finally dumped the 'announcement' of getting my name changed (soon!) onto facebook and promptly got like a dozen private messages of support from all sorts of people
particularly from my cousin, who noted that she hopes my mother takes it well. Of course, my cousin also changed her name a while back and everything went fairly okay for her so she's super happy for this. the overwhelming response has been comments on how good the name Morgan is.
I had a fun discussion relating to it with my psychologist the other week, as well. The very first thing he did when I told him was change my 'preferred name' in his notes and database system, and then we had the following exchange
"So, do you want to tell me the reason for the change or shall I take a guess?"
"Oh I do love it when you take guesses, go ahead."
"Well it's a less masculine name... I wouldn't say inherently feminine, but the agender nature of the name lends itself to a more androgynous feel..."
to which I responded by gaping because he managed to cut right through most of my ancillary reasons to the kinda core one... it just feels... right for my frame of mind and self-identity wrt: gender stuff. I shouldn't have been surprised really, given that he's typically extremely perceptive. He did find it fascinating that 'Morgan' was originally what my Dad wanted to call me, but it got relegated to be my middle name for reasons neither of my parents can remember. In some ways, my psych said, it's like my Dad innately knew that his second child was really a Morgan, not a Benjamin, and I am just reorienting my outward identity to better fit with who I am- who I've become. Thanks Dad, for picking out an excellent name and leaving it sitting quietly as my middle name all these years.
Anyway, at some point in the ever growing closer future I'll feel comfortable calling myself a masc-leaning enby, but for now I'll settle for getting used to being called Morgan (and doing so in my self-referential talk lol)
next on the ticket is seeing my long-term GP about some proper anti-depressants, investigating whether or not I inherited my Dad's ADHD, and seeing what it'd take to get a low-dosage prescription of something light like spiro.
and I just spent half an hour arguing with my brother that his opinion that by getting my ears pierced I am 'limiting my potential dating pool of women' is not supported by any empirical data and sounds like a bunch of bullshit
I swear my brother is the most paradoxical entity I have ever encountered. Extremely supportive of my bisexuality, fought on my behalf with my parents constantly about it... and then has some big song and dance over getting a few piercings in my ear.
I awesomed that because it's so fricking ridiculous that I kind of had no other reaction.
"You know what I'm really looking for in a partner? Somebody who disapproves of my personal aesthetic preferences."
his response to me saying something along those lines was that it is not a very realistic outlook and very shortsighted
but I suspect his real conflict here is just that he's really wound up with gender binary bullshit to realise that his straight ass is the one with myopia
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Donovan PuppyfuckerA dagger in the dark isworth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered Userregular
the guy who did the piercing marked out the ideal spots for the other 4 as well, so I'll just get them done one or two at a time after this one has healed sufficiently
kinda tempted by one of the ones they do in the inner cartilage area as well but that'll be an Optional Boss after I've beaten the main 5
Was honestly really impressed with the place; every piercing place I've been inside of before seemed kinda sketchy and seedy. This one was bright, cheery, very professional but the walls were plastered with weird and wonderful art and figurines. Really helped with the low-key anxiety.
I also told the guy I am hemophobic, since I kinda always do that whenever anyone is doing something even slightly medical to me, lol. Which he responded to by referring to blood as 'glitter' the entire time which was hilarious
That response by the piercer is so fucking charming
Also multiple piercings all one one side look so cool; it will be great
Are you US-based? If so, you should go to Claire's and investigate the excellent selection of cheap small matching earrings meant to be all worn together in a way that looks great. If not, find the Claire's equivalent and start stocking up! Very exciting! Piercings are so fun. I love my industrial and gave up taking it out for reasons of professionalism at work so now I just sometimes have a suit and a bar through my ear when I meet clients and they have to deal with that.
Man this thread is making me want to reopen a couple of the closed holes underneath that in my earlobe but I think my presentation is too tenuous for that; tragic.
two and a half hours later and I have finally worked out why my brother is such a shit sometimes
he basically can't get away from my parents, especially my mother, talking to him about me constantly. Basically every phone call with my mum devolves into a fight about my being bi
I kinda had a go at him for making it sound like he was trying to make it all about him, but it does genuinely sound like he's been having a real shit time of it for a while now in regards to my mum. I am sympathetic, but I wish he'd stop sticking his nose in my business about other comparatively mundane things, and quit trying to tell me how to live my life and then getting defensive and saying I am 'too far gone' or 'so absolutist' when I express just how much I disagree
god damn family is frustratingly complicated. I already have the breakup to deal with and need to focus on studies and work! Now is not the time for more crap about this well-trodden ground.
I awesomed that because it's so fricking ridiculous that I kind of had no other reaction.
"You know what I'm really looking for in a partner? Somebody who disapproves of my personal aesthetic preferences."
his response to me saying something along those lines was that it is not a very realistic outlook and very shortsighted
but I suspect his real conflict here is just that he's really wound up with gender binary bullshit to realise that his straight ass is the one with myopia
That statement definitely belies someone who long ago decided they would have to hide parts of themself If they ever wanted to find companionship.
I awesomed that because it's so fricking ridiculous that I kind of had no other reaction.
"You know what I'm really looking for in a partner? Somebody who disapproves of my personal aesthetic preferences."
his response to me saying something along those lines was that it is not a very realistic outlook and very shortsighted
but I suspect his real conflict here is just that he's really wound up with gender binary bullshit to realise that his straight ass is the one with myopia
But Anz, how will you ever get someone to notice you unless you blend in with the crowd?
+7
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3cl1ps3I will build a labyrinth to house the cheeseRegistered Userregular
and I just spent half an hour arguing with my brother that his opinion that by getting my ears pierced I am 'limiting my potential dating pool of women' is not supported by any empirical data and sounds like a bunch of bullshit
I swear my brother is the most paradoxical entity I have ever encountered. Extremely supportive of my bisexuality, fought on my behalf with my parents constantly about it... and then has some big song and dance over getting a few piercings in my ear.
I've been kind of just staring at this post for awhile.
I had at one point five piercings (down to two now but that's more because my cartilage is dogshit than anything else), and I would say I pretty generally had reasonable dating success and am now very happily married. All to women.
Well I have been able to confirm that if I sleep on my side that doesn't have the pierced ear, I will literally just sleep like a rock and not wake up on the wrong side
Friends invited me to Easter dinner with their family, and while I have met their family several times it’ll be the first time since I came out. We’re talking boomer liberals here, so probably not overtly hostile but rather overly patronizing at worst.
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Hi I'm Vee!Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C ERegistered Userregular
Okay, this has been bothering me, and I feel embarrassed to ask because I feel like I should know already, but I can't stand it anymore so...
“Egg” is a term/meme for trans women before they realize they’re women. Basically, common behaviors that, retrospect, make it seem kind of obvious. Like always crossdressing for Halloween, being into stereotypically “girlie” things, or liking stuff with trans undertones like Ranma 1/2. Once they realize they’re trans they have “hatched” into their true selves. A person may say they “hatched an egg” ie help a trans woman come to terms with her gender shit.
So eggs, Easter, and obvious joke. Note that this is just a silly meme and not something you should take seriously. Especially if you thinking lacking typical “egg” behaviors mean you’re not trans after all. Don’t use memes to sort through your life.
(Note: I have never seen the meme come up in men’s circles. Sometimes for femme NB folks, but nothing for masc trans people. So it may not be an exclusively trans woman/femme thing. Just to be clear.)
Sterica on
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Hi I'm Vee!Formerly VH; She/Her; Is an E X P E R I E N C ERegistered Userregular
Oh, I've never heard of that before. Thanks!
+2
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21stCenturyCall me Pixel, or Pix for short![They/Them]Registered Userregular
“Egg” is a term/meme for trans women before they realize they’re women. Basically, common behaviors that, retrospect, make it seem kind of obvious. Like always crossdressing for Halloween, being into stereotypically “girlie” things, or liking stuff with trans undertones like Ranma 1/2. Once they realize they’re trans they have “hatched” into their true selves. A person may say they “hatched an egg” ie help a trans woman come to terms with her gender shit.
So eggs, Easter, and obvious joke. Note that this is just a silly meme and not something you should take seriously. Especially if you thinking lacking typical “egg” behaviors mean you’re not trans after all. Don’t use memes to sort through your life.
(Note: I have never seen the meme come up in men’s circles. Sometimes for femme NB folks, but nothing for masc trans people. So it may not be an exclusively trans woman/femme thing. Just to be clear.)
Friends invited me to Easter dinner with their family, and while I have met their family several times it’ll be the first time since I came out. We’re talking boomer liberals here, so probably not overtly hostile but rather overly patronizing at worst.
This went well! Everyone used the right name, and nobody even said a word about me being trans! Also, the kids were great and sweet and we helped the younger ones find easter eggs. It was a great time!
Blackhawk1313Demon Hunter for HireTime RiftRegistered Userregular
Just want to say real quick that you are all beautiful, wonderful people and that who you are and what you feel is completely valid, and that I will tear anyone who even tries to imply otherwise a new one. This I say with my full and utter conviction, though the positivity itself may have something to do with the fact I’m flying to today and my prescription has kicked in that prevents my extreme anxiety from immediately making me catatonic on a flight.
... my point stands however, I credit you all for making me a slightly less terrible human being and to actually think about my privileges and how I can leverage them for good.
Just want to say real quick that you are all beautiful, wonderful people and that who you are and what you feel is completely valid, and that I will tear anyone who even tries to imply otherwise a new one. This I say with my full and utter conviction, though the positivity itself may have something to do with the fact I’m flying to today and my prescription has kicked in that prevents my extreme anxiety from immediately making me catatonic on a flight.
... my point stands however, I credit you all for making me a slightly less terrible human being and to actually think about my privileges and how I can leverage them for good.
Hey. You're a solid-ass human being and if you've grown, it's because you came here with an open mind. And that's super important and much rarer than it should be these days.
Thank you for listening and for supporting us and for being there and for being a lovely person in general.
Edit: let me clarify that statement. It was harder getting interviews or people to talk to me as a woman. It was easier to Interview as a woman because I was much more confident and social.
I do not think I would have landed this job before transition. I would have been too nervous and self loathing to do as well on the team fit interview.
Seidkona on
Mostly just huntin' monsters.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
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mysticjuicer[he/him] I'm a muscle wizardand I cast P U N C HRegistered Userregular
Showed my ear stud to my Dad tonight. He was happy that I was happy with it, but didn't have much of an opinion otherwise. He had an earring when he was young, but he wasn't really sure how easily his thoughts on dudes with piercings back then compares to now, so didn't want to comment either way. That's something I can understand.
We talked more about my name change stuff, as when I first told him about it last month he was kinda confused and perplexed. After this he understands a lot more, and understands my reasoning! I think he quietly likes that I am letting the name he wanted to give me as a first name shine.
He is uh, not sure how my mum will take either of these developments. But ah well.
also one of my high school teachers I have on facebook messaged me to tell me that not only does she acknowledge my name change, but thinks I now have amazing pen name potential (she was one of english teachers)
Anzekay on
+33
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ShadowenSnores in the morningLoserdomRegistered Userregular
The Nevada, Washington State, and Oregon National Guards will continue to allow transgender people to serve.
As the Trump administration’s transgender troop ban enters its second full week of being in effect, these three states have told The Daily Beast that they will join two others—California and New Mexico—who have said that transgender people will continue to be able to serve in their National Guard organizations.
Posts
Of course, I don’t joke about that sort of thing.
particularly from my cousin, who noted that she hopes my mother takes it well. Of course, my cousin also changed her name a while back and everything went fairly okay for her so she's super happy for this. the overwhelming response has been comments on how good the name Morgan is.
I had a fun discussion relating to it with my psychologist the other week, as well. The very first thing he did when I told him was change my 'preferred name' in his notes and database system, and then we had the following exchange
"So, do you want to tell me the reason for the change or shall I take a guess?"
"Oh I do love it when you take guesses, go ahead."
"Well it's a less masculine name... I wouldn't say inherently feminine, but the agender nature of the name lends itself to a more androgynous feel..."
to which I responded by gaping because he managed to cut right through most of my ancillary reasons to the kinda core one... it just feels... right for my frame of mind and self-identity wrt: gender stuff. I shouldn't have been surprised really, given that he's typically extremely perceptive. He did find it fascinating that 'Morgan' was originally what my Dad wanted to call me, but it got relegated to be my middle name for reasons neither of my parents can remember. In some ways, my psych said, it's like my Dad innately knew that his second child was really a Morgan, not a Benjamin, and I am just reorienting my outward identity to better fit with who I am- who I've become. Thanks Dad, for picking out an excellent name and leaving it sitting quietly as my middle name all these years.
Anyway, at some point in the ever growing closer future I'll feel comfortable calling myself a masc-leaning enby, but for now I'll settle for getting used to being called Morgan (and doing so in my self-referential talk lol)
next on the ticket is seeing my long-term GP about some proper anti-depressants, investigating whether or not I inherited my Dad's ADHD, and seeing what it'd take to get a low-dosage prescription of something light like spiro.
I swear my brother is the most paradoxical entity I have ever encountered. Extremely supportive of my bisexuality, fought on my behalf with my parents constantly about it... and then has some big song and dance over getting a few piercings in my ear.
"You know what I'm really looking for in a partner? Somebody who disapproves of my personal aesthetic preferences."
his response to me saying something along those lines was that it is not a very realistic outlook and very shortsighted
but I suspect his real conflict here is just that he's really wound up with gender binary bullshit to realise that his straight ass is the one with myopia
I honestly wanted to punch him right in the dick.
(insert Oglaf)
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
people that tell you how to look and act (unless they are your parents who might be traditional or just worried)
are social parasites and will constantly use you to compliment themselves through broadcasting their ideology at your expense
I think my brother fits into the same category as parents, on this
just a bit traditional and weirdly worried because of it
Yeah. The imposition of your idea of "the right way" onto others is super narrow-minded and a crappy way to live
That response by the piercer is so fucking charming
Also multiple piercings all one one side look so cool; it will be great
Are you US-based? If so, you should go to Claire's and investigate the excellent selection of cheap small matching earrings meant to be all worn together in a way that looks great. If not, find the Claire's equivalent and start stocking up! Very exciting! Piercings are so fun. I love my industrial and gave up taking it out for reasons of professionalism at work so now I just sometimes have a suit and a bar through my ear when I meet clients and they have to deal with that.
Man this thread is making me want to reopen a couple of the closed holes underneath that in my earlobe but I think my presentation is too tenuous for that; tragic.
he basically can't get away from my parents, especially my mother, talking to him about me constantly. Basically every phone call with my mum devolves into a fight about my being bi
I kinda had a go at him for making it sound like he was trying to make it all about him, but it does genuinely sound like he's been having a real shit time of it for a while now in regards to my mum. I am sympathetic, but I wish he'd stop sticking his nose in my business about other comparatively mundane things, and quit trying to tell me how to live my life and then getting defensive and saying I am 'too far gone' or 'so absolutist' when I express just how much I disagree
god damn family is frustratingly complicated. I already have the breakup to deal with and need to focus on studies and work! Now is not the time for more crap about this well-trodden ground.
Now the low level anxiety is back and each passing minute I could eat another elephant. . .
Fuck.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
But Anz, how will you ever get someone to notice you unless you blend in with the crowd?
I've been kind of just staring at this post for awhile.
I had at one point five piercings (down to two now but that's more because my cartilage is dogshit than anything else), and I would say I pretty generally had reasonable dating success and am now very happily married. All to women.
Like.
What the hell was the assertion here.
Men with earrings are not a new thing.
...what is the obvious joke about eggs?
that this thread "poaches" the best people on the forum
So eggs, Easter, and obvious joke. Note that this is just a silly meme and not something you should take seriously. Especially if you thinking lacking typical “egg” behaviors mean you’re not trans after all. Don’t use memes to sort through your life.
(Note: I have never seen the meme come up in men’s circles. Sometimes for femme NB folks, but nothing for masc trans people. So it may not be an exclusively trans woman/femme thing. Just to be clear.)
I used egg for myself and i'm not a woman.
IDK. I like the term.
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
https://apnews.com/be82bc96f46e4eb7a6d5de807210b30f
The terror is real.
... my point stands however, I credit you all for making me a slightly less terrible human being and to actually think about my privileges and how I can leverage them for good.
Hey. You're a solid-ass human being and if you've grown, it's because you came here with an open mind. And that's super important and much rarer than it should be these days.
Thank you for listening and for supporting us and for being there and for being a lovely person in general.
It's amazing how much easier that was as myself.
Edit: let me clarify that statement. It was harder getting interviews or people to talk to me as a woman. It was easier to Interview as a woman because I was much more confident and social.
I do not think I would have landed this job before transition. I would have been too nervous and self loathing to do as well on the team fit interview.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
Check out my site, the Bismuth Heart | My Twitter
Lots of nice stuff including Pride leggings
https://shop.bombsheller.com/products/transpride
20% off right now but yeah they're pricey.
I know right? I'd seen them before but only the comic book stuff which looks amazing except for the logo.
This x10000
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm
We talked more about my name change stuff, as when I first told him about it last month he was kinda confused and perplexed. After this he understands a lot more, and understands my reasoning! I think he quietly likes that I am letting the name he wanted to give me as a first name shine.
He is uh, not sure how my mum will take either of these developments. But ah well.
also one of my high school teachers I have on facebook messaged me to tell me that not only does she acknowledge my name change, but thinks I now have amazing pen name potential (she was one of english teachers)
National guard in five states defy Trump's transgender troop ban
No seriously, I am just processing and not really sad. It would even be ok if I was sad and you wouldn't need to fix it.
And if you tell me to smile I will punch you.
XBL:Phenyhelm - 3DS:Phenyhelm