Get a misting spray bottle full of water, then give a slice of wheat bread one solid spray. Lightly sprinkle a standard cinnamon-sugar mix over the bread. Toast. After toasting, give the bread a light run of honey, eat by hand.
That's like saying going to the dentist is awesome because many awesome people go to the dentist.
And I'm saying masturbation is generally a pretty not-awesome activity. I am assuming a standard level of awesome, a level too low to make jerkin' it or otherwise touching yourself awesome.
I dunno man, taken at their face value I would say mutual masturbation is even less awesome than masturbation. Phone sex, on the other hand, is clearly better/more awesome than either one.
Also, where in the dark holes of the internet do you find this picture, DP?
Curly_Brace on
0
#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
edited April 2009
when you say mutual masturbation
do you mean you're giving each other manual stimulation
or that you're both rubbing one out at the same time?
cause I gotta tell ya I would not be comfortable with the second one at all
but who knows? maybe in ten years I'll look back on tonight and say to myself, "ben, old bean, you should have gone partying instead of spending the night listening to hannah montana and insulting pooro"
unlikely, though
oh, you most certainly will feel you missed out, hard.
you probably will lie pretty effectively about it, even to yourself, though, so it's not that much of a problem
Also, the right thing to do about nude pictures in a relationship is for both partners to have them
That way, you can keep up the fear of mutually assured social deconstruction
and jesus your sig is horrible, %member number 7014%
My mother and I have reached that weird point where we talk like adults but she still has her "OMG MY LITTLE GIRL" moments.
So a few weekends back, I took a (rare) night off of work to go see some Professional Bull Riding Built Ford Tough Series Lots of Capitalized Words Qualifying Events series with her.
Later, with a bottle of wine in a hotel, we got onto the subject, SOMEHOW, of uncircumsized penises (which, by the way, I landslide prefer over the mutilated kind). She mentioned how she, too, prefers her penises to be un-cut and wished the hospital hadn't cut my brother when she was out after delivering him.
Now, knowing my brother is cut = not a big deal. Lots of North Dakota swimming holes and whatnot growing up, I already knew THAT. But my mother has only slept with two people. My dad, and her recently-ex-husband. Believe you me, the weird knowledge that one is cut and one isn't has bothered me. And more than that, my brain's constant revisitation of the query as to whether it was my father or my step dad with the superior, un-mutilated member has been quite a bother. Because who cares.
Apparently, me. If she wouldn't have brought that shit up, I would have NEVER thought of it.
Ignorance could be bliss, if it meant I never had to think about my dad's cock.
I was thinking about carving it into the ham, since I won't be eating that dead pig anyway.
Regarding circumcision: There is no argument. Nature got it right and science got it wrong. BUT, all dicks are fun regardless of what misguided science has done (or not done) to them. yaaay, dicks!
PS: I'm sure if my mother loved the internet like I do, she could write PAGES about things she would have remained blissfully ignorant of if I had not started talking to her like I was an adult (i.e. rim jobs, tattoo processes, anal sex, vibrators, genital piercings, ritual suspensions, picking at third degree burns, flavored condoms, contraceptive jelly, etc. etc. etc.).
Posts
i hurt my right hand slam dunking a basketball yesterday and i can't grip things
and lefty sucks
but i won't get to sleep until i ejaculate
She's a total vegetarian weirdo hippie.
You gotta bend as faaaaaar as you can.
And you gotta lick the tip.
Until it gets you off.
kpop appreciation station i also like to tweet some
plastic bag, lotion, and some pillows
Wow, so you hurt yourself my being amazingly awesome? Not gonna get a lot of sympathy here, I'm afraid.
Also, ewwww. How can you be awesome AND masturbate? Those things just dont go together.
some people are awesome
some awesome people masturbate
Tumblr blargh
because that is what I'm seeing here
Tumblr blargh
And I'm saying masturbation is generally a pretty not-awesome activity. I am assuming a standard level of awesome, a level too low to make jerkin' it or otherwise touching yourself awesome.
Pffft, I wish.
Tumblr blargh
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
mutual masturbation feels nice
edit: hivemind DP
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opinions
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what you NEED to got is
drawing sexy optimus prime
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
Tumblr blargh
Also, where in the dark holes of the internet do you find this picture, DP?
do you mean you're giving each other manual stimulation
or that you're both rubbing one out at the same time?
cause I gotta tell ya I would not be comfortable with the second one at all
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
oh, you most certainly will feel you missed out, hard.
you probably will lie pretty effectively about it, even to yourself, though, so it's not that much of a problem
Can never have enough.
Some Japanese artist's site. Don't remember the URL.
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
That way, you can keep up the fear of mutually assured social deconstruction
and jesus your sig is horrible, %member number 7014%
So a few weekends back, I took a (rare) night off of work to go see some Professional Bull Riding Built Ford Tough Series Lots of Capitalized Words Qualifying Events series with her.
Later, with a bottle of wine in a hotel, we got onto the subject, SOMEHOW, of uncircumsized penises (which, by the way, I landslide prefer over the mutilated kind). She mentioned how she, too, prefers her penises to be un-cut and wished the hospital hadn't cut my brother when she was out after delivering him.
Now, knowing my brother is cut = not a big deal. Lots of North Dakota swimming holes and whatnot growing up, I already knew THAT. But my mother has only slept with two people. My dad, and her recently-ex-husband. Believe you me, the weird knowledge that one is cut and one isn't has bothered me. And more than that, my brain's constant revisitation of the query as to whether it was my father or my step dad with the superior, un-mutilated member has been quite a bother. Because who cares.
Apparently, me. If she wouldn't have brought that shit up, I would have NEVER thought of it.
Ignorance could be bliss, if it meant I never had to think about my dad's cock.
I might ask her on Easter.
Paint the question on an easter egg
Tumblr blargh
edit: rob that reminds me of a simpsons line that always made me giggle
"Everything here is something"
Need some stuff designed or printed? I can help with that.
Ah Jesus, I was seriously about to make a long post vis-a-vi my opinions on male circumcision.
Practically half my infractions are from circumcision threads.
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
Tumblr blargh
cutting your posting in half!
EDIT: God damn it.
I was thinking about carving it into the ham, since I won't be eating that dead pig anyway.
Regarding circumcision: There is no argument. Nature got it right and science got it wrong. BUT, all dicks are fun regardless of what misguided science has done (or not done) to them. yaaay, dicks!
PS: I'm sure if my mother loved the internet like I do, she could write PAGES about things she would have remained blissfully ignorant of if I had not started talking to her like I was an adult (i.e. rim jobs, tattoo processes, anal sex, vibrators, genital piercings, ritual suspensions, picking at third degree burns, flavored condoms, contraceptive jelly, etc. etc. etc.).
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar