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Let's Think Up The Worst Possible Super Powers

1356

Posts

  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    The ability to count amazingly high.
    But only in prime numbers.
    "I'm going to give you to the count of 10... wait, no damnit I can't. I'm going to count to 3, 3 times and then count to 1. Give yourself up by then or else..."

    see317 on
  • WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    grey wrote: »
    The power of Narration.
    That reminds me of a magic item description I once saw - the Soundtrack Amulet, which would constantly play event-reactive music. You could never do anything stealthily, but could never be snuck up on as its music would change to your combat theme if anyone tried.

    Wildcat on
  • ThomamelasThomamelas Only one man can kill this many Russians. Bring his guitar to me! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    see317 wrote: »
    Thomamelas wrote: »
    The ability to count amazingly high.
    But only in prime numbers.

    That actually makes it better. The primes would be interesting. Just imagine a steady stream of numbers running through your head. No other internal monologue or thought process.

    Thomamelas on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    How about being able to cook good food but never able to eat it since you have no taste?

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mr Pink wrote: »
    Im telling you guys, immortal with no ability to heal even minor wounds. The first time you tripped and broke an arm, that arm is broken forever.

    That's basically a smart zombie.

    Now tell me that wouldn't be at least a little cool.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mr Pink wrote: »
    Im telling you guys, immortal with no ability to heal even minor wounds. The first time you tripped and broke an arm, that arm is broken forever.

    That's basically a smart zombie.

    Now tell me that wouldn't be at least a little cool.

    Wasn't there that movie with bruce willis and these two other chicks where the women got immortality but then ended up killing each other, so their body was dead but they were alive, they would look dead and end up falling apart and such. That must suck.

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mr Pink wrote: »
    Im telling you guys, immortal with no ability to heal even minor wounds. The first time you tripped and broke an arm, that arm is broken forever.

    That's basically a smart zombie.

    Now tell me that wouldn't be at least a little cool.

    Wasn't there that movie with bruce willis and these two other chicks where the women got immortality but then ended up killing each other, so their body was dead but they were alive, they would look dead and end up falling apart and such. That must suck.

    On the other hand, it could go a little something like this.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsqulpACYxE

    AWESOME.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • CrimsondudeCrimsondude Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Wasn't there that movie with bruce willis and these two other chicks where the women got immortality but then ended up killing each other, so their body was dead but they were alive, they would look dead and end up falling apart and such. That must suck.

    Death Becomes Her. It was with Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn.

    The thing is, it wasn't suffering injuries that made them fragile so much as how they were "repaired" (Really, using spray paint instead of makeup on corpses is fucking inspired). Although the end was just goddamn hilarious.
    They trip down some stairs while bitching at each other and end up in pieces still bitching at each other.

    Crimsondude on
  • TransporterTransporter Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.

    Transporter on
  • Mai-KeroMai-Kero Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.

    Only if you're evil?

    And even then, you could be a world class torturer.

    Mai-Kero on
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mai-Kero wrote: »
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.

    Only if you're evil?

    And even then, you could be a world class torturer.

    You'd be hounded day and night.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • psycojesterpsycojester Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mr Pink wrote: »
    Im telling you guys, immortal with no ability to heal even minor wounds. The first time you tripped and broke an arm, that arm is broken forever.

    That's basically a smart zombie.

    Now tell me that wouldn't be at least a little cool.

    Wasn't there that movie with bruce willis and these two other chicks where the women got immortality but then ended up killing each other, so their body was dead but they were alive, they would look dead and end up falling apart and such. That must suck.

    On the other hand, it could go a little something like this.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsqulpACYxE

    AWESOME.

    What in the name of mother fucking baby jesus punting mary mother or gods did i just watch? I'm doubly offended by that as i once played Dalk Stalkers and thought Raptor was cool if inexplicable and as an Australian because very wrong things have been done to that accent.

    psycojester on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Mai-KeroMai-Kero Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mai-Kero wrote: »
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.

    Only if you're evil?

    And even then, you could be a world class torturer.

    You'd be hounded day and night.

    Which wouldn't be that hard to get away from if they need you to heal them. I mean, people without legs don't run very fast.

    Mai-Kero on
  • Mr PinkMr Pink I got cats for youRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.


    ...Jesus?

    Mr Pink on
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Yeah, I'd hate to be Jesus.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • HawkstoneHawkstone Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things. Somewhere outside of BarstowRegistered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The power to use your butt crack as a toaster....unfortunatley its inedible as you still use your ass for its intended purpose. About all you could do is gross people out with your ass toast.

    Hawkstone on
    Inside of a dog...it's too dark to read.
  • WildcatWildcat Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I was trying to think about something like a werewolf transformation that came without superstrength etc, but that would still get you laid at certain cons so

    Wildcat on
  • TransporterTransporter Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Heat Vision.

    Without invulnerability.

    You can use your power.

    But whoops ur ded.

    Transporter on
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Autonomous body parts, each with their own intellect and voice in your head.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • BriareosBriareos Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to move at speeds approaching the speed of light, but with normal perception and reflexes, and no way to protect yourself or your clothes from friction.

    I suppose you might be able to train yourself to handle running at 150 miles per hour or so, but you'd need special shoes. Run fast enough and you burn your shoes off, then your feet. Better have some serious eye protection, too, because motes of dust hitting the human eye at Mach 5 hurt!

    Briareos on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PbPb Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    I've said it before, but this guy has it pretty rough.

    Pb on
  • digital.aarondigital.aaron Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to hold your eyes open for an indefinite period of time, without needing to blick to relubricate your eyes. Thus you would be able to win any staring contest you entered.

    digital.aaron on
  • LuxLux Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Pb wrote: »
    I've said it before, but this guy has it pretty rough.

    Wait.

    So slugs come out of his stomach and then eat things, then go back inside? Or is he just like Matter Eater Lad in more disgusting detail?

    Lux on
  • PbPb Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The slugs bore out of him, eat shit, and then bore back in.

    Pb on
  • john fechonjohn fechon Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mai-Kero wrote: »
    The ability to heal others would be the WORST power ever.

    Only if you're evil?

    And even then, you could be a world class torturer.

    You'd be hounded day and night.

    The 4400 covered this, guy could heal almost anything, but it drained him to do it. Eventually big corporate guy set up a shady system where rich and influential were given first spots in line to be healed. A rock star even tried using him as is personal rez whenever he would OD from partying.

    Might have turned evil from being used like a tool, I stopped watching.

    Still, I'd dig the power. You could be the greatest doctor in the world with no formal schooling.

    john fechon on
  • Mai-KeroMai-Kero Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Pb wrote: »
    The slugs bore out of him, eat shit, and then bore back in.

    And then give him superpowers.

    Mai-Kero on
  • digital.aarondigital.aaron Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Mai-Kero wrote: »
    Pb wrote: »
    The slugs bore out of him, eat shit, and then bore back in.

    And then give him superpowers.


    I'm glad they killed him off.

    digital.aaron on
  • MunchMunch Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Maggot was awesome you dicks.

    Dang.

    I always hated that Maggot and Cecilia Reyes got killed off-panel in such a dismissive way.

    Munch on
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Cecilia isn't confirmed as dead.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • Salvation122Salvation122 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Being able to hear what you significant other and all of your exes are thinking, constantly, all the time, without cease.

    Salvation122 on
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Being able to turn your penis into any shape, save the shape of a penis.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • see317see317 Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Autonomous body parts, each with their own intellect and voice in your head.
    Left Hand: "Look, boss, I know you're lonely. But seriously, not tonight. That guys a real dick, and his neighbor... jeez what an asshole."

    As for bad super powers, the ability to tell exactly how many miles are left before the front passenger-side tire has to be replaced. But only on 1996 fords.

    see317 on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Munch wrote: »
    Maggot was awesome you dicks.

    Dang.

    I always hated that Maggot and Cecilia Reyes got killed off-panel in such a dismissive way.

    munch I knew there was a reason I liked you

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    grey wrote: »
    The power of Narration.

    "My God, what is that mysterious blur in the sky saving mankind?"
    Why, it's none other than... Internal Monologue Man!


    Zach Braff to play the title role in the feature film.

    Cyvros on
  • The Lord of HatsThe Lord of Hats Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to become immobile relative to the universe. So essentially, you appear to either go soaring off into space at incredible speeds, or squish into the ground.

    The Lord of Hats on
  • MunchMunch Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Cecilia isn't confirmed as dead.
    Wiki wrote:
    Later, she was briefly seen as a prisoner at a mutant concentration camp run by the Weapon X program, where she attempted to use her medical expertise to help out the other prisoners. She was apparently killed when a brainwashed Agent Zero destroyed the camp, and her death was later confirmed in the letter column of New Excalibur #1. However it seems this was a mistake, as Mike Marts clarified in an interview on uncannyxmen.net, stating that if Cecilia would be dead they would show it on panel, and therefore Cecilia was not yet considered deceased at that time.[1] In Endangered Species, it was shown that she was possibly killed when Neverland was closed and the prisoners purged as the sole prisoner seen in close-up looked like her in her first appearance.

    In X-Men: The 198 Files, it has been revealed that Cecilia's older non-mutant brother, Colonel Miguel Reyes, has now been assigned to head O*N*E security on the Xavier School grounds, with the purpose of finding out the fate of his sister.

    I could have sworn she was officially dead, and wiki seems to back it, but apparently they've gone back and forth on it a few times. I hope someone remembers to use her at some point, but I imagine Faiza in MI 13 is going to fill the niche of superhero doctor in the Marvel U for the foreseeable future.

    Munch on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    honestly that team/run was one of my favorite times in X-Men comics

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • Robos A Go GoRobos A Go Go Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    Is it collected in any trades? I only read it sporadically off of news stands and spinner racks.

    Robos A Go Go on
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    it's not in any trades.

    The Lovely Bastard on
    7656367.jpg
  • CyvrosCyvros Registered User regular
    edited July 2008
    The ability to change the colour of your skin and hair. And since this could actually be useful for camouflage, you can only choose from 256 solid colours.

    Cyvros on
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