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A Long Running Rivalry
Dread Pirate Arbuthnot
OMG WRIGGLYT O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
OMG WRIGGLYT O X O P L A S M O S I SRegistered User regular
Okay, this is not a standard "lol how do I put laxatives in someones coffee" thread. If a mod feels otherwise, he can lock it down.
My brother is 24. I'm 16. Our little sister/big brother dynamic pretty much boils down to the fact that we have been pulling a series of pranks on each other that runs back to when I was twelve and I got Never Blow Out candles for his birthday cake, so he got to embarass himself in front of his friends.
Some of the pranks have been pretty elaborate, but we do have ground rules, which generally boil down to that it must be easy for at least two people to fix, and that it cannot be illegal.
For instance, he bribed my friends to 'forget' my birthday one year, I replaced every song on his iPod with the vast collection of Vanilla Ice simply renamed to his old song titles. Instead of Radiohead, he got Ice Ice Baby.
So basically, I'm looking for things along that line. Nothing dangerous, nothing violent. We live in the same condo building, but on different floors.
My brother is 24. I'm 16. Our little sister/big brother dynamic pretty much boils down to the fact that we have been pulling a series of pranks on each other that runs back to when I was twelve and I got Never Blow Out candles for his birthday cake, so he got to embarass himself in front of his friends.
Some of the pranks have been pretty elaborate, but we do have ground rules, which generally boil down to that it must be easy for at least two people to fix, and that it cannot be illegal.
For instance, he bribed my friends to 'forget' my birthday one year, I replaced every song on his iPod with the vast collection of Vanilla Ice simply renamed to his old song titles. Instead of Radiohead, he got Ice Ice Baby.
So basically, I'm looking for things along that line. Nothing dangerous, nothing violent. We live in the same condo building, but on different floors.
Dread Pirate Arbuthnot on
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It's a pretty fuzzy-wuzzy prank, I don't know if it's effective enough for your purposes, but it's what struck me first.
Nevermind. If you really need to know what I was thinking of, PM me. It probably wasn't that funny anyway.
Wow. This is so clever. Awesome.
I think ArrBeeBee struck a home run off the first bat (look at me all using baseball references when I don't even know if I'm saying the right thing). It's the mother of all headfucks, making him constantly watch his back just waiting for something that never even materialises.
You can even start riffing of it, like buy a big cake and offer him a piece and then just happily munch away at it when he declines. The more paranoid he gets, the better it'll be.
unscrew the air ventilation things in the ceilings/walls and stick them in there.
He'll have a lovely time trying to find them.
Although in the future if anyone wants to make a borderline thread, it's always appreciate if they spam the local mods first.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
Alternately, do this but have them set at a relatively quiet setting - for best result, have them beep only once or twice, like those watches that beep on the hour. Get a few of the same clocks, and hide them around the apartment, set to different times. The source of the quiet beep will be very difficult to locate, especially since it will beep once or twice and then stop. He'll keep hearing them though, without being able to find them. It'll drive him nuts very slowly.
Take a screenshot of his desktop and set it as the background. Then move all the icons into the recycle bin. Shrink the start bar (or hide it on top) and it'll drive him crazy.
Alternatively, a few of these ( http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/electronic/8c52/ ) scattered around could be even more annoying
To further the classic hide everything trick.
To hide the start bar effectivly the best way I find is to obviously minimize it to it's maximum, but then strech and shift the screen so it actually sits off the screen so they can't see it.
If you have access to his keys it's always fun to break into someone elses house and grab all the cereal boxes and swap them round for random fun eating during breakfast time.
Or Boil all of his eggs then put them back in the fridge, or drill and blow all of his eggs out so they are empty, puzzlement during dinner commence!
Satans..... hints.....
Either plastic wrap, or tinfoil wrap. This is actually really funny when it's all done, but could be a bit pricy.
My suggestion:
Balloons. Lots of balloons. Fill his entire apartment with balloons. Not waist high, but to the ceiling. If you get an air tank you can do it pretty quickly.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
Keep in mind alot of this prep time can be done while in your apartment, inflate a heap, dump them in a large plastic bag and keep going. If the apartment is too big look at just doing his bedroom or bathroom.
Satans..... hints.....
Just plastic wrap bettween his toilet and the toilet seat very carefully
also, you could get the powdered fake blood stuff, and put that in the shower head, either that or toilet blueing. Fucker will look like hes a member of the blue man group all day
Funny, but legal/non-harmful stuff is the way to go!
*takes notes*
I was going to recomend changing his cellphone ringtones.
Possibly to really annoying songs, or just fart sounds. Yeah, immature I know, but quite humorous in a public place.
Of course, the down side is that this opens you to fart related reprisals.
I did this to my orchestra teacher, it was awesome. I helped him clean up afterwards. If you really want, you could use kool-aid to write something with the water, but better make sure it doesn't spill.
Cover a room/apartment/CAR in post-it notes. Car is especially fun while he is in class or at work. (I saw it done while I was playing D&D with some friends - they got 3 different cars, but thankfully not mine). Be sure to put notes in non-obvious places, like on the underside of desks and inside the gas tank cover. Added benefit that you can write messages on them.
I've never done the math, but I expect this could be cheaper than plastic wrap/foil. (I've seen foil done, it looks awesome but can't imagine the amount of time it takes).
We wrote him a nice little message on the side and windscreen of his car with stuck-on marshmellows. It was tasty, and pretty darn hilarious.
The one reason I might suggest against this is that adhesive can cause drama with car paint, I'd check by placing the stick on notes to somewhere discrete first (inside of tank cover seems to be a good one) leave for several hours and come back and double check there is no staining of the paint.
Satans..... hints.....
That's not even a safe way to tell. The primary source of trouble I suspect would be from the sun baking the adhesive into the clear coat. I really wouldn't do it to a car.
His kitchen though, maybe.
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
Hmm... maybe you could set up a hidden camera, speaker and mike next to his computer and start talking to him when he logs on. Do it right, and disguise your voice, and he might think that the computer is talking to him. The only problem with that is getting the equipment and hiding it.
Final idea: put something that will make a loud noise when squashed in his bed. The object would have to be small enough not to be seen and not be something that will hurt him, as well as being loud enough, but you could probably find something. Maybe bubble wrap or cornflakes?
Then browse to a music file that you know he hates or something. You can make it play daily at a given time.
I've also heard that putting lifesavers in the shower head works well, because they are hard to detect but will make the person feel sticky all day long.
Put some porn in somewhere that would be embarrassing to have it. For example, in the middle of a textbook he's using, in between the screen and keyboard of his laptop, etc.
If you do this, I suggest an orgasm noise of some sort. I was the victim of one such attack and dear God the timing was terrible.
I always liked those internet pranks that freak the hell out people.
Or you could doctor credit report or blood test to state some lie patrenity, Hep C, AIDS next time he goes to the doctor and has blood work done. Send him a letter saying he is getting auditted by tha man?
Also, one you might like to try is taking a banana and highlighter and writing a message on it. For instance, I wrote "SATAN IS COMING FOR YOU JOSH" on a banana and stuck it in my brother's lunch. Within about an hour it'll start to get brown where you wrote, and by morning it'll be really dark there. The banana is still completely edible, but it leaves your message in it as though it were naturally aged and completely coincidence.
And yes, I stole the idea from an SE++ thread.
Put faces on everything in their refrigerator. Or go even farther and anthropomorphize their entire apartment that way. Furniture, food, appliances, everything.
Bonus points if they all have creepy expressions and not happy ones.
Double bonus if you use googly eyes.
The harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun.
As far as computer pranks, one that I have had great success with: Take a screenshot of his computer, and make that the new desktop background. Then move all of his desktop icons into a folder and drag it offscreen so you can't really see it anymore unless you're looking for it, and roll down the start menu. "My computer's frozen, somebody fix it!" Maybe this only works on English majors like my old roommate, though.
Once my friends took apart my bed and hid pieces of it in all of their rooms.
This was something I wasn't aware of. When it was done to the cars I spoke of earlier, it was done at night. But yes, apartment rooms are just as fun
If he uses Word, you can make use of the Autocorrect function. Set it so that his name gets corrected to "Lord Autumnbottom," "is" gets corrected to "was," "dinner" gets corrected to "hard cocks." I'm sure you can think of appropriate ones.
Here's one I was really proud of- I added the following line to the bottom of my roommate's IM profile:
"Let's see how often (his name) checks his profile. If you see this, ask him what he had for breakfast, and don't tell him why."
The specific question isn't important- it should be something innocuous, that only gets suspicious when it starts happening a lot.
It might be better if you can do this on a website that a lot of his friends visit, but he almost never does himself. Or even just organize it separately with his friends, but it'd be more difficult to get it to happen at satisfactorily random intervals.
Or just turn everything in his apartment upside down.
This is fucking GOLD, especially if they don't know wtf is going on with computers.
We set this girls new laptop to do that (however, everything was replaced with SHIT COCK ASS DICK TWAT etc.) and she went fucking crazy
Building off of this idea, have him discover clues and go on a wild scavenger hunt for his parts, and after about 5 clues or 15 miles, the last clue directs him back to his apartment where his parts are well hidden and have been all along. Could be lame, or could be awesome.
If you're going to do this, make sure your recording/season pass doesn't interfere with show's he's selected. If he like TV enough to buy a TiVo, he likes it enough to pissed that he missed an episode of Heroes. I know I would be pissed if somebody reprogrammed my TiVo like that.
But if I just randomly had a bunch of embarrassing shows in addition to my selections? Awkward and funny.