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The Contest - A question

2»

Posts

  • FramlingFramling Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Shiosai wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    A) bad thread.


    B) Every retard knows it is absolutely no sexual gratification of any kind, be it involving another person, or doing it yourself.
    A) Intentional.

    B) Hold it! I would like you to consider that an active sex life might put one at a disadvantage in a masturbation contest.

    Well, if the rules disqualify you for any orgasm, yeah, I could see having sex being something of a disadvantage. At least, in terms of winning the contest.

    Framling on
    you're = you are
    your = belonging to you

    their = belonging to them
    there = not here
    they're = they are
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Drez wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    why do people like Seinfeld?

    I'd like to know this as well. Let's hijack this in the name of Seinfeld bashing.

    Are you going to fault him for telling jokes ten years ago that you don't find funny today?

    Huh? I didn't find them funny ten years ago, either. I admit the show had its quirks. I really enjoyed Jason Alexander on it. But c'mon. I read Jerry's stand-up one-liners book and it's the goddamn dumbest piece of shit "comedy" I've ever had the unfortunate displeasure to scan with my eyes.

    What you are basically saying is that you don't like mashed potatoes.


    Well, dude, some people like mashed potatoes.

    Jerry is not mashed potatoes. He's more like, I dunno, brussel sprouts.
    Some people like brussel sprouts.


    I actually do not think they are all that bad.

    sarukun on
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Shiosai wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    "The contest" was not a masturbation contest. It was a "no sexual gratification" contest.
    No it wasn't. If you watched the episode or read the wiki link you would know this.

    Also, what did you guys do for prizes? I mean what's a good enough thing to win that's worth trying in this contest, but isn't too god dammed expensive?
    I did watch the episode. I'm positive they had a discussion about sexual encounters outside of maturbation and whether they were allowed.

    sarukun on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    why do people like Seinfeld?

    I'd like to know this as well. Let's hijack this in the name of Seinfeld bashing.

    Are you going to fault him for telling jokes ten years ago that you don't find funny today?

    Huh? I didn't find them funny ten years ago, either. I admit the show had its quirks. I really enjoyed Jason Alexander on it. But c'mon. I read Jerry's stand-up one-liners book and it's the goddamn dumbest piece of shit "comedy" I've ever had the unfortunate displeasure to scan with my eyes.

    What you are basically saying is that you don't like mashed potatoes.


    Well, dude, some people like mashed potatoes.

    Jerry is not mashed potatoes. He's more like, I dunno, brussel sprouts.
    Some people like brussel sprouts.


    I actually do not think they are all that bad.

    Some people do. Most people do not.

    However, everyone loves mashed potatoes. Anyone that doesn't should immediately die.

    Do you see, now, why your analogy was a complete failure and that you should probably die along with anyone that doesn't like mashed potatoes?

    Do you? Do you?!?!

    Drez on
  • ShiosaiShiosai Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2007
    Framling wrote:
    Well, if the rules disqualify you for any orgasm, yeah, I could see having sex being something of a disadvantage. At least, in terms of winning the contest.
    Good idea :^:
    sarukun wrote:
    I did watch the episode. I'm positive they had a discussion about sexual encounters outside of maturbation and whether they were allowed.
    Eh, watch it again (I linked it in the first post). It doesn't state those guidelines, which is the source of my quandary.

    Shiosai on
    60353019xm5.jpg
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    Yeah I wasn't a big fan of Jerry Seinfeld all that much myself. Mostly I liked the eccentric third party characters.

    Pretty much everyone on the show except for Jerry was one of those people.

    Jerry did some weird, neurotic shit as well.

    Defender on
    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • MonkeybombMonkeybomb Registered User
    edited February 2007
    I say we do this contest and start right now because my girlfriend's period just started. So I'm in it for a couple of days anyway.

    No, I don't like bloody menses sex.

    Monkeybomb on
    Xbox Live Gamertag: Triplemonkeybom
    monkeysig-1.jpg
  • FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY EVERY DAYRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    i lose if i have to think of shiosai every time i think of the contest :oops:

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • AHH!AHH! Registered User
    edited February 2007
    I've gone 3 days once

    I needed about 4 tissues

    AHH! on
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Drez wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    why do people like Seinfeld?

    I'd like to know this as well. Let's hijack this in the name of Seinfeld bashing.

    Are you going to fault him for telling jokes ten years ago that you don't find funny today?

    Huh? I didn't find them funny ten years ago, either. I admit the show had its quirks. I really enjoyed Jason Alexander on it. But c'mon. I read Jerry's stand-up one-liners book and it's the goddamn dumbest piece of shit "comedy" I've ever had the unfortunate displeasure to scan with my eyes.

    What you are basically saying is that you don't like mashed potatoes.


    Well, dude, some people like mashed potatoes.

    Jerry is not mashed potatoes. He's more like, I dunno, brussel sprouts.
    Some people like brussel sprouts.


    I actually do not think they are all that bad.

    Some people do. Most people do not.

    However, everyone loves mashed potatoes. Anyone that doesn't should immediately die.

    Do you see, now, why your analogy was a complete failure and that you should probably die along with anyone that doesn't like mashed potatoes?

    Do you? Do you?!?!

    The analogy was sound in that some people like mashed potatoes, and others do not.

    But you're right that anyone that doesn't like mashed potates is probably a hippie and needs to die.

    sarukun on
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited February 2007
    Monkeybomb wrote:
    I say we do this contest and start right now because my girlfriend's period just started. So I'm in it for a couple of days anyway.

    No, I don't like bloody menses sex.

    what are you monkey

    mormon?

    Rankenphile on
  • RonjonRonjon Registered User
    edited February 2007
    Monkeybomb wrote:
    I say we do this contest and start right now because my girlfriend's period just started. So I'm in it for a couple of days anyway.

    No, I don't like bloody menses sex.

    what are you monkey

    mormon?
    it's just like fucking a raw steak, it's manly.

    Ronjon on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Shiosai wrote:
    Framling wrote:
    Well, if the rules disqualify you for any orgasm, yeah, I could see having sex being something of a disadvantage. At least, in terms of winning the contest.
    Good idea :^:
    sarukun wrote:
    I did watch the episode. I'm positive they had a discussion about sexual encounters outside of maturbation and whether they were allowed.
    Eh, watch it again (I linked it in the first post). It doesn't state those guidelines, which is the source of my quandary.

    Damn.


    That concerns me, because I can see George, Elaine, Kramer, and Jerry conversing about the specifics of the contest, and I now have no idea where that memory comes from.

    sarukun on
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    yeah let's do this contest the week of Valentine's Day.

    Sorry hon, not tonight.

    I have to win an internet contest.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Defender wrote:
    sarukun wrote:
    Yeah I wasn't a big fan of Jerry Seinfeld all that much myself. Mostly I liked the eccentric third party characters.

    Pretty much everyone on the show except for Jerry was one of those people.

    Jerry did some weird, neurotic shit as well.

    Yeah, but he didn't really have a gimmick.


    He had the "What's the deal with etc.", but that's mostly his stand-up persona.

    I guess Elain didn't *really* have a gimmick either, but pretty much every other character on the show did.

    sarukun on
  • PojacoPojaco Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    I went a month once, it hurt.

    Also, has anyone tried to calculate how many times they think they've done it in their entire lives?

    I come up with about 4,500 :oops:

    Pojaco on
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Pojaco wrote:
    I went a month once, it hurt.

    Also, has anyone tried to calculate how many times they think they've done it in their entire lives?

    I come up with about 4,500 :oops:

    Why would you do that?


    That's like trying to figure out how many times you ordered pizza?


    Who cares, the real question is, when's the NEXT time I order pizza?

    sarukun on
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Pojaco wrote:
    I went a month once, it hurt.

    Also, has anyone tried to calculate how many times they think they've done it in their entire lives?

    I come up with about 4,500 :oops:

    I'm looking at an average of once a day for 17 years which comes to 6,205. I'm a goddamned machine.

    edit: sarukun, I'll be "ordering pizza" tonight.

    Darth Waiter on
    darthsig.jpg
  • PojacoPojaco Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Pojaco wrote:
    I went a month once, it hurt.

    Also, has anyone tried to calculate how many times they think they've done it in their entire lives?

    I come up with about 4,500 :oops:

    I'm looking at an average of once a day for 17 years which comes to 6,205. I'm a goddamned machine.
    I like to do this with beer too

    Pojaco on
  • StarfuckStarfuck Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2007
    i've been jacking off since most of you were in diapers

    Starfuck on
    jackfaces
    "If you're going to play tiddly winks, play it with man hole covers."
    - John McCallum
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Starfuck wrote:
    i've been jacking off since most of you were in diapers

    There's an "Orca Stacks" joke in there some where.


    Damn, now I really want to eat pizza and masturbate.

    sarukun on
  • Darkblade_1Darkblade_1 __BANNED USERS
    edited February 2007
    Jordyn I need something odd and random to do with your sig..

    I think I'm gunna make his thumbs fire into the air like little rockets..

    Darkblade_1 on
    iveseenvivstits.gif
    You're drawn to my eccentric Brawl Code: 4596 9143 4529
  • Darth WaiterDarth Waiter Elrond Hubbard Mordor XenuRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Starfuck wrote:
    i've been jacking off since most of you were in diapers

    I was having the same thought, except "in diapers" changes to "in the womb."

    Darth Waiter on
    darthsig.jpg
  • FramlingFramling Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Starfuck wrote:
    i've been jacking off since most of you were in diapers

    That's... just... the way you phrased that...

    it uh.... it sounded...

    nevermind.

    Framling on
    you're = you are
    your = belonging to you

    their = belonging to them
    there = not here
    they're = they are
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited February 2007
    Framling wrote:
    Starfuck wrote:
    i've been jacking off since most of you were in diapers

    That's... just... the way you phrased that...

    it uh.... it sounded...

    nevermind.

    okay, good

    I wasn't the only one

    Rankenphile on
  • JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Shiosai was your timing with this contest prompted by my ex

    Janson on
    sig.jpg
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    I've masturbated approximately 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    Drez on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Drez wrote:
    On average, I've masturbated 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    How is that an average?

    Defender on
    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator mod
    edited February 2007
    off the top of my head, I'd guess that I've probably jerked it a buttload

    Rankenphile on
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    On average, I've masturbated 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    How is that an average?

    I was just coming to edit that but I was busy masturbating.

    Drez on
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    On average, I've masturbated 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    How is that an average?

    He meant "rough estimate".

    sarukun on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    On average, I've masturbated 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    How is that an average?

    He meant "rough estimate".

    OK.

    Defender on
    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    On average, I've masturbated 18,250 times in the last 10 years.

    How is that an average?

    He meant "rough estimate".

    Yeah. Emphasis on "rough." Because that's how I like it.

    Drez on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Jerkin' it rough
    Makin' it into rawhide

    Defender on
    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • sarukunsarukun Mr. Bulldopps Get SchwiftyRegistered User regular
    edited February 2007
    Defender wrote:
    all jerkin' it rough
    all makin' it into basically rawhide

    Roast Beef'd

    sarukun on
  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited February 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    all jerkin' it rough
    all makin' it into basically rawhide

    Roast Beef'd

    :-)

    Nice.

    Defender on
    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • DynagripDynagrip destroy everything you touch Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2007
    Shiosai wrote:
    Ok, most people have seen this classic episode of Seinfeld and know exactly what I'm talking about. For the people who don't know, there's even a wiki article on it.

    So I seem to recall this forum (I can't remember if it was SE++ or D&D) had this contest though the search feature has failed me and perhaps the thread was pruned or my variables suck.

    At any rate, I was planning on creating this contest with some friends of mine, but we noticed the episode is unclear on how sex factors in. Does an active sex life disqualify you from the contest, or does sex != masturbation and hence fit into a different realm entirely.

    For this question, I decided I must consult the denizens of SE++
    D&D had one. I didn't enter.

    Dynagrip on
    ok98TNK.png
  • Carl with a KCarl with a K Registered User
    edited February 2007
    i love seinfeld

    Carl with a K on
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