turtleantGunpla Dadis the best.Registered Userregular
VRISKA: Do any other rides sound fun to you?
MEENAH: no
VRISKA: No?!
MEENAH: come on v serk
MEENAH: you dont go to amusment parks to hit up a bunch of rides for wigglers
VRISKA: Oh, sorry, Your Royal Highness. I forgot a8out the standards I was dealing with here.
VRISKA: Then what do you do?
MEENAH: you just shit around acting cool
MEENAH: not giving a fuck
MEENAH: being an all around punk and hasslin people who glance at you crooked
MAXIMUM TEENAGER!
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turtleantGunpla Dadis the best.Registered Userregular
Also Meenah's hairstyle is cool and all but the ends of her ponytails would be hella disgusting by the end of the day.
Don't drag your hair around on the ground behind you kids, it's unhygienic.
2009: 18 pages. Dream Jade picks up the BLUE PACKAGE, which contains her birthday present from John. By which I mean the Dreambot does as well. The note on the top reads "TO: GG FROM: GT". She cannot open it right now, since "it has an important journey to make first", but it's okay because she knows what's inside. We are then taken to John's house, but during the previous December. The yard is blanketed in snow. We see that, for some reason, there are clown and jester drawings all over John's calendar and MAC AND ME poster. The calendar does indicate, though, the other kids' birthdays via their colors: Jade on the 1st, Dave on the 3rd, and Rose on the 4th. John pesters Jade, his account name back then apparently being "ghostyTrickster". John says that he's been busy shopping for all of them, but that he thinks he's got all the packages sent on time. Jade remarks that it might take awhile to get "here", as John remembers too late it takes her forever to get things. Jade says it's okay though because it "will get to me exactly when it needs to", and then she doesn't respond for a few moments. After gets back, she tells John that she "had to tell someone to go away!" John asks if it's "the trolls again?", which she confirms. He says they've been "such a pain in the ass lately" and that there must be "like fifty of those retards or it's one guy with a lot of alt accounts". Jade says she doesn't know anything about them or their motives, which she finds "kind of weird" but she says that they are "probably all different people" and that she has counted twelve so far. She says they've been hassling her for years, and that on occasion they still manage to get through her blocks, but despite that "some of them are kind of funny". John disagrees though, and says he'll change his pesterchum handle to "throw them off the trail". Back in the present, we see that the rest of John's posters are similarly defaced. However, John blames it on the "recent handiwork of some mischievous imps". Meanwhile, Rose is back in her bedroom and reconnected. She has apparently named the mutant kitten VODKA MUTINI (or "Mutie for short"). Rose messages John and notes his newfound collection of totems, updates him on the status of her house (it's on fire), and asks if he's seen Dave. John says he hasn't because "bro is probably kicking his ass". Rose says they need to focus less on "frivolous knickknack" and more on getting him up to his gate, but John says that he's been "killing imps all over the house" and so they have plenty of grist. He also says that "serves them right for ruining my posters". Rose finds that hard to believe, because his "posters have looked like that ever since I first saw your room". John does not take this news well. "VERY FUNNY ROSE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" "TOP OF THE LINE PRANK" "HA HA HA HA". Meanwhile, in the future, WV and Serenity look up at the FROG TEMPLE. He is currently stuck on top of his station as, as he does not have enough cable left over to rappel down and is unwilling to sacrifice his MAYORAL SASH. We ask him to appearify the temple, but he refuses because it is way too big. Instead, they notice a cable dangling from one of the nearby towers. Serenity cannot carry the cable, as it is too heavy and attached to "an old rusty HARPOON". She finds this all very convenient. We ask WV to "get ye rope" and he uses the appearifier to... appearify the BLUE PACKAGE? Apparently the machine was set to appearify something from that location, but 413 years in the past. Attached to the top in green ink and girly lettering is a note that says "to Mister Mayor!" along with a drawing of WV and a heart. WV opens it, and there is another envelope inside and a letter. He is not sure what is going on, but it is "obviously critical MAYORAL BUSINESS".
2010: 6 pages. The first command for this update is "Thief: Tear into Page" and, well, that's a pretty accurate description. Vriska says that Tavros's pathetic conversation with Jade actually made her feel genuine embarrassment and goes from there. She then says that both him and Jade are "useless", which also must be the reason why he decided he likes her. He goes on a bit more about his "NEW SELF ESTEEMED OBTAINED", which gives Vriska a chance to say that Jade was right about one thing. She points out that if Tavros had just done "the one little thing I asked you to!" instead of flying away and sleeping for the rest of their adventure, he could've gotten some real self confidence, while is his still as fake as Rufio. Tavros says that "tHIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME PRETTY MAD" and is tired of taking her crap and about "MY FRIEND JADE, tOO". Vriska finds this laughable, as not only is Jade a "useless, 8oring no8ody" who has done nothing "other than fuck up every step of the way", sort of like him, except that oh, yeah, Jade hates him. She says that she's not "compleeeeeeeetely useless" though. Vriska "credits" Tavros for his plan as a way to test his powers across sessions, except that she already though of it and has had "lots and LOTS of practice" with his "little guinea pig friend", so maybe "so wasn't so useless at all!" She even concedes that controlling Becsprite would've maybe been a fine idea, except that it won't happen, as she "already thought of that". The next panel shows CD? gesturing wildly at one of the walls in Jack's office, show DD? Dave's room. Vriska says that Becsprite will not "attack the agents who engineered him in the first place". The screen then shows the "MEOW" book along with the other items stolen from Dave's room. Vriska points out that manipulating the agents is relatively easy, and that she just had to point them in the right direction. The panel shows DD? climbing in through the window of Dave's room. "I am the unseen hand 8ehind every major event in their session, and to some extent, their whole lives." "Don't you think this is how it should 8e? Shouldn't the greatest player leave her fingerprints on every step of the rise to power of her ultim8 nemesis?" Tavros gets something right, for once: "i DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SAY ALL THE WAYS i THINK THAT IS CRAZY". DD? prepares to kill the Dave that went back in time to stop him. Vriska accuses Tavros of "copycatting" her idea by trying to insert himself in to Jade's past. He claims it was for a good thing, she says "whatever". Anyway, the point is that "the human session is on full Serket lockdown. Any effort you make to disrupt my plans will 8e laugha8le, just like everything you have ever done in your life. The only thing left to do now is prepare to kill Jack myself, and save everyone's ungrateful asses."
2011: 16 pages. Jade and John wonder what just happened, as from their perspective everything just got "darker, and greener". Jade then does the math and realizes just how long it will take them to get to the new session. John figures it should be "like a few more minutes". She says "in about three years". John is dismayed and wants to know why she just can't "teleport us there?" She says that it's due to the way the Green Sun works: she can teleport within any particular instance of any particular universe, but not outside it. She can also act as a gateway of items to the Green Sun, but since the Sun exists outside of any particular universe in the Furthest Ring she just can't teleport there, instead just settling for being able to move at the speed of light. John realizes that this means the Green Sun was pretty important, and maybe that "trying to blow it up wasn't such a great idea". She agrees, but "to be fair, we were all the victims of a big prank!" Jade says that it's okay, though, because since the Sun is so important for all universes, Dave and Rose's mission was in a way an "unintended success", since they delivered the bomb that created the Sun "in the first place". John is nonplussed, but as Jade said, "we got played like a bunch of suckers!!!" John isn't coping well, as the Green Sun, the Tumor, Dave, Rose, Karkat, and Vriska swirl about his head in a "three years mind fuck". Elsewhere, one of Bilious Slick's hands floats in the the ether. It just the background of the platform where the Trolls were to claim the Ultimate Reward. PM, WV, Serenity, and Jack are right where we left them at the end of [ S] Cascade. Serenity blinks out "YOU SUCK!!!" to Jack. The energies of the Green Sun crackle between them. As the Trolls' meteor zooms way in the background, a blinking red "<3" appears next to Jack, while a blinking black "<3<" appears next to PM.
2012: 2 pages. The Serious Business continues, with the other Desrites then deciding that maybe a "rumpled head object may have intrinsic value". Jane's Dad says that he "CANNOT CONDONE THIS ACTIVITY", and then DD (posting as "The Dignitary") orders the hat burned. It is done. Just then, we see a pink clamshell phone next to a can of Tab. ")(IC" says she can't believe she funded this network as a "public works project" and that this is what she gets "for lettin proper dudes run shit instead of nasty clowns". DD doffs his hat. She says, "i want ma ring back motha fuck".
2013: No update.
December 13
2009: No update.
2010: 14 pages. Tavros opens a nearby chest, and says that based on all that Vriska is "THE BAD GUY TOO, iNSTEAD OF A GOOD GUY WHO'S JUST MEAN". Vriska congratulates him on the deduction, except that it's "wrong, excruci8tingly linear, and laced with the sort of a8solutes morons like to throw around........" Tavros gets around to saying that "i THINK, i AM GOING TO HAVE TO STOP YOU". Vriska says "that's the spirit" and that if he can find her, he gets "a free shot" at her. He says "oK, tHEN, hERE i COME," "I'll 8e w8ing " He then, of course, falls down the stairs with a good old "HAPPEN". Back in Vriska's room, we see she's looking at Jade on the viewport again. We then see that Jade is in the lab at her house, with a stuffed dog on the left, a stuffed dead dream self on the right, and a stolen fourth wall in the middle, presently showing a mind controlled Hussie with a single fake horn. We command him to "Ride". He does indeed, with his mount being some sort of flying goat creature with "wtf?" changing billiard ball eyes. Hussie asks it to vomit all over some bullies, and it does. "Let's move on." As THE WINDY THING subsides, John levels up and ascends all the way to the top rung on his echeladder: HEIR TRANSPARENT. The skies above him cloud back up, though, and the fireflies remain trapped. "The spell remains unbroken."
2011: 5 pages. Jack absconds. Serenity fires back "COWARD!" and PM puts her sword away (which is to say, right back into her chest).
2012: 5 pages. "Years in the future..." "minus several" it is raining at Roxy's house, though her window is currently set to display a nice partly cloudy day. We ask to examine her "wizardfic journal". The title page reads "Wizardy Herbert".
2009: 7 pages, 1 breakout page. WV adjusts the time settings on his APPEARIFIER and managed to appearify the JUMBLE OF CABLE this time. Taking the obvious course of action, WV lowers the PUMPKIN BINDLE first, and then lowers himself down along with the BLUE PACKAGE. Meanwhile, someone takes aim at WV. However, it is later shown as just the scope, being held by what looks to be a former Dersite covered in yellow caution tape, surveying the area from the upper entrance of the FROG TEMPLE. He then sees another bright spot in the sky, this time, it is PM's apple capsule making its way over. The AIMLESS RENEGADE has company.
2010: No update.
2011: 4 pages. PM turns her attention back toward WV and Serenity, who blinks "PLEASE... HELP HIM!!!"
2012: 6 pages. "being impaired is not actually constructive to the process of engineering awful prose" Roxy's wizardfic is apparently set in the framework of a story-within-a-story format, where at least the two main characters (Herbert and Beatrix) seem to know what is "supposed" to happen. The random page we see first has the two debate changing the story, as Herbert decides to shoot his way through. Interestingly, some of the text is written mostly correct (she doesn't capitalize anything) without any of Roxy's characteristic drunk spelling quirks, represented using the Courier font. Interspersed are parts in Comic Sans with a noticeable drop in coherence and spelling. Skipping further ahead, the characters are about in engage in an athletic contest of some sort, with appropriately meta references. The next bit we skip to has the two of them land awkardly on top of each other in the processing of doing sports, in an obvious kludge to build romantic tension. The characters realize this, but it cuts off because, well, "DOINT WRITE WHILT DRONK U LUSHY DUMBO". Roxy decides to take her own advice. She then gets a message from Calliope. The window above her shuts off, for no apparent reason (since everything in her house is powered by the green hubs). The only thing still with power is her laptop. Even odder is that the only thing Calliope says is ".......................". Roxy then realizes that she knows Calliope's name for some reason, and that she isn't actually drunk right now.
2013: No update.
December 15
2009: No update.
2010: 2 pages, 1 flash: [ S] John: Enter village. For the flash, see here. Afterward, John walks up to the top of the stone column. On it is a stone bed, with the Hero of Breath symbol on it. There are four tall bedposts, each with a dark globe on the top.
2011: 10 pages. The surviving members of the Trolls' lab (Gamzee, Karkat, Terezi, Kanaya) have made their way to the Green Sun, except for this half of Sollux who was killed by the psychic exertion needed to move the rock. Karkat has trouble keeping it together after seeing another one of his best friends die, but Gamzee points out that they have company. Indeed, it another Sollux, along with god tier garbed Aradia, Dave, and Rose. Then the image shifts, as though it is being viewed through someone with Green Sun powers, like Becsprite, Jack, or say, Jade. John, for lack of a better description, is blown away. They get back to gabbing quickly enough, though, as John says Dave's headgear makes him "look kind of a doofus" but Jade of course thinks it looks cool ("hes like a super hero now"). John also takes stock of the trolls, guessing correctly who Karkat, Gamzee, and Terezi are. He wonders if Vriska is there, and Jade just says "...", but he's happy Rose "looks better" because last time he saw her "she looked really girm. and also, dark." And then later on, dead. He asks Jade if it was weird when she had to corpsesmooch Dave, but she's mostly just surprised he knew about that (apparently Karkat likes to gossip). John wonders if all the corpsesmooching means that "karkat's silly shipping prophecy will come true". Jade asks if he wants to. He's not sure, and she just "hmmmmmm"s. John wishes he could talk to them. Jade says, well, she can help with that.
2012: 15 pages. Roxy gets up to look through the window, even though you're not supposed to be able to see anything when they're off. On the other side, a flashing, multi-colored crack spreads through the void. A small light blinks in the distance. Roxy thinks it's "TWINKLY HERBERT" ("haha what a pal, all comin to see me from infinite nowhere"). The firefly starts blinking in Morse code. Roxy has no idea why she can suddenly understand it, but rolls with it anyway. Herbert is apparently acting as a proxy for Callipe, and says: "SHHHHH" "THANK YOU" "THE SHORT ANSWER IS, YOU ARE HAVING A DREAM" "THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO TALK SOON, BUT LET'S PLEASE KEEP A LOW PROFILE FOR NOW". Roxy asks why. "SO MY BROTHER DOESN'T HEAR US" "(oh noes you mean hes here?) (already??)" "YES" "HE IS PASSING NEARBY WHILE DOING DAMAGE TO THE FURTHEST RING" "HE IS FOLLOWING A LARGE PARTY OF GHOSTS, IN HOPES THEY WILL LEAD HIM TO ME" "HIS INTENT IS TO DESTROY MY SOUL UTU". Roxy swears she won't let that happen. "YOU ARE VERY SWEET. I MISSED YOU, ROXY." "BUT THERE IS NOT MUCH YOU CAN DO AT THE MOMENT, OTHER THAN REMAIN DISCREET." "LET'S CONTINUE THIS ELSEWHERE. FOLLOW ME!" Roxy walks out the door of her bedroom. Roxy asks what's going on. "NO" [I don't]. "BUT LET'S KEEP GOING." Roxy asks what's up with her outfit. "IT APPEARS TO BE THE OUTFIT OF A FASHIONABLE SCIENCE WOMAN." She is then distracted by the wizard painting on the wall of what is almost certainly Rose's house.
2013: No update.
December 16
2009: 4 pages. "STRIIIIIIDEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!!" John asks Rose to keep an eye for any imps trashing more of his stuff, but she tells him again that they were always like that. He still doesn't believe her, even after she sendsscreenshots of his room. He asks why she didn't tell him about the, but she points out that she had "no reason to think [he] wasn't aware of them". John struggles with why he would deface them, not be able to see it, and then suddenly be able to. Rose points out that he went into his Dad's room, and John realizes what is going on: "you are going to psych-therapify me". Rose points that she is "just being a friend". John points out there wasn't anything in there and that it was kind of boring. John admits that he as "disappointed almost" that it wasn't as weird as he was expecting. Rose asks if it changed how he perceived his Dad, and he says "yeah, i guess". She says maybe it changed his "perception of things as well". John sees where this is going, and insists he isn't "crazy". Rose says she doesn't "like to use the word 'crazy'", which John says only proves his point. She gets to her point: that his "tendency for scrawling this imagery" is his "subconscious trying to express something disturbing", possibly from his past. They have been invisible because he has now "seen evidence that conflicts with" his worldview that his Dad is some sort of "clown-loving maniac". John thinks that "this is absurd" because of all the paintings "EVERYWHERE" else in the house, but Rose flips the whole thing on its head: maybe his Dad believed that John was into clowns because of the "strange drawings" in his room, and that his Dad liked his son's presumed "hobby" in order to "establish a stronger bond". (Well, that or wage "a campaign of passive-aggressive mockery", after all, she doesn't know his Dad that well.) John says to pause for a second and acknowledge "the bunny sassacre fedora" he just made. They agree it is awesome. We zoom out and see that Rose has constructed some more chimneys for support, but they're "kind of starting to wobble a little". She decides to build "more load-bearing walls", especially since "grist has been easier to come by lately". (And speaking of which, a new wave of ogres and imps is nearly up to John's house.) John also notes that Rose "really must be running low on time by now".
2010: 6 pages. John tells Vriska that he thinks he's ready to "take this legendary nap!" and get to work on those god tiers. John notes, though, that he doesn't think he can fall asleep on account of being excited and also that the Quest Bed is "more like a really hard slab of rock". Vriska asks, "John. Would you like me to put you to sleep?" He asks why she's asking instead of just doing it like she had all those other times. She tells him that "at some point a hero has to start making choices" because "that's what this game is all a8out", as they "affect the destiny of the universe you cre8te, as well as the type of hero you 8ecome". (She laments that she wishes "someone was around to explain all this to me" as she had to "do this a much less pleasant way".) So she asks "what'll it 8e". John reasons that if he has to "go to sleep to realize my destiny... and you have the ability to make me do that, so... it sounds like it is just the practical thing to do". She asks him to confirm. "yes, that is my decision. vriska, please put me to sleep!" "You got it. " John passes out on the bed. Jack flies in, draws his sword, and stabs him right through the chest. The sword then is teleported away. "8888)"
2011: 2 pages. Jade says that John could just "hop right through her" to the meteor with the trolls, Rose, and Dave. John asks "why don't we just do that then" but Jade reminds him that she's just a gateway and that she "cant travel to the sun" herself. John says it would suck for her to be alone for three years, but Jade gets the planets back out of her sylladex and reminds him that there's plenty of company. John does remind her that they only just met "for the first time ever a few minutes ago" so it would be kind of lame to just leave for another three years. That decided, Jade points out this could be fun, after all, "theres no pressure to do anything important or run around like lunatics anymore". After remembering that they can alchemize all the food they could ever want, John wonders if Rose knows he's okay, since last she saw he got stabbed in the back by Jack. Jade says that as a "fully realized seer of light" Rose probably "knows a ton of things now". John says he'll just "hop over real fast" and mock Karkat and Dave real quick before coming back, but Jade is pretty sure that her ability is not a two-way street. John laments the various "rules" that are apparently in place despite her omnipotence, but she says they're probably there "for a good reason", after all, real omnipotence is "especially dangerous in the wrong hands / like what happened with jack!" John says that means they're more like "semipotent" then. "semipotent demigods" "demidogs" "woof woof woof!" Apparently Jade has not "gotten the hang of the woofs yet", so John asks if the dog ears are a "permanent thing now". She thinks so. John points out that "you are like a furry now, but not really the weird kind that people on the internet like to have sex with in their imagination." Jade's only reaction to that is "D:"
2012: 9 pages. "DAT WIZARD" We get a closer look, and as Roxy points out, it's not actually a painting, it's just a wallpaper someone got off the Internet and blew up to ridiculous proportions. Calliope: "YES, BUT WE HAVE TO GO". Roxy eventually complies. They run into another one. Roxy says she won't get distracted and then she does anyway. Calliope tells her to hurry up, but then Roxy realizes someone else is there. There's a flash of lightning, but this time it's Her Imperious Condescencion. "THIS WAY!" Roxy dashes across and asks if the Batterwitch is really in "her house". "REMEMBER, YOU'RE ONLY DREAMING" "ALL THAT YOU SEE IS COMING FROM YOUR MEMORIES AND SUBCONSCIOUS" Roxy wonders if her dream house has any dream booze, but then scolds herself for falling off "THE DREAM WAGON". "SHHHHH!" They reach a door. "THROUGH HERE" "WE WILL HAVE MORE PRIVACY HERE" "you mean in the observatory?" "NOT EXACTLY" The other side is a pleasantly drawn rendering of the Sburb logo. Roxy walks through the door. A ways from the door, there a white, spiraling line.
12/16/2010 Page 4987
[ S] JOHN. RISE UP.
Audio: "Savior of the Waking World" by Toby Radiation Fox. "Doctor" by George Buzinkai.
The flash begins with the blood draining out of John's wound, as he lays on his quest bed. WV looks on, distressed. The fireflies gather around John's corpse and the Breeze blows gently. Suddenly, the four globes at the top of his quest bed begin to light up. The Hero of Breath symbol appears above the bed as more fireflies gather. WV can barely stand the suspense. On the Battlefield, the same wound appears on Dream John's body and begins to bleed out. There also, the breeze appears and he lays on a bed much like the one on LOWAS. WV? looks on amazement. There is a blinding flash of light as Dream John's body rises into the air. We zoom in on his right hand, the blood that had drained down to it disappears, along with his sleeve. The event is apparently so spectacular that Jade, Dave, and Rose can see it from their own planets.
A blue shirt, dark blue long windsock hoodie, and a Hero of Breath symbol emblazoned on his chest...
The HEIR OF BREATH has ascended.
John looks into the clouds, and sees his own dead body back on LOWAS.
On his terminal, WV can only see John's corpse. Before it permanently goes dark, he sees Jack one last time.
Postscript:
> 4/13/2009 - 12/16/2010
> DAY 612
> _
2011: 10 pages. John asks if he can at least send a note through, and she says "sure!" but it has to be soon. John tries to figure something out, thinking "maybe the back of a movie poster" but for some reason still thinks "most of them were ruined by imps". Jade busts out an ARMAGEDDON poster, must to John's approval. John figures he needs something to put it in, but does't want to sacrifice one of his books, so Jade suggests a bucket. That settled, Jade gets some of their future companions abroad the ship, including plenty of escorts (who all seem to have a thing for their respective hero's bedsheets), Carapacians, Bubbles Viceroy von Salamander/Casey, and last but not least, Davesprite. (John for some reason says his name as "dave sprite".) John writes the letter while Davesprite tries to mess with him and Jade tries to get them to hurry up. Just as John lobs the bucket through, he remembers "trolls hate cleaning products for some alien reason!" Davesprite chimes in that "you fucked up" right when we see Karkat's face trough the portal (which is to say, Jade). Meanwhile, our two other godtier kids level. Rose from PENTACLE THERAPIST to ARIADNE'S THREADSPINNER (with the next tier being SURYA'S LURID GLARE). Dave ascends from HOTPOATO BUTTERFIGNERS to REVENGE OF RICKY SCHRODINGER (with his next tier being PIMPSLAYER). They both also gain the GIFT OF GAB.
2012: 7 pages. Roxy descends the path. The logo disappears. As she gets close to the bottom, an empty-eyed green skull monster with lime green swirls appears behind her. When Roxy turns around, though, Calliope changes into her trollsona.
12/18/2009 Page 2926
[ S] Jade: Dream up extra arms and play advanced bass solo.
Original audio: "Guardian V2" by Bill Bolin
Audio: "The Beginning of Something Really Excellent" by Robert J! Lake
This is where we first learn about the extent of what happens when Jade goes to sleep. We start with DREAM JADE suddenly sporting a couple more arms and playing her now very ECLETIC BASS. We zoom out to an external view of her bedroom, and then back in, where real Jade is asleep on her bed and JADE'S DREAMBOT is the playing the bass. We cut to a split screen image showing these things are happening at the same time, and then back to Dream Jade. Much like in [ S] Jade: Play a hauntingly relaxing bassline, the playing the bass excites the fruits and vegetables in Jade's garden, except the effect is several times stronger. We zoom back to Dream Jade, and then zoom out, revealing a tower much like Jade's house, except instead her bedroom being the satellite, it is the at the top of the main tower. The tower is golden. As we zoom out, we see a golden city. Further out, we see the city is a small round body with another golden tower. We then see this body is a MOON attached via a chain to a much larger golden body with FOUR GOLDEN TOWERS with orbs at the top, like the cityscape we saw in [ S] WV: Ascend. The caption tells us this is PROPSIT. We gradually zoom out further, and see that Propsit and its moon orbit a large, blue body: SKAIA.
Afterward, we ask Jade to change her wardrobifier settings again, and she does, but leaves the MOON on there 'cause she likes it. We ask her to "go explore the golden city" and so she flies right out of her tower. The city is massive, labyrinth, and, well, golden. We are again shown the Dreambot, using its rocket to hover in the corresponding places on Jade's island.
2010: 2 pages. Over on LOHAC, a Dave wearing the FELT DUDS rests on his quest bed. Standing behind him is Dave, readying Caledscratch.
2011: 1 page. Sollux is confronted with, well, his own dead body, which he finds a tad morbid but Aradia reminds him that she wanted to have a "corpse party!" No one seems to get what she means, so she asks Rose to explain "what a human funeral is like" but Rose's view is colored by the fact the only funeral she's ever been to was the one for her dead cat. Dave figures she's fucking with them, and Aradia says that may've been "just a tad specific". Sollux is still unenthusiastic. While he thinks it's "c0ol t0 see you s0 excited about s0mething" he reminder her that "not everyb0dy is as into death as y0u". Aradia asks if she's really that bad, and Terezi says "Y3S" but that her "WHOL3 D34TH F4NG1RL TH1NG 1S FUNNY 4ND K1ND OF CH4RM1NG" and that fortunately she makes "4N 4DOR4BL3 H4NDM41D TO TH3 M4ST3R OF D34TH". Terezi takes this chance to remind everyone that, after all, in Troll culture death is personified by a dude with "4 FR1GHT3N1NG SKULL FOR 4 H34D 4ND 4 T3RR1BL3 HYPONT1C GL4R3" and that he has a "SUP3R FOXY H4NDM41D TO DO H1S D1RTYWORK". Terezi says that's "4LL F4NST4SY OF COURS3", but that such explanations are necessary for understanding each other. Dave, of course, point out that humanity has "a grim reaper too" and that just about any civilization is going to "make up a myth figure for death". Terezi says between death myths and cotton candy they might "4S W3LL B3 TH3 S4M3 D4MN SP3C13S" a which point Karkat finally can't take this anymore: "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK."
2012: 2 pages. Roxy is pleased as a peach to finally meet Calliope, though she does note that she looks remarkably like a troll. Calliope says that she actually doesn't, but that her "trUe visage woUld likely repUlse or frighten yoU". Roxy insists that it wouldn't, so then Calliope says it's for her own sake as well: "i am mUch more comfortable appearing to yoU this way". She explains that they probably don't have a lot of time in this dreambubble that she specially created for their meetup. She says that as long as they stand at the center of the vortex, Caliborn cannot hear her (as he is otherwise apparently "highly sensitive" to her presence. Plus, Roxy being a Hero of Void adds an additional layer of security. Roxy tells Calliope that she's missed out on some "truly SELECT teen drama" but says that otherwise getting to hang out with her friends was pretty great ("it started feelin weird to think we were ever even apart"). Roxy then asks her why Caliborn is trying to kill her so badly. She says he already did. The background changes to the vast cosmos, with the red sun of the cherbus' homeworld behind them. Calliope says that deep down she done for when Caliborn figured out how to kill her dreamself, but doubts she would've fared much better anyway. She says that her strategy was, through relentless optimism and compassion breakthrough her brother's worst qualities and win, in a manner of speaking, by making him more like her. "we both woUld have won. my predomination woUld not have meant his absolUte death, but oUr trUe Union." But despite his victory, he will not feel he has truly won until he has wiped out all traces of her soul. Roxy says she wants to kill him, and then realizes that her and her companions may be the ones to do it. Calliope notes that "he deserves a comeUppance like few others" but that ultimately it is probably her responsibility. She tells Roxy about some of the plans that "hUndreds" of others are working on out in the Furthest Ring. Roxy asks that if she's ultimately the weapon needed to defeat him, then why not go and do it? Calliope points out that she stood no chance against him "when he was jUst a brat who liked to tease me", much less now that he's an "exceptionally mUscUlar and invincible adUlt". She says she needs all the time she can get when to find her own weapon: herself. More accurately, another iteration of herself from a doomed timeline where she came to dominate.
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"mangaka dudebro, lord of the shitwanks "
is officially the funniest title I've heard in a long while.
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Gettin' sweet tats together.
what do we think the gap will be between vriska's tattoo appearing in the comic and it being inside someone's actual skin
I think
two months
I also for some reason thought this took place in the meteor, not on Alternia.
3DS: 0232-8293-7683
it's goddamn adorable
Hussie
steam | Dokkan: 868846562
MAXIMUM TEENAGER!
Don't drag your hair around on the ground behind you kids, it's unhygienic.
Part 3
December 12
2009: 18 pages. Dream Jade picks up the BLUE PACKAGE, which contains her birthday present from John. By which I mean the Dreambot does as well. The note on the top reads "TO: GG FROM: GT". She cannot open it right now, since "it has an important journey to make first", but it's okay because she knows what's inside. We are then taken to John's house, but during the previous December. The yard is blanketed in snow. We see that, for some reason, there are clown and jester drawings all over John's calendar and MAC AND ME poster. The calendar does indicate, though, the other kids' birthdays via their colors: Jade on the 1st, Dave on the 3rd, and Rose on the 4th. John pesters Jade, his account name back then apparently being "ghostyTrickster". John says that he's been busy shopping for all of them, but that he thinks he's got all the packages sent on time. Jade remarks that it might take awhile to get "here", as John remembers too late it takes her forever to get things. Jade says it's okay though because it "will get to me exactly when it needs to", and then she doesn't respond for a few moments. After gets back, she tells John that she "had to tell someone to go away!" John asks if it's "the trolls again?", which she confirms. He says they've been "such a pain in the ass lately" and that there must be "like fifty of those retards or it's one guy with a lot of alt accounts". Jade says she doesn't know anything about them or their motives, which she finds "kind of weird" but she says that they are "probably all different people" and that she has counted twelve so far. She says they've been hassling her for years, and that on occasion they still manage to get through her blocks, but despite that "some of them are kind of funny". John disagrees though, and says he'll change his pesterchum handle to "throw them off the trail". Back in the present, we see that the rest of John's posters are similarly defaced. However, John blames it on the "recent handiwork of some mischievous imps". Meanwhile, Rose is back in her bedroom and reconnected. She has apparently named the mutant kitten VODKA MUTINI (or "Mutie for short"). Rose messages John and notes his newfound collection of totems, updates him on the status of her house (it's on fire), and asks if he's seen Dave. John says he hasn't because "bro is probably kicking his ass". Rose says they need to focus less on "frivolous knickknack" and more on getting him up to his gate, but John says that he's been "killing imps all over the house" and so they have plenty of grist. He also says that "serves them right for ruining my posters". Rose finds that hard to believe, because his "posters have looked like that ever since I first saw your room". John does not take this news well. "VERY FUNNY ROSE HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" "TOP OF THE LINE PRANK" "HA HA HA HA". Meanwhile, in the future, WV and Serenity look up at the FROG TEMPLE. He is currently stuck on top of his station as, as he does not have enough cable left over to rappel down and is unwilling to sacrifice his MAYORAL SASH. We ask him to appearify the temple, but he refuses because it is way too big. Instead, they notice a cable dangling from one of the nearby towers. Serenity cannot carry the cable, as it is too heavy and attached to "an old rusty HARPOON". She finds this all very convenient. We ask WV to "get ye rope" and he uses the appearifier to... appearify the BLUE PACKAGE? Apparently the machine was set to appearify something from that location, but 413 years in the past. Attached to the top in green ink and girly lettering is a note that says "to Mister Mayor!" along with a drawing of WV and a heart. WV opens it, and there is another envelope inside and a letter. He is not sure what is going on, but it is "obviously critical MAYORAL BUSINESS".
2010: 6 pages. The first command for this update is "Thief: Tear into Page" and, well, that's a pretty accurate description. Vriska says that Tavros's pathetic conversation with Jade actually made her feel genuine embarrassment and goes from there. She then says that both him and Jade are "useless", which also must be the reason why he decided he likes her. He goes on a bit more about his "NEW SELF ESTEEMED OBTAINED", which gives Vriska a chance to say that Jade was right about one thing. She points out that if Tavros had just done "the one little thing I asked you to!" instead of flying away and sleeping for the rest of their adventure, he could've gotten some real self confidence, while is his still as fake as Rufio. Tavros says that "tHIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME PRETTY MAD" and is tired of taking her crap and about "MY FRIEND JADE, tOO". Vriska finds this laughable, as not only is Jade a "useless, 8oring no8ody" who has done nothing "other than fuck up every step of the way", sort of like him, except that oh, yeah, Jade hates him. She says that she's not "compleeeeeeeetely useless" though. Vriska "credits" Tavros for his plan as a way to test his powers across sessions, except that she already though of it and has had "lots and LOTS of practice" with his "little guinea pig friend", so maybe "so wasn't so useless at all!" She even concedes that controlling Becsprite would've maybe been a fine idea, except that it won't happen, as she "already thought of that". The next panel shows CD? gesturing wildly at one of the walls in Jack's office, show DD? Dave's room. Vriska says that Becsprite will not "attack the agents who engineered him in the first place". The screen then shows the "MEOW" book along with the other items stolen from Dave's room. Vriska points out that manipulating the agents is relatively easy, and that she just had to point them in the right direction. The panel shows DD? climbing in through the window of Dave's room. "I am the unseen hand 8ehind every major event in their session, and to some extent, their whole lives." "Don't you think this is how it should 8e? Shouldn't the greatest player leave her fingerprints on every step of the rise to power of her ultim8 nemesis?" Tavros gets something right, for once: "i DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SAY ALL THE WAYS i THINK THAT IS CRAZY". DD? prepares to kill the Dave that went back in time to stop him. Vriska accuses Tavros of "copycatting" her idea by trying to insert himself in to Jade's past. He claims it was for a good thing, she says "whatever". Anyway, the point is that "the human session is on full Serket lockdown. Any effort you make to disrupt my plans will 8e laugha8le, just like everything you have ever done in your life. The only thing left to do now is prepare to kill Jack myself, and save everyone's ungrateful asses."
2011: 16 pages. Jade and John wonder what just happened, as from their perspective everything just got "darker, and greener". Jade then does the math and realizes just how long it will take them to get to the new session. John figures it should be "like a few more minutes". She says "in about three years". John is dismayed and wants to know why she just can't "teleport us there?" She says that it's due to the way the Green Sun works: she can teleport within any particular instance of any particular universe, but not outside it. She can also act as a gateway of items to the Green Sun, but since the Sun exists outside of any particular universe in the Furthest Ring she just can't teleport there, instead just settling for being able to move at the speed of light. John realizes that this means the Green Sun was pretty important, and maybe that "trying to blow it up wasn't such a great idea". She agrees, but "to be fair, we were all the victims of a big prank!" Jade says that it's okay, though, because since the Sun is so important for all universes, Dave and Rose's mission was in a way an "unintended success", since they delivered the bomb that created the Sun "in the first place". John is nonplussed, but as Jade said, "we got played like a bunch of suckers!!!" John isn't coping well, as the Green Sun, the Tumor, Dave, Rose, Karkat, and Vriska swirl about his head in a "three years mind fuck". Elsewhere, one of Bilious Slick's hands floats in the the ether. It just the background of the platform where the Trolls were to claim the Ultimate Reward. PM, WV, Serenity, and Jack are right where we left them at the end of [ S] Cascade. Serenity blinks out "YOU SUCK!!!" to Jack. The energies of the Green Sun crackle between them. As the Trolls' meteor zooms way in the background, a blinking red "<3" appears next to Jack, while a blinking black "<3<" appears next to PM.
2012: 2 pages. The Serious Business continues, with the other Desrites then deciding that maybe a "rumpled head object may have intrinsic value". Jane's Dad says that he "CANNOT CONDONE THIS ACTIVITY", and then DD (posting as "The Dignitary") orders the hat burned. It is done. Just then, we see a pink clamshell phone next to a can of Tab. ")(IC" says she can't believe she funded this network as a "public works project" and that this is what she gets "for lettin proper dudes run shit instead of nasty clowns". DD doffs his hat. She says, "i want ma ring back motha fuck".
2013: No update.
2009: No update.
2010: 14 pages. Tavros opens a nearby chest, and says that based on all that Vriska is "THE BAD GUY TOO, iNSTEAD OF A GOOD GUY WHO'S JUST MEAN". Vriska congratulates him on the deduction, except that it's "wrong, excruci8tingly linear, and laced with the sort of a8solutes morons like to throw around........" Tavros gets around to saying that "i THINK, i AM GOING TO HAVE TO STOP YOU". Vriska says "that's the spirit" and that if he can find her, he gets "a free shot" at her. He says "oK, tHEN, hERE i COME," "I'll 8e w8ing
2011: 5 pages. Jack absconds. Serenity fires back "COWARD!" and PM puts her sword away (which is to say, right back into her chest).
2012: 5 pages. "Years in the future..." "minus several" it is raining at Roxy's house, though her window is currently set to display a nice partly cloudy day. We ask to examine her "wizardfic journal". The title page reads "Wizardy Herbert".
2013: No update.
dickbutt.jpg
I think I've captured homestuck/her character quite well
Do evil yet cool things that make me heavily like/dislike you already!
Switch Friend Code: SW-1406-1275-7906
3DS: 0232-8293-7683
"Cast in the Name of Gog, Ye Not Guilty"
In an almost unreadably fancy old gothic font.
Switch - SW-7373-3669-3011
Fuck Joe Manchin
It'll actually be the kanji for pilaf.
Hussie
Part 1
December 14
2009: 7 pages, 1 breakout page. WV adjusts the time settings on his APPEARIFIER and managed to appearify the JUMBLE OF CABLE this time. Taking the obvious course of action, WV lowers the PUMPKIN BINDLE first, and then lowers himself down along with the BLUE PACKAGE. Meanwhile, someone takes aim at WV. However, it is later shown as just the scope, being held by what looks to be a former Dersite covered in yellow caution tape, surveying the area from the upper entrance of the FROG TEMPLE. He then sees another bright spot in the sky, this time, it is PM's apple capsule making its way over. The AIMLESS RENEGADE has company.
2010: No update.
2011: 4 pages. PM turns her attention back toward WV and Serenity, who blinks "PLEASE... HELP HIM!!!"
2012: 6 pages. "being impaired is not actually constructive to the process of engineering awful prose" Roxy's wizardfic is apparently set in the framework of a story-within-a-story format, where at least the two main characters (Herbert and Beatrix) seem to know what is "supposed" to happen. The random page we see first has the two debate changing the story, as Herbert decides to shoot his way through. Interestingly, some of the text is written mostly correct (she doesn't capitalize anything) without any of Roxy's characteristic drunk spelling quirks, represented using the Courier font. Interspersed are parts in Comic Sans with a noticeable drop in coherence and spelling. Skipping further ahead, the characters are about in engage in an athletic contest of some sort, with appropriately meta references. The next bit we skip to has the two of them land awkardly on top of each other in the processing of doing sports, in an obvious kludge to build romantic tension. The characters realize this, but it cuts off because, well, "DOINT WRITE WHILT DRONK U LUSHY DUMBO". Roxy decides to take her own advice. She then gets a message from Calliope. The window above her shuts off, for no apparent reason (since everything in her house is powered by the green hubs). The only thing still with power is her laptop. Even odder is that the only thing Calliope says is ".......................". Roxy then realizes that she knows Calliope's name for some reason, and that she isn't actually drunk right now.
2013: No update.
2009: No update.
2010: 2 pages, 1 flash: [ S] John: Enter village. For the flash, see here. Afterward, John walks up to the top of the stone column. On it is a stone bed, with the Hero of Breath symbol on it. There are four tall bedposts, each with a dark globe on the top.
2011: 10 pages. The surviving members of the Trolls' lab (Gamzee, Karkat, Terezi, Kanaya) have made their way to the Green Sun, except for this half of Sollux who was killed by the psychic exertion needed to move the rock. Karkat has trouble keeping it together after seeing another one of his best friends die, but Gamzee points out that they have company. Indeed, it another Sollux, along with god tier garbed Aradia, Dave, and Rose. Then the image shifts, as though it is being viewed through someone with Green Sun powers, like Becsprite, Jack, or say, Jade. John, for lack of a better description, is blown away. They get back to gabbing quickly enough, though, as John says Dave's headgear makes him "look kind of a doofus" but Jade of course thinks it looks cool ("hes like a super hero now"). John also takes stock of the trolls, guessing correctly who Karkat, Gamzee, and Terezi are. He wonders if Vriska is there, and Jade just says "...", but he's happy Rose "looks better" because last time he saw her "she looked really girm. and also, dark." And then later on, dead. He asks Jade if it was weird when she had to corpsesmooch Dave, but she's mostly just surprised he knew about that (apparently Karkat likes to gossip). John wonders if all the corpsesmooching means that "karkat's silly shipping prophecy will come true". Jade asks if he wants to. He's not sure, and she just "hmmmmmm"s. John wishes he could talk to them. Jade says, well, she can help with that.
2012: 15 pages. Roxy gets up to look through the window, even though you're not supposed to be able to see anything when they're off. On the other side, a flashing, multi-colored crack spreads through the void. A small light blinks in the distance. Roxy thinks it's "TWINKLY HERBERT" ("haha what a pal, all comin to see me from infinite nowhere"). The firefly starts blinking in Morse code. Roxy has no idea why she can suddenly understand it, but rolls with it anyway. Herbert is apparently acting as a proxy for Callipe, and says: "SHHHHH" "THANK YOU" "THE SHORT ANSWER IS, YOU ARE HAVING A DREAM" "THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO TALK SOON, BUT LET'S PLEASE KEEP A LOW PROFILE FOR NOW". Roxy asks why. "SO MY BROTHER DOESN'T HEAR US" "(oh noes you mean hes here?) (already??)" "YES" "HE IS PASSING NEARBY WHILE DOING DAMAGE TO THE FURTHEST RING" "HE IS FOLLOWING A LARGE PARTY OF GHOSTS, IN HOPES THEY WILL LEAD HIM TO ME" "HIS INTENT IS TO DESTROY MY SOUL UTU". Roxy swears she won't let that happen. "YOU ARE VERY SWEET. I MISSED YOU, ROXY." "BUT THERE IS NOT MUCH YOU CAN DO AT THE MOMENT, OTHER THAN REMAIN DISCREET." "LET'S CONTINUE THIS ELSEWHERE. FOLLOW ME!" Roxy walks out the door of her bedroom. Roxy asks what's going on. "NO" [I don't]. "BUT LET'S KEEP GOING." Roxy asks what's up with her outfit. "IT APPEARS TO BE THE OUTFIT OF A FASHIONABLE SCIENCE WOMAN." She is then distracted by the wizard painting on the wall of what is almost certainly Rose's house.
2013: No update.
2009: 4 pages. "STRIIIIIIDEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!!" John asks Rose to keep an eye for any imps trashing more of his stuff, but she tells him again that they were always like that. He still doesn't believe her, even after she sends screenshots of his room. He asks why she didn't tell him about the, but she points out that she had "no reason to think [he] wasn't aware of them". John struggles with why he would deface them, not be able to see it, and then suddenly be able to. Rose points out that he went into his Dad's room, and John realizes what is going on: "you are going to psych-therapify me". Rose points that she is "just being a friend". John points out there wasn't anything in there and that it was kind of boring. John admits that he as "disappointed almost" that it wasn't as weird as he was expecting. Rose asks if it changed how he perceived his Dad, and he says "yeah, i guess". She says maybe it changed his "perception of things as well". John sees where this is going, and insists he isn't "crazy". Rose says she doesn't "like to use the word 'crazy'", which John says only proves his point. She gets to her point: that his "tendency for scrawling this imagery" is his "subconscious trying to express something disturbing", possibly from his past. They have been invisible because he has now "seen evidence that conflicts with" his worldview that his Dad is some sort of "clown-loving maniac". John thinks that "this is absurd" because of all the paintings "EVERYWHERE" else in the house, but Rose flips the whole thing on its head: maybe his Dad believed that John was into clowns because of the "strange drawings" in his room, and that his Dad liked his son's presumed "hobby" in order to "establish a stronger bond". (Well, that or wage "a campaign of passive-aggressive mockery", after all, she doesn't know his Dad that well.) John says to pause for a second and acknowledge "the bunny sassacre fedora" he just made. They agree it is awesome. We zoom out and see that Rose has constructed some more chimneys for support, but they're "kind of starting to wobble a little". She decides to build "more load-bearing walls", especially since "grist has been easier to come by lately". (And speaking of which, a new wave of ogres and imps is nearly up to John's house.) John also notes that Rose "really must be running low on time by now".
2010: 6 pages. John tells Vriska that he thinks he's ready to "take this legendary nap!" and get to work on those god tiers. John notes, though, that he doesn't think he can fall asleep on account of being excited and also that the Quest Bed is "more like a really hard slab of rock". Vriska asks, "John. Would you like me to put you to sleep?" He asks why she's asking instead of just doing it like she had all those other times. She tells him that "at some point a hero has to start making choices" because "that's what this game is all a8out", as they "affect the destiny of the universe you cre8te, as well as the type of hero you 8ecome". (She laments that she wishes "someone was around to explain all this to me" as she had to "do this a much less pleasant way".) So she asks "what'll it 8e". John reasons that if he has to "go to sleep to realize my destiny... and you have the ability to make me do that, so... it sounds like it is just the practical thing to do". She asks him to confirm. "yes, that is my decision. vriska, please put me to sleep!" "You got it.
2011: 2 pages. Jade says that John could just "hop right through her" to the meteor with the trolls, Rose, and Dave. John asks "why don't we just do that then" but Jade reminds him that she's just a gateway and that she "cant travel to the sun" herself. John says it would suck for her to be alone for three years, but Jade gets the planets back out of her sylladex and reminds him that there's plenty of company. John does remind her that they only just met "for the first time ever a few minutes ago" so it would be kind of lame to just leave for another three years. That decided, Jade points out this could be fun, after all, "theres no pressure to do anything important or run around like lunatics anymore". After remembering that they can alchemize all the food they could ever want, John wonders if Rose knows he's okay, since last she saw he got stabbed in the back by Jack. Jade says that as a "fully realized seer of light" Rose probably "knows a ton of things now". John says he'll just "hop over real fast" and mock Karkat and Dave real quick before coming back, but Jade is pretty sure that her ability is not a two-way street. John laments the various "rules" that are apparently in place despite her omnipotence, but she says they're probably there "for a good reason", after all, real omnipotence is "especially dangerous in the wrong hands / like what happened with jack!" John says that means they're more like "semipotent" then. "semipotent demigods" "demidogs" "woof woof woof!" Apparently Jade has not "gotten the hang of the woofs yet", so John asks if the dog ears are a "permanent thing now". She thinks so. John points out that "you are like a furry now, but not really the weird kind that people on the internet like to have sex with in their imagination." Jade's only reaction to that is "D:"
2012: 9 pages. "DAT WIZARD" We get a closer look, and as Roxy points out, it's not actually a painting, it's just a wallpaper someone got off the Internet and blew up to ridiculous proportions. Calliope: "YES, BUT WE HAVE TO GO". Roxy eventually complies. They run into another one. Roxy says she won't get distracted and then she does anyway. Calliope tells her to hurry up, but then Roxy realizes someone else is there. There's a flash of lightning, but this time it's Her Imperious Condescencion. "THIS WAY!" Roxy dashes across and asks if the Batterwitch is really in "her house". "REMEMBER, YOU'RE ONLY DREAMING" "ALL THAT YOU SEE IS COMING FROM YOUR MEMORIES AND SUBCONSCIOUS" Roxy wonders if her dream house has any dream booze, but then scolds herself for falling off "THE DREAM WAGON". "SHHHHH!" They reach a door. "THROUGH HERE" "WE WILL HAVE MORE PRIVACY HERE" "you mean in the observatory?" "NOT EXACTLY" The other side is a pleasantly drawn rendering of the Sburb logo. Roxy walks through the door. A ways from the door, there a white, spiraling line.
2013: No update.
2009: No update.
2010: 1 page, 1 flash: [ S] JOHN. RISE UP.
[ S] JOHN. RISE UP.
Audio: "Savior of the Waking World" by Toby Radiation Fox. "Doctor" by George Buzinkai.
The flash begins with the blood draining out of John's wound, as he lays on his quest bed. WV looks on, distressed. The fireflies gather around John's corpse and the Breeze blows gently. Suddenly, the four globes at the top of his quest bed begin to light up. The Hero of Breath symbol appears above the bed as more fireflies gather. WV can barely stand the suspense. On the Battlefield, the same wound appears on Dream John's body and begins to bleed out. There also, the breeze appears and he lays on a bed much like the one on LOWAS. WV? looks on amazement. There is a blinding flash of light as Dream John's body rises into the air. We zoom in on his right hand, the blood that had drained down to it disappears, along with his sleeve. The event is apparently so spectacular that Jade, Dave, and Rose can see it from their own planets.
A blue shirt, dark blue long windsock hoodie, and a Hero of Breath symbol emblazoned on his chest...
The HEIR OF BREATH has ascended.
John looks into the clouds, and sees his own dead body back on LOWAS.
On his terminal, WV can only see John's corpse. Before it permanently goes dark, he sees Jack one last time.
Postscript:
> 4/13/2009 - 12/16/2010
> DAY 612
> _
2011: 10 pages. John asks if he can at least send a note through, and she says "sure!" but it has to be soon. John tries to figure something out, thinking "maybe the back of a movie poster" but for some reason still thinks "most of them were ruined by imps". Jade busts out an ARMAGEDDON poster, must to John's approval. John figures he needs something to put it in, but does't want to sacrifice one of his books, so Jade suggests a bucket. That settled, Jade gets some of their future companions abroad the ship, including plenty of escorts (who all seem to have a thing for their respective hero's bedsheets), Carapacians, Bubbles Viceroy von Salamander/Casey, and last but not least, Davesprite. (John for some reason says his name as "dave sprite".) John writes the letter while Davesprite tries to mess with him and Jade tries to get them to hurry up. Just as John lobs the bucket through, he remembers "trolls hate cleaning products for some alien reason!" Davesprite chimes in that "you fucked up" right when we see Karkat's
2012: 7 pages. Roxy descends the path. The logo disappears. As she gets close to the bottom, an empty-eyed green skull monster with lime green swirls appears behind her. When Roxy turns around, though, Calliope changes into her trollsona.
2013: No update.
2009: 6 pages, 1 flash: [ S] Jade: Dream up extra arms and play advanced bass solo.
[ S] Jade: Dream up extra arms and play advanced bass solo.
Original audio: "Guardian V2" by Bill Bolin
Audio: "The Beginning of Something Really Excellent" by Robert J! Lake
This is where we first learn about the extent of what happens when Jade goes to sleep. We start with DREAM JADE suddenly sporting a couple more arms and playing her now very ECLETIC BASS. We zoom out to an external view of her bedroom, and then back in, where real Jade is asleep on her bed and JADE'S DREAMBOT is the playing the bass. We cut to a split screen image showing these things are happening at the same time, and then back to Dream Jade. Much like in [ S] Jade: Play a hauntingly relaxing bassline, the playing the bass excites the fruits and vegetables in Jade's garden, except the effect is several times stronger. We zoom back to Dream Jade, and then zoom out, revealing a tower much like Jade's house, except instead her bedroom being the satellite, it is the at the top of the main tower. The tower is golden. As we zoom out, we see a golden city. Further out, we see the city is a small round body with another golden tower. We then see this body is a MOON attached via a chain to a much larger golden body with FOUR GOLDEN TOWERS with orbs at the top, like the cityscape we saw in [ S] WV: Ascend. The caption tells us this is PROPSIT. We gradually zoom out further, and see that Propsit and its moon orbit a large, blue body: SKAIA.
2010: 2 pages. Over on LOHAC, a Dave wearing the FELT DUDS rests on his quest bed. Standing behind him is Dave, readying Caledscratch.
2011: 1 page. Sollux is confronted with, well, his own dead body, which he finds a tad morbid but Aradia reminds him that she wanted to have a "corpse party!" No one seems to get what she means, so she asks Rose to explain "what a human funeral is like" but Rose's view is colored by the fact the only funeral she's ever been to was the one for her dead cat. Dave figures she's fucking with them, and Aradia says that may've been "just a tad specific". Sollux is still unenthusiastic. While he thinks it's "c0ol t0 see you s0 excited about s0mething" he reminder her that "not everyb0dy is as into death as y0u". Aradia asks if she's really that bad, and Terezi says "Y3S" but that her "WHOL3 D34TH F4NG1RL TH1NG 1S FUNNY 4ND K1ND OF CH4RM1NG" and that fortunately she makes "4N 4DOR4BL3 H4NDM41D TO TH3 M4ST3R OF D34TH". Terezi takes this chance to remind everyone that, after all, in Troll culture death is personified by a dude with "4 FR1GHT3N1NG SKULL FOR 4 H34D 4ND 4 T3RR1BL3 HYPONT1C GL4R3" and that he has a "SUP3R FOXY H4NDM41D TO DO H1S D1RTYWORK". Terezi says that's "4LL F4NST4SY OF COURS3", but that such explanations are necessary for understanding each other. Dave, of course, point out that humanity has "a grim reaper too" and that just about any civilization is going to "make up a myth figure for death". Terezi says between death myths and cotton candy they might "4S W3LL B3 TH3 S4M3 D4MN SP3C13S" a which point Karkat finally can't take this anymore: "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK."
2012: 2 pages. Roxy is pleased as a peach to finally meet Calliope, though she does note that she looks remarkably like a troll. Calliope says that she actually doesn't, but that her "trUe visage woUld likely repUlse or frighten yoU". Roxy insists that it wouldn't, so then Calliope says it's for her own sake as well: "i am mUch more comfortable appearing to yoU this way". She explains that they probably don't have a lot of time in this dreambubble that she specially created for their meetup. She says that as long as they stand at the center of the vortex, Caliborn cannot hear her (as he is otherwise apparently "highly sensitive" to her presence. Plus, Roxy being a Hero of Void adds an additional layer of security. Roxy tells Calliope that she's missed out on some "truly SELECT teen drama" but says that otherwise getting to hang out with her friends was pretty great ("it started feelin weird to think we were ever even apart"). Roxy then asks her why Caliborn is trying to kill her so badly. She says he already did. The background changes to the vast cosmos, with the red sun of the cherbus' homeworld behind them. Calliope says that deep down she done for when Caliborn figured out how to kill her dreamself, but doubts she would've fared much better anyway. She says that her strategy was, through relentless optimism and compassion breakthrough her brother's worst qualities and win, in a manner of speaking, by making him more like her. "we both woUld have won. my predomination woUld not have meant his absolUte death, but oUr trUe Union." But despite his victory, he will not feel he has truly won until he has wiped out all traces of her soul. Roxy says she wants to kill him, and then realizes that her and her companions may be the ones to do it. Calliope notes that "he deserves a comeUppance like few others" but that ultimately it is probably her responsibility. She tells Roxy about some of the plans that "hUndreds" of others are working on out in the Furthest Ring. Roxy asks that if she's ultimately the weapon needed to defeat him, then why not go and do it? Calliope points out that she stood no chance against him "when he was jUst a brat who liked to tease me", much less now that he's an "exceptionally mUscUlar and invincible adUlt". She says she needs all the time she can get when to find her own weapon: herself. More accurately, another iteration of herself from a doomed timeline where she came to dominate.
2013: No update.
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Steam | Twitter
When's Vanilla getting proper emoji for the other quadrants already?
I dunno I guess to me "yer cute" isn't really something people say outside of a flirtatious context
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