The Emperor should have fully explained to Magnus and Lorgar what was up.
That would have solved most of the issues.
This. Right here. Heresy dies because Horus cant get mass troops and the Thousand Sons don't get decimated. Magus descends to the planet and just exterminated all the traitors with psyker fire.
"Oi Magnus, here's the deal with the warp (you call it the great ocean). Don't fuck about with the lifeforms in the warp, they cannot be trusted.
Also, I got plans for you involving you sitting on a big chair and psychically running our new interstellar webway. You can still astral project everywhere and let's be honest. You prefer that anyway. No sorcery, you have all the power you already need".
"Lorgar, come here. You need to understand what you're worshipping. Seriously, I have a plan and its now time to explain. You'll understand why the Imperial Truth is best."
Angron...fuck I dunno. Those fuckwits cut out part of his brain and replaced it with cybernetics. He's fundamentally compromised and even the Emperor can't fix it.
Morty could be sorted out maybe? Same with Perty, Fulgrim and most of the other traitor primarchs.
Kondrad you just mind wipe. There's no fixing that, hit the reboot button.
Fulgrim was alright, his Legion were man for man the best fighters in the Crusade and he was a genius tactician and strategist himself. Chemos was one of the few traitor homeworlds that was a great place to live, like Ultramar or whatever.
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WearingglassesOf the friendly neighborhood varietyRegistered Userregular
What's the power rankings on tactics/strategy for the primarchs? I just keep reading the same "One of the most brilliant minds"/"best strategist in the Imperium" description in most of them.
Wasn't Fulgrim also more possessed and partially replaced by a deamon than actually fall to Chaos in the beginning? Also He and Lorgar just kept bad company. Lorgar especially was Grimma Wormtongued.
It has just occurred to me that the Eldars' great plans are effectively internet slacktivism.
"If enough people like this post we'll stop an african warlord! #KONY2012"
"If enough Eldar die and are kept in soulstones we'll awaken the god of the dead! #NeedYnnead"
"If enough Eldar cry for the Maiden Worlds we'll free Isha from the clutches of Nurgle! #FreeIsha"
What's the power rankings on tactics/strategy for the primarchs? I just keep reading the same "One of the most brilliant minds"/"best strategist in the Imperium" description in most of them.
It all depends on what you think is important.
Compared to today's standards/morals, Roboute would be the best primarch. Yeah he'd take over your planet, but then he'd institute grassroots reconstruction of the entire world. We're talking full functioning infrastructure and government. He'd even get healthcare and education sorted.
In terms of combat skill
Sanguinius
Lion El Johnson
Russ
In terms of battle/campaign strategy
Dorn
Perty
Roboute
The rest kind of fall somewhere in the middle. No one was bad except (IMO) Lorgar because he kept building churches after he took a world into compliance. There's nothing wrong with spending time building, Roboute would rebuild a world's infrastructure, Dorn would rebuild the defence estate of a world.
There were a number of Primarchs where you wouldn't really be able to separate them in terms of personal skill. Horus, Russ, The Lion, Fulgrim, Sanguinius, the Khan, they all were just shit hot. All of them beat another Primarch too I think? Actually I think only Russ, Fulgrim, Dorn and Horus actually iced other Primarchs, but Dorn wasn't the best fighters or even near it tbh. For a Primarch anyway.
Shit Fulgrim took out two, Ferrus and Gulliman. That's serious pedigree.
How was Vulkan like during the Great Crusade? I know he later got serius PTSD after being killed so many times by Curze and that the Salamanders are probably the most human Marines now - they actually live among the people of their home planet - but how did he treat worlds that the Slamanders "liberated"
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Metzger MeisterIt Gets Worsebefore it gets any better.Registered Userregular
My husband was almost crying laughing earlier just from me describing orky technology and culture. Like, doom divers and how Yarrick is da best humie and stuff
My husband was almost crying laughing earlier just from me describing orky technology and culture. Like, doom divers and how Yarrick is da best humie and stuff
Yeah, but all of the Primarchs pretty much agree that you can rate them on a scale of 1 to Sanguinius. Horus is going "Sanguinius would be much better at this than me" all the time.
"The western world sips from a poisonous cocktail: Polarisation, populism, protectionism and post-truth"
-Antje Jackelén, Archbishop of the Church of Sweden
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Metzger MeisterIt Gets Worsebefore it gets any better.Registered Userregular
My husband was almost crying laughing earlier just from me describing orky technology and culture. Like, doom divers and how Yarrick is da best humie and stuff
he loved this, especially cuz orks were trying to do us a favor by making our hair cooler
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Presumably he could also have put up some wards to prevent the Primarchs from getting stolen by Chaos and distributed to a variety of hellish death worlds.
Assuming, of course, that them getting warp jacked wasn't all part of the plan in the first place.
I mean, even if you take the cold and emotionless approach that the Emperor intended the Primarchs and Space Marines to do their job and then burn up, he still mishandled them.
Tools need to be taken care of. You don't go "Eh, I'm not going to oil up that drill press and it doesn't matter that this saw is rusty, they're just tools". Even if you only intend to use the tools for a very short time and then don't care what happens to them (rust and all), you still want them to be in working order while they're in use. The Emperor needed to either take care of his tools (and hey, the primarchs were certainly tools in at least one definition heyoooooooo), or dispose of them properly.
Unless, of course, tearing up physical space, making half of your juiced up tool-men fight the other half, making the now demon-juiced tool-men tear down parts of the Imperium that you just put together, and causing untold numbers of innocent lives be ground up in the process is all part of the plan. In which case, the Emperor did good, I guess.
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Presumably he could also have put up some wards to prevent the Primarchs from getting stolen by Chaos and distributed to a variety of hellish death worlds.
Assuming, of course, that them getting warp jacked wasn't all part of the plan in the first place.
I can see some sense in having your demigod super-soldiers be raised in different parts of the empire, to learn the local customs and different ways to approach war. That way, they can specialize (infrastructure-building, defense-making, beer-drinking, nu-metal-listening, etc), exhibit flexibility, and cover each other's weak spots. Assuming they're not emotionally stunted man-babies who can't work together.
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PiptheFairFrequently not in boats.Registered Userregular
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Nah fuck em
They were tools, they existed for a purpose
Except Rowboat who is as good at his job as Malcador was
I think my favourite HH fact is it wasn't even originally planned by GW.
When original flavour titanicus came out they needed a reason why imperial titans were fighting each other cause they didn't want to spend the time making xeno ones.
"Uhhh... Imperial civil war? Yeah man some dude named Horus rebellled."
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Nah fuck em
They were tools, they existed for a purpose
Except Rowboat who is as good at his job as Malcador was
From a completely unbiased assessment, rowboat is the best primarch.
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Nah fuck em
They were tools, they existed for a purpose
Except Rowboat who is as good at his job as Malcador was
Rowboat is let's be honest the most effective Primarch. He was the one that realised the most useful thing for a Legion to do was to be fucking massive and hugely well organised. He was the civilisation builder, he was the guy that left behind him actual productive, safe, prosperous worlds. He was the one that during the Heresy Horus was most afraid of because him and his Legion could fight, like, three other Legions at once and win (numbers + extremely good tactical and strategic training/experience + logistics + discipline = you lose, you gang of nutters). After the Heresy he was the one that actually took responsibility, reorganised, rebuilt, put safeguards in place etc.
If you could pick one Primarch to come back on the Imperial side you'd be a fool if you didn't pick Gulliman. He's the ultimate force multiplier. Maybe you'd want Sanguinius because he's more inspiring but shit, Gulliman is inspiring! People follow him! You're right he is like Malcador, he knew he had a job to do and he did it to the absolute best of his ability. Not a nutter, not out for personal glory, not even really out for the Emperor because he knows that the Emperor's idea is even bigger than the Emperor is. Like, Imperium Secundus? The Emperor would have 100% approved of that. He'd have been like "good idea, well done for not getting sentimental." He's the complete package really. Nobody likes him because Ultramarines but he is.
I feel like the Horus Heresy could have been averted, and most of the primarchs could have been brought back from the edge, if their inhuman space god-dad had one single genuine conversation with them, and gave them one single hug.
Posts
This says more of 80's metal than iron maiden
This is what I hear when I see the icons of Khrone I just posted
Also, I got plans for you involving you sitting on a big chair and psychically running our new interstellar webway. You can still astral project everywhere and let's be honest. You prefer that anyway. No sorcery, you have all the power you already need".
"Lorgar, come here. You need to understand what you're worshipping. Seriously, I have a plan and its now time to explain. You'll understand why the Imperial Truth is best."
Angron...fuck I dunno. Those fuckwits cut out part of his brain and replaced it with cybernetics. He's fundamentally compromised and even the Emperor can't fix it.
Morty could be sorted out maybe? Same with Perty, Fulgrim and most of the other traitor primarchs.
Kondrad you just mind wipe. There's no fixing that, hit the reboot button.
"If enough people like this post we'll stop an african warlord! #KONY2012"
"If enough Eldar die and are kept in soulstones we'll awaken the god of the dead! #NeedYnnead"
"If enough Eldar cry for the Maiden Worlds we'll free Isha from the clutches of Nurgle! #FreeIsha"
It all depends on what you think is important.
Compared to today's standards/morals, Roboute would be the best primarch. Yeah he'd take over your planet, but then he'd institute grassroots reconstruction of the entire world. We're talking full functioning infrastructure and government. He'd even get healthcare and education sorted.
In terms of combat skill
Lion El Johnson
Russ
In terms of battle/campaign strategy
The rest kind of fall somewhere in the middle. No one was bad except (IMO) Lorgar because he kept building churches after he took a world into compliance. There's nothing wrong with spending time building, Roboute would rebuild a world's infrastructure, Dorn would rebuild the defence estate of a world.
Lorgar built churches. Useless fuck
Shit Fulgrim took out two, Ferrus and Gulliman. That's serious pedigree.
I thought the rumors were he is basically a sentient shadow now.
....
"Caw, caw...
motherfuckers?"
NEVERMORE
SO EDGY
SO GRIM
-Antje Jackelén, Archbishop of the Church of Sweden
he loved this, especially cuz orks were trying to do us a favor by making our hair cooler
Something stupid and heroic?
Like trying to take on Horus despite being wounded and tired from weeks of fighting, and his opponent being empowered by the entire Chaos pantheon.
Get his windpipe crushed.
That's so raven?
Turns out it wasn't "Choke me harder, daddy".
Long story short, there goes my fanfic.
Is there an "your words are such a dad joke it hurts button"
Nah fuck em
They were tools, they existed for a purpose
Presumably he could also have put up some wards to prevent the Primarchs from getting stolen by Chaos and distributed to a variety of hellish death worlds.
Assuming, of course, that them getting warp jacked wasn't all part of the plan in the first place.
Tools need to be taken care of. You don't go "Eh, I'm not going to oil up that drill press and it doesn't matter that this saw is rusty, they're just tools". Even if you only intend to use the tools for a very short time and then don't care what happens to them (rust and all), you still want them to be in working order while they're in use. The Emperor needed to either take care of his tools (and hey, the primarchs were certainly tools in at least one definition heyoooooooo), or dispose of them properly.
Unless, of course, tearing up physical space, making half of your juiced up tool-men fight the other half, making the now demon-juiced tool-men tear down parts of the Imperium that you just put together, and causing untold numbers of innocent lives be ground up in the process is all part of the plan. In which case, the Emperor did good, I guess.
Except Rowboat who is as good at his job as Malcador was
When original flavour titanicus came out they needed a reason why imperial titans were fighting each other cause they didn't want to spend the time making xeno ones.
"Uhhh... Imperial civil war? Yeah man some dude named Horus rebellled."
From a completely unbiased assessment, rowboat is the best primarch.
And that's why he's so fucking boring
Rowboat is let's be honest the most effective Primarch. He was the one that realised the most useful thing for a Legion to do was to be fucking massive and hugely well organised. He was the civilisation builder, he was the guy that left behind him actual productive, safe, prosperous worlds. He was the one that during the Heresy Horus was most afraid of because him and his Legion could fight, like, three other Legions at once and win (numbers + extremely good tactical and strategic training/experience + logistics + discipline = you lose, you gang of nutters). After the Heresy he was the one that actually took responsibility, reorganised, rebuilt, put safeguards in place etc.
If you could pick one Primarch to come back on the Imperial side you'd be a fool if you didn't pick Gulliman. He's the ultimate force multiplier. Maybe you'd want Sanguinius because he's more inspiring but shit, Gulliman is inspiring! People follow him! You're right he is like Malcador, he knew he had a job to do and he did it to the absolute best of his ability. Not a nutter, not out for personal glory, not even really out for the Emperor because he knows that the Emperor's idea is even bigger than the Emperor is. Like, Imperium Secundus? The Emperor would have 100% approved of that. He'd have been like "good idea, well done for not getting sentimental." He's the complete package really. Nobody likes him because Ultramarines but he is.
He didn't look after his tools and they broke