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[MiniPhalla] Thief of Time Discphalla, GAME OVER: Apocralypse Now

QuothQuoth the RavenMiami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
edited June 2008 in Critical Failures
This is a miniphalla.

Don't know what Phalla is? Check the link.

Thief of Time

The Auditors of Reality are celestial bureaucrats. They make sure that gravity works, file the appropriate paperwork for each chemical reaction, and so forth. The Auditors hate life, because it's messy and unpredictable, which makes them fall behind on their paperwork; they much prefer barren balls of rock orbiting stars in neat, easily predictable elliptical paths. They really hate humans and other sentient beings, who are much more messy and unpredictable than other living things.

And so the Auditors have come to Discworld in yet another attempt to restore order and harmony to the universe. To do that, they have enlisted the quietly mad watchmaker Jeremy Clockson and his assistant Igor to construct a glass clock that, when activated, will stop time. Yes, all of it. This may have some unfortunate side effects, such as the Apocralypse (so named because it is an apocryphal apocalypse, nobody is sure when it will happen, how it will happen, and whether it will happen in the here-and-now sense).

The Auditors' plan will succeed in six days unless someone stops them first. Unfortunately for them, someone has just arrived.

Tick

Game will start at 10PM TONIGHT.

Rules:
Each night you will !vote one of your own to be apprehended by the Watch. The vote ends nightly at 10pm EST.

If you have an ability, you must PM me before the vote closes. ONE PM PER DAY. I will ignore any subsequent PMs and be angry that you are taking up my valuable Inbox space.

All normal Phalla rules apply. No PM copying, screen shots, etc. No contacting the living if dead, no anonymous contact. Provide me with links to any private boards.

Inactive Rule: Post meaningfully. One post per day minimum, and if you just stop by to vote, you will reach the end of cake (i.e. be removed from the game and replaced).

No sharing or quoting of PMs with the host.

This Miniphalla will last a total of 6 days.

Sign up in Lime.

Clarifications may be made in Some form of orange

Tick

List of current Auditors

1: TheLawinator - Mr Pink - Death by chocolate
2: Wildcat - Mr Cyan - Beaten to death
3: DevoutlyApathetic
4: Ryadic - Mr Puce - Another window bites the dust
5: FunkyWaltDogg - Mr Brown - Decapitated
6: Edcrab
7: [STRIKE]PolloDiablo[/STRIKE] Durax - Miss Taupe - Disembowelled
8: SpeedySwaf - Mr Magenta - Throttled
9: JoschuaESQ
10: Oatway - Mr Black - Defenestrated
11: Cynic Jester
12: TehSloth
13: Mr. Defecation
14: [strike]Darkblade_1[/strike] Toxic Toys - Mr Indigo Violet - Statued
15: eecc - Mr Blue - Cut in twain
16: Marshmallow - Mr Grey - Mixed-sex bacchanaled
17: Cold Salmon and Hatred - Jeremy Clockson - Frozen in time
18: FreeAgent - Igor - Gave notice
19: Obbi - Mr Cerulean - Kicked to death
20: Maximus - Mr Beige - Fisted
21: Fembot
22: Red Bird
23: Lignisse - Lobsang Ludd - Under arrest
24: Trust - Ronnie Soak (Kaos) - Sulking at the dairy
25: El Skid - Mr Orange - Force fed delicious death

Tick

Reserves

1: [strike]Toxic Toys[/strike]
2: [strike]Durax[/strike]
3: cheez
4: Frostmist

Tick

Villager Role PM
Auditor_of_Reality.jpg

You are an Auditor of Reality! You don't actually call yourself that; in fact, you didn't call yourself anything until you became corporeal a few hours ago. Now you call yourself MR/MISS COLOR because it is a color you have decided to like.

As an Auditor, you are charged with the task of ensuring that time is successfully stopped. Unfortunately, there are feeble humans out there trying to stop you, so you have to stop them first. You must get rid of all those who would stand in your way for your mission to succeed.

Every day, you must !vote for someone to be kicked out of the museum and arrested by the Watch. The clock is ticking. You want to be there when it stops. Forever.

Tick

Night 1 Results

TheLawinator - Mr Pink - Death by chocolate
Oatway - Mr Black - Defenestrated
Wildcat - Mr Cyan - Beaten to death



Night 2 Results

FunkyWaltDogg - Mr Brown - Decapitated
Obbi - Mr Cerulean - Kicked to death

Trust - Ronnie Soak (Kaos) - Sulking at the dairy


Night 3 Results

El Skid - Mr Orange - Force fed delicious death
Ryadic - Mr Puce - Another window bites the dust



Night 4 Results

Toxic Toys - Mr Indigo Violet - Statued
eecc - Mr Blue - Cut in twain

Lignisse - Lobsang Ludd - Under arrest


Night 5 results

SpeedySwaf - Mr Magenta - Throttled
Marshmallow - Mr Grey - Mixed-sex bacchanaled

FreeAgent - Igor - Gave notice


Night 6 results

Maximus - Mr Beige - Fisted
Durax - Miss Taupe - Disembowelled

Cold Salmon and Hatred - Jeremy Clockson - Frozen in time

Quoth on
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Posts

  • WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !Sign up, as long as I get a shilling and a Watch-issue sword.

    Wildcat on
  • OatsOats Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Can I sign up?

    Is it a sign up? Is it a request? Only time will tell.

    Oats on
  • OatsOats Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Yes and no, respectively.

    Oats on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Sign up

    I urge you all to remember rule 1.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !Sign up

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Discworld phalla? Count me in!

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oatway wrote: »
    Can I sign up?

    Is it a sign up? Is it a request? Only time will tell.

    Um, yes?

    Quoth on
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I would sign up, but I think I'd have an unfair insight into the mechanics of the game.

    Rainfall on
  • EdcrabEdcrab Actually a hack Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    KEEP LEFT >>>

    !Sign up

    Edcrab on
    cBY55.gifbmJsl.png
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Rainfall wrote: »
    I would sign up, but I think I'd have an unfair insight into the mechanics of the game.

    I would say so. But you are still more than welcome to help me run it. :P

    Quoth on
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oh yeah, of course. :P

    Rainfall on
  • OatsOats Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Sign up

    I urge you all to remember rule 1.

    Which rule 1?

    Oats on
  • PolloDiabloPolloDiablo Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !Sign up

    Count me in!

    PolloDiablo on
  • TheLawinatorTheLawinator Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !Sign up

    Never read any of these books, maybe I should?

    TheLawinator on
    My SteamID Gamertag and PSN: TheLawinator
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !Sign up

    Never read any of these books, maybe I should?

    Just remember Rule 1, and you'll be fine.

    Rainfall on
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oatway wrote: »
    Sign up

    I urge you all to remember rule 1.

    Which rule 1?

    Look here you, are you signing up or not? I demand answers!

    Quoth on
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    What is rule number one? Remember right from left, because Edcrab doesn't seem to know the difference. :P

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oatway wrote: »
    Sign up

    I urge you all to remember rule 1.

    Which rule 1?

    You've never heard of any rule 1 having to do with smiling old men?

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • RainfallRainfall Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DO NOT FEED THE ELEPHANT

    Rainfall on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ah, better. Now in color.

    As an aside I'm totally blaming Quoth for making me want the 2008 Discworld calender book. It's already half over with!

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ah, better. Now in color.

    As an aside I'm totally blaming Quoth for making me want the 2008 Discworld calender book. It's already half over with!

    My name is Quoth, and I approve your avatar.

    :^:

    Quoth on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I have a deep and abiding love of all things Pratchett. About the only thing I'd like better than this is an excuse to use a Moist von Lipwig avatar.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • EdcrabEdcrab Actually a hack Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ryadic wrote: »
    What is rule number one? Remember right from left, because Edcrab doesn't seem to know the difference. :P

    And poor old Ryadic has never had the pleasure of reading Thief of Time :P

    Edcrab on
    cBY55.gifbmJsl.png
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Thanks to the internets I now know what Rule # 1 is. Still doesn't help me.

    >.<

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Edcrab wrote: »
    Ryadic wrote: »
    What is rule number one? Remember right from left, because Edcrab doesn't seem to know the difference. :P

    And poor old Ryadic has never had the pleasure of reading Thief of Time :P

    No, but after checking it out on Wikipedia, I think I'll read it after the Wheel of Time.

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Thanks to the internets I now know what Rule # 1 is. Still doesn't help me.

    >.<
    All I'm hearing you say right now is this :
    Ryadic wrote:
    "I am an auditor, please vote for me day 1."

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Thanks to the internets I now know what Rule # 1 is. Still doesn't help me.

    >.<
    All I'm hearing you say right now is this :
    Ryadic wrote:
    "DevoutlyApathetic is an auditor, please vote for me day 1."

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • SpeedySwafSpeedySwaf Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    So, is it alright for us to play in more then two phallas?

    If so, !sign up

    SpeedySwaf on
  • DevoutlyApatheticDevoutlyApathetic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Ryadic wrote: »
    Thanks to the internets I now know what Rule # 1 is. Still doesn't help me.

    >.<
    All I'm hearing you say right now is this :
    Ryadic wrote:
    "DevoutlyApathetic is an auditor, please vote for me day 1."

    So the thing you're not getting and why the above joke falls flat is this: Auditors are very literal (are in fact like incarnations of literalness) and so a sign that says Left while pointing right causes them deep and abiding problems. They will simply not be able to understand that a statement like this could be incorrect.

    Thus, my original bit. Your reaction is very close to what would be expected from an auditor to the above comments in the thread.

    DevoutlyApathetic on
    Nod. Get treat. PSN: Quippish
  • RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I guess it probably would help to have read the books. =\

    Ryadic on
    steam_sig.png
  • JoschuaESQJoschuaESQ Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    CAN I PLAY?
    !Signup
    EDIT:
    This time, no dying on day one *crosses fingers / shakes fist at heavens

    JoschuaESQ on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • OatsOats Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Oatway wrote: »
    Can I sign up?

    Is it a sign up? Is it a request? Only time will tell.
    Oatway wrote: »
    Yes and no, respectively.

    So yes, Quoth, I attempted to sign up.

    Oats on
  • Cynic JesterCynic Jester Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !signup

    Cynic Jester on
  • Toxic ToysToxic Toys Are you really taking my advice? Really?Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I'll !Reserve up I'm still in the Robot game.

    Toxic Toys on
    3DS code: 2938-6074-2306, Nintendo Network ID: ToxicToys, PSN: zutto
  • TehSlothTehSloth Hit Or Miss I Guess They Never Miss, HuhRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Meh, I'm not to keen on them there "books" you speak of, but !sign me up¡
    Hooray Wiki :winky:

    TehSloth on
    FC: 1993-7778-8872 PSN: TehSloth Xbox: SlothTeh
    twitch.tv/tehsloth
  • M.D.M.D. and then what happens? Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I'll try to do this one as well so !sign me up :3

    M.D. on
  • Darkblade_1Darkblade_1 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2008
    !Signup

    Shit yes Discphalla!

    Quick, someone give me some chocolate.

    Darkblade_1 on
    iveseenvivstits.gif
    You're drawn to my eccentric Brawl Code: 4596 9143 4529
  • ecco the dolphinecco the dolphin Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    !sign up

    Curses! Now which phalla do I design a new avatar for?

    ecco the dolphin on
    Penny Arcade Developers at PADev.net.
  • QuothQuoth the Raven Miami, FL FOR REALRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
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