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[5E OOC] Before the Darkness - "Who Watches the Poopmen"

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    the next time we find a magic weapon tied to magical runes in an area, we're just going to leave it, right?

  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Melding wrote: »
    the next time we find a magic weapon tied to magical runes in an area, we're just going to leave it, right?

    Hilariously, that will be the one that's safe to take.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    I spent a good moment looking through the legendary items only to remember that none of them are particularly interesting for a druid

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    can always get an intelligent shield

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    bonus points if it's dumb as a brick and loves taking hits

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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    who wants to bet the name of the next episode is "Don't Worry About It"

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    or "things to worry about: Ghasts"

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    I'm may tone down the accent a bit next game

    really didn't want to go in that deep, but no promises either way

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  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Hi everyone! Hope you're ready for...
    Before The Darkness
    Season 2, Episode 2
    "I hate gnomes, Zephy! I hate 'em!"

  • iguanacusiguanacus Desert PlanetRegistered User regular
    Rainfall wrote: »
    Hi everyone! Hope you're ready for...
    Before The Darkness
    Season 2, Episode 2
    "I hate gnomes, Zephy! I hate 'em!"

    With their wee little arms, and their wee little legs.

  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    In point of fact, Rahab maintains perfectly cordial professional relationships with a number of Gnomes.
    All of whom are so far unaware that Maledict, behind the Disguise Self, seethes with disgust.

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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    so is Rahab Jerry and George

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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    to be fair, our last party more closely resembled the seinfeld cast

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    for the record, Elidana could dance.

  • iguanacusiguanacus Desert PlanetRegistered User regular
    I'm sure she believes that.

  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    edited December 2017
    Melding wrote: »
    for the record, Elidana could dance.

    That's because she's not the Elaine. She's the George. Sorry. But search your heart, you know it's true - Interacts with the world primarily through arguing, morally questionable bargain-making often drives the plot, history of bad relationships above and beyond the generally dysfunctional group average, being exiled is roughly comparable to living with your parents until you get kicked out. Auraj is clearly the Kramer, but you know, back when it was OK to be the Kramer - there is a fundamental inhumanity at the heart of Kramer, a sense that he is an outsider dwelling among us to study us. Angus is the Jerry - his life was as much a mess as anyone's, but he at least had ambition and a plan that was longer term than just surviving the current chaos. Tusk is the Elaine - somehow comes across as charming despite having the literal opposite of functional social skills, has a lethal temper that could maybe stand to be kept on a shorter leash.

    We come across more sympathetic as the cast of Friends. Elidana is the Monica, Auraj is the Phoebe, Tusk is the Joey, Angus is the Rachel, and General Sparks is the Chandler. Nobody's the goddamn Ross, because none of us are completely irredeemable.

    Desert Leviathan on
    Realizing lately that I don't really trust or respect basically any of the moderators here. So, good luck with life, friends! Hit me up on Twitter @DesertLeviathan
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Okay i take it back game is cancelled forever

  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    B-but... hey... Rainfall....
    How you doin'?

    Realizing lately that I don't really trust or respect basically any of the moderators here. So, good luck with life, friends! Hit me up on Twitter @DesertLeviathan
  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Ooo! Ooo! Do Cheers, next!

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  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    Hmm. Hmmmm. Everybody is synthesis of at least two Cheers characters.

    Tusk = Woody + Norm
    Auraj = Frasier + Diane
    Elidana = Carla + Sam
    Angus = Cliff + Rebecca

    Don't ask me to make sense of this, it just feels right.

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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    this is a good thread

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    I'm not sure we could have tricked Auraj into a snipe hunt.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    she will think you literally mean sniping

    and come back proudly with a hunter's corpse

    "He was wearing orange! A terrible choice for hiding!"

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    yeah see, that's a completely different play than frasier, who knew it was a set up for a prank, but wasn't expecting to just left out in the woods all night.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Auraj will find you

    Auraj is good at finding people

    speaking of which, I've been doinking around with ranger builds for her

    a hand crossbow and shield combo looks like stupid fun

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  • iguanacusiguanacus Desert PlanetRegistered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    Auraj will find you

    Auraj is good at finding people

    speaking of which, I've been doinking around with ranger builds for her

    a hand crossbow and shield combo looks like stupid fun

    And unfortunately doesn't work because you need a free hand to load a hand crossbow

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    iguanacus wrote: »
    Dubh wrote: »
    Auraj will find you

    Auraj is good at finding people

    speaking of which, I've been doinking around with ranger builds for her

    a hand crossbow and shield combo looks like stupid fun

    And unfortunately doesn't work because you need a free hand to load a hand crossbow

    I say that's a dumb rule

    as evidenced by every video game where I can use a riot shield and a pistol

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    but pistols hold more than one bullet and are semi automatic.

    none of that describes a crossbow.

    just talk the DM into giving you a glock and all the problems go away.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    edited December 2017
    Auraj had a semi-auto crossbow, tho

    I know you're devil's advocating and all

    but the weird crossbow limitations are dumb and not fun

    Doobh on
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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    I WILL DEFEND CROSSBOWS TO THE DEATH

    WITH A CROSSBOW, IF NEED BE

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  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    crossbows are a weird one to balance because they are slow weapons when powerful, but not that much faster then they're weak. a bow with a hundred pound draw strength can punch through some shit at close ranges and be fired rather rapidly in comparison.

    Add to that the fact that cross bows aren't a romantic weapon like bows are you end up with a lot of people low efforting on crossbow stuff.

    it's like axes and swords in parts, swords get a lot more love because of the romantic idea of swords.

    it was a lot easier defending Crossbows Are Bad in DnD when they effectively just lived in simple weapons cause simple weapons are bad. 5e's weapons section has, problems.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    I'm super tired of bows and swords, and am continually surprised that everyone else isn't as well

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  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Give me the biggest most implausible sword at all times, all I want is yooge swords.

  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    swords are very good melee weapons though. specially as side arms. that's part of the reason why i went with a polearm on my paladin. Swords are a secondary weapon. polearms are are your work weapon.

    bows, bows are a weird one. a skilled archer is better than a skilled crossbowman in as far as battle utility, but the time it takes to get there is huge in comparison. it's hwy i was fine with crossbows being kinda bad when they lived in simple weapons, it reflected that the general ease of crossbow use. you put them in the same category as bows, well now you have to balance that shit and they fucked up.

    but nah, swords have been popular for over a thousand years that ain't going away.

    Editor's note: i originally wrote "me" instead of bad in the bows section, and i think that might have some deeper meaning.

  • Desert LeviathanDesert Leviathan Registered User regular
    All conventional weapons are for chumps. If you're not assembling Flying Ghost Eels from Congealed Witchcraft and having them grab dudes by the arms and yank them right the fuck in half, you should maybe take a step back and think about where your life went wrong.

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  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    spent time making a small kobold gladiator

    help, I can't stop making characters

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  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    They had semi auto crossbows during the European Medieval era
    crg5kfhq7r94.png

    So you could have a shield and crossbow style of combat just reloading it is now the problem

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Schroedinger's Clip

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  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    Thou dost ponder on my bolt supply,
    Am I now spent or do I have one more?
    And I admit, amongst the hue and cry
    I too lost count, but this I know for sure:
    The crossbow pointed squarely at your face
    Is powerful; indeed it knows no peer
    And with one motion could your head erase
    To leave behind a messy, bloody smear
    This fact must lead you to some introspection:
    "Does Fortune smile 'pon me?" must be thy question.

    Dirty Henry V, Part 1

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    sup nerds

    you ready for some

    nerdy bullshit

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