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[Mini-Phalla]No-ThemePost-RestrictionUPickNo-PMMini-Phalla Game Over, Evil Wins

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    thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Unless the forums happen to go down in the next 30 minutes, the vote will close on time.

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
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    DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Where is Shamus? For that matter, where is everybody?

    Will I fail in my obligation to try and steer the village away from a disastrous choice? How can I not?

    Can we not look instead to the infamous PrecisionK? How can he justify brazenly voting for the seer among other outrageous choices? Has his behavior been the lest bit helpful? Does he have huge enough balls to blatantly act like a mafioso?

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
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    EgosEgos Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    B:L wrote: »
    I want you to go in that house, and find my body.
    Which one is it?
    It's the one that says Bad Motherfucker

    Oh goddamnit, Marx
    You got me killed yet again
    You son of a bitch.

    OoOoOooooOooo


    B:L it must feel good to know that you have fans. The young-uns adore you :mrgreen: .

    Egos on
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    EgosEgos Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    At this moment its a bit hard to tell, it seems likely of those remaining Frost is innocent(by voting Var-but I could be wrong) and maybe Shamus (Locus trusted him). Psycholarry's restriction seems too subtle to be a lie- I suppose I'll !precisionk with the hopes his brashness is a front.

    Egos on
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    ShamusShamus Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I do believe..a tie seems right.

    Egos!

    I wasn't around today due to work, mostly involving me saving the world once more.

    Shamus on
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    FrostMistFrostMist NorwayRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    !Egos is the one that must die, because I've been doing other things for too long and time slipped by, also

    FrostMist on
    Untitled-1.jpg
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    thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Day Four

    At this point, the few survivors gathered together to try to figure out what to do. "I [tiny]think[/tiny] we should listen to me," precisionk aka The Night Stalker began, but two people slit his throat before he could tell the rest what to do.

    Iskaral Pust, High Priest of the Tesem Temple of Shadow, more commonly known as Shamus, spoke up. "I wonder, do the others think I'm crazy? I don't know, they might. It's important that I ask them this soon, because if they think I'm crazy, there's a chance they will turn on me. I will ask them tomorrow."

    The babbling came to an end when one of the remaining villains rammed a sword-gun through his heart and then fired it.

    "So we meet at last <grins madly>!" intoned the generic villain, The Crimson Ghost. "I have been waiting for you <giggles>. <reveal of villainous plan> and furthermore <incorrect guess at superhero's secret identity>!"

    The survivors, bewildered at this madman's speech, waited for something to happen.

    "I know you have some Cyclotrode X, whatever the fuck <spits> that is, and I intend to take it! <mean face> By force, if necessary! <stupid pun catchphrase>. My <villainous superweapon> I told you about before in my <villainous plan> plan is almost charged <gestures dramatically>! In another <dramatic but not so long as to be boring period of time> you will all be dead, and the Cyclotrode X, whatever the fuck <spits> that is, will be mine!"

    "Dude, are you high? (And would you like to get higher with me? :winky:)" asked Bill Lee.

    "On the contrary, good citizen! I simply seek to <villainous goal which sounds deep at first but makes no sense if you actually think about it> before I kill each and every one of you. <dramatic farewell>"

    Egos pulled off his mask. He fired his superweapon. Bill Lee, who often went under the pen name PsychoLarry, was instantaneously incinerated in an insidious inferno of alliteration.

    The remaining survivor, grizzled John "FrostMist" Smith from the A-team (but now retired), barely escaped the fiery words. Running as fast as his old legs would take him, he ducked into a small gift shop, one of the few buildings still standing in Phalla. The shopkeeper, one Mr. Doran, looked up as the bell tinkled. "What can I do for you, John? Do you want something for your girlfriend, perhaps? No charge this time. Think of it as my gift to you. Perhaps you'd like something for your child? You know, I never had a childhood. I had one, but everybody made fun of me. I tried to get my name changed, but apparently the judge was also named "Gift" in some other language, and refused it. I have been DevoutlyApathetic for years, now, on my mission to kill you all, but the judge wouldn't let me change my name to something so normal. Yes, kill you all. Think of it as my gift to you. My final gift."

    Dead
    precisionk - The Night Stalker (From an action movie.)
    Shamus - Iskaral Pust (He may be dead, but he's still crazy.)
    Psycholarry - Bill Lee (Killed in endgame. Some famous author.)
    FrostMist - John "Hannibal" Smith (Killed in endgame. Almost as cool as Samuel L. Jackson.)

    Winners
    DevoutlyApathetic - Doran (Means gift in a language other than English.)
    Egos - The Crimson Ghost (<witty description of a generic villain>)
    Varcayn - Hank Scorpio (Death is just a small obstacle for a supervillain like Scorpio.)

    Evil is victorious! (but you're all winners for playing)

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
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    DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I have a
    gift.jpg

    for all of you. Though it's especially for Kratalightblade, Oatway, Frostmist and especially PsychoLarry and PrecisionK. Thanks guys, we couldn't have done it without you!
    The present is being my slave eternally.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
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    P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Yeah, not entirely unexpected.

    P10 on
    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
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    thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    *****MAFIA****
    Egos - The Crimson Ghost
    One day, while busily searching for the Cyclotrode X, whatever the fuck that is, you were harassed by some citizens of Phalla while in your <insert generic villain vehicle>. Well, you couldn't let that stand. You're the Crismon Ghost, damn it! Maybe they thought you were some other generic cloaked villain. The word villain is used loosely there, because you're actually working with the good guys on this one. After all, you hate 5 AM prank phone calls as much as the next guy. As you always say, "<insert generic villainous statement about good and evil being the same>"

    Or so you want people to think. In reality, you never gave up your evil ways after <insert generic villainous event>, and all you've ever wanted to do since then is kill every single person in Phalla. Except for <insert generic love interest>, because she is really hot.

    Every day, you and your buddies, DevoutlyApathetic and Varcayn should send me the name of a person to kill. You three are the only people exempt from the "no outside contact" rule, and you are the only three without post restrictions.

    Witty Restriction Description: Come up with your own damn post restriction, you lazy sack of insolence. Better make it good, too, because the others will be watching closely. PM me your description of it by the end of the first day.

    DA - Gift (Doron)
    You were always the favorite child in your family, almost as if you were some sort of gift of the gods. Your name means gift, in fact. Doron, though your friends all call you Dor and your enemies call you Doron the Moron. And what a gift you are. You made all the right connections, made all the right moves, and now look at you. You're the king, baby. Everybody in Phalla knows your name. But that made you a big target. After losing a house to arson, you have a bone to pick with those responsible. Multiple bones to pick. You're going to pick their bones dry. It will be your gift to them.

    Or so you want people to think. In reality, you are orchestrating the whole thing. You burnt down your own house, because you are so damn rich it was just a blip on your yearly tax returns. You want to spread the terror you felt as a child as a result of your strange name across the world. It will be your gift to them.

    Every day, you and your buddies, Egos and Varcayn should send me the name of a person to kill. You three are the only people exempt from the "no outside contact" rule, and you are the only three without post restrictions.

    Witty Restriction Description: Come up with your own damn post restriction, you lazy sack of insolence. Better make it good, too, because the others will be watching closely. PM me your description of it by the end of the first day.

    Varcayn - Hank Scorpio
    You need no introducing. Everybody knows and fears the name of Hank Scorpio. Your latest move, trying to take over an entire coast, was a complete success, until the army arrived and nuked half of your cities. Though now that you think of it, that will make them think twice before messing with you. Anyways, you fled to the village of Phalla, where you hope to fit right in with the other weirdos. You've turned a new leaf. It's time to stop the terror and powermongering and start cultivating a very beautiful garden. But some assholes have been stealing your mushrooms, so it's time to make them pay. You've always been a charismatic one, so it shouldn't be too hard to get the other villagers to help deal you with those responsible.

    Or so you want people to think. In reality, you are up to your old tricks. Destroying Phalla is the first step in your plan to take over the world in a way only the brilliant Hank Scorpio could devise.

    Every day, you and your buddies, Egos and DevoutlyApathetic should send me the name of a person to kill. You three are the only people exempt from the "no outside contact" rule, and you are the only three without post restrictions.

    Witty Restriction Description: Come up with your own damn post restriction, you lazy sack of insolence. Better make it good, too, because the others will be watching closely. PM me your description of it by the end of the first day.

    *****SPECIALS*****
    Aroduc - the superhero crime fighter/mood swinging Bipolar Bear then
    You are Bipolar Bear, a superhero fighting crime every day you can work up the courage to get out of bed, which these days is really, really hard. When you aren't cowering in a corner, you like to read a good book. On weekends you generally kick the asses of every villain in town. Your bravery is renowned. But then your depression returns. You should probably be taking some medication, but that would interfere with the RAW POWER THAT IS THE BIPOLAR BEAR WOOO so very depressed Bear.

    When you aren't sobbing miserably in your closet, you protect people. Every day, PM me the name of one person to protect. You are too depressed to work up the courage to protect yourself, though, and you can't protect people from a mob, so you're really only effective against attacks from the three ruffians in town.

    Emotive: Every one of your posts must contain no less than three emoticons. :):lol: :whistle:

    Locus - Iroquois Confederacy aka the League of Peace and Power aka the Five Nations aka the Six Nations aka the People of the Longhouse
    You have many names, but most people call you the Iroquois Confederacy. You consist of six tribes, though the last was not an original member:
    Seneca, the "People of the Great Hill"
    Cayuga, the "People of the Great Swamp"
    Onondaga, the "People of the Hills"
    Oneida, the "People of Upright Stone"
    Mohawk, the "People of the Great Flint"
    Tuscarora1, the "Shirt-Wearing People"
    After the devestation of the American Revolution, which saw members of the confederacy fighting on both sides, you moved your headquarters to Phalla, a small village, to try to patch things up. Unfortunately, you have been harassed by certain anonymous villagers, and you need to deal with them before you can heal the wounds of war.

    But your large organization and knowledge of the land gives you an advantage over the others. Every day, send me the name of another player. You will find out whether or not they want to kill you and the other upstanding citizens of Phalla.

    Self-absorbed: Every sentence you post must begin with the word I, my, or any clause which makes it clear that you are the important one here, not the person you're talking about.

    *****VILLAGERS*****
    FrostMist - John "Hannibal" Smith from the A-team
    "In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team." You used to believe in your mission, but leading the A-team for all these years has been tough on you. When the ratings drop and show cancellation put an end to your beloved team, you moved to Phalla, hoping to live the rest of your fugitive life in Phalla. You picked the wrong village, sir.

    Run-on Sentence: Your posts are one long sentence which never ends, even after you click the submit button, meaning you should try to be grammatically correct, but never end the first sentence you start, and never ever using a period, and also

    PsychoLarry - Bill Lee (William S. Burroughs) aka a Fight between the Movie and book versions of Naked Lunch
    You are "an American novelist, essayist, social critic, painter and spoken word performer." Your addiction to opium influenced you heavily, especially in your later life. But none of that means anything any more. It's time to take a stand against these bastards. You don't know who is in charge of the mafia in the quiet village of Phalla, but you'll be damned if you're going to let them bully someone as famous as you. But not knowing who they are could be a problem, so it would be best to be careful. After all, someone really cool once said "A paranoid is someone who knows a little of what's going on."

    Suggestive: Turn ordinary ideas into something so much more. Wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more, say no more.

    PRËTËNTIÖüS - Samuel L. Jackson
    Ezekiel 25:17. 'The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyrannies of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepards the weak through the valley of darkness. For he is truly his brothers' keeper and finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the lord when I lay my vengeance upon you.' Now you've been saying that shit for years, and if someone ever heard it, it meant their ass. You never gave much thought to what it meant, you just thought it was a cold blooded thing to say to a mother fucker before you popped a cap in his ass. But things have changed since you moved to Phalla: now that you know what it means, you figure it's time to bring the fight to these fuckers.

    Indecisive: Your vote only counts if you had previously been voting for three different people that day. Since a game is automatically over if there are less than three people, you will always be able to have your vote count.

    Shamus - Iskaral Pust, High Priest of the Tesem Temple of Shadow.
    I'm not even sure if I'm crazy. I might be. But that's hardly important. I may be a High Priest, but I'm not afraid to use my power. That much is certainly important. I wonder if the others think I'm crazy? I don't care. It would just be useful information for me to know, because it would change how I would have to deal with them. I want to kill the infidels in the small village of Phalla, to be sure, but if I were crazy, then maybe I would want something different. But I'm not. Crazy. Not crazy.

    Restrictive: You must include some bold, italicize, and underline text in every one of your posts. If you have this post restriction, you are required to PM me a name every night. You exchange post restrictions with that player. If you don't send a name, the next person on the player list will be chosen automatically.

    Oatway - B:L
    You are motherfuckin' B:L. Everybody in Phalla knows who you are, and they know you mean business. Unfortunately, they usually think you are acting suspiciously, even if you usually have their best interests in mind. Whatever. This makes you the god damned Batman of Phalla, though you certainly die a lot more than Batman does. More of the Goltana Knight of Phalla. Either way, it's time to bring the fight to the evil elements of this fair village. For the 7,000,000th time.

    Potentially Suicidal: Your posts must either rhyme or be haiku.

    precisionk - The Night Stalker (from Cobra)
    Since nobody has ever heard of the Night Stalker, you just tell them you're the Night Slasher. The real Night Slasher used to lead a gang of thugs, and many murders were attributed to him, so people pay very good attention when you're talking to them. The real Night Slasher wouldn't hesitate to rip someone's arm off. The real Night Slasher was a psychopathic warlord of other psychopaths. But you're just the Night Stalker, so you were helpless when some real thugs stole your wallet. You have to get them killed them to prove that you are a real player. The real Night Slasher would kill them himself, but you're just the Night Stalker.

    Modulation Frustration: YOU have trouble MODULATING THE TONE of your [tiny]voice[/tiny], which OFTEN makes it hard for people to [tiny]understand you.[/tiny]

    TheLawinator->Krata - Sean Dillon
    You are pretty badass. You were an expert pilot and scuba diver as well as a master of disguise and languages. You are a member of the IRA, and you even saved the lives of the President and Prime Minister. "Want to hear about that time I saved the President and Prime Minister?" you say to people passing by, and they look away uncomfortably and walk on. Yes, you are old, and your glory days are past. But you'll be damned if you're going to let old age stop you from protecting your neighbors. After you do, they'll listen to your old stories with gratitude, yessir. Hey, there, do you want to hear about the time I saved...

    Zomething Rotten in the Ztate of: Replace every s in your posts with a z.

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
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    thorgotthorgot there is special providence in the fall of a sparrowRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I feel like you guys gave up after Locus died. If people hadn't stopped voting or posting, you would have had a shot.

    thorgot on
    campionthorgotsig.jpg
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    DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Yeah, not entirely unexpected.
    Honestly you had the right idea but so many people made irrelevant or inconsequential votes we were able to just steal the vote outright twice.

    Also my role was generated by using Wiki's random function and pulling something out of that. It is nowhere near as cool as some peoples. Iroquois? That was awesome, with your long houses and rather vicious nature against those not in the Confederacy.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
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    LocusLocus Trust Me The seaRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    For the first time ever, I actually deduced who the badguys were. Too bad they nailed the guardian on night one and then Krata decided to kill himself.

    Edit: I seriously considered choosing "B:L" for my role, but ultimately decided I couldn't do it justice.

    Locus on
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    DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    For the first time ever, I actually deduced who the badguys were. Too bad they nailed the guardian on night one and then Krata decided to kill himself.
    Yes. Voting for yourself is a horrible idea. Each and every fucking villager and special has an obligation to take full part in voting process or you'll let the bad guys just walk away with the game.

    Not much here but this is what passes for our proboard. Though lately Egos and I were just PMing.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
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    VarcaynVarcayn Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    HankScorpio2.jpg

    Woohoo, go team evil. I can honestly say that despite my premature demise I contributed by knocking off the guardian on night one. Although to be perfectly honest, once DA opens up our pro board, you'll see that I had no real suspicion that Aroduc was a special.

    Varcayn on
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    EgosEgos Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    For the first time ever, I actually deduced who the badguys were. Too bad they nailed the guardian on night one and then Krata decided to kill himself.

    Edit: I seriously considered choosing "B:L" for my role, but ultimately decided I couldn't do it justice.

    Yeah I was afraid of you since you seemed to know how these games worked (posting restrictions). And I had no bloody clue. Thought about just going with color but that seemed to obvious. And l337 speak sounded too annoying.

    Inactivity did seem to be the problem. Otherwise I think you would have won eventually.

    Egos on
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    AroducAroduc regular
    edited March 2008
    1/1 on voting for the baddies!

    Aroduc on
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    LocusLocus Trust Me The seaRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Egos wrote: »
    Locus wrote: »
    For the first time ever, I actually deduced who the badguys were. Too bad they nailed the guardian on night one and then Krata decided to kill himself.

    Edit: I seriously considered choosing "B:L" for my role, but ultimately decided I couldn't do it justice.

    Yeah I was afraid of you since you seemed to know how these games worked (posting restrictions). And I had no bloody clue. Thought about just going with color but that seemed to obvious. And l337 speak sounded too annoying.
    I would have believed leet speak as a restriction.

    I actually wrote out the following sentence for my final post and then decided against it: "If Egos is a bad guy then DA is too." I have a hard time sticking to my convictions. :oops:

    Also, I am a dude.

    Locus on
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    EgosEgos Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    Also, I am a dude.

    Yeah I started to think about it..And the boob signature seemed a bit overt .

    Egos on
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    M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    Egos wrote: »
    Locus wrote: »

    Also, I am a dude.

    You don't have to lie, we'll still accept you as a girl.

    M.D. on
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    LocusLocus Trust Me The seaRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    Also, I am a dude.

    You don't have to lie, we'll still accept you as a girl.
    Retract previous statement. I am a hot chick.

    green20eyesly3.jpg

    Locus on
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    EgosEgos Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    The Crimson Ghost

    I found it amusing...aside from the Misfits aspect of the character.

    edit : and hey "Dude..wheres my car?"

    Egos on
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    ShamusShamus Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    D'oh..we lost.

    Big surprise - felt like the village gave up. I'm not sure if it was due to the restrictions or not, but nobody seemed really involved this game. 8 pages? That's tiny, even for a mini-phalla.

    What gives?

    Shamus on
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    FrostMistFrostMist NorwayRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Was a cool concept - but when the thread died, there wasn't alot one could do, really :(

    FrostMist on
    Untitled-1.jpg
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    DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Aroduc wrote: »
    1/1 on voting for the baddies!

    Normally I wouldn't like killing you on day 1 but you did more than enough to deserve it this game.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
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    ArdorArdor Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Aroduc wrote: »
    1/1 on voting for the baddies!

    Normally I wouldn't like killing you on day 1 but you did more than enough to deserve it this game.

    The price one pays for being good along with the image to match.

    Ardor on
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    FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Locus wrote: »
    Edit: I seriously considered choosing "B:L" for my role, but ultimately decided I couldn't do it justice.

    I thought of this as well, too bad I decided not to play.

    FunkyWaltDogg on
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    El SkidEl Skid The frozen white northRegistered User regular
    edited March 2008
    It would have been hilarious if half of the phalla had "B:L" for their role.

    Hilarious

    We would've had to pop the real B:L's overinflated head afterwards, but it'd still have been worth it :P

    El Skid on
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    PsychoLarry1PsychoLarry1 Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    Man, I picked out both living bad guys and posted all kinds of awesome Naked Lunch lines. Someday I'll play well and win a phalla. Right now the two seem mutually exclusive.

    PsychoLarry1 on
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    KrataLightbladeKrataLightblade Registered User regular
    edited March 2008
    I actually hadn't intended to commit suicide.

    I just hadn't noticed that it was five minutes to vote close when I asked for someone's reasining.

    The last few weeks have kinda blurred together some. Sorry guys.

    KrataLightblade on
    LEVEL 50 SWORD JUGGLER/WIZARD!
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