As was foretold, we've added advertisements to the forums! If you have questions, or if you encounter any bugs, please visit this thread: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/240191/forum-advertisement-faq-and-reports-thread/
Options

Let's Think Up The Worst Possible Super Powers

2456

Posts

  • Options
    The JokerThe Joker Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Legion of Superheroes was definitely first, but it's not a concept that is out of the realm of possibility for people making a movie like Mystery Men to come up with on their own.

    I think you're being too lenient, but I'll forgive you for it and move on, if only because there's nothing in the rule book that says a giraffe can't play footBALL.

    The Joker on
  • Options
    manaleak34manaleak34 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mind reading, only problem is it only seems to work when people are thinking something bad about you.

    manaleak34 on
    XBL/Steam:ManaCrevice
  • Options
    MuddBuddMuddBudd Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Oh my friends and I did this once in line for a show. We tried to think of powers that have no actual practical use.

    My favorite we came up with was blood summoning. The ability to summon, project, create, and otherwise control blood (except other peoples). It failed our challenge though because you could help the Red Cross immensely with it.

    Or go into a public restroom, blast a stall, and leave it there to scare the hell of of someone.

    Or make blood appear on someones pantseat.

    Yeah basically I wanted it just for prank value.
    manaleak34 wrote: »
    Mind reading, only problem is it only seems to work when people are thinking something bad about you.

    Isn't that basically spidey-sense?

    MuddBudd on
    There's no plan, there's no race to be run
    The harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun.
  • Options
    sportzboytjwsportzboytjw squeeeeeezzeeee some more tax breaks outRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    How about the power to not be affected by alcohol?? I mean, that'd suck right?

    sportzboytjw on
    Walkerdog on MTGO
    TylerJ on League of Legends (it's free and fun!)
  • Options
    The JokerThe Joker Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    MuddBudd wrote: »
    Oh my friends and I did this once in line for a show. We tried to think of powers that have no actual practical use.

    My favorite we came up with was blood summoning. The ability to summon, project, create, and otherwise control blood (except other peoples). It failed our challenge though because you could help the Red Cross immensely with it.

    I was going to say that it would be useless for that if it was blood infected with AIDs, but then it could be used as an offensive weapon if done right, albeit a slow acting one. So that doesn't work.

    What if it was pigs blood?

    The Joker on
  • Options
    manaleak34manaleak34 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    MuddBudd wrote: »
    manaleak34 wrote: »
    Mind reading, only problem is it only seems to work when people are thinking something bad about you.
    Isn't that basically spidey-sense?

    That senses more general danger, this would just make it so that when someone thought "Man this guy is a total asshole" you would hear it.

    Though I suppose hearing "I'm gonna stab this guy in the back with a knife" would be helpful.

    manaleak34 on
    XBL/Steam:ManaCrevice
  • Options
    ServoServo Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    alright how about

    if you drink ammonia, then you go through all of the terrible pain that would entail but rather than suffer any permanent damage, your skin color temporarily changes slowly back and forth between bright orange and pale green

    Servo on
    newsigs.jpg
  • Options
    sportzboytjwsportzboytjw squeeeeeezzeeee some more tax breaks outRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Hmm, I dunno... chicks would dig it I bet.

    sportzboytjw on
    Walkerdog on MTGO
    TylerJ on League of Legends (it's free and fun!)
  • Options
    ServoServo Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2008
    yeah

    "here, watch me writhe around vomiting and shitting myself in pain for a few hours and then i'll turn colors for five minutes, then we can do it"

    Servo on
    newsigs.jpg
  • Options
    sportzboytjwsportzboytjw squeeeeeezzeeee some more tax breaks outRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Ok, so you'd have to know your target audience... like... Goth girls or something?

    sportzboytjw on
    Walkerdog on MTGO
    TylerJ on League of Legends (it's free and fun!)
  • Options
    CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    My contribution: your ears actually burn when someone talks about you.

    And, for the hell of it,, you're a popular superhero, too.
    KVW wrote: »
    Arm-Fall Off Boy is probably the worst possible super power in the world.

    armfalloffboyjv1.jpg

    panels like this are why I love old school-legion of superheroes

    I can't believe he's on Wikipedia.

    Cyvros on
  • Options
    ChurchChurch Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Church on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    chaosbearchaosbear Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Didn't Flaming Carrot Comics and the Mysterymen team appear before that particular issue of Secret Orgins?

    chaosbear on
  • Options
    scarvexxscarvexx Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    look at this giy he looks like batman and wolverine had a baby
    dark-claw-comics.jpg


    naked butter lad thats the worst

    scarvexx on
  • Options
    LuxLux Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to taste the future. Not see the future, but tastes of things to come appear in your mouth.

    "Something...kind of salty is going to happen."

    Lux on
  • Options
    WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    scarvexx wrote: »
    look at this giy he looks like batman and wolverine had a baby
    I really hope you're being ironic, but somehow I doubt it.

    Wildcat on
  • Options
    CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    scarvexx wrote: »
    look at this giy he looks like batman and wolverine had a baby

    That's fantastic.
    Wiki wrote:
    At the age of 5, after witnessing his parents' murder at the hands of an armed robber, Logan Wayne was sent to live with his uncle in Alberta, Canada. [...] Logan guards his secret identity well, as only his sidekick Sparrow (a combination of DC's Robin and Marvel's Jubilee) and the Huntress know of his superhero alter-ego. However, his arch-nemesis, the Hyena (A combination of the Joker and Sabretooth), also knows his secret as he was also a part of the Weapon X program which gave Dark Claw his adamantium skeleton and awakened his latent metamutant powers.

    Edit: I can't believe I've never heard of Amalgam Comics before. *scratches head*

    Cyvros on
  • Options
    Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    the power to snort cocaine

    Calamity Jane on
    twitter https://twitter.com/mperezwritesirl michelle patreon https://www.patreon.com/thatwronglove michelle's comic book from IMAGE COMICS you can order http://a.co/dn5YeUD
  • Options
    Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Cyvros wrote: »
    scarvexx wrote: »
    look at this giy he looks like batman and wolverine had a baby

    That's fantastic.
    Wiki wrote:
    At the age of 5, after witnessing his parents' murder at the hands of an armed robber, Logan Wayne was sent to live with his uncle in Alberta, Canada. [...] Logan guards his secret identity well, as only his sidekick Sparrow (a combination of DC's Robin and Marvel's Jubilee) and the Huntress know of his superhero alter-ego. However, his arch-nemesis, the Hyena (A combination of the Joker and Sabretooth), also knows his secret as he was also a part of the Weapon X program which gave Dark Claw his adamantium skeleton and awakened his latent metamutant powers.

    Edit: I can't believe I've never heard of Amalgam Comics before. *scratches head*

    I think we all agreed to never speak of that affair again.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • Options
    sportzboytjwsportzboytjw squeeeeeezzeeee some more tax breaks outRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I seem to recall enjoying the punisher/wonder woman issue.

    sportzboytjw on
    Walkerdog on MTGO
    TylerJ on League of Legends (it's free and fun!)
  • Options
    CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I think we all agreed to never speak of that affair again.

    You may have agreed, but I've never posted in this forum before. :D

    Cyvros on
  • Options
    ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to transmute gold into lead.

    Thomamelas on
  • Options
    GonmunGonmun He keeps kickin' me in the dickRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to barf up acid that can burn metal, only, it burns going up too.

    Gonmun on
    desc wrote: »
    ~ * swole patrol flying roundhouse kick top performer recognition: April 2014 * ~
    If you have a sec, check out my podcast: War and Beast Twitter Facebook
  • Options
    CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    To crawl up walls.

    Just up walls, though.

    Cyvros on
  • Options
    StarcrossStarcross Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I usually judge super powers by the metric of "could you fight crime just as, if not more, effectively simply by buying a gun". If yes then your superpower is shit. Arm fall off boy is the first super hero I've seen who's beaten not just by a man with a gun, but by a man with a short piece of wood.

    Starcross on
  • Options
    WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Starcross wrote: »
    I usually judge super powers by the metric of "could you fight crime just as, if not more, effectively simply by buying a gun". If yes then your superpower is shit. Arm fall off boy is the first super hero I've seen who's beaten not just by a man with a gun, but by a man with a short piece of wood.
    Does the Punisher give your equation a divide by zero result?

    Wildcat on
  • Options
    The_LightbringerThe_Lightbringer Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to mimic and copy super powers....

    In a world with no other super humans

    The_Lightbringer on
    LuciferSig.jpg
  • Options
    see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to give yourself cancer.
    But you can't cure the self inflicted cancer though. For that you have to go through Chemo. And it might not work.

    see317 on
  • Options
    WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to mimic and copy super powers....

    In a world with no other super humans
    I thought about that once myself - the only potential downside is the inevitable cross-over that will result in the character getting a lock of Superman's hair or something.

    Wildcat on
  • Options
    ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    see317 wrote: »
    The ability to give yourself cancer.
    But you can't cure the self inflicted cancer though. For that you have to go through Chemo. And it might not work.

    Actually...that could work...

    "Honey, it's time to go to the mall for us to spend hours looking at clothing that, isn't lingerie and frankly isn't flattering, for me while you hold my purse...."
    "Can't Honey....pretty sure I have cancer again."
    "Again?"
    "Yep. Got to go to the oncologist." And under his breath "Please god, let the chemo fail..."

    Thomamelas on
  • Options
    KVWKVW Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Cyvros wrote: »
    scarvexx wrote: »
    look at this giy he looks like batman and wolverine had a baby

    That's fantastic.
    Wiki wrote:
    At the age of 5, after witnessing his parents' murder at the hands of an armed robber, Logan Wayne was sent to live with his uncle in Alberta, Canada. [...] Logan guards his secret identity well, as only his sidekick Sparrow (a combination of DC's Robin and Marvel's Jubilee) and the Huntress know of his superhero alter-ego. However, his arch-nemesis, the Hyena (A combination of the Joker and Sabretooth), also knows his secret as he was also a part of the Weapon X program which gave Dark Claw his adamantium skeleton and awakened his latent metamutant powers.

    Edit: I can't believe I've never heard of Amalgam Comics before. *scratches head*

    I think we all agreed to never speak of that affair again.

    Maybe you agreed to, but I thought Amalgam was a lot of fun. Dark Claw was actually a good issue as were several others, like Spider-Boy, Speed Demon, etc. It was like a fanboy's wet dream come true.

    Now, the actual fights, like Wolverine beating Lobo and shit, that we don't speak of.

    KVW on
  • Options
    TubeTube Registered User admin
    edited July 2008
    I was thinking about this in the shower the other day while gently soaping my body

    I think the power to always know when someone is talking about you and what they're saying would suck ass.

    Tube on
  • Options
    FeathersMcGrawFeathersMcGraw Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Maybe not the worst, but I'm guessing that the ability to turn into any flavor of ice cream may crack the top 20.

    FeathersMcGraw on
  • Options
    Bloods EndBloods End Blade of Tyshalle Punch dimensionRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Burrito vision.

    Bloods End on
  • Options
    FallingmanFallingman Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I was thinking about this in the shower the other day while gently soaping my body

    I'm sorry - I tuned out - was there more to this post? ;-)

    I think you want a hint of potential, but an infuriating caveat... like Super strength... but only when your eyes are closed.

    Or invisibility... but only when you're on one foot.

    Or invulnerability... so long as you're holding your breath.

    Fallingman on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Options
    Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    KVW wrote: »
    Maybe you agreed to, but I thought Amalgam was a lot of fun. Dark Claw was actually a good issue as were several others, like Spider-Boy, Speed Demon, etc. It was like a fanboy's wet dream come true.

    Now, the actual fights, like Wolverine beating Lobo and shit, that we don't speak of.

    I've never had that particular wet dream.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • Options
    DevnoimagDevnoimag Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I thought of this one a few years back. A man with the power that if he concentrated on an individual, and hurt himself, they would be hurt in the same manner.
    Paired with a hero who could heal his self sustained wounds, he would be a force to reckon with. If he were by himself? Not so much.

    Devnoimag on
  • Options
    Mr PinkMr Pink I got cats for youRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Im telling you guys, immortal with no ability to heal even minor wounds. The first time you tripped and broke an arm, that arm is broken forever.

    Also, the ability to speak any language, but not comprehend them.

    Also also, super speed, but it only works when you keep your eyes closed.

    Mr Pink on
  • Options
    greygrey Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The power of Narration.

    grey on
  • Options
    ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to count amazingly high.

    Thomamelas on
Sign In or Register to comment.