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The Even Worse Joke Thread

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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Go directly to jail, do not pass "GO", do not collect $200.

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    El SkidEl Skid The frozen white northRegistered User regular
    A weasel walks into the bar.

    The bartender turns to the weasel and says “Wow, I never served a weasel before! What’ll you have?”

    “Pop”, goes the weasel.

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    darunia106darunia106 J-bob in games Death MountainRegistered User regular
    So my dad got fitted for a new suit for my sister's wedding. And he happened to get it on his birthday.

    So he's been telling everyone he can that he's going to his daughter's wedding in his birthday suit.

    pHWHd2G.jpg
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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    DhPz9Rx.png

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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    IDNNBP2.jpg

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    joshofalltradesjoshofalltrades Class Traitor Smoke-filled roomRegistered User regular
    Booooo

    ...

    BOOOOO!

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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Shut up, it’s perfect.

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    AtheraalAtheraal Registered User regular
    what kind of dog did Han Solo have as a child?
    A chewiehua

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    RingoRingo He/Him a distinct lack of substanceRegistered User regular
    Atheraal wrote: »
    what kind of dog did Han Solo have as a child?
    A chewiehua

    https://youtu.be/GoAPSBMQEKU

    Sterica wrote: »
    I know my last visit to my grandpa on his deathbed was to find out how the whole Nazi werewolf thing turned out.
    Edcrab's Exigency RPG
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    TallahasseerielTallahasseeriel Registered User regular
    Atheraal wrote: »
    what kind of dog did Han Solo have as a child?
    A chewiehua

    No

    It was a husky named after a state.

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    GrisloGrislo Registered User regular
    Massachewsetts?

    Eh, North Chewbacca?

    This post was sponsored by Tom Cruise.
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    MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    Uriel wrote: »
    Atheraal wrote: »
    what kind of dog did Han Solo have as a child?
    A chewiehua

    No

    It was a husky named after a state.

    Indiana.

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    PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    MichaelLC wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    Atheraal wrote: »
    what kind of dog did Han Solo have as a child?
    A chewiehua

    No

    It was a husky named after a state.

    Indiana.

    Yeah, but that falls into the issue of jokes aren't funny if you have to explain them

    Steam: Polaritie
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    Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver You don't have to attend every argument you are invited to. Philosophy: Stoicism. Politics: Democratic SocialistRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    We named the dog Han.

    Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but dies in the process.
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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    I think the joke works better with an extra "hua" at the end.

    As it is, it sounds like "choo-WEE-wah". I think making it chewie-wah-wah scans better, even with the extra syllable.

    vRyue2p.png
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    TonkkaTonkka Some one in the club tonight Has stolen my ideas.Registered User regular
    What's the difference between roast potatoes and pea soup?
    Anyone can roast potatoes.

    Steam: evilumpire Battle.net: T0NKKA#1588 PS4: T_0_N_N_K_A Twitter Art blog/Portfolio! Twitch?! HEY SATAN Shirts and such
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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    aa3sfce.jpg

    vRyue2p.png
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    ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    too soon?


    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    you know, i feel like since no one died, and the rose windows and like almost all the art and the altar and stuff largely survived...

    i'm gonna say it's totally cool to fuckin dunk on notre dame like this was an NCAA tournament, babeeyyyyyyyy let's get that old church!

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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    They still don’t know for sure what caused the fire

    Although one guy who works there has a hunch

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    Rhesus Positive wrote: »
    They still don’t know for sure what caused the fire

    Although one guy who works there has a hunch

    When asked if he'd seen anyone unusual, he was heard to say "that does ring a bell, yes."

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    Mild ConfusionMild Confusion Smash All Things Registered User regular
    edited April 2019
    One of the less savory tasks the Hunchback has to do is empty the chamber pots. The thing is, he kept missing where to dump them and just made more of a mess for himself.

    He had no-turd-aim.

    Mild Confusion on
    steam_sig.png

    Battlenet ID: MildC#11186 - If I'm in the game, send me an invite at anytime and I'll play.
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    Hi I'm Vee!Hi I'm Vee! Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C E Registered User regular
    byFQx4al.jpg

    vRyue2p.png
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    Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive GNU Terry Pratchett Registered User regular
    Traditionally, the 4th wedding anniversary is flowers

    This is what Mrs Rhesus got me for ours:
    nsztmfic9bmt.jpg

    [Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]
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    knitdanknitdan In ur base Killin ur guysRegistered User regular
    Oh no you married your soulmate how terrible

    “I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
    -Indiana Solo, runner of blades
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    KaplarKaplar On Google MapsRegistered User regular
    What do you call a chicken staring at a bowl of lettuce?
    A chicken sees a salad.

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    JayKaosJayKaos Registered User regular
    Stolen from inside an easter egg last night-
    What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

    Steam | SW-0844-0908-6004 and my Switch code
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    JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    edited May 2019
    Rhesus Positive wrote: »
    They still don’t know for sure what caused the fire

    Although one guy who works there has a hunch

    I would like you to know that I just texted this joke to somebody at 1 AM because I forgot they were currently in Scotland.

    Thanks, Bad Joke Thread.

    Jedoc on
    GDdCWMm.jpg
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    JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    edited May 2019
    Never mind. She just texted back asking "O rly? What's that hunch?"

    Everything is forgiven, Bad Joke Thread. That was perfect.

    Jedoc on
    GDdCWMm.jpg
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    AngelHedgieAngelHedgie Registered User regular

    XBL: Nox Aeternum / PSN: NoxAeternum / NN:NoxAeternum / Steam: noxaeternum
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    Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Jedoc wrote: »
    Never mind. She just texted back asking "O rly? What's that hunch?"

    Everything is forgiven, Bad Joke Thread. That was perfect.

    You could tell her, but it probably wouldn't ring any bells...

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    see317see317 Registered User regular
    chrishallett83 wrote: »
    Jedoc wrote: »
    Never mind. She just texted back asking "O rly? What's that hunch?"

    Everything is forgiven, Bad Joke Thread. That was perfect.

    You could tell her, but it probably wouldn't ring any bells...

    He's a dead ringer for that guy they used to have.

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    El SkidEl Skid The frozen white northRegistered User regular
    see317 wrote: »
    chrishallett83 wrote: »
    Jedoc wrote: »
    Never mind. She just texted back asking "O rly? What's that hunch?"

    Everything is forgiven, Bad Joke Thread. That was perfect.

    You could tell her, but it probably wouldn't ring any bells...

    He's a dead ringer for that guy they used to have.

    I dunno,,,he only sort of looked like the other guy. He was a quasi-dead ringer.

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    MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    El Skid wrote: »
    see317 wrote: »
    chrishallett83 wrote: »
    Jedoc wrote: »
    Never mind. She just texted back asking "O rly? What's that hunch?"

    Everything is forgiven, Bad Joke Thread. That was perfect.

    You could tell her, but it probably wouldn't ring any bells...

    He's a dead ringer for that guy they used to have.

    I dunno,,,he only sort of looked like the other guy. He was a quasi-dead ringer.

    Yeah, he was an actor in a bunch of commercials and the spokesman for Orange Communications in those HELLO MODO ads.

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    The GeekThe Geek Oh-Two Crew, Omeganaut Registered User, ClubPA regular
    People who are into that new alkaline fad diet are so basic.

    BLM - ACAB
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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    Why was one fifth so stressed out?

    He was two tenths!

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    AtheraalAtheraal Registered User regular
    Many people don't know, the Titanic was carrying a massive shipment of mayonnaise to its next port in Mexico. Well, we all know what happened.. The Mexican people went without that shipment, and mourned it with a national holiday. Sinko de Mayo

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    facetiousfacetious a wit so dry it shits sandRegistered User regular
    Why were Mark and Shania born in different centuries?
    Because never the Twain shall meet.

    "I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
    Robert Khoo wrote: »
    Real strong, facetious.

    Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
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    BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    No else has ever been named Twain :rotate:

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    PolaritiePolaritie Sleepy Registered User regular
    Bedlam wrote: »
    No else has ever been named Twain :rotate:

    Mark Twain was just a pen name anyways

    Steam: Polaritie
    3DS: 0473-8507-2652
    Switch: SW-5185-4991-5118
    PSN: AbEntropy
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