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I Really Hope the [Kids] are alright

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  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    We did pumped breastmilk via bottles from a very early point. Don't recall exactly how soon, but very young. Latching itself was always a pain...

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  • FishmanFishman Put your goddamned hand in the goddamned Box of Pain. Registered User regular
    This morning I convinced my notoriously contrary 4 year old to wear his Moose sweatshirt by telling him (and I'd like to make it clear that every part of this statement is true) that I had a dream that I saw Paul Rudd wearing the same shirt on TV while playing guitar with a band.

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  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Owen is incredibly picky about pants.

    He owns at least a dozen pairs of pants but will only wear 3 of them.

  • plufimplufim Dr Registered User regular
    My wife had a breast reduction years ago, so her milk production was limited. We wanted both boys to get to 1 on breast milk if possible, and we were super lucky that there was an active "human milk for human babies" community, so we had a lot of donated breast milk. Our first was on formula as well, and we found hoat milk formula was best, as he got reflux from other formula. Our second made it to 1 on breast milk, and then we used goat milk, but he was off the bottle pretty quick.

    We don't judge anyone for what they choose to feed their babies of course. This was a tough time, had days where I drove hours just to get a few bottles of extra milk.

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  • RanlinRanlin Oh gosh Registered User regular
    kime wrote: »
    We did pumped breastmilk via bottles from a very early point. Don't recall exactly how soon, but very young. Latching itself was always a pain...

    Even if you don't have to I highly recommend doing pumped bottle feeding at least some of the time so you both can do feeding times. I ended up doing all the actual feedings unless I was asleep because we had to exclusively pump/use formula. I really appreciated getting to do it and her not having to worry about it.

  • plufimplufim Dr Registered User regular
    Since we also used pumped milk, I got to feed the bubs as well, and yeah, those were profound bonding moments.

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  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Ecco honestly did almost all of the night feeds. He's a much lighter sleeper than I am. and he functions a lot better mentally on less sleep.

    I wouldn't have made it without him. Like. at all.

  • ProlegomenaProlegomena Frictionless Spinning The VoidRegistered User regular
    Aioua wrote: »
    good thing she's so gosh darn cute

    Yeah it definitely allows them to get away with a lot.

  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    edited October 2020
    Poop! Finally! After a dry spell for days three and four.

    Never been so happy to see it.

    Also had first check-in with dr, still the same weight as when she left the hospital which is good, everything else good, no concerns.

    Ok ok ok I'm not killing my baby yet.

    Aioua on
    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    Oh also a shout-out to @Brody who handed us down their old infant car seat that snaps into the base in the car. Makes everything so much easier with a squidgy infant who's both unable to control her limbs and surprisingly strong.

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    It's not unusual for baby to not poop every day.

    I think I was told up to seven days?

    You're going to panic about it anyway! But baby should be ok.

  • honoverehonovere Registered User regular
    Yeah, we were told the first few weeks especially and the meconium at the start might be anything between several times a day or up to a week.

  • Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    My 2-year old nephew tricked me into handling his poop

  • Captain InertiaCaptain Inertia Registered User regular
    He asked for help washing his hands and then pointed to what I thought was the offending pile of wet dog food

    I learned a moment later from his parents that he likes digging the poop out of his diaper

  • CroakerBCCroakerBC TorontoRegistered User regular
    honovere wrote: »
    Yeah, we were told the first few weeks especially and the meconium at the start might be anything between several times a day or up to a week.

    At five weeks, the longest we’ve had without poop so far has been*checks notes* five days, and I’m not sure which of us was more relieved when containment breached, him or us. Apparently it’s normal, as long as they’re gaining weight, but we were asked to flag it with our doctor if it got as far as a week.

    Stuff you can do: baby bicycles - our lad hated these, and having his knees pushed up toward his chest, but it shifted a lot of gas out of him. Apparently rubbing/massaging various bits of their stomach and one side encourages stuff to move down.

    And if you’re me, and you’re mixing formula the second week on very little sleep, remember to read the instructions for what they say, not what you think they say, and put the water in before adding the specified amount of powder. Otherwise you don’t add enough water, the formula is thicker, the ensuing poop is thicker, and thus harder to pass.

    Amazing how quickly I’ve started finding joy in discussing baby poop.

  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    And if the baby bicycles, tummy rubs, and all other things don't work and your getting frantic, you can attempt to gently check baby's temperature with a rectal thermometer. They will be very unhappy about it, but the two times that I resorted to doing so with Ellie, she very much rage pooped in my general direction. Luckily it was into the clean diaper she was laying on.

  • VivixenneVivixenne Remember your training, and we'll get through this just fine. Registered User regular
    edited October 2020
    Aioua wrote: »
    oh hey guys my daughter was born back on Saturday

    just chiming in here at 4am to say fuck breastfeeding none of this is any kind of sane or fair
    just lets stress out because milk isn't coming fast enough, the kid can't seem to get it even if it's there, my wife is already in enough pain but here's some bonus pain for you, and the little I can do to help seems nowhere near enough

    so tired and I've never wanted to see poop and pee filled diapers so badly

    CONGRATULATIONS! She looks SO CUTE, I love her, oh my gosh.

    I have some words to share re: the breastfeeding journey. They are spoilered based on stage - I hope you and your wife can derive some reassurance from it!

    THE BEGINNING (0-6 weeks)
    I was never sure I was going to be able to breastfeed. I have the sort of personality that assumes "the worst" in an effort to prepare for it, though not being able to breastfeed was never gonna be "the worst", just a possibility for which I was attempting to prepare myself. My supply came in like, the second our baby was born. My boobs were like, GINORMOUS and almost immediately rock-hard and uncomfortable, which of course is exactly what you need when you're also recovering from a third-degree episiotomy and the overall physiological wreckage that constitutes childbirth. So we gave breastfeeding a go - it seemed a shame to waste such a good supply, after all.

    Man, even with a great supply, those early days were fucking HARD. You're in constant physical discomfort, you're struggling to sleep, and now you're fixated on being able to adequately feed the life you just birthed into the world. I remember obsessing incessantly over her latch - I CANNOT SEE INTO MY BOOB OR INTO HER MOUTH SO WHO KNOWS WHAT IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING?! Oh, and remember to get them to latch properly while you are in so much discomfort that you can't actually sit or lie down comfortably! Oh, and hold that position for anywhere between 10 and 30 minutes PER SIDE! L. M. F. A. O.

    Basically any time there was a nurse on hand while I was trying to feed, they were pulled to my side to offer whatever advice they could. It all varied, but I was opting for a scattergun approach - give me all your advice, and surely SOMETHING is going to stick.

    Add to that the persistent discomfort of shredded nipples and over-full boobs, fears of mastitis and maintaining supply... it was legit no fun at all. I almost envied the formula feeders for this reason. Oh, and I was also pumping after each feed to build my supply, which is its own sort of hell, but at least at this time I had people around to help so they could take her and burp her while I strapped myself into the milking machine.

    But then, maybe two weeks after she was born, things started to click. It was steadily getting better even prior to that, but I really noticed an improvement after that point. And then, when she was 6 weeks old? Oh my god, it was like a light went off for both of us - she was latching with no issue, my nipples had gotten used to the assault, and my boobs were beginning to regulate supply. The relief was next level.

    Something that definitely helped was that from the moment I was able to express enough milk, my husband was offering her a feed via bottle at around 10:00 pm. This let me go to bed at 8:00 pm, he feeds her at 10-11, and I get a decent chunk of sleep before the next feed (around 1 am, so a good 5 hours). It also gave Blake the opportunity to feed her as well as for her to learn how to use a bottle. She took to it with no issues.

    THE MIDDLE (up to 9 months)
    I really struggled to breastfeed in public - at first it was my own modesty and anxiety around doing this in public, but later (from about the 4 month mark), it was her getting increasingly distracted when feeding. There is nothing quite like a baby suddenly twisting herself off the boob to stare at something that caught her eye. This meant that we kind of planned our day around her feeds, which was a bit rough when she was still feeding every 2 hours. It got much easier when I was able to space her feeds out to 3 hourly.

    The feeds themselves, when done at home, were very quick and very efficient. From about 3 months on she only took 10 minutes to get a full feed per side, and from 6 months it's been less than 5 minutes a side. She knew what to expect, I knew what to expect - honestly, this was the best part of breastfeeding for me. It was so easy - baby hungry? Boob. She was still getting a bottle of expressed milk a day from Blake, but otherwise it was just me and her. I kinda loved it, to be honest. I wasn't expecting to, but I really did. When she looked up at me while feeding for the first time and smiled? Yeah, that's an image that I want to burn into my brain forever, I loved it.

    I was only committed to breastfeeding to 6 months, but I decided to keep going because it was working. She was gaining weight really well, was barely ever sick... I had no reason at that stage to stop. We were also lucky enough that she stopped feeding overnight from about 4 months old, so after the dream feed from Blake at 10-11 pm, she didn't need anything until the morning. That made things easier for us as well.

    THE NOW (9 months old)
    So, lemme tell you about teeth - the squeamish will NOT want to read what follows.

    My precious demon child started getting her first tooth at around 7 months old (almost to the day). The second followed shortly thereafter. These were not an issue at all - they're her bottom teeth and they're typically under her tongue when she is nursing.

    Then, my precious demon child decided to get 4 TEETH almost all at once - her top 4 middle ones basically came in quick succession and are still, now, in the process of coming down. This has really thrown a wrench into our breastfeeding, because she bites me at almost every single feed.

    Plenty of babies don't bite. Mine, however, did and does. She broke the skin with those sharp af teeth, which then continue to dig into that sore spot on subsequent feeds. She reopens whatever healing I'm able to achieve overnight. It fucking SUCKS.

    I'm also due back at work in 6 weeks. I have to make a choice between starting mixed feeding NOW (to give my boobs a break and thus supplementing with formula), starting mixed feeding SOON (so that I can send formula to daycare and just breastfeed at the start/end of the day), or weaning all together (either onto formula or cow's milk). I won't have an opportunity to pump regularly at work, certainly not to the point where I get enough to give her bottles for the days I'm at work (plus the pump pulls on the sore spot and is suuuuper painful to use), so those really are my only options. So I'm at a complete loss as to what to do, because I don't want to stop breastfeeding right now (I worked so damn hard to get this far, dammit), but I also don't see this as sustainable given the continued biting and my limited success in addressing the problem.

    Also - I almost broke down in tears the other day because I had no idea how to prepare a bottle of formula or how to travel with it, because we've never had to do that before! ARGH! What am I supposed to do?!

    I'm booked in to see a lactation consultant next week so I'm not making any big calls until then (provided I can handle the pain of feeding until then... luckily for us it's tolerable on one side so she can at least be fed from there while I limit feeds on the injured side). I do have a tin of formula that I panic-bought last week because she went on a nursing strike for about 12 hours (it hurts so much when she bites that I scare her with my reaction, then she can feel my stress, which is just not good for either of us, so she decided it was easier not to feed... understandable really but not sustainable, obviously) that really freaked me out. We eventually broke that by giving her a cup with some breastmilk that I hand-expressed, then she agreed to feed from me again. But yeah, the formula is there, we have the bottles, we have the stuff. I just need someone to reassure me that this is the right call, because even though I wasn't originally planning on breastfeeding for this long, well, I have, and now I'm going to miss it.

    So to sum up, as your journey continues... there are highs and there are lows. I am sending solidarity and love to all of you. If you're able to breastfeed at all, for any amount of time, is great. If you use formula instead, that's ALSO great, because your baby is fed (and your boobs are spared)!

    Vivixenne on
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  • VivixenneVivixenne Remember your training, and we'll get through this just fine. Registered User regular
    It's not unusual for baby to not poop every day.

    I think I was told up to seven days?

    You're going to panic about it anyway! But baby should be ok.

    Yeah. God I miss those not-pooping-everyday days.

    XBOX: NOVADELPHINI | DISCORD: NOVADELPHINI #7387 | TWITTER
  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    Ellie is now practicing to not need to use the baby seat when she sits in the potty.

    I'm going to rejoice so. Hard. When that thing is gone.

  • DisruptedCapitalistDisruptedCapitalist I swear! Registered User regular
    Now if only my 8-year-old would just remember to flush...!

    "Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    17 month old is obsessed with my wife's boobs.

    She stopped breast feeding about 7 months ago but recently he's taken to lifting up her top and giving them a squeeze.

    At least he hasn't done it in public yet, apparently it's quite normal...

  • PantsBPantsB Fake Thomas Jefferson Registered User regular
    Ecco honestly did almost all of the night feeds. He's a much lighter sleeper than I am. and he functions a lot better mentally on less sleep.

    I wouldn't have made it without him. Like. at all.

    That was how we did it as well

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  • PantsBPantsB Fake Thomas Jefferson Registered User regular
    Pretty happy with how the costume/pictures came out

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  • AiouaAioua Ora Occidens Ora OptimaRegistered User regular
    @Vivixenne thanks for sharing!

    we're already seeing improvement, just need the nipples to catch up and heal

    life's a game that you're bound to lose / like using a hammer to pound in screws
    fuck up once and you break your thumb / if you're happy at all then you're god damn dumb
    that's right we're on a fucked up cruise / God is dead but at least we have booze
    bad things happen, no one knows why / the sun burns out and everyone dies
  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    edited October 2020
    So my son for the past few months has puked about an hour or so after being put down for bedtime. This doesn't happen everyday but happens probably about two thirds of the time.

    He'll wake up, start coughing then puke.

    We changed his milk to oat milk which made no difference.

    We stopped giving him milk before bedtime which made no difference.

    Him having a snack seems to make no difference. Sometimes he eats after nursery and is fine other times he pukes at the usual time.

    He does always have a cough and we'll be going to the doctor's next week but has anyone else had a similar issue? His cough is worse when he sleeps.

    He's 17 months old.

    He was prescribed some stuff for reflux months ago, I'm going to try that again too.

    SharpyVII on
  • kimekime Queen of Blades Registered User regular
    Have you tried having the bed at a slight incline (with the head on the higher side)? We did that when our daughter was having issues when she was significantly younger, but I imagine it would still be helpful at 17 months. It's kind of a lifelong helpful thing :D

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  • MichaelLCMichaelLC In what furnace was thy brain? ChicagoRegistered User regular
    We just rolled up a towel or something and or it under the mattress. There are wedges you can buy as well.

  • plufimplufim Dr Registered User regular
    ealztzokqt18.jpg
    Please ignore the mess

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  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    What mess?
    toys have a tendency to sprawl over the floor here as well. Just 10 mins is enough.

  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    We have survived the Halloween party. Twelve kids from six years to six months. Pinata. So much food.

    So much noise.

    My heart is full.

  • discriderdiscrider Registered User regular
    edited October 2020
    Bluey's new episode 'Circus' has come out on this, Queensland's state election day.
    Depressingly cynical but probably accurate

    Looks like the party that led the COVID lockdowns/border lockdowns in the state will be returned to power.

    discrider on
  • MulysaSemproniusMulysaSempronius but also susie nyRegistered User regular
    Outdoor Halloween party with friends my 6 year old has had her while life. I was cold and miserable, so I tried to stay to the side to let my kids just go and have fun. And they did. Lots of candy was gotten, too

    If that's all there is my friends, then let's keep dancing
  • BrodyBrody The Watch The First ShoreRegistered User regular
    Sapling loves m&ms, so I just hid a bunch of fun sized bags around the house. We were planning on going to a friend's, but one of them had to fly last weekend, so we figured it's probably best to stay home.

    "I will write your name in the ruin of them. I will paint you across history in the color of their blood."

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  • MNC DoverMNC Dover Full-time Voice Actor Kirkland, WARegistered User regular
    edited November 2020
    My son at 2.5 has hit the terrible twos in stride. Like, he's getting loud, standoffish, and cries when he doesn't get his way. But the worst, THE WORST, thing is he's refusing to go to sleep. He used to be a sleeping angel. Put him in bed, kiss on the cheek, and he'd be out in minutes. The last week or two it's been fighting, screaming, crying, to get to bed and then waking up way earlier at like 5-7am.

    Please let this shit pass quickly. It's been hard on me.

    Edit: and I'm up at 5am again! During the week, I can at least get in a nap after everyone is out of the house, but being a Sunday, I won't get that opportunity. Gonna be a long day...

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  • SolventSolvent Econ-artist กรุงเทพมหานครRegistered User regular
    Child no. 2 is now at the 'climb on the chairs and attempt to get on the dining table whenever an adult turns their back' stage.

    Which is terrifying, because my daughter's experiments when she was this age resulted in medevac and a week in hospital.

    I don't know where he got the scorpions, or how he got them into my mattress.

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  • DaMoonRulzDaMoonRulz Mare ImbriumRegistered User regular
    Today's theme music for playtime:

    https://youtu.be/eYHFSXp1mH4

    3basnids3lf9.jpg




  • SharpyVIISharpyVII Registered User regular
    I'm ashamed to say it but I'm not really enjoying being a parent at the moment :(

  • mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    SharpyVII wrote: »
    I'm ashamed to say it but I'm not really enjoying being a parent at the moment :(

    My wife's sick; the two year old is incredibly two right now (a highlight- he spit in my face Roberto Alomar-style this morning when I went to change the diaper); the five year old needs redirected (on average) *every five seconds* to pay attention to his remote learning, and stop hanging from his chair backwards or making cat sounds; and the nine year old has been claiming to be done with his school work, while turning in blank assignments so he can go watch screens, again. Also, the puppy destroyed the recycle lid, and now periodically gets bored and empties the can all over the yard (we requested a new can from the HOA six months ago now)

    They boys have also all been physically fighting and injuring each other when we do send them outside or downstairs to get a damn break for five seconds. And then I finally found a coping tool I could do, something that I enjoy that's just mine (writing)...and they absolutely fucking hate it. The amount the negative attention seeking behaviors all go up when I stop to do something that's a personal hobby and not "constantly live to meet needs" feels like downright planned sabotage. And this was all after a, "things are hard and we're gonna need to everyone to pull their weight right now"-meeting, which they apparently heard as, "What's that? Make all of this much much harder? Absolutely!"

  • lonelyahavalonelyahava Call me Ahava ~~She/Her~~ Move to New ZealandRegistered User regular
    SharpyVII wrote: »
    I'm ashamed to say it but I'm not really enjoying being a parent at the moment :(

    Feel no shame at all, friend. It's a hard never ending slog at the best of times, and these are not the best of times.

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular

    There have been many, MANY times I’ve thought to myself, “What the fuck was I thinking?”

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