his own inadequacies after witnessing your magnificence?

    Well I'd only just dragged myself out of bed a couple of minutes prior, so he was probably startled at encountering a real life bush troll more than anything.

    so you had sexy bed head AND had a pupper with you

    the poor guy probably orgasmed so hard he fell over

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LhtmV13bRdc

    ??

  • GhotiGhoti Registered User regular
    Usually I am complimenting a look rather than just the physical features of a person. Maybe there is a different connotation in person than online.

    As to talking speaking to the profile, how do you know that he did not? I think there is missing context there.

  • FAQFAQ Registered User regular
    I open all my messages with "hey dollface"

  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    edited August 2016
    Solar wrote: »
    You should always open with profile stuff IMO

    I always felt so lost as to what to write for a first message when matched wih someone without any personal interest in neither profile nor any clues in their pictures.
    FAQ wrote: »
    I open all my messages with "hey dollface"

    Bonus points if your profile states that you collect fine porcelain.

    honovere on
  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    Oh I hope he wrote a wonderfully detailed message about what he loved about her profile. Past experience tells me it's unlikely.

  • OmnipotentBagelOmnipotentBagel floof Registered User regular
    Ghoti wrote: »
    Usually I am complimenting a look rather than just the physical features of a person. Maybe there is a different connotation in person than online.

    As to talking speaking to the profile, how do you know that he did not? I think there is missing context there.

    "Missing context" tends to be the common factor with these sorts of fellas.

    cdci44qazyo3.gif

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    Doing some modding on okc because I feel too ill for anything productive. There's a whole lot of nudity on there today.

  • OmnipotentBagelOmnipotentBagel floof Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    Doing some modding on okc because I feel too ill for anything productive. There's a whole lot of nudity on there today.

    Any of it entertaining nudity, at least?

    cdci44qazyo3.gif

  • AngelinaAngelina Registered User regular
    Mainly porn, some boobs of the actual person. No creative poses so far.

  • OmnipotentBagelOmnipotentBagel floof Registered User regular
    Angelina wrote: »
    Mainly porn, some boobs of the actual person. No creative poses so far.

    How dull.

    cdci44qazyo3.gif

This discussion has been closed.