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Reverse Illiteracy Thread

2456762

Posts

  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Frequently not in boats. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    PiptheFair on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.
    Man, dragonlance is just as terrible, just in plain english.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    Nice try.

    sarukun on
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.
    Man, dragonlance is just as terrible, just in plain english.

    Fantasy Literature in general is an exercise in wanting to gouge out your own eyes.

    sarukun on
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • DoodmannDoodmann Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    also what the fuck is wrong with Thompson?

    Doodmann on
    Whippy wrote: »
    nope nope nope nope abort abort talk about anime
    Sometimes I sell my stuff on Ebay
  • BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    How about any R.L. Stine book?

    go get another staph infection

    Balefuego on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • heretoinformheretoinform __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Balefuego wrote: »
    How about any R.L. Stine book?

    go get another staph infection

    hohoho

    why would i want to do that?

    heretoinform on
    Socialism is the concrete foundation of America. Capitalism is the flimsy tin shack that sits upon it.
  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Balefuego wrote: »
    How about any R.L. Stine book?

    go get another staph infection

    I still have the one about the vampire sponge thing and a couple others stashed away in the closet
    Good times

    Me Too! on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    so I need to pick up this third book in a series by this guy called John C. Wright. It's about these five British kids that are raised in an orphanage, but are apparently the children of some greek gods being kept under a sort of house arrest by other gods, and their powers are all different and discussions of them often go into weird physics involving the 4th and 5th dimensions and I don't even know what. It's pretty decent, and has some erotic spanking in it.

    Also Grendel.

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • redheadredhead Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Going straight from Cormack McCarthy to Nabokov is weird. They're both fucking fantastic, though, so I'm not complaining.

    The class that's having me read or reread these authors is the first really good English class I've ever taken, too. And next we're doing some Faulkner, which should be great. I've actually never read anything of his other than The Sound and the Fury, but I read that twice back to back and loved it. I sort of had to read it twice to "get" it, but I'm glad I did anyway.

    redhead on
  • <3<3 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I should read some more Neil Gaiman stuff.

    <3 on
  • Spectre-xSpectre-x Rating: AWESOME YESRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.

    LotR is poorly written, but the whole mythology behind it is fairly fantastically elaborate and that's why I like it.

    Great ideas, poor writing.

    Spectre-x on
  • ZombotZombot Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Nearly every Goosebumps book had a twist ending, three or four pages before the end of the book.
    It got to a point where I would read the end of the book first to find out the terrible twist so I wouldn't get that involved with the plot.

    Zombot on
  • sponospono Mining for Nose Diamonds Booger CoveRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    so I need to pick up this third book in a series by this guy called John C. Wright. It's about these five British kids that are raised in an orphanage, but are apparently the children of some greek gods being kept under a sort of house arrest by other gods, and their powers are all different and discussions of them often go into weird physics involving the 4th and 5th dimensions and I don't even know what. It's pretty decent, and has some erotic spanking in it.

    Also Grendel.

    wait is grendel in the book with the british kids?

    that'd be great

    spono on
    640qocnq4ske.gif
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    The Sound and the Fury seems like the kind of book I need my hand held through, like all of Shakespeares' work. They're both great writers and all, but if I'm left to my own devices, I'm going to say "Fuck it" and read a Louis L'Amore novel.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Who else read Christopher Pike in grade school? That shit was sexy when you were 11.

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    I loved Christopher Pike
    There were a couple about skateboarding that were rad as hell

    Me Too! on
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    spono wrote: »
    Mysst wrote: »
    so I need to pick up this third book in a series by this guy called John C. Wright. It's about these five British kids that are raised in an orphanage, but are apparently the children of some greek gods being kept under a sort of house arrest by other gods, and their powers are all different and discussions of them often go into weird physics involving the 4th and 5th dimensions and I don't even know what. It's pretty decent, and has some erotic spanking in it.

    Also Grendel.

    wait is grendel in the book with the british kids?

    that'd be great
    yeah, he's always tying the girls up

    Mysst on
    ikbUJdU.jpg
  • sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Spectre-x wrote: »
    LotR is poorly written, but the whole mythology behind it is fairly fantastically elaborate and that's why I like it.

    Great ideas, poor writing.

    The writing wasn't THAT bad, but the guy was a scholar who wrote analytical papers on a long dead language for a living


    hardly surprising that his prose was.... clunky.

    sarukun on
  • heretoinformheretoinform __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Daniel Pinkwater was awesome when I was in middle school.

    heretoinform on
    Socialism is the concrete foundation of America. Capitalism is the flimsy tin shack that sits upon it.
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Spectre-x wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.

    LotR is poorly written, but the whole mythology behind it is fairly fantastically elaborate and that's why I like it.

    Great ideas, poor writing.
    I think that's true with most people.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Daniel Pinkwater was awesome when I was in middle school.

    Daniel Pinkwater is always awesome and you will show respect
    I still laugh at Borgel and Alan Mendelson and a couple others
    Not the Snarkout Boys books
    Those were just fucking weird

    Me Too! on
  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Me Too! wrote: »
    I loved Christopher Pike
    There were a couple about skateboarding that were rad as hell

    I read Monster in like the 4th or 5th grade and in between killings there was a whole lotta teenage sex going on in that story.

    My older sister saw the book in my bag and was all "Wait! Are you reading that? You can't it's got...stuff in it."

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
  • sponospono Mining for Nose Diamonds Booger CoveRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Mysst wrote: »
    spono wrote: »
    Mysst wrote: »
    so I need to pick up this third book in a series by this guy called John C. Wright. It's about these five British kids that are raised in an orphanage, but are apparently the children of some greek gods being kept under a sort of house arrest by other gods, and their powers are all different and discussions of them often go into weird physics involving the 4th and 5th dimensions and I don't even know what. It's pretty decent, and has some erotic spanking in it.

    Also Grendel.

    wait is grendel in the book with the british kids?

    that'd be great
    yeah, he's always tying the girls up

    Beowulf: "That's our grendel!"

    laugh track

    credits

    A Miller-Boyet Production

    spono on
    640qocnq4ske.gif
  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Butters wrote: »
    Me Too! wrote: »
    I loved Christopher Pike
    There were a couple about skateboarding that were rad as hell

    I read Monster in like the 4th or 5th grade and in between killings there was a whole lotta teenage sex going on in that story.

    My older sister saw the book in my bag and was all "Wait! Are you reading that? You can't it's got...stuff in it."

    Huh. Don't think I ever read that one

    Me Too! on
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    That reminds me of all of those Aliens novels I read when I was ten or eleven. They said the f-word and killed a lot of things and sometimes there was even sex. It was like a discovered a whole secret world that made me smarter than my parents, since they didn't know about it.

    Those were fun books.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.
    I wanted to punch you in the kidneys for making this thread, as several of the books on that list have no business there.

    But then I read this exchange, and now I have a confusing stirring in my pants.

    naporeon on
  • vsovevsove ....also yes. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    That reminds me of all of those Aliens novels I read when I was ten or eleven. They said the f-word and killed a lot of things and sometimes there was even sex. It was like a discovered a whole secret world that made me smarter than my parents, since they didn't know about it.

    Those were fun books.

    I remember Aliens: Labyrinth where they were cross-breeding Aliens and humans. This was before the fourth movie, and I'd never read the comics so I thought the idea was fresh and exciting.

    vsove on
    WATCH THIS SPACE.
  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    it's the too good for the inventor of the modern fantasy novel thread

    Kuribo's Shoe on
    xmassig2.gif
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    naporeon wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.
    I wanted to punch you in the kidneys for making this thread, as several of the books on that list have no business there.

    But then I read this exchange, and now I have a confusing stirring in my pants.
    Sometimes love means having to sock someone in the kidneys.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I remember those Aliens books

    Balefuego on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • vsovevsove ....also yes. Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I also read the Doom books, so my literary tastes as a child are quite suspect.

    Though I do remember being horribly disturbed by a guy going through a teleporter in one of the Doom books and transforming into a massive quivering blob of protoplasm. That was quite disturbing.

    vsove on
    WATCH THIS SPACE.
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    There wasn't nearly enough AvP books for my tastes. I used to love the AvP series.

    Then the bad Paul Anderson broke into my house at night and touched my balls.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • ButtersButters A glass of some milks Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    naporeon wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.
    I wanted to punch you in the kidneys for making this thread, as several of the books on that list have no business there.

    But then I read this exchange, and now I have a confusing stirring in my pants.

    Hey where's that kid flipped his shit when you called Tolkien a bad writer in his thread? The one that accused Silmaril of never reading LotR?

    Butters on
    PSN: idontworkhere582 | CFN: idontworkhere | Steam: lordbutters | Amazon Wishlist
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Butters wrote: »
    naporeon wrote: »
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    And Tolkien is awful. Anyone that thinks otherwise is objectively wrong. There is nothing redeemable about Tolkien's writing, I mean other than the fact that we got some wonderful Dragonlance novels out of the deal.

    get out

    Pip, you've only demonstrated that you hate one of the greatest living authors on Earth and that you hate Faulkner. Your poor taste is only amplified by the fact that you think bad-mouthing a man that wrote a twelve-hundred page book on walking and bad poetry is unacceptable.

    You are terrible at books. There are lead-paint ridden blind children with a better grasp on literature than you do.
    I wanted to punch you in the kidneys for making this thread, as several of the books on that list have no business there.

    But then I read this exchange, and now I have a confusing stirring in my pants.

    Hey where's that kid flipped his shit when you called Tolkien a bad writer in his thread? The one that accused Silmaril of never reading LotR?
    Do you mean this thread?

    Yeah, that was pretty great.

    naporeon on
  • Me Too!Me Too! __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2008
    Guys he's in this thread
    He's here
    I smell a sitcom!

    Me Too! on
  • Penguin IncarnatePenguin Incarnate King of Kafiristan Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Wow. That post tree looks like Dresden.

    I'm not sure that kid was even posting in English, though. It was like someone was transcribing cave paintings into forum posts.

    Penguin Incarnate on
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Me Too! wrote: »
    Guys he's in this thread
    He's here
    I smell a sitcom!
    THE CALL IS COMING FROM HERE

    INSIDE THE HOUSE

    naporeon on
  • naporeonnaporeon Seattle, WARegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Also, where is Pooro?

    Somebody get Pooro.

    naporeon on
This discussion has been closed.