Cant you just throw away "the key to" and be done? Maybe "is one that" too.
it is definitely wordy in an unhelpful way, but i also wonder if there's a specific name or w/e i can use instead of just like "i didn't like this when i read it, less of this"
awkwardly I am expected to teach basic composition despite my degree being in IDEAS and having no functional grasp of language
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Donkey KongPutting Nintendo out of business with AI nipsRegistered Userregular
edited September 2020
Most YA books are garbage but kids are little garbage eating machines when it comes to media. At least the mechanical act of reading is good no matter what.
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Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
At the very least, if you're going to hand your kid Harry Potter, start off explaining to them that the content of these books may contain content that will lead them down an unhealthy path if they aren't critical about it, and if they write like that in college they will be be taking remedial English.
this is a completely ridiculous thing to say and comes across as performative bashing of harry potter because of rowling's political beliefs
I have been saying that Harry Potter is badly written for well over a decade.
I mean I do have time traveling powers but still.
I mean they aren't Tolkien, but they aren't bad for what they are. YA escapist fantasy,
The Potter books are awful completely outside Rowling being a bigot
Find something else to read, don’t tie yourself up in knots with mental gymnastics
All YA is awful!
I can't tell my 10yo to go read Dune.
Or maybe I should.
@zagdrob The Mistborn series is pretty good, and as far as I know Sanderson hasn't turned out to be a bigot yet.
Ordering the series based on this alone.
My kid needs and loves books as long as there is more than a screen. She is reading through the other books by Percy Jacksons author and the Bones Kathy Reichs YA series. So this will be good next.
Then probably Hunger Games cause she is borderline.
It's weird being aware and controlling media when my own parents were like 'fuck it, whatever'.
My only media restriction was my sister and I dhouldnt watch Married With Children when my dad took naps. But we did anyway.
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
Also, the descriptor YA is garbage, and doesn't define anything.
"I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."
Donkey KongPutting Nintendo out of business with AI nipsRegistered Userregular
edited September 2020
I read a lot of Piers Anthony books at an age when the puns, parody, and creepy sex wish fulfillment went over my head. All that was left was some poorly conceived boilerplate magic fantasy journey, with bits stolen from better works and warmed over. I loved it.
Donkey Kong on
Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
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SixCaches Tweets in the mainframe cyberhexRegistered Userregular
At the very least, if you're going to hand your kid Harry Potter, start off explaining to them that the content of these books may contain content that will lead them down an unhealthy path if they aren't critical about it, and if they write like that in college they will be be taking remedial English.
this is a completely ridiculous thing to say and comes across as performative bashing of harry potter because of rowling's political beliefs
I have been saying that Harry Potter is badly written for well over a decade.
I mean I do have time traveling powers but still.
I mean they aren't Tolkien, but they aren't bad for what they are. YA escapist fantasy,
She uses language poorly. Like, her actual sentences are what I'm talking about.
The story is bad, too, but I mean her actual mastery of the English language is not super great.
Long, long ago, I tried to give Harry Potter a shot, and the writing quality itself turned me off *hard*.
The setting was always nonsense, but I would only learn just how bad the story was years and years later, and I don't know it very well.
But the writing was just notably bad. And my standards aren't that dang high! I was reading D&D novels and the like at the time.
Here's an unidentifiable snippet of an extremely common way that the writing I get is un-good.
Hedonism is the belief that the key to a quality life is one that fully consists of pleasure and no pain.
Forgetting the accuracy of the content, this sentence is a struggle. On the one hand, it would make sense if it said the key to a quality life was that it be full of pleasure and no pain. On the other, it would also make sense if it said that a quality life is one that is full of pleasure and no pain. But I'm pretty sure that how it's actually written, "one" refers back to "key" and it ends up literally saying that the key in the figure of speech is what is full of pleasure and not pain, which is a weird category error. Or am I hallucinating that?
"Evil Multifarious" tell me how to copy edit this kind of sentence structure in a way that will be constructive, which is like your actual job, but for free and online
I understand that "one" refers to "quality life" however only from context and after reading the sentence a few times.
Most YA books are garbage but kids are little garbage eating machines when it comes to media. At least the mechanical act of reading is good no matter what.
I cant think of a better description of me from 10 to 16-18.
I was embarrassed when we donated my teenage ;book collection. So much old man fiction and garbage sci-fi bought because the book cover looked interesting at Barnes and Noble.
Luckily I donated it years ago so the only shame I carry within myself.
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
I think I hit mostly did Redwall and Animorphs, then in Middle school and High school pivoted to weighty fiction tomes like Dragonlance and Malazan.
But there are a lot of novels that have been labeled YA recently, in the hopes that those books might sell better. In the "genre is a fiction pushed by publishing companies to sell things", YA is literally a genre created by publishing companies to sell books.
"I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."
Donkey KongPutting Nintendo out of business with AI nipsRegistered Userregular
The Hunger Games was ok but I think there's a few puzzling things in there. They construct a neat political situation but then never really do much with it. The book doesn't have a lot to say beyond "cruelty is bad".
Then there was the strong female lead who fell into a dumbass "which boy do i love" subplot that ate up a huge amount of all the books and could not have been less interesting.
It had the makings of a more interesting story but the author wasn't interested and the audience wasn't interested.
Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
Cant you just throw away "the key to" and be done? Maybe "is one that" too.
it is definitely wordy in an unhelpful way, but i also wonder if there's a specific name or w/e i can use instead of just like "i didn't like this when i read it, less of this"
awkwardly I am expected to teach basic composition despite my degree being in IDEAS and having no functional grasp of language
Hmmm. I think "too wordy" is perfectly descriptive but doesn't really help a weak student who hasn't seen enough examples to identify and fix the issue on their own.
Purdue's Writing Lab (my main resource back when) headlines their advice on this particular issue with "eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers" which seems useless to tell someone who doesnt have a sense for wordiness, but they describe the idea clearly and do give some good examples. I know you're not looking for five magic words to describe it so it clicks, not sure why I'm bashing that description. Anyway.
I read a lot of novels as a kid that weren't terribly sophisticated but were enough to keep my attention at the time. Xanth, MythAdventures, Pern, Dealing with Dragons, and D&D whatever, because the library had those.
Not going to defend any of those.
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SummaryJudgmentGrab the hottest iron you can find, stride in the Tower’s front doorRegistered Userregular
Hey, what AIB partner are ya'll using for the 3080, or are you going FE?
Some days Blue wonders why anyone ever bothered making numbers so small; other days she supposes even infinity needs to start somewhere.
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knitdanIn ur baseKillin ur guysRegistered Userregular
Say what you will about YA at least kids aren’t reading Piers Anthony any more
*as far as I know
“I was quick when I came in here, I’m twice as quick now”
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
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MrMisterJesus dying on the cross in pain? Morally better than us. One has to go "all in".Registered Userregular
Piers Anthony was weird but also it's generally okay if kids read some weird shit
Hey, what AIB partner are ya'll using for the 3080, or are you going FE?
First one I can get MSRP without jumping through hoops.
I really don't care about the marginal differences, I'm just not driving to Madison Heights at 2 in the morning or fighting bots or paying reseller premiums.
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Donkey KongPutting Nintendo out of business with AI nipsRegistered Userregular
Cant you just throw away "the key to" and be done? Maybe "is one that" too.
it is definitely wordy in an unhelpful way, but i also wonder if there's a specific name or w/e i can use instead of just like "i didn't like this when i read it, less of this"
awkwardly I am expected to teach basic composition despite my degree being in IDEAS and having no functional grasp of language
Hmmm. I think "too wordy" is perfectly descriptive but doesn't really help a weak student who hasn't seen enough examples to identify and fix the issue on their own.
Purdue's Writing Lab (my main resource back when) headlines their advice on this particular issue with "eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers" which seems useless to tell someone who doesnt have a sense for wordiness, but they describe the idea clearly and do give some good examples. I know you're not looking for five magic words to describe it so it clicks, not sure why I'm bashing that description. Anyway.
my dad tried to get me to read Piers Anthony because he loved Piers Anthony growing up.
I couldn't get into it.
As I recall, it got worse the more I read it. Panties became way too much of a focal point.
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
I read Wheel of Time in early middle school? At least what was out when I was in early middle school/high school. I caught up at some point in ~10th grade, and he was taking forever, and then I got caught up in Malazan books the Fallen.
The Hobbit and LotR are probably good.
The first couple Dragonlance novels are likely good at that age.
I think I started Wheel of Time around then, but iirc Robert Jordan is one of those people who relies on sex crimes to make bad people feel more bad.
The Temeraire series by Naomi Novik is kinda YA feeling. Dragons in Napoleon era naval wars.
The Power by Naomi Alderman was good
Gabriel by Garth Nix and it's sequels
The Golden Compass, although after reading she may try to attack and dethrone God
"I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."
Donkey KongPutting Nintendo out of business with AI nipsRegistered Userregular
Also when looking down on YA novels, remember how many of us watched and liked Power Rangers. That show was insane for the first season or two. They just filmed some underwritten Nickelodeon slapstick teen high bullshit with the lowest paid actors they could find, and spliced it with an unrelated japansese sentai show.
It rarely made sense. Each episode was essentially a shitpost.
Thousands of hot, local singles are waiting to play at bubbulon.com.
Why would you watch Power Rangers when you could watch Beetleborgs.
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AthenorBattle Hardened OptimistThe Skies of HiigaraRegistered Userregular
I've got 4 more levels to go through before I consider myself 100% cleared on Doom 2016. Not really gonna touch the multiplayer, might grab the snapmap low hanging fruit.
I tell you, you feel like an unbelievable killing machine at the end of the game. Just being able to lay down infinite ammo on the cyberdemon is soooo so satisfying. especially when using the mobile turret or the siege cannon.
I think the first Pern book with dragons fucking is what led me down a path of darkness as a kid
Those sexy, sexy, entwined dragons
I also read Applegate's very horny norse themed YA series Everworld after I ran out of Animorphs which I suspect were dropped by Scholastic for being too horny
Also when looking down on YA novels, remember how many of us watched and liked Power Rangers. That show was insane for the first season or two. They just filmed some underwritten Nickelodeon slapstick teen high bullshit with the lowest paid actors they could find, and spliced it with an unrelated japansese sentai show.
It rarely made sense. Each episode was essentially a shitpost.
I mean our cartoons were basically moving pictures to sell toys.
GenX got the worst of it and millenials got marginally better cartoons but it was all bought the maximum dollar value of our time except the commercials were worth more than the cartions which gave some creative freedom.
Also when looking down on YA novels, remember how many of us watched and liked Power Rangers. That show was insane for the first season or two. They just filmed some underwritten Nickelodeon slapstick teen high bullshit with the lowest paid actors they could find, and spliced it with an unrelated japansese sentai show.
It rarely made sense. Each episode was essentially a shitpost.
And yet, if Saban showed the original sentai show dubbed here in America, it would have been a huge flop. I am 101% certain American kids would only accept Jason, Billy, Trini, Zack, and Kimberly.
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
Also when looking down on YA novels, remember how many of us watched and liked Power Rangers. That show was insane for the first season or two. They just filmed some underwritten Nickelodeon slapstick teen high bullshit with the lowest paid actors they could find, and spliced it with an unrelated japansese sentai show.
It rarely made sense. Each episode was essentially a shitpost.
Wait, was it really this bad? I need to go find these too watch.
"I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."
I'm the last person to take issue with people for enjoying unspectacular art. I have read and watched some truly unimpressive stuff and will continue to do so. The thing is to remain critical of it when it's relevant to do so, like when introducing it to less critical young minds or when paying the bills of someone who is actively harmful.
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SummaryJudgmentGrab the hottest iron you can find, stride in the Tower’s front doorRegistered Userregular
I think the first Pern book with dragons fucking is what led me down a path of darkness as a kid
Those sexy, sexy, entwined dragons
I also read Applegate's very horny norse themed YA series Everworld after I ran out of Animorphs which I suspect were dropped by Scholastic for being too horny
I remember when, as a middle schooler, I had a big WTF moment in the library when I realized that there was dragon sex AND rider sex going on in the same paragraph.
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BrodyThe WatchThe First ShoreRegistered Userregular
Oh, I just finished The Lightbringer series, and man does it go from a decent series of novels to a load of garbage in like, 3 chapters, all at the end.
"I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."
Posts
I mean colleges have terrible writing standards anyways.
it is definitely wordy in an unhelpful way, but i also wonder if there's a specific name or w/e i can use instead of just like "i didn't like this when i read it, less of this"
awkwardly I am expected to teach basic composition despite my degree being in IDEAS and having no functional grasp of language
I mean they aren't Tolkien, but they aren't bad for what they are. YA escapist fantasy,
Ordering the series based on this alone.
My kid needs and loves books as long as there is more than a screen. She is reading through the other books by Percy Jacksons author and the Bones Kathy Reichs YA series. So this will be good next.
Then probably Hunger Games cause she is borderline.
It's weird being aware and controlling media when my own parents were like 'fuck it, whatever'.
My only media restriction was my sister and I dhouldnt watch Married With Children when my dad took naps. But we did anyway.
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain
She uses language poorly. Like, her actual sentences are what I'm talking about.
The story is bad, too, but I mean her actual mastery of the English language is not super great.
Long, long ago, I tried to give Harry Potter a shot, and the writing quality itself turned me off *hard*.
The setting was always nonsense, but I would only learn just how bad the story was years and years later, and I don't know it very well.
But the writing was just notably bad. And my standards aren't that dang high! I was reading D&D novels and the like at the time.
I understand that "one" refers to "quality life" however only from context and after reading the sentence a few times.
So... yeah, it bad
I cant think of a better description of me from 10 to 16-18.
I was embarrassed when we donated my teenage ;book collection. So much old man fiction and garbage sci-fi bought because the book cover looked interesting at Barnes and Noble.
Luckily I donated it years ago so the only shame I carry within myself.
But there are a lot of novels that have been labeled YA recently, in the hopes that those books might sell better. In the "genre is a fiction pushed by publishing companies to sell things", YA is literally a genre created by publishing companies to sell books.
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain
Then there was the strong female lead who fell into a dumbass "which boy do i love" subplot that ate up a huge amount of all the books and could not have been less interesting.
It had the makings of a more interesting story but the author wasn't interested and the audience wasn't interested.
Hmmm. I think "too wordy" is perfectly descriptive but doesn't really help a weak student who hasn't seen enough examples to identify and fix the issue on their own.
Purdue's Writing Lab (my main resource back when) headlines their advice on this particular issue with "eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers" which seems useless to tell someone who doesnt have a sense for wordiness, but they describe the idea clearly and do give some good examples. I know you're not looking for five magic words to describe it so it clicks, not sure why I'm bashing that description. Anyway.
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/academic_writing/conciseness/eliminating_words.html
Not going to defend any of those.
*as far as I know
-Indiana Solo, runner of blades
I couldn't get into it.
First one I can get MSRP without jumping through hoops.
I really don't care about the marginal differences, I'm just not driving to Madison Heights at 2 in the morning or fighting bots or paying reseller premiums.
As I recall, it got worse the more I read it. Panties became way too much of a focal point.
The Hobbit and LotR are probably good.
The first couple Dragonlance novels are likely good at that age.
I think I started Wheel of Time around then, but iirc Robert Jordan is one of those people who relies on sex crimes to make bad people feel more bad.
The Temeraire series by Naomi Novik is kinda YA feeling. Dragons in Napoleon era naval wars.
The Power by Naomi Alderman was good
Gabriel by Garth Nix and it's sequels
The Golden Compass, although after reading she may try to attack and dethrone God
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain
It rarely made sense. Each episode was essentially a shitpost.
I tell you, you feel like an unbelievable killing machine at the end of the game. Just being able to lay down infinite ammo on the cyberdemon is soooo so satisfying. especially when using the mobile turret or the siege cannon.
Those sexy, sexy, entwined dragons
I also read Applegate's very horny norse themed YA series Everworld after I ran out of Animorphs which I suspect were dropped by Scholastic for being too horny
I mean our cartoons were basically moving pictures to sell toys.
GenX got the worst of it and millenials got marginally better cartoons but it was all bought the maximum dollar value of our time except the commercials were worth more than the cartions which gave some creative freedom.
And yet, if Saban showed the original sentai show dubbed here in America, it would have been a huge flop. I am 101% certain American kids would only accept Jason, Billy, Trini, Zack, and Kimberly.
Wait, was it really this bad? I need to go find these too watch.
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain
Now VR Troopers? That was cool on TV20.
*spins chair around backwards*
The Bible?
God damn
I was about to come in here and post about that and you beat me to it
Was it a Michigan thing, Canadian TV coming over like Degrassi?
Yes, Bible Man is a fine Power Rangers knock-off.
... wait, what are we talking about?
I remember when, as a middle schooler, I had a big WTF moment in the library when I realized that there was dragon sex AND rider sex going on in the same paragraph.
The Monster Baru Cormorant - Seth Dickinson
Steam: Korvalain