Next time after she finishes her fun just sit and talk. In my limited experiance people are more willing to talk about sexual things either during or right after sexual things happen. Even after heavy making out I've had a few interesting conversations. so what I would do is suggest a completely open and non-judgemental conversation. Me and my girlfriend do this all the time and its very liberating, we simply say that anything said after this point will be the truth and no hidden messages, we can say anything to each other and not have to worry about being rejected or thought to be weird and I've learned a lot about her sexual appetite from such conversations.
As for the mutual masturbation thing, she can barely kiss and do other things at the same time so thats sorta out of the question. Diddling her fiddle and her playing with me would be horrible for both of us.
I'm not sure how either one of us would feel about me taking on and off your clothing
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
As for the mutual masturbation thing, she can barely kiss and do other things at the same time so thats sorta out of the question. Diddling her fiddle and her playing with me would be horrible for both of us.
I'm not sure how either one of us would feel about me taking on and off your clothing
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
That strikes me as as a strange thing to say. Did you press for any more information?
As for the mutual masturbation thing, she can barely kiss and do other things at the same time so thats sorta out of the question. Diddling her fiddle and her playing with me would be horrible for both of us.
I'm not sure how either one of us would feel about me taking on and off your clothing
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
That strikes me as as a strange thing to say. Did you press for any more information?
Strange is a bit of an understatement. You can play with her cooter but god forbid any clothes come off?
As for the mutual masturbation thing, she can barely kiss and do other things at the same time so thats sorta out of the question. Diddling her fiddle and her playing with me would be horrible for both of us.
I'm not sure how either one of us would feel about me taking on and off your clothing
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
What struck me as weird is how she says "either one of us". Shes telling him how he feels about the matter?
That strikes me as as a strange thing to say. Did you press for any more information?
Strange is a bit of an understatement. You can play with her cooter but god forbid any clothes come off?
What struck me as strange was how she says "either one of us". Shes telling him how he feels about the matter?
I suggest you don't initiate the fooling around. Next time she tries to get you to finger her, go ahead and start lightly, but fairly quickly into it put her hand on your crotch. If nothing else she will probably start rubbing. Baby steps.
I'm not sure how giving a timid, insecure girl sexual favours and then pulling a: "Now you owe me! *zip*" on her would make her feel more comfortable with the situation. I mean, it hardly qualifies as a brilliant idea.
Talk to her. Be gentle about it, let her know that you're not feeling that you're getting what you want out of the relationship. Don't say "Man I'm getting blue balls this is ridiculous", because if she's a shy, timid girl who is insecure about her body, that is probably not the type of thing to coax her out of a shell.
Let her know that you think she's beautiful. Go slow. And keep the lines of communication open.
Honestly, if these things are so important to you I recommend just finding a different girl. You can lead horses to water but you can't make them drink.
Casket on
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Magus`The fun has been DOUBLED!Registered Userregular
edited October 2006
In my experience asking (and, really, in a sense begging) for sexual acts takes the fun out of it. Luckily I don't run into this problem.
Just go slow, don't push yourself or her.
Also, yeah, don't do the 'You owe me one' shit. That would blow. Or not blow. Whatever.
Be as open with her about this as you were with us.
Tell her that you want this, but also tell her how you're concerned about trying to push her into something that she doesn't want to do. If she's lacking confidence, then you need to give her that confidence. You'll feel embarrassed if this is the first time you've talked to a girl about this, but you need to show her that you trust her enough to let her see your vulnerability. If you think that'll make you seem like a pussy, then tell her.
If you really like this girl then you need to be honest with her. If you feel like you're just reeling out a bunch of cheesey film/song quotes then tell her. Tell her you don't know how to put it into words, but that you have to tell her what you feel. Women will forgive crappy phrasing if they know that the intent was good.
Present options, not ultimatums. Whatever you do, Do not and I repeat do NOT tell her that you asked for advice on the internet. No matter what you say about "trying to find the right way to approach the subject", there is a very real danger of "You talked about me on the internet, you bastard!"
Gorak on
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Blake TDo you have enemies then?Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.Registered Userregular
As for the mutual masturbation thing, she can barely kiss and do other things at the same time so thats sorta out of the question. Diddling her fiddle and her playing with me would be horrible for both of us.
I'm not sure how either one of us would feel about me taking on and off your clothing
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
The we is just a reflection of the fact that since she hates her body (or not comftable) you also must obviously find it absolutly disgusting. Just work on her self confidence, tell her that you think that she's a good looking girl, tell her that you think she looks good while naked and point out specific things. Also turn the lights down she'll feel more confident, and show her that you have no problem with being naked either.
Posts
To paraphrase Chris Rock, "Finding a woman who doesn't give head is like finding a Betamax. It's like, 'They still MAKE YOU?!'"
That is from conversation today, via instant message. I'm really confused, sad, and I feel almost like i'm being used. I know shes still awkward with her body but do you think she even thinks about what i want or need?
I'm running an emotional high right now and i'm worrying way too much.
Did you say that?
haha made you look
That strikes me as as a strange thing to say. Did you press for any more information?
Strange is a bit of an understatement. You can play with her cooter but god forbid any clothes come off?
What struck me as strange was how she says "either one of us". Shes telling him how he feels about the matter?
Secret Satan
Do not go for the BJ before the HJ.
Indeed, steady as she goes.
Talk to her. Be gentle about it, let her know that you're not feeling that you're getting what you want out of the relationship. Don't say "Man I'm getting blue balls this is ridiculous", because if she's a shy, timid girl who is insecure about her body, that is probably not the type of thing to coax her out of a shell.
Let her know that you think she's beautiful. Go slow. And keep the lines of communication open.
Just go slow, don't push yourself or her.
Also, yeah, don't do the 'You owe me one' shit. That would blow. Or not blow. Whatever.
Steam Profile | Signature art by Alexandra 'Lexxy' Douglass
Tell her that you want this, but also tell her how you're concerned about trying to push her into something that she doesn't want to do. If she's lacking confidence, then you need to give her that confidence. You'll feel embarrassed if this is the first time you've talked to a girl about this, but you need to show her that you trust her enough to let her see your vulnerability. If you think that'll make you seem like a pussy, then tell her.
If you really like this girl then you need to be honest with her. If you feel like you're just reeling out a bunch of cheesey film/song quotes then tell her. Tell her you don't know how to put it into words, but that you have to tell her what you feel. Women will forgive crappy phrasing if they know that the intent was good.
Most importantly
Present options, not ultimatums. Whatever you do, Do not and I repeat do NOT tell her that you asked for advice on the internet. No matter what you say about "trying to find the right way to approach the subject", there is a very real danger of "You talked about me on the internet, you bastard!"
The we is just a reflection of the fact that since she hates her body (or not comftable) you also must obviously find it absolutly disgusting. Just work on her self confidence, tell her that you think that she's a good looking girl, tell her that you think she looks good while naked and point out specific things. Also turn the lights down she'll feel more confident, and show her that you have no problem with being naked either.
Satans..... hints.....
sweet huh?