[Star Wars] Yay Jar Jar!

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  • Doctor DetroitDoctor Detroit Registered User regular
  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    My brother, who didn't like TLJ, also didn't like ROS when he watched it today
    Finally got to yell PALPATINE FUCKS at him. No, Twitter lied because I said so.

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  • GoumindongGoumindong Registered User regular

    It gets worse. Not only is death not respected but character moments, motivation, and growth are also not.

    I am sure there are more but frankly i cannot be bothered to actually like think more about the movie than this one, which makes me so fucking mad. So fucking mad.

    When Kylo is fighting Rey, Rey stabs and then heals him. She stabs him right where he had stabbed Han. Then Kylo is stunned, defeated, Rey leaves and Kylo talks to the memory of his father. He realizes that he never had to do the thing he did. That he could have gone back even after he stabbed him. He repeats the conversation he had with his father in TFA right before he killed him and tells his father that he knows what he has to do. Then throws his lightsaber away rejecting the fundamental dichotomy of the series and with it his identity. He did not need a Jedi weapon and his desire for it had destroyed his life. He had rejected the idea of being a knight. Like Luke, he going to help fix some of the mistakes he had made, those he could still fix. He was getting off his island to become a Skywalker.

    And then the very next fucking scene he is getting beat up because he doesn't have a lightsaber and so Rey teleports another lightsaber to him because apparently that scene meant fucking and laser swords are actually special. And then we beat Palpatine with the power of two lightsabers. And fuck this movie.


    ----

    Also they forgot that Finn almost dies. He does his big dramatic sacrifice only to be saved at the last moment while also succeeding at the thing he was going to do his sacrifice for. Getting that best of both worlds. Why did they forget this? Well because we always knew he was going to be saved and wasn't going to die because fucking duh this scene came at the end of the movie.

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  • RMS OceanicRMS Oceanic Registered User regular
    RoS
    Oh dear that planet we visited blew up. But it's okay, the two characters we spent any time with are okay!

    Elvenshae
  • MonwynMonwyn Registered User regular
    Opty wrote: »
    I think I actively disliked TRoS more than any of the other movies, including the prequels. It just puts a bad taste in your mouth from the word go with the crawl revealing utter bullshit and then just gets worse from there.

    TRoS is I think the only movie that has made me genuinely angry at it as I watched it, because it's very clear that the writers, directors, and producers think I'm a complete fucking idiot. That movie was insulting. If I hadn't been watching it with my parents I'd have walked out around the time the ancient sith dagger was revealed to line up with ruins on Endor.

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    Elvenshae
  • Doctor DetroitDoctor Detroit Registered User regular
    Also, that article just glosses over Rey dying.

    And I’m still convinced that Filoni didn’t learn that Ahsoka was part of the Jedi voices until it was too late to do anything about it. And him trying to be all “just because the rest of them are dead doesn’t mean she is” just really rubs me the wrong way. It comes across the same as JJ’s “sure, Rey’s parents were nobodies, but her grandpa...”

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  • QuidQuid I don't... what... hnnng Registered User regular
    RoS
    Oh dear that planet we visited blew up. But it's okay, the two characters we spent any time with are okay!

    RoS:

    “Oh no that person is dead! “

    “Lol jk. Also this is retroactive.”

    “Wait what?”

    “THE DEAD SPEAK!”

    ShadowenSteelhawkElvenshaeRaiju
  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    edited September 13
    The sith knife makes perfect sense in universe. Opaque force visions that flip the bird to causality is exactly the kind of thing that makes the force cool and mysterious.

    Nobeard on
    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
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  • KetarKetar Come on upstairs we're having a partyRegistered User regular
    Nobeard wrote: »
    The sith knife makes perfect sense in universe. Opaque force visions that flip the bird to causality is exactly the kind of thing that makes the force cool and mysterious.

    Hard disagree.

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  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    I think you can do weird Sith bullshit, but you have to lean in much, much harder than they did for it to even approach working.

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  • AistanAistan Tiny Bat Registered User regular
    Weird-ass sith force vision knives are one thing but if you give one to your minion who doesn't have force powers as a map to get back to you you're setting yourself up for failure.

    Literally nothing about the knife's role in the universe makes sense.

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  • OptyOpty Registered User regular
    The movie felt to me like there were a bunch of "locked in" scenes and then they did whatever they wanted, no matter how nonsensical, to connect them all. Oh, this scene we wanted later in the movie has a character we killed in a previous scene? Well they didn't die. How didn't they die? We won't tell you.

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  • autono-wally, erotibot300autono-wally, erotibot300 love machine Registered User regular
    I mean, yeah, that's what probably happened. Some cool set piece scenes got thought up, then they were Frankensteined into a movie

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  • Linespider5Linespider5 ALL HAIL KING KILLMONGER Registered User regular
    I wouldn’t mind a Star Wars setting where light sabers aren’t even a thing.

    I would even go so far as to say, no light sabers but keep jedi. Show me a jedi without a laser sword, relying entirely on their knowledge of the force (but also absolutely not just force grabbing random objects all the do dah day for battle solutions) to get things done but only having the regular weaponry of the average Star Wars spacefarer as their backup. I could imagine a version of Star Wars where only the Sith have lightsabers given how outrageously dangerous and capable of destruction they are, and where Jedi reject them outright because of this.

  • Atlas in ChainsAtlas in Chains Registered User regular
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

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  • mRahmanimRahmani DetroitRegistered User regular
    Show me a jedi without a laser sword, relying entirely on their knowledge of the force (but also absolutely not just force grabbing random objects all the do dah day for battle solutions) to get things done but only having the regular weaponry of the average Star Wars spacefarer as their backup.

    I am one with the force and the force is with me.

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  • QuidQuid I don't... what... hnnng Registered User regular
    mRahmani wrote: »
    Show me a jedi without a laser sword, relying entirely on their knowledge of the force (but also absolutely not just force grabbing random objects all the do dah day for battle solutions) to get things done but only having the regular weaponry of the average Star Wars spacefarer as their backup.

    I am one with the force and the force is with me.

    I would definitely like to see more non or pseudo jedi force users. Fewer Anakins more Ahsokas please.

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  • reVersereVerse Attack and Dethrone God Registered User regular
    Quid wrote: »
    mRahmani wrote: »
    Show me a jedi without a laser sword, relying entirely on their knowledge of the force (but also absolutely not just force grabbing random objects all the do dah day for battle solutions) to get things done but only having the regular weaponry of the average Star Wars spacefarer as their backup.

    I am one with the force and the force is with me.

    I would definitely like to see more non or pseudo jedi force users. Fewer Anakins more Ahsokas please.

    What about if your highest level dark side skill was conjuring up a big ball of fire?

  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    reVerse wrote: »
    Quid wrote: »
    mRahmani wrote: »
    Show me a jedi without a laser sword, relying entirely on their knowledge of the force (but also absolutely not just force grabbing random objects all the do dah day for battle solutions) to get things done but only having the regular weaponry of the average Star Wars spacefarer as their backup.

    I am one with the force and the force is with me.

    I would definitely like to see more non or pseudo jedi force users. Fewer Anakins more Ahsokas please.

    What about if your highest level dark side skill was conjuring up a big ball of fire?

    Goodness gracious.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
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  • Doctor DetroitDoctor Detroit Registered User regular
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

    Counterpoint: Dooku.

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  • NobeardNobeard North Carolina: Failed StateRegistered User regular
    A kind of fencing-like stance makes a lot of sense for a lightsaber. You don't need much leverage like a real sword when you have plasma on a stick.

    I'm not saying we are going to have an autocratic dystopia, but things keep happening that look like they come from an autocratic dystopia.
  • JoolanderJoolander Registered User regular
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

    Counterpoint: Dooku.

    Nah. They said the curved handle on his lightsaber was to make a fencing style easier, but then in all the movies he chokes up on the grip and swings it around like everybody else

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  • MatevMatev Cero Miedo Registered User regular
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

    The Grand Inquisitor says hello

    "Go down, kick ass, and set yourselves up as gods, that's our Prime Directive!"
    Hail Hydra
  • FencingsaxFencingsax It is difficult to get a man to understand, when his salary depends upon his not understanding GNU Terry PratchettRegistered User regular
    Matev wrote: »
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

    The Grand Inquisitor says hello

    Is he the one with the stupid spinning handle?

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    VoodooV
  • MatevMatev Cero Miedo Registered User regular
    Fencingsax wrote: »
    Matev wrote: »
    Man, fuck that, they block lasers. That's dope. If you want to do something different, treat it like a foil. Musketeer style, pistol and foil. Everybody swings them around like they do crushing damage, but a fencer with a lightsaber would look so cool on screen.

    The Grand Inquisitor says hello

    Is he the one with the stupid spinning handle?

    Technically, all the Inquisitors do, but in the first part of his 1st appearance, he is straight up Douglas Fairbanks fencing Kanan and beating his ass doing it. The spinning blades are kinda silly and I wish they didn't use them, but there were still good points.

    "Go down, kick ass, and set yourselves up as gods, that's our Prime Directive!"
    Hail Hydra
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  • NosfNosf Registered User regular
    I don't think when I saw Starkiller base (really?) I was supposed to groan and slap my forehead.

    NightslyrhonoveremRahmani
  • NightslyrNightslyr Registered User regular
    Nosf wrote: »
    I don't think when I saw Starkiller base (really?) I was supposed to groan and slap my forehead.

    My favorite part of Starkiller Base is during the briefing when it's compared to the Death Star. It's the film equivalent of JJ bragging about his member. It's hilarious.

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  • Havelock2.0Havelock2.0 Registered User regular
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    I've seen things you people wouldn't believe
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  • Commander ZoomCommander Zoom Registered User regular
    Nightslyr wrote: »
    Nosf wrote: »
    I don't think when I saw Starkiller base (really?) I was supposed to groan and slap my forehead.

    My favorite part of Starkiller Base is during the briefing when it's compared to the Death Star. It's the film equivalent of JJ bragging about his member. It's hilarious.

    He did the same fucking thing with the 2009 Enterprise, which is bigger than the original, hell it's bigger than the Galaxy-class because it just is, okay?

    And then in the next movie the Vengeance is even more stupidly big because of course it is, the fucker.

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  • Atlas in ChainsAtlas in Chains Registered User regular
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    I assumed the opposite. Or, maybe the same thing, but from another angle. The Inquisitors are the guys that are too weak to be a threat to Vader and the Emperor. The special lightsaber is their crutch, it's the Harlem Globetrotter version of saber fighting. My problem with the spinning saber was that it looked dumb when it doesn't emit from the hilt. That's all, the aesthetic was off, lightsabers work a certain way and it didn't look like it should function.

    Shadowen
  • cloudeaglecloudeagle Registered User regular
    Quid wrote: »
    RoS
    Oh dear that planet we visited blew up. But it's okay, the two characters we spent any time with are okay!

    RoS:

    “Oh no that person is dead! “

    “Lol jk. Also this is retroactive.”

    “Wait what?”

    “THE DEAD SPEAK!”

    I swear, the text scroll in that movie should have started with "Yep, we're doing Emperor Palpatine again!"

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  • Local H JayLocal H Jay Registered User regular
    I blame all the fans who said they wanted the EU back. They heard that and said "oh you sure you want that?"

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  • ShivahnShivahn Unaware of her barrel shifter privilege Western coastal temptressRegistered User regular
    Nightslyr wrote: »
    Nosf wrote: »
    I don't think when I saw Starkiller base (really?) I was supposed to groan and slap my forehead.

    My favorite part of Starkiller Base is during the briefing when it's compared to the Death Star. It's the film equivalent of JJ bragging about his member. It's hilarious.

    No, fuck you, now I'm thinking of it like Trump designed Starkiller base

    "Well, if you look at the hologram, this is the size of the Obama inauguration crowd...

    and this is Trump's inauguration crowd"

    *audience gasps*

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  • Doctor DetroitDoctor Detroit Registered User regular
    cloudeagle wrote: »
    Quid wrote: »
    RoS
    Oh dear that planet we visited blew up. But it's okay, the two characters we spent any time with are okay!

    RoS:

    “Oh no that person is dead! “

    “Lol jk. Also this is retroactive.”

    “Wait what?”

    “THE DEAD SPEAK!”

    I swear, the text scroll in that movie should have started with "Yep, we're doing Emperor Palpatine again!"

    In light of what else was revealed in the movie, “doing Emperor Palpatine” is oddly appropriate.

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  • KanaKana Registered User regular
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    And that's pretty much how it plays out in rebels, too. The spinny shit is intimidating against like the barely trained noobs, but when ahsoka or maul show up its just kind of a dumb crutch the inquisitors use to try to hide their lack of real skill.

    A trap is for fish: when you've got the fish, you can forget the trap. A snare is for rabbits: when you've got the rabbit, you can forget the snare. Words are for meaning: when you've got the meaning, you can forget the words.
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  • SteelhawkSteelhawk Registered User regular
    Kana wrote: »
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    And that's pretty much how it plays out in rebels, too. The spinny shit is intimidating against like the barely trained noobs, but when ahsoka or maul show up its just kind of a dumb crutch the inquisitors use to try to hide their lack of real skill.

    True. I haven't seen in a while, but Kanan and Ezra were all, "Oh shit!" and Ashoka was like, "Pfft."

    Elvenshae
  • Ninja Snarl PNinja Snarl P My helmet is my burden. Ninja Snarl: Gone, but not forgotten.Registered User regular
    edited September 14
    Nightslyr wrote: »
    Nosf wrote: »
    I don't think when I saw Starkiller base (really?) I was supposed to groan and slap my forehead.

    My favorite part of Starkiller Base is during the briefing when it's compared to the Death Star. It's the film equivalent of JJ bragging about his member. It's hilarious.

    He did the same fucking thing with the 2009 Enterprise, which is bigger than the original, hell it's bigger than the Galaxy-class because it just is, okay?

    And then in the next movie the Vengeance is even more stupidly big because of course it is, the fucker.

    NuTrek was pretty rife with that tendency. Starbase Yorktown is more like some Culture-grade megatructure than anything we've ever seen built by the Federation, complete with starship-sized transport tubes running underneath transparent streets.

    Ninja Snarl P on
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  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    Steelhawk wrote: »
    Kana wrote: »
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    And that's pretty much how it plays out in rebels, too. The spinny shit is intimidating against like the barely trained noobs, but when ahsoka or maul show up its just kind of a dumb crutch the inquisitors use to try to hide their lack of real skill.

    True. I haven't seen in a while, but Kanan and Ezra were all, "Oh shit!" and Ashoka was like, "Pfft."

    And then the inquisitors use their spinny lightsabers to fly and it goes right back to being ridiculous.

    Ringo wrote: »
    Well except what see317 said. That guy's always wrong.
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  • SteelhawkSteelhawk Registered User regular
    see317 wrote: »
    Steelhawk wrote: »
    Kana wrote: »
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    And that's pretty much how it plays out in rebels, too. The spinny shit is intimidating against like the barely trained noobs, but when ahsoka or maul show up its just kind of a dumb crutch the inquisitors use to try to hide their lack of real skill.

    True. I haven't seen in a while, but Kanan and Ezra were all, "Oh shit!" and Ashoka was like, "Pfft."

    And then the inquisitors use their spinny lightsabers to fly and it goes right back to being ridiculous.

    Agreed. But I feel like some allowances need to be made for the format of the media. It is intended to be a cartoon for kids. That kinda of stuff happens in cartoons. Its goofy, yeah. But it doesn't make me angry.

    Kana
  • reVersereVerse Attack and Dethrone God Registered User regular
    Steelhawk wrote: »
    see317 wrote: »
    Steelhawk wrote: »
    Kana wrote: »
    I always figured the point of the spinning sabers with the Inquisitors was more for intimidation than anything else.

    They're dealing with force sensitives and padawan survivors

    If a Knight or Master pops up on the radar you get Vader

    And that's pretty much how it plays out in rebels, too. The spinny shit is intimidating against like the barely trained noobs, but when ahsoka or maul show up its just kind of a dumb crutch the inquisitors use to try to hide their lack of real skill.

    True. I haven't seen in a while, but Kanan and Ezra were all, "Oh shit!" and Ashoka was like, "Pfft."

    And then the inquisitors use their spinny lightsabers to fly and it goes right back to being ridiculous.

    Agreed. But I feel like some allowances need to be made for the format of the media. It is intended to be a cartoon for kids. That kinda of stuff happens in cartoons. Its goofy, yeah. But it doesn't make me angry.

    Filoni and crew really missed a golden opportunity by not having the characters say something witty and marketable like "they fly now".

    ElvenshaeShadowen
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