Hello and welcome to the next evolution of professional wrestling. Here at Hunter's School for Gifted Indie Wrestlers we're working with the latest technology and an unlimited supply of wrist tape to produce the next generation of WWE Superstars. World traveled international stars of the independent circuits from around the world will find they fit right in here. Those of you from vague sports and modeling backgrounds will probably also be employed for nine...maybe even eleven months. Your professors will include Dusty Rhodes, Sara Del Rey, Billy Gunn, Norman Smiley and a few others who are required to tell you about themselves by law. They've helped refine some of our finest students.
When we first found this small hairy Canadian we were unsure if he would fit into the structure here. He's surprisingly violent but he also has an astounding ability to recover from injury. Also, did you know he's Syrian? Like for real. And people chant "Olé!" at him. The WWE Network needs international appeal and soon this guy's going to be on covers and lunchboxes and videogames and RAW segments that don't suck. Then we'll clone him like five times and each of them will be a little worse.
We didn't even really hire this dude. He just follows the other Canadian around attacking him. I don't even think they're enemies. They actually seem to enjoy
it. Anyway he cuts better promos than any of you division 1 athletes will ever dream about.
"The man gravity wasn't told about or something" as our RAW commentary team has dubbed him. This hobbit is actually our champion. He has the powers of super speed and a jumping ability that borderlines on flight.
Look, this is like the third most offensive thing we've done to the Irish.
I'm pretty sure this guy isn't even some kind of mutant. He just kicks things so hard they turn into jelly.
Together they form they form the Uncanny NXT-men.
We need more than good wrestlers and charismatic talkers and Mojo Rawley though. We need to be unpredictable. Internet marks are already predicting our every move.
Top 20 internet smarks:
1 The Geebs That Got Bigtimed 244 74.85%
2 David_T 238 73.01%
3 Big M Langstein 236 72.39%
4 SanderJK 232 71.17%
5 Assuran 230 70.55%
6 Nirya 226 69.33%
7 411Randle 224 68.71%
8 MyNameIsWalrus 223 68.40%
9 Schide 222 68.10%
10 The Betman 221 67.79%
11 CSStheGr8 220 67.48%
11 PwnanObrien 220 67.48%
13 zllehs 218 66.87%
14 Balefuego 217 66.56%
15 Radius 216 66.26%
15 slimelord 216 66.26%
17 Goose! 212 65.03%
17 Wirehead26 212 65.03%
19 Dogbone33 209 64.11%
20 Xehalus 208 63.80%
Once a month we get together and watch a bunch of New Japan Pro Wrestling.
This isn't really part of the tour or anything. I just-BULLET CLUB IS REAL! TOO SWEET ME BROS!
Oh and also the WWE owns and produces RAW and Smackdown and Pay Per View events like Wrestlemania and tonight's Night of Champions blahblahblah whatever.