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What's squishy, stretchy and transforms almost anything? ITS [Love]

1235799

Posts

  • OghulkOghulk Tinychat Janitor TinychatRegistered User regular
    Call me Moses cause I'm gonna part your red sea

  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    Quit bragging about your monster dong, Blake!

  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    Why collect 100 foreskins when you could just have mine

  • GvzbgulGvzbgul Registered User regular
    Uriel wrote: »
    You know what would make church more popular?

    Spice up that boring old bible with some sweet comic book illustrations.
    This was the shit.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Picture_Bible
    The_Picture_Bible.jpg

  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    When my other brother on the orders of my greater family came a looting after my father died. He took a lot of stuff but he left my families bible that is old like 1880's old
    I really find that odd

  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited July 2019
    I didn’t really have negative church experiences, to be honest. On a personal level there is no bitterness there.

    What bums me out is how UK (and white US culture) is so intrinsically tied to Christianity that it’s nigh on impossible to avoid it in any meaningful way. And a lot of things that aren’t Christian are appropriating from other cultures so that’s not cool, either. Or it’s already been adopted by white supremacists.

    And while making up your own, new traditions is possible, it’s also pretty hard! At least, I find it hard.

    Janson on
  • NightDragonNightDragon 6th Grade Username Registered User regular
    I've been inside of a church twice, not including weddings. I'm happy to keep it that way.

  • BrainleechBrainleech 機知に富んだコメントはここにあります Registered User regular
    Janson wrote: »
    I didn’t really have negative church experiences, to be honest. On a personal level there is no bitterness there.

    What bums me out is how UK (and white US culture) is so intrinsically tied to Christianity that it’s nigh on impossible to avoid it in any meaningful way. And a lot of things that aren’t Christian are appropriating from other cultures so that’s not cool, either. Or it’s already been adopted by white supremacists.

    And while making up your own, new traditions is possible, it’s also pretty hard! At least, I find it hard.

    I know when I joined the Corps when people would go to church I was left to my own devices so I would just run or do my daily exercises
    When I moved here it was ever so awkward as NM is very religious to say what I really did on Sunday or why I was unmarried or lacking in children or...… Yeah it was something I had no idea how to talk about or what to talk about?

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2019
    Janson wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    I wonder what a church service is like

    Mostly just really boring and/or guilt-inducing, though I miss the singing practice I’d get

    I unno how the Anglicans get up to it, but the Catholic service is three readings from the Bible, 15-20 minutes of the priest analyzing the Gospel (third reading, from the New Testament) or speaking on the topic, or generally trying to provoke thought on the readings for that day and how they’re relevant or applicable to daily life, then 15-20 minutes to do the spiel and ritual and have everybody who can/wants come up and get the little Jesus wafer.

    Like most literary analysis, you kinda get out what you put into it. If it wasn’t for the whole history of murder/ethnic cleansing and constant facilitation and covering up of child abuse, plus all kinds of other horrendous shit like persecution of LGBT folks lurking in the background, it’d be a pretty okay experience! If you ain’t too hot on getting another humans perspective on what the Bible supposedly means in a modern context, yeah, it’s gonna be kind of boring.

    You’re not really gonna get a ton of wildly varying perspectives from the church though, especially if your local priests are extremely local dudes, though there is some minor variation depending on what order they studied with.

    sarukun on
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2019
    Mortal Sky wrote: »
    I was raised Episcopalian, and I am still so used to being part of High Anglican liturgy churches that were at minimum politically center-left while also being extraordinarily ritualistic to a formalized degree*, that I routinely just forget a lot of American Christianity is neither of those and that a lot of people get bummed out by it at the very least (especially in nerdy and left-leaning circles, both of which I end up in as a rule)

    I do think a lot of people totally miss the Episcopal Church on their way away from the Catholic Church or the Evangelicals, which is a shame because I think there's a lot to offer there for people who want to get away from churches that are some flavor of intolerant

    *most Episcopal churches aren't High church, but golly does my mom love them (and is now working at the National Cathedral which is High enough to put a Catholic to shame)

    What I know of the Episcopalians makes me think I’d fit in pretty cozily if I was doing church any more.

    sarukun on
  • BelruelBelruel NARUTO FUCKS Registered User regular
    Veldrin wrote: »
    In other love news

    I think I’ve posted before about late night incidents with my partner which seemingly culminated in me unwittingly participating in a low-key exorcism at like 3am

    well, last night was spooky bedtime redux

    I woke up to her whispering in her sleep continuously for a few minutes, which I didn’t think much of, so I waited until she was done and I rolled over to go back to sleep.

    No sooner had I turned my back to her, I felt her jerk slightly towards me and let out a stream of loud and very rapid tongue clicking in my direction.

    I layed still for a minute or so, very awake and thoroughly creeped out, not wanting to startle her. Then I turned back over and lightly touched her shoulder to relax her. She didn’t respond for a few seconds, and then suddenly SLAMMED her other arm down on the mattress with a forceful sigh.

    She then happily rolled over, nestled into the sheet and started snoring.

    Sleeptalking/walking is so fun. My boyfriend does as well, though my favorite is when he sleep screams, or sleep laughs because that's always super great. No late night exorcisms yet though.

    vmn6rftb232b.png
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    sarukun wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    I wonder what a church service is like

    Mostly just really boring and/or guilt-inducing, though I miss the singing practice I’d get

    I unno how the Anglicans get up to it, but the Catholic service is three readings from the Bible, 15-20 minutes of the priest analyzing the Gospel (third reading, from the New Testament) or speaking on the topic, or generally trying to provoke thought on the readings for that day and how they’re relevant or applicable to daily life, then 15-20 minutes to do the spiel and ritual and have everybody who can/wants come up and get the little Jesus wafer.

    Like most literary analysis, you kinda get out what you put into it. If it wasn’t for the whole history of murder/ethnic cleansing and constant facilitation and covering up of child abuse, plus all kinds of other horrendous shit like persecution of LGBT folks lurking in the background, it’d be a pretty okay experience! If you ain’t too hot on getting another humans perspective on what the Bible supposedly means in a modern context, yeah, it’s gonna be kind of boring.

    I attended Catholic school more than I did Anglican school, and probably went to an equal number of services, plus I more recently attended Catholic services (grandparents’ funeral, brother’s wedding), so actually it’s the Anglican service I can’t really recall to mind right now!

    I debate the ‘okay experience’ part, though. Like even divorced from all the horrendous shit you mention I feel there’s some psychologically damaging stuff there. I read this article just now and hot damn does it resonate with me. My mom really took the ‘you are worthless, place everyone else before yourself’ lesson to heart and she was always emphasizing that to us and ugh, it’s making me realize that it’s been over a decade and I still struggle.

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    I had a really interesting discussion with my parent's priest (they sing in a choir, my Dad isn't religious but my Mum is a bit) because they were doing a survey of people who don't go to church but people in their family do, because like those are the guys you're probably most likely to get through the door I think? Personal connection and that.

    And anyway I went to have a chat and he asked me why my parents are closely connected to a church but I'm not at all, and I told him that firstly no belief in God (doesn't help) but probably more significantly that I actually like a lot of what Jesus had to say but I don't think Christians in society really espouse that. And he didn't take offense so much as he was maybe a little upset that someone could think that the Christian Church wasn't Christian.

    Stuff like when the Archbishop of Canterbury was interviewed and said he didn't have a straight answer on gay marriage in the Anglican Church, which he admitted was a cop-out, and of course he is fine with it but there are political considerations. But shouldn't the church be more interested in right and wrong than political considerations? Jesus would not been unable to answer that question.

    But it was really interesting and I did come away thinking that probably at least that church was considerably more Christian than my impression of the wider Anglican Church. And also I think that the nutter evangelicals give all of them an awful name and other Christians could probably do with being seen to bollock them more.

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Janson wrote: »
    sarukun wrote: »
    Janson wrote: »
    Uriel wrote: »
    I wonder what a church service is like

    Mostly just really boring and/or guilt-inducing, though I miss the singing practice I’d get

    I unno how the Anglicans get up to it, but the Catholic service is three readings from the Bible, 15-20 minutes of the priest analyzing the Gospel (third reading, from the New Testament) or speaking on the topic, or generally trying to provoke thought on the readings for that day and how they’re relevant or applicable to daily life, then 15-20 minutes to do the spiel and ritual and have everybody who can/wants come up and get the little Jesus wafer.

    Like most literary analysis, you kinda get out what you put into it. If it wasn’t for the whole history of murder/ethnic cleansing and constant facilitation and covering up of child abuse, plus all kinds of other horrendous shit like persecution of LGBT folks lurking in the background, it’d be a pretty okay experience! If you ain’t too hot on getting another humans perspective on what the Bible supposedly means in a modern context, yeah, it’s gonna be kind of boring.

    I attended Catholic school more than I did Anglican school, and probably went to an equal number of services, plus I more recently attended Catholic services (grandparents’ funeral, brother’s wedding), so actually it’s the Anglican service I can’t really recall to mind right now!

    I debate the ‘okay experience’ part, though. Like even divorced from all the horrendous shit you mention I feel there’s some psychologically damaging stuff there. I read this article just now and hot damn does it resonate with me. My mom really took the ‘you are worthless, place everyone else before yourself’ lesson to heart and she was always emphasizing that to us and ugh, it’s making me realize that it’s been over a decade and I still struggle.

    That sounds pretty awful and I don’t think you’re alone in your experience, but I always felt that I was pushed towards personal responsibility over self-loathing. I’m inclined to believe that women in particular are encouraged to put themselves second, but I don’t think my mother or my sister ever felt particularly pressured to do this either. It would be worth asking them how they remember their experience. I definitely think parents relationship with church plays a huge role in how it exists in children’s lives, and I don’t really recall church occupying a ton of family time outside of Sunday’s and communion/confirmation classes.

    My relationship with church and the Bible was very much one of “you need to go, but after that it’s up to you what you do with it”. I have since learned that this is not really everyone’s experience, but I don’t really have a ton of negative memories and never felt like it had much control over how we lived. I always felt it was interesting and provoked reflection.

    It wasn’t until I started studying history that I learned about what a dark and horrible past the modern institution is built on, and how much shady shit it continues to get up to today.

  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    Ugh, yes. Literally millions of stolen, disappeared or murdered children in countries like Spain and Ireland and Canada, and that’s just some of the articles that have been published in recent years. It’s on an unfathomable scale.

  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    On a lighter note, I was ruminating today on how there’s only two people ever I have been able to be myself around, and luckily one of those people is married to me

    I really do appreciate that @Moriveth accepts me wholeheartedly and that I can literally tell him anything!

    Also Niko sleepwalks/sleeptalks and sometimes that goes hand in hand with night terrors, which are very sad to witness, but then he cuddles up with us and is comforted and it’s nice to know we can do that for him

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    My little 3 month old nephew has started quite regularly waking up suddenly screaming and crying. I guess he's having nightmares? It's weird to me that such a young mind is capable of that.

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2019
    Everybody deals with stress, nightmares are usually your brain processing stressful shit you’re experiencing in waking life.

    Edit: i definitely experience way more nightmares when i’m Stressed out, anyway.

    sarukun on
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    He can feel himself slowly starting the path to adulthood and howls in existential terror, which is only fair

  • EinzelEinzel Registered User regular
    No, I don't want a desk job!

  • KelorKelor Registered User regular
    Are we good to ask for dating advice in here? I can't find anywhere else other than making a post in H&A and it isn't really that urgent.

  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    That is theoretically the point of the thread!

  • Mortal SkyMortal Sky queer punk hedge witchRegistered User regular
    edited July 2019
    The American and Scottish Episcopal denominations are weirdly different in some subtle ways from the Anglican Church proper even though it's all technically the same sect

    Some really major cultural and outlook differences in there (especially on homosexuality and other social issues), to the point where some of the most conservative Anglican archdioceses won't even officially communicate with the Americans or Scots

    When I did chemistry teaching work at an Anglican school in Tanzania for a few months last year, I got a huge amount of prep work from the Episcopals basically saying "hey look, you're about to grapple with the fact that this used to be the Church of colonialism, and the fact some of the harmful attitudes perpetuated are still very much out there"

    Mortal Sky on
  • JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    That is theoretically the point of the thread!

    It is?

    GDdCWMm.jpg
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    9 year old bowen thought church was really fucking bizarre (the first time I had been to one with a friend) and 35 year old bowen agrees still to this day

    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    church is so boring

    as a child I thought it was a boring waste of time

    as an adult I can choose not to go! and I never will!

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited July 2019
    It was a lot less bizarre when nobody knew anything about how anything works.


    Not zero percent bizarre, but less bizarre than now for sure.

    Edit: I should say the PERCEPTION of it was less obviously bizarre, I guess.

    sarukun on
  • SolarSolar Registered User regular
    I find religion and such absolutely fascinating to study and as such I'd never go to a church service out of pure curiosity as is because these are people at workship, not a museum exhibit.

  • BroloBrolo Broseidon Lord of the BroceanRegistered User regular
    Brolo wrote: »
    church is so boring

    as a child I thought it was a boring waste of time

    as an adult I can choose not to go! and I never will!

    Man: I wish those bloody bells would stop.

    Wife: Oh, it's quite nice dear, it's Sunday, it's the church.

    M: What about us atheists? Why should we 'ave to listen to that sectarian turmoil?

    W: You're a lapsed atheist, dear.

    M: The principle's the same. The Mohmedans don't come 'round here wavin' bells at us! We don't get Buddhists playing bagpipes in our bathroom! Or Hindus harmonizing in the hall! The Shintus don't come here shattering sheet glass in the shithouse, shouting slogans-

    W: All right, don't practice your alliteration on me.

    M: Anyway, when I membership card and blazer badge back from the League of Agnostics, I shall urge the executive to lodge a protest against that religious racket! Pass the butter knife!

    W: WHAT??

    M: PASS THE BUTTER KNIFE!! (pause) THANK YOU! IF ONLY WE HAD SOME KIND OF MISSILE!

    W: 'OLD ON, I'LL CLOSE THE WINDOW.

    M: WHAT?!

    W: I SAID, I'LL CLOSE THE WINDOW!

    (Sound: Window closing, bells get faint, but are still there)

    M: If only we had some kind of missile, we could take the steam out of those bells.

    W: Well, you could always use the number 14-St. Joseph-the-somewhat- divine-on-the-hill ballistic missile. It's in the attic.

    M: What ballistic missile would this be, then?

    (Sound: Bells begin to get increasingly louder)

    W: I made it for you, it's your birthday present!

    M: Just what I wanted, 'ow nice of you to remember, my pet. 'ERE!

    W: WHAT?

    M: THOSE BELLS ARE GETTING LOUDER!

    W: WHAT?

    M: THOSE BELLS ARE GETTING LOUDER!!

    W: THE BELLS ARE GETTING LOUDER! OOOH, LOOK!

    M: WHAT?

    W: THE CHURCH, IT.. ITS COMING CLOSER! ITS COMING DOWN THE 'ILL!

    M: WHAT A LIBERTY!

    W: ITS TURNING INTO OUR LANE! WELL, YOU BETTER GO PUT IT OUT OF IT'S MISERY.

    M: WHERE'S THIS MISSILE, THEN?

    W: IT'S IN THE ATTIC. PRESS THE BUTTON MARKED CHURCH!

    M: 'OW DO I AIM IT?

    W: IT AUTOMATICALLY HOMES IN ON THE NEAREST PLACE OF WORSHIP!

    M: BUT THAT'S ST. MARKS!

    W: IT ISN'T NOW, LOOK!! OH, ITS OP'NING THE GATE.

    M: WHAT? USE THE MEGAPHONE!

    W: IT'S OP'NING THE GATE!! 'HURRY UP, ITS TRAMPLING OVER THE AZALIAS!

    (Sound: Missle launch, explosion, bells diminish)

    M: Did I 'it it?

    W: Yes, right up the aisle.

    M: Well I've always said, There's nothing an agnostic can't do if he really doesn't know whether he believes in anything or not.

  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    I find religion and such absolutely fascinating to study and as such I'd never go to a church service out of pure curiosity as is because these are people at workship, not a museum exhibit.

    I feel like it is fine to study people provided you do not draw undue attention to the fact that you are studying them.

    Either you can study everybody or you can't study anybody, and I feel like it is, especially in this day and age, a matter of survival to study certain groups of people, so I'ma go with study err'buddy.

    But it's cool if you don't wanna.

  • JuggernutJuggernut Registered User regular
    I was raised southern baptist and sent to a private Christian school for most of my childhood. All of it contributed to what I would consider some serious issues but the school is what really fucked me up.

    I was constantly miserable, afraid, paranoid and bitterly angry at the outside world for years. (this was in the run up to and during the Obama administration and the hight of "He's a Kenyan Antichrist" fundy bullshit) I just happened to be lucky enough to realize why everything sucked and I hated life was because everybody was telling me, a 15 year old kid, for 6 out of 7 days a week, we were living in the End Times and those scary gays and muslims and brown people in general wanted to throw all us good, white Christians into camps and persecute us. Maybe break out the lions for old times sake.

    I had a reverse finding religion moment when I said "wait, this is all hot bullshit" and I immediately felt a weight lift off me. I didn't have to hate or be afraid of people anymore! What joy!

    Now everything sucks for actual, quantifiable reasons like climate change, our current president trying to drop a Third Riech remix and youtube influencers.

  • Brovid HasselsmofBrovid Hasselsmof [Growling historic on the fury road] Registered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    He can feel himself slowly starting the path to adulthood and howls in existential terror, which is only fair

    Maybe I should stop leaning over his cot and whispering "I'm sorry about climate change and fascism and ocean acidification and plastic and antibiotic resistance and war" as he falls asleep

  • TallahasseerielTallahasseeriel Registered User regular
    edited July 2019
    I do remember being treated like I was weird in school because my parents didn't take me to church.

    I probably wouldn't have liked it much, not enough video games in church I imagine.

    Plus I would be in Sunday school being a little smartass like "where is the evidence"ing and "how do you know"ing about everthing.

    Actually considering my age I probably would have told them the resurrection sounded like a rip-off of the then rather recent death of superman.

    Tallahasseeriel on
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    Solar wrote: »
    He can feel himself slowly starting the path to adulthood and howls in existential terror, which is only fair

    Maybe I should stop leaning over his cot and whispering "I'm sorry about climate change and fascism and ocean acidification and plastic and antibiotic resistance and war" as he falls asleep

    I think this would give me anxiety even if I didn't understand any of the words being used.

  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    I’ve never really been to church other than for like... funerals and weddings?

    Oh and I went to the Vatican. Which I guess is like, superchurch

  • TallahasseerielTallahasseeriel Registered User regular
    Remember that assassin's creed where ezio gets into a fist fight with the pope?

  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    Yeah, turns out they just let you do that at the Vatican if you ask

  • DouglasDangerDouglasDanger PennsylvaniaRegistered User regular
    I am leaning towards atheism, after being raised as a Methodist with the occasional"the Baptists are too liberal" "our beliefs basically align with the (absolutely heinously bigoted and this is actual hate speech) Chick Tracts grandparents and aunts and uncles on my Dad's side during the summer

    I occasionally go to a fairly relaxed church with my girlfriend and her family

    It's an interesting bit of theater and a good time for quiet meditation, I guess

    So far everyone is fine with me not really participating

  • StraightziStraightzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User regular
    Belruel wrote: »
    Veldrin wrote: »
    In other love news

    I think I’ve posted before about late night incidents with my partner which seemingly culminated in me unwittingly participating in a low-key exorcism at like 3am

    well, last night was spooky bedtime redux

    I woke up to her whispering in her sleep continuously for a few minutes, which I didn’t think much of, so I waited until she was done and I rolled over to go back to sleep.

    No sooner had I turned my back to her, I felt her jerk slightly towards me and let out a stream of loud and very rapid tongue clicking in my direction.

    I layed still for a minute or so, very awake and thoroughly creeped out, not wanting to startle her. Then I turned back over and lightly touched her shoulder to relax her. She didn’t respond for a few seconds, and then suddenly SLAMMED her other arm down on the mattress with a forceful sigh.

    She then happily rolled over, nestled into the sheet and started snoring.

    Sleeptalking/walking is so fun. My boyfriend does as well, though my favorite is when he sleep screams, or sleep laughs because that's always super great. No late night exorcisms yet though.

    I do all sorts of sleep talking, for better and for worse (one time I told a girlfriend that I was going to break up with her like a month before I actually did). Overall I'm not fond of it, as a person who enjoys secrets, but I have a few notable incidents that I like:

    The first was when I was maybe 12 - my mom, my cousin, and I were all sleeping in the basement because the AC was broken. I began telling them a story about how I had sold my foot, which they recounted the next morning. Weirdly, I remembered my dreams for once, and they perfectly lined up with this - my foot had fallen asleep in the night, and I, fed up with its shit, went to a cliche "Arabian Market" and sold it to someone.

    The second was my freshman year of college. My roommate's girlfriend was staying over, and apparently, partway through the night, I sat up straight, looked her dead in the eye, and let out a death rattle, then slowly lowered myself back into bed. I'm honestly a bit surprised I didn't get an exorcism for that one, but I think she just found it funny.

  • KelorKelor Registered User regular
    I got out of a fairly unhealthy long term relationship about seven months ago, started keto, joined the gym, lost a lot of weight and about a month back joined Okcupid. I've been on several dates and met two women I've hit things off with.

    The first is definitely into me and wants to hook up. We've got some common interests, conversation is easy and we'd have spent more time together other than work making it awkward to find time. She has also recently gotten out of a LTR as well (it hasn't been said explicitly but it doesn't sound like it was a ammicable break up) and seems fine with it. She is vegetarian, which makes things awkward since I can't have a lot of certain vegetables and meat is a frequent part of my meals but it's a small potatos thing.

    The second girl I've vibed much harder with although we only met a fortnight ago, we'll have the same thought at the same time or cut each other off mid joke, share a lot of interests in Egyptian history, scifi, space and is also doing keto, so it makes choosing places to go easy. I'm having a harder time getting a read on her, she's happy to take things slow and that's fine with me, I'm not really looking for anything immediately serious after how my last relationship ended.


    I've been out of the dating game for a long time, so I'm in need of a second opinion I guess. I've been on two dates with both, and could see being great friends with either but if I'm being honest am more attracted to the second girl and don't want to lead on the first. I've mentioned to her when we first started talking that I was a bit gunshy about getting too serious but I don't want to treat her (and it wouldn't be fair to her) as a safety plan in case things don't work out with the second girl.

    In the past all my relationships have been one at a time, I haven't been seeing multiple women at once and haven't dated in seven years so I'm not even sure expectations are after a couple of dates these days.

    Is the answer I just need to have a candid conversation with the first girl before we get together next and discuss what she's looking for at the moment?

This discussion has been closed.