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[QUILTBAG]: The time for Pride has passed. Now is the time for Wrath.

Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMABaton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
edited July 2018 in Social Entropy++
Hey! The other thread was at 100 so I'm gonna make a new one!

Come and talk about stuff. How are things?

Quick summary of me:
I'm Erin, I came out as trans almost a year ago? (Fuck, that long already?) I've got an awesome wife named Christine, two kids, and a cat and dog. We live down in Louisiana and are taking everything a day at a time. I feel like Christine and I get closer every day and I wouldn't trade that for anything. We are exploring our Poly side and seeing how that goes. So far it's pretty great. We are talking to a beautiful and amazing woman from this very thread! (Hi Danielle :3 )

I had a nice old man come up to me at the store and say "excuse me ma'am are you familiar with wines?" And I spent like 20 minutes helping him pick a bottle for his wife :)

Also next week I'm interviewing Austin Walker
And next next week I'm interviewing Adam Koebel

Relationship stuff
Also I found out a lot of my friends (more than I thought, anyway) are poly and then Christine and I started talking about stuff and we aren't there yet, but she's said she is fine with flirty stuff, so long as she is in the loop.

Then earlier this week this awesome person from the thread told me she had a crush on me and we've been talking about stuff and it's really nice! She's very sweet (and cute!) and great to talk to.

It's been an unexpected week for sure, but I'm not complaining

Erin The Red on
«134567100

Posts

  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Hey I'm Natalie, I'm bi, I like these threads and thanks for making them, Erin!

    Since the start of the last thread I have:
    1. Bought a crapload of makeup
    2. Got on hormones
    3. Bought a crapload of lady clothes.
    4. Took a crapload of selfies.
    5. Put in legal name change papers(as of this morning)

    It was an exciting 100 pages!

  • UnbreakableVowUnbreakableVow Registered User regular
    This is low key my favorite thread, thanks for making one yet again!

  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    edited February 2018
    They have existed before me and will exist after me. Just happy to do my part.

    This has been a crazy week with lots of fun bits! Learning a lot more stuff about some long time friends (and finding out very interesting things about more recent friends too!) Talking to cool people, playing cool games. It's been pretty good, overall. Here's hoping for more to come

    Erin The Red on
  • CromartyCromarty Danielle Registered User regular
    Heya new thread, it's me, Danielle.
    I ordered a whole bunch of clothes on Monday (and I'm already thinking about more), but thus far only one item has arrived.
    It's a good one though
    2opzt6zfxaf7.jpg

  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    Hiiii you're all lovely queerdos and I'm glad this thread is here

    Also my life is hilarious, I've met Adam K a couple of times in passing and had no idea they were D&D famous

  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    Cromarty wrote: »
    Heya new thread, it's me, Danielle.
    I ordered a whole bunch of clothes on Monday (and I'm already thinking about more), but thus far only one item has arrived.
    It's a good one though
    2opzt6zfxaf7.jpg

    That's a good look! Looks like you're about to drop some serious business on someone.
    Usagi wrote: »
    Hiiii you're all lovely queerdos and I'm glad this thread is here

    Also my life is hilarious, I've met Adam K a couple of times in passing and had no idea they were D&D famous

    Adam has the best hair. Is it as lovely in person?

  • mysticjuicermysticjuicer [he/him] I'm a muscle wizard and I cast P U N C HRegistered User regular
    Just had two successful Slay the Spire runs with the Silence, one after the other!

    oh, yeah, also I'm bi/pan and this twitter meme will tell you everything you need to know about me and what I'm about

    narwhal wrote:
    Why am I Terran?
    My YouTube Channel! Featuring silly little Guilty Gear Strive videos and other stuff!
  • ScooterScooter Registered User regular
    credeiki wrote:
    hm my fate/planescape game has us talking to an NPC that the GM starts out by referring to with they pronouns (tiefling Sensate with rubenesque figure but also a goatee), and then the GM can't remember and switches to she like 50% of the time

    I cannot handle how even all my progressive friends somehow cannot actually figure out how to use they pronouns and so obviously categorize as one or the other even fictional people they created who are clearly meant to be androgynous, let alone real people e.g. me

    bleh

    In my scifi smut game, I've created a hermaphroditic alien race that goes by they pronouns, and both I and my bonus features writer have had trouble with letting shes and hers slip in when writing scenes for them. I guess because in their (clothed) visuals, breasts are apparent but dongs aren't? And when you're putting down the story, there isn't really a part of the brain that's wired to see she/he pronouns as being bad in this particular case, so you don't even notice you did it.

    At least with writing I can catch it in editing, but if it was some sort of in-person live thing I imagine it would take a lot of practice to subconsciously see 'they' as a pronoun in and of itself and not just something to use for variety's sake.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    urghghghgh I'm dieting and hungry and this sucks

    Miss me? Find me on:

    Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
    Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    urghghghgh I'm dieting and hungry and this sucks

    :( I'm sorry doob! Hungry sucks a lot, especially because a lot of snacky healthy food is not exactly filling?
    You've got this. You're a strong independent woman who doesn't need a burg for nothin!

  • credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    edited February 2018
    Scooter wrote: »
    credeiki wrote:
    hm my fate/planescape game has us talking to an NPC that the GM starts out by referring to with they pronouns (tiefling Sensate with rubenesque figure but also a goatee), and then the GM can't remember and switches to she like 50% of the time

    I cannot handle how even all my progressive friends somehow cannot actually figure out how to use they pronouns and so obviously categorize as one or the other even fictional people they created who are clearly meant to be androgynous, let alone real people e.g. me

    bleh

    In my scifi smut game, I've created a hermaphroditic alien race that goes by they pronouns, and both I and my bonus features writer have had trouble with letting shes and hers slip in when writing scenes for them. I guess because in their (clothed) visuals, breasts are apparent but dongs aren't? And when you're putting down the story, there isn't really a part of the brain that's wired to see she/he pronouns as being bad in this particular case, so you don't even notice you did it.

    At least with writing I can catch it in editing, but if it was some sort of in-person live thing I imagine it would take a lot of practice to subconsciously see 'they' as a pronoun in and of itself and not just something to use for variety's sake.

    yeah I get that it's difficult

    I had to do writing where I deliberately made a character who uses they pronouns in order to get used to the whole concept. But actually I have not fucked it up at all. Not saying people are being malicious or anything, but I believe it's possible to make the effort and be really quite accurate.

    I'd think that since these friends are close with at least two people I can think of who use they pronouns, they'd have internalized at this point that it's a legit choice. Whatever. It makes me angry but it does not matter. At least it's not like my other game where everyone uses the wrong pronouns for me. The people from my first game haven't referred to me ever so idk if they do.

    credeiki on
    Steam, LoL: credeiki
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    Hi new thread. Since last new thread I have accepted I'm trans, come out to my best friend, and made the decision to quit my job and move 6,000km back home to a country I left 3 years ago and probably won't recognise, mainly so I can try to start transitioning. Because I guess I really want 2018 to be the most stressful year of my life.

  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    urghghghgh I'm dieting and hungry and this sucks

    :( I'm sorry doob! Hungry sucks a lot, especially because a lot of snacky healthy food is not exactly filling?
    You've got this. You're a strong independent woman who doesn't need a burg for nothin!

    if I had the right food it wouldn't be as bad

    like, veggies are lower in calories and can be quite filling

    but doing normal human things like cooking on a regular basis is extremely difficult for me

    so now I get to complain

    Miss me? Find me on:

    Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
    Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    Dubh wrote: »
    Dubh wrote: »
    urghghghgh I'm dieting and hungry and this sucks

    :( I'm sorry doob! Hungry sucks a lot, especially because a lot of snacky healthy food is not exactly filling?
    You've got this. You're a strong independent woman who doesn't need a burg for nothin!

    if I had the right food it wouldn't be as bad

    like, veggies are lower in calories and can be quite filling

    but doing normal human things like cooking on a regular basis is extremely difficult for me

    so now I get to complain

    Nah I get that. It's a lot of time and effort and then cleanup after.

    Hopefully things work out better next time!

    I forgot to eat dinner and I'm too lazy to get up and eat now

  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    Hi new thread. Since last new thread I have accepted I'm trans, come out to my best friend, and made the decision to quit my job and move 6,000km back home to a country I left 3 years ago and probably won't recognise, mainly so I can try to start transitioning. Because I guess I really want 2018 to be the most stressful year of my life.

    Also, hey. This is gonna be a year of a lot of changes. And it may be stressful as hell, but that doesn't mean it can't also be the best year of your life at the same time. You're learning a BUNCH of stuff about yourself! And you're working towards following that stuff and seeing where it goes. That's a commendable thing that tons of people never do. Worrying about stuff means you care about it and there's nothing wrong with that.

    Best of luck. We're all rooting for you!

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    Thanks. I can't wait to not feel sick with anxiety 100% of the time!

    (Narrator's Voice: Little did smof know, that time would never come)

  • jaziekjaziek Bad at everything And mad about it.Registered User regular
    Todays the day I'm gonna come out to my sister.

    I'm so damn scared.

    Steam ||| SC2 - Jaziek.377 on EU & NA. ||| Twitch Stream
  • KayKay What we need... Is a little bit of PANIC.Registered User regular
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    ew9y0DD.png
    3DS FCode: 1993-7512-8991
  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    'The One and Only'

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Kay wrote: »
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    Supreme Overlord?

  • PoketpixiePoketpixie Siege Registered User regular
    edited February 2018
    Dark Lord of All

    Hey it works for Stormageddon.

    Poketpixie on
  • PoketpixiePoketpixie Siege Registered User regular
    jaziek wrote: »
    Todays the day I'm gonna come out to my sister.

    I'm so damn scared.

    Whatever happens we're rooting for you.
    /hugs

  • pimentopimento she/they/pim Registered User regular
    The.

    Can be emphasised with expletive of choice when the situation deems it appropriate.

  • -Tal-Tal Registered User regular
    Comrade

    PNk1Ml4.png
  • 21stCentury21stCentury Call me Pixel, or Pix for short! [They/Them]Registered User regular
    Howdy, they call me 21st cause i'm an Ace and a Ten.

    Also i'm increasingly uncomfortable with my body, feels like.

    This morning i was waking up and seeing my hairy arms and feeling uncomfortable about those.

    I'm not sure I like the direction i'm heading in. :\

  • EinzelEinzel Registered User regular
    I'm not sure which thread to put this in (Love? LGBT? Australia?) so I made an audible and picked here cause new thread.

    tumblr_p3xlg0NPh81rjbkdko1_1280.jpg

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    I have been having thoughts about my not-sexuality* lately.
    I have identified as asexual for a while now and am pretty comfortable with that. But I do feel some kind of attraction towards some people, and I always thought it was much stronger for guys and so described myself as basically hetero. Or... I guess now that doesnt work so well. Mostly androphilic? Fuck this is confusing.

    Anyway. Since The Big Revelation I've been wondering if what I feel for guys is not so much attraction but a kind of... envy? As in I look at guys and wish I could be like that rather than have that.

    Weirdly since I had that thought I think my actual feelings of attraction towards women have increased, or I've become more aware of them. And if I can separate out the 'envy' from actual attraction wrt dudes it feels kind of the same?

    I'm not sure if any of those words make sense, but essentially if I were asked on a platonic date by both Tom Hardy and Natalie Dormer I would have real difficulty choosing, but I would want to borrow something of Hardy's to wear for it.

    ...sometimes I worry about saying this kind of personal stuff in a public arena. But I know how much reading other people's experiences has helped me so I feel like if putting my mental diarrhoea out there might help someone else with something they're working through then I should do it

    *I dunno a concise term for "attraction to people but not wanting to bump uglies with them"

  • mori1972mori1972 FF14: Rhotfyr Thosinmharsyn (Y)UKRegistered User regular
    edited February 2018
    So its a new thread (already?! Bloody hell that went quick) - hi fellow queer folks. So (re-)introductions again, hi, hi, I'm Paul, 45 years old, British and a gay man, HIV+, into indie music and gaming (so much gaming). Very much single (came out of a messy, borderline toxic relationship of 10 years last year); kinda sitting somewhere on the grey ace spectrum (still figuring that one out).

    I had a look back at the last thread and realised it was only started in October of last year - for some reason, that thread felt like it covered a much longer time period than it in fact actually had. Huh, go figure!

    So, let's see, in the past few months I have: survived Christmas, gotten a pay rise at work (which is just as well, seeing as I'm paying off a car that I also had to acquire for said work) and had recent confirmation that the project I head up will definitely be continuing for at least another year, so that's good news. I took (for me) an insane number of selfies (some of which I even posted in the old thread and the holiday hangout) in an ongoing (and increasingly futile) attempt by me to actually try and feel better about the way I look, and even recorded some snippets of my voice so that folks could hear my accent/way I speak (I still blame credit you for that one Erin :smile:).

    I've been trying to be a lot more open generally about my HIV status; partly because it is a part of me and shapes a lot of the ways in which I interact (or don't) with people, but in recent months I've also become very aware that I'm of that generation that grew up during the height of the 'gay plague', and I've been seeing a lot of posts on various social media sites in recent months where its becoming apparent (along with so many other aspects of queer history, like trans erasure at Stonewall) that a lot of younger folks really aren't aware of that sort of thing. I dunno...its complicated, and still stuff I'm processing in my own head, over a decade after my own diagnosis. I'm also finding myself yo-yo'ing far too rapidly between wanting to be a bit more sociable with folks and wanting to slither under a rock and never interact with another human being again.

    Hmmm...well, this has ended up being a bit more of a downer post than I was initially aiming for (yay for good intentions!) so...um....er....oh, I know! One goal I have set myself this year is to try and save up as much money as possible so that I have a financial buffer if/when my current job/income ends, but more importantly, because I still intend to have enough money saved up where I can treat myself to a proper, 'getting on a plane' type vacation next year, and I still want that vacation to involve going to one of the PAX events (probably PAX South).

    So...(re) hi all o/

    EDIT: Because I'm not entirely sure what 'getting on a plan' would involve, but I think I'd rather fly to America.

    mori1972 on
    It's all saltwater these days:
    Ocean, tears and heartbreak soup
    Half alive in a whitecap foam
    Half in love with a white half moon
  • facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    edited February 2018
    I had my heart broken.

    On the plus side, I'm talking with some of my history friends about possibly reenacting an 18th century molly house: https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/regency-gay-bar-molly-houses?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=keywee&kwp_0=643930

    (Though we want to do it more inclusively.)

    facetious on
    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
  • UsagiUsagi Nah Registered User regular
    Kay wrote: »
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    Captain, Commander, The Honorable, Darth

    I'll occasionally use Mx but usually that means I have to sit and explain wtf that is, so ymmv

  • SkwigelfSkwigelf Passed out in a cloud of farts and cigarette smoke.Registered User regular
    edited February 2018
    Usagi wrote: »
    Kay wrote: »
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    Captain, Commander, The Honorable, Darth

    I'll occasionally use Mx but usually that means I have to sit and explain wtf that is, so ymmv

    They could probably still use Dr.

    I'm pretty sure Andre Young, Julius Erving, and John Cena don't have their PhD's. And Dr Pepper isn't a real person so they can't even GET a PhD!

    Skwigelf on
  • credeikicredeiki Registered User regular
    Kay wrote: »
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    As far as I can tell people use Mx. pronounced 'mix'. Can you actually make this stick in everyday life? I mean, probably not--I'm Dr. and people mostly call me Ms. anyway because there isn't always a place to fill out your preferred title before interacting with someone. But it might be worth a try.
    Also grad school blows; don't do it!

    Steam, LoL: credeiki
  • Erin The RedErin The Red The Name's Erin! Woman, Podcaster, Dungeon Master, IT nerd, Parent, Trans. AMA Baton Rouge, LARegistered User regular
    edited February 2018
    Christine and I are dropping the kids off to my parents for the Mardi Gras break. Headed to see that good good Grinding Nemo movie and get some tasty foods.

    I love this lady. Spending time with her is very good. Now we both can get dressed up and have a hot lady date

    Erin The Red on
  • DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    Usagi wrote: »
    Kay wrote: »
    What's a good gender neutral title that I can default to?

    I keep thinking about going for a PhD as being a 'Dr' would solve everything, buuuuuut I'd probably need to move and I'm quite content where I am. (Which is working in academia anyhow but hey.)

    Captain, Commander, The Honorable, Darth

    I'll occasionally use Mx but usually that means I have to sit and explain wtf that is, so ymmv

    Imperator

    Miss me? Find me on:

    Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
    Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Okay so I'm absolutely 100% positive that my cat lumps are starting to come in. Veeerrrry exciting!

    I've been trying to sync up my online presence to match my new identity which is kinda tough when I had everything distributed to avoid identity prior, but it's coming together well. Feels weird to be on social media, yknow, socially.

  • AnzekayAnzekay Registered User regular
    Einzel wrote: »
    I'm not sure which thread to put this in (Love? LGBT? Australia?) so I made an audible and picked here cause new thread.

    tumblr_p3xlg0NPh81rjbkdko1_1280.jpg

    well this is awkward

    my brother wrote that article

  • The BetgirlThe Betgirl I'm Molly! Registered User regular
    Rainfall wrote: »
    Okay so I'm absolutely 100% positive that my cat lumps are starting to come in. Veeerrrry exciting!

    I've been trying to sync up my online presence to match my new identity which is kinda tough when I had everything distributed to avoid identity prior, but it's coming together well. Feels weird to be on social media, yknow, socially.

    transitioning made me so much more social its unreal

    Steam PSN: YerFriendMolly
    ineedmayo.com Eidolon Journal Updated
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    Rainfall wrote: »
    Okay so I'm absolutely 100% positive that my cat lumps are starting to come in. Veeerrrry exciting!

    I've been trying to sync up my online presence to match my new identity which is kinda tough when I had everything distributed to avoid identity prior, but it's coming together well. Feels weird to be on social media, yknow, socially.

    transitioning made me so much more social its unreal

    Yeppppp. Being comfortable with myself and not feeling like I'm always lying is a completely new experience

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    edited February 2018
    I started a new Facebook account today with my chosen name, so I can join certain groups without friends seeing. Made a new email in order to start the new Facebook. So I feel like a double agent now.

    Brovid Hasselsmof on
  • ceresceres When the last moon is cast over the last star of morning And the future has past without even a last desperate warningRegistered User, Moderator mod
    My diet of choice is 100% laziness combined with not keeping food next to my desk. Which I'm doing right now because our kitchen storage is basically a cabinet.

    Also I apparently can't have gluten, but this cake...

    And it seems like all is dying, and would leave the world to mourn
This discussion has been closed.