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Terrible Sex

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Posts

  • BigDesBigDes Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    So what finally woke you up?
    Well my light was still on and I had the vague sense of unfinished business.

    sexiest ghost ever.

    Funky Phantom got some.

    BigDes on
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  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I tend to cuddle while playing GTA IV.

    I mean, yeah I'll cuddle, pillow talk, say some sweet things, but c'mon you interrupted my game.

    Graves on
  • VivixenneVivixenne Remember your training, and we'll get through this just fine. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I fall asleep post-orgasm all the damn time

    if the dude wants to clean up and do other things that's cool

    but I do like to be snuggled at some point

    Vivixenne on
    XBOX: NOVADELPHINI | DISCORD: NOVADELPHINI #7387 | TWITTER
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mori's actually the right height to snuggle nicely

    Janson on
  • MorivethMoriveth BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWNRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I don't think I've fallen asleep jerkin' it

    Moriveth on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Graves wrote: »
    I tend to cuddle while playing GTA IV.

    I mean, yeah I'll cuddle, pillow talk, say some sweet things, but c'mon you interrupted my game.

    "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME CAN'T YOU SEE I'M PLAYIN!!!!!!"

    "SHUT UP ALREADY! JUST SHUT UP! LOOK AT WHAT YOU JUST MADE ME DOOOOO!!!!"

    RocketSauce on
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I like to cuddle with my pillow

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    My phone has a test menu if you put in this number, and the vibrator test has been used for unspeakable things.

    Graves on
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Graves wrote: »
    I tend to cuddle while playing GTA IV.

    I mean, yeah I'll cuddle, pillow talk, say some sweet things, but c'mon you interrupted my game.

    "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME CAN'T YOU SEE I'M PLAYIN!!!!!!"

    "SHUT UP ALREADY! JUST SHUT UP! LOOK AT WHAT YOU JUST MADE ME DOOOOO!!!!"

    Haha nah, it's more like we're layin' there and I'm all bein' sweet, then I subtly reach over for the controller, and she usually doesn't mind because I give her what she wants and she knows I'm a big enough nerd that I'm not doing it because I don't wanna cuddle, I'm just doing it because I love me some secksbocks

    Graves on
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I am so happy I came into the sex thread during talk about cuddling.

    sex that starts as cuddling is always so nice

    Futore on
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  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Wren wrote: »
    I like to cuddle with my pillow

    i do this too. i have a body pillow, to hold between my knees because i don't like my feet touching when i sleep, and a big ol' puffy feather pillow, for snugglin'.

    Metzger Meister on
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Anyone seen that new facial moisturizer? The one that vibrates?

    Yeah, I can see about 14 million teenage girls asking their parents to buy those for them and then using it for something else. How has no one else noticed this yet? I mean, for fucks sake, people used to pull the rumble pack out of the N64 controllers so they'd constantly rumble.

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    I like snuggling with a girl and then start feeling her up. Sleepy moans turn into 'I wanna sleep'

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    One time I was playing GTA and the game froze up when a car exploded, and the controller was stuck in perpetual wireless vibration.

    Graves on
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I like snuggling with a girl and then start feeling her up. Sleepy moans turn into 'I wanna sleep'

    and that's when you know the roofies are really starting to kick in.

    Metzger Meister on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I like snuggling with a girl and then start feeling her up. Sleepy moans turn into 'I wanna sleep'

    I sleep molest my fiance all the time. I just suddenly wake up and I'm feeling her up.

    RocketSauce on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    I've never drugged anyone, unless getting someone drunk can be deemed as drugging.

    Auntie Shibby on
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  • Macro9Macro9 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    "Do you have any idea how wasted I would have to be to let you put it in my ass?"

    "Like... 2 beers wasted?"

    "Pretty much."

    Graves on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    Man, my ex turned into more of a sex fiend when she was drunk. I wouldn't mind if when we were together I had loaned her out to some friends. Whatever got me a decent rest. She worked night shift, so she'd be coming home as I was waking up. She wouldn't fall asleep until about 9 in the nine, and when she woke up at 5 in the afternoon she was ready to go again. And then again when she was about to get ready for work.

    She called me once from work telling she was about to go on her lunch and the breakroom had a lock on the door. That was the second time I've had sex in a Wal-Mart.

    Auntie Shibby on
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  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    2? are you making numbers up?

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Me or Shibby?

    Graves on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    I already told Deemer this, it would take about 9 beers in an hour for me to have gay sex. It's been tested.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    Graves wrote: »
    Me or Shibby?
    I don't make numbers up, you number liar.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • Dely AppleDely Apple Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Shibby was banned long ago and now Bogey makes up things for him to say

    Dely Apple on
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  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Graves wrote: »
    Me or Shibby?

    you

    I dont think shibby used 2 in anything

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I bet just as many babies are born in the Walmart bathroom as there are conceived there.

    RocketSauce on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    Dely Apple wrote: »
    Shibby was banned long ago and now Bogey makes up things for him to say
    I'm just a puppet on a string.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • GravesGraves Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Well I was saying that she's a teatotaller and a sex fiend.

    Also it takes a lot of beer to make me gay.

    But I've never been too drunk to deny gay sex.

    Graves on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    Wren wrote: »
    Graves wrote: »
    Me or Shibby?

    you

    I dont think shibby used 2 in anything
    I didn't use the number, I said second.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • bowenbowen How you doin'? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    www.neutrogenawave.com

    The discreet vibrator disguised as a facial exfoliater?

    bowen on
    not a doctor, not a lawyer, examples I use may not be fully researched so don't take out of context plz, don't @ me
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Wren wrote: »
    Graves wrote: »
    Me or Shibby?

    you

    I dont think shibby used 2 in anything
    I didn't use the number, I said second.

    maybe. I rarely read your posts

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    bowen wrote: »
    www.neutrogenawave.com

    The discreet vibrator disguised as a facial exfoliater?
    Any back massager or something that vibrates is a discreet vibrator.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    i've never fallen asleep jerkin' it

    but i have woken up jerkin' it

    i thought to myself what the fuck am i doing?

    crwth on
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  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    I've stopped jerking because I've been too tired to finish. Morning comes with morning wood that tossed off my blanket and demanded attention. I was scared of it's threatening stare, I finished the deed scared for my life and tears in my eyes.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • IskanderIskander Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I like snuggling with a girl and then start feeling her up. Sleepy moans turn into 'I wanna sleep'

    I sleep molest my fiance all the time. I just suddenly wake up and I'm feeling her up.

    Fuck sometimes I just wait for her to fall asleep and then I'm all over her

    Sometimes that wakes her up horny
    Other times it wakes her up grumpy

    It's a 50:50 chance for sex, so I figure what the hell

    Iskander on
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Horrible Visalia, CARegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    Grumpy sex isn't as fun as angry sex.

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • IskanderIskander Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    i have never had angry sex before

    Iskander on
  • Synthetic OrangeSynthetic Orange Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Janson wrote: »
    Man

    Ear/neck nibbles are awesome

    Chewing and licking my ears quickly reduces me to a paralysed blob. It's one of the best things.

    Synthetic Orange on
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Angry sex is awesome but I usually go back to being angry like ten minutes afterwards

    Sometimes it's a great problem-solver, though

    Fandyien on
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This discussion has been closed.