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Terrible Sex

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Posts

  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    gonna call you poopdick from now on

    can't say that never happened :(

    and i was like hey you know how about i use a condom?

    she was like no condom
    Did she at least flush her shit out first?

    hahahaha

    oh my no

    well maybe, but not all the time i guess
    You never pulled your dick out to find it full of poo did you?

    refer to the first and second lines of this quote tree (yes)

    crwth on
    EzUAYcn.png
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    2 ice cream sandwiches is definitely better than 1, FYI

    Houk the Namebringer on
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Man, I feel bad for you. I would hate to have been you in that situation, I mean how can a guy turn down sticking his dick in a hole, but if she didn't let you wear a condom, that must have been some pretty interesting sex.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
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  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ugh getting poo up your dick seems like a bad bad bad bad idea

    Raneados on
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    and it doesn't smell none too great i'll tell ya what

    crwth on
    EzUAYcn.png
  • Bowler HatBowler Hat Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    crwth wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    gonna call you poopdick from now on

    can't say that never happened :(

    and i was like hey you know how about i use a condom?

    she was like no condom
    Did she at least flush her shit out first?

    hahahaha

    oh my no

    well maybe, but not all the time i guess
    You never pulled your dick out to find it full of poo did you?

    refer to the first and second lines of this quote tree (yes)

    was it worth it?

    Bowler Hat on
  • Agent VesagoAgent Vesago Half Iago. Half Fu Manchu. All Bastard. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I have never been down with the anal.

    Agent Vesago on
    Clowns.jpg
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Bowler Hat wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    crwth wrote: »
    lostwords wrote: »
    gonna call you poopdick from now on

    can't say that never happened :(

    and i was like hey you know how about i use a condom?

    she was like no condom
    Did she at least flush her shit out first?

    hahahaha

    oh my no

    well maybe, but not all the time i guess
    You never pulled your dick out to find it full of poo did you?

    refer to the first and second lines of this quote tree (yes)

    was it worth it?

    sure, i guess

    i don't regret it or anything like that, i just coulda gone without poo on my weewee

    crwth on
    EzUAYcn.png
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Agent Vesago wrote: »
    I have never been down with the anal.

    Beggers shouldn't be choosers

    RocketSauce on
  • ZombotZombot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    You always wrap it up before you take a dive down the hershey highway.
    Always!

    Zombot on
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Beggers can be choosers, they just won't always get what they want.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
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  • JedocJedoc In the scuppers with the staggers and jagsRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    RocketSauce wrote: »
    Agent Vesago wrote: »
    I have never been down with the anal.

    Buggerers shouldn't be choosers

    Jedoc on
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  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Beggers can be choosers, they just won't always get what they want.

    So whatever happened to you and the redhead after she broke up you and your kids' mom.

    RocketSauce on
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Beggers can be choosers, they just won't always get what they want.
    Yes, thank you for making the already-obvious meaning even more obvious and trite.

    Houk the Namebringer on
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
    plnre-1.jpg
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    it amazes me how many of you have crazy stupid misconceptions about anal

    I mean, just think for a moment that there are plenty of people that engage in it that don't have any problems and you should realize that either the concerns you have don't actually apply, or that there's a fairly simple solution to them

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    that sucks

    crwth on
    EzUAYcn.png
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    lots of people dress up in animal costumes and jump into giant fur piles as well

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    is it better to have terrible sex or to not have sex at all

    Meissnerd on
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    the fact that you're trying to play the victim here convinces me that you're pretty much just as stupid now as you were then

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • beavotronbeavotron Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Wren wrote: »
    lots of people dress up in animal costumes and jump into giant fur piles as well

    yiff yiff yiff

    beavotron on
  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    Ouch.

    Mine was one of my best friends, and it effectively killed our friendship as my girlfriend didn't want her around (rightly so). Too bad, really, we were good friends.

    RocketSauce on
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    beavotron wrote: »
    Wren wrote: »
    lots of people dress up in animal costumes and jump into giant fur piles as well

    yiff yiff yiff

    well if you insist

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    the fact that you're trying to play the victim here convinces me that you're pretty much just as stupid now as you were then
    I am not trying to play the victim, I know I fucked up, and in all reality I only fucked myself the worst in all of it.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
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  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    is it better to have terrible sex or to not have sex at all

    Having a terrible sex story is good.

    Having a story about not having sex at all is sad.

    RocketSauce on
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    it's almost at 100

    someone tell the best horrible sex story quick

    crwth on
    EzUAYcn.png
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Meissnerd wrote: »
    is it better to have terrible sex or to not have sex at all
    i would absolutely prefer none to terrible as i could do something not terrible in the meantime

    sex is only worthwhile if it is fun and enjoyable. enduring terrible sex is like eating terrible ice cream. what's the point?

    edit: not a specific story, but man is it creepy when pets watch you have sex. my ex in college had a big golden lab who would stare at us and i could tell it was just waiting to jump in.

    then my more recent ex had a cat that would sit on the bed and stare at my balls like it was hoping to claw the shit out of them. fuck that cat.

    Houk the Namebringer on
  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22

    Raneados on
  • WrenWren ninja_bird Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I hope we don't get an other one of these

    you showoffs

    Wren on
    tf2sig.jpg
    TF2 - Wren BF3: Wren-fu
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    I was stupid and didn't wear a contraceptive.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
    plnre-1.jpg
  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    the fact that you're trying to play the victim here convinces me that you're pretty much just as stupid now as you were then
    I am not trying to play the victim, I know I fucked up, and in all reality I only fucked myself the worst in all of it.
    then she's no more of a whore then you are
    I mean, she wasn't the one that was cheating (unless she was also married)

    Druhim on
    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • Mr. Henry BemisMr. Henry Bemis God is love Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    plenty of people have two children by that time

    planned, even

    Mr. Henry Bemis on
    Nothing is true; Everything is permitted
  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    I was stupid and didn't wear a contraceptive.

    HOW DID YOU GET TWO

    Raneados on
  • Houk the NamebringerHouk the Namebringer Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    I was stupid and didn't wear a contraceptive.
    that explains the first one

    stupid doesnt even begin to explain how it happened again

    Houk the Namebringer on
  • RaneadosRaneados police apologist you shouldn't have been there, obviouslyRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mr. Henry Bemis wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    plenty of people have two children by that time

    planned, even

    it's info like this that will feature heavily alongside Rane's Plan To Kill 80% Of The World

    Raneados on
  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    he's got twins

    it happened once

    crwth on
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  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Druhim wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    She stayed my ex's best friend, seeing as she is the one who told her all about it, the whore.

    the fact that you're trying to play the victim here convinces me that you're pretty much just as stupid now as you were then
    I am not trying to play the victim, I know I fucked up, and in all reality I only fucked myself the worst in all of it.
    then she's no more of a whore then you are
    I mean, she wasn't the one that was cheating (unless she was also married)
    Well yes I am a whore, I did cheat on my ex a lot, and I know that makes me a horrible person and all, and no she wasn't cheating, and I do take all the blame, but I can still call her a whore because that is what she does, she fucks a lot of guys.
    We weren't married I was engaged though.

    To Slip Away on
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  • langfor6langfor6 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I once had a friend who got thrown in jail for drunk driving. The night that he got out of jail, he went to the bar again, and got arrested a second time for drunk driving.

    Now that was stupid.

    langfor6 on
  • To Slip AwayTo Slip Away __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Raneados wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    I was stupid and didn't wear a contraceptive.

    HOW DID YOU GET TWO
    Houk wrote: »
    To Slip Away wrote: »
    Raneados wrote: »
    WHY DO YOU HAVE KIDS

    S

    KID S

    AT LEAST TWO KIDS

    AT 22
    I was stupid and didn't wear a contraceptive.
    that explains the first one

    stupid doesnt even begin to explain how it happened again

    It only needed to happen once, they were twins.

    To Slip Away on
    CureSig2-1.jpg
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  • beavotronbeavotron Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    how do you see how many times you've posted in a thread?
    i'm worried that i may have posted more in this thread than any other thread in the penny arcade forums ever.

    beavotron on
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Penny Arcade Forums› Social Entropy++