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[Cards Against Humanity] Hydra Holiday Hangout Edition! DR. FLAMINGO WINS!

Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
edited January 2015 in Critical Failures
Previously on Cards...

@Dr. Flamingo - 5 Points!!!!
During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into Centaurs.
Three months in the hole.; kid-tested, mother-approved!
In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Becoming a blueberry for all eternity.
What's a girl's best friend? A zesty breakfast burrito.
Before 24-hour media coverage, all we had was Police brutality.
@MegaMek- 2 Points
That's right, I killed The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy. How, you ask? A Burmese Tiger Pit.
After months of practice with The profoundly handicapped, I think I'm finally ready forDick Cheney.
@theSquid- 1 Points
You haven't truly lived until you've experienced two midgets shitting into a bucket and the moist, demanding chasm of his mouth at the same time. at the same time.
@Elvenshae- 0 Points
@tapeslinger- 1 Points
Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only A balanced breakfast. and his wits.
@Sir Fabulous- 2 Points
Finally! A service that delivers Passive-aggressive Post-it notes right to your door.
In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with Living in a trashcan for the first time.

Round 1: That's right, I killed _____. How, you ask? _____

@Elvenshae is the judge.

Grunt's Ghosts on
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Posts

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited December 2014
    What killed the Christmas spirit faster then your Uncle Pat's war stories?

    That's right, I killed The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy. How, you ask? A Burmese Tiger Pit. Winner: MegaMek
    That's right, I killed Sexual tension How, you ask? Lockjaw. theSquid
    That's right, I killed Stalin. How, you ask? Half-assed foreplay. tapeslinger
    That's right, I killed Republicans. How, you ask? My machete. Dr. Flamingo
    That's right, I killed God. How, you ask? Arnold Schwarzenegger. Sir Fabulous

    What Yule Time Slayer will haunt you until New Years, @Elvenshae?


    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • ElvenshaeElvenshae Registered User regular
    Da-da-dee-da-dee-da-dadadaAAAAAAARGH.

    I love you, Pyotr, but it's time for a break.

    @Grunt's Ghosts

    omgbfz5lzi1s.png
    Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
    The Disappearance of Inigo Sharpe: Tomas à Dunsanin
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Quick Google search shows that @MegaMek is in the hospital tonight, suffering from a server mauling.

    Round 2: During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into _____.

    PM your cards to me while @MegaMek deals with his sudden fascination with Furries.

  • MegaMekMegaMek Is a girl, actually. Registered User regular
    It's actually way harder to herd a bunch of giant cats under a stage than one would think.

    My thoughts on Mother Nature? Hurt her every chance you get.
    Elvenshae
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited December 2014
    And I've got the scars to prove it.

    During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into Centaurs. Winner: Dr. Flamingo
    During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into Getting drunk on mouthwash. theSquid
    During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into The Boy Scouts of America. Elvenshae
    During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into The Chinese gymnastics team. Sir Fabulous
    During his midlife crisis, my dad got really into Hot cheese. tapeslinger

    What is scaring you for life @MegaMek that will require years with a great therapist to get rid of?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • MegaMekMegaMek Is a girl, actually. Registered User regular
    dRVYPJr.jpg

    "Y'see son, they're the best of both worlds."

    And I never saw my old man again.

    My thoughts on Mother Nature? Hurt her every chance you get.
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    And I thought it was bad my dad left mommy and me for the babysitter...

    @Dr. Flamingo is the judge because I couldn't put his name in the witty comment above.

    Round 3: Finally! A service that delivers _____ right to your door.


    Send me your anwsers while @Dr. Flamingo finds out that that ad on Craigslist doesn't deliver the kind of daddy he was looking for.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    @tapeslinger seems to still be waiting for her package.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited December 2014
    I'm sure none of these are legal to mail...

    Finally! A service that delivers Civilian casualties right to your door. tapeslinger
    Finally! A service that delivers Sexy pillow fights right to your door. theSquid
    Finally! A service that delivers Passive-aggressive Post-it notes right to your door. Winner: Sir Fabulous
    Finally! A service that delivers A squadron of moles wearing aviator goggles right to your door. MegaMek
    Finally! A service that delivers Natalie Portman right to your door. Elvenshae

    So what are you buying in bulk before the government shuts it down, @Dr. Flamingo?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
    ElvenshaeMegaMek
  • Dr. FlamingoDr. Flamingo 49 Gilded Disc Perceives the Sun Registered User regular
    I don't know how I lived before Passive Agressive Post-It Notes started being delivered to my door.

    Oh wait, I do know. Better. That's how I lived.

    tapeslinger
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    But @Sir Fabulous how will I know that the postal guys isn't... Going Postal?

    Round 4: Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only ____ and his wits.

    Let me know how Bear survives Cyber Monday while @Sir Fabulous drinks something that might have been pee at some point...

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    I think we lost @theSquid and @tapeslinger in the dark jungle.

  • tapeslingertapeslinger Space Unicorn Slush Ranger Social Justice Rebel ScumRegistered User regular
    I think I unbookmarked the thread somehow? Sorry about that. (we were traveling all day yesterday though)

  • theSquidtheSquid Sydney, AustraliaRegistered User regular
    Oh sorry, generally can't get away with posting until after work.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    It's ok. We sent a search party after you. Now where is that search party...

    Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only Smallpox blankets and his wits. Elvenshae
    Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only dick fingers and his wits. MegaMek
    Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only Sudden Poop Explosion Disease and his wits. Dr. Flamingo
    Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only A balanced breakfast. and his wits. Winner: tapeslinger
    Next season on Man vs. Wild, Bear Grylls must survive in the depths of the Amazon with only Amputees and his wits. theSquid

    What's going to send @Sir Fabulous screaming into the woods faster then the uncensored airing of Seth Rogen and James Franco's "Naked and Afraid" episode?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • Sir FabulousSir Fabulous Malevolent Squid God Registered User regular
    It's secretly my choice, not Flamingo's, correct?

    pickup-sig.php?name=Orthanc

    I won $200 playing mafia once.
    Check out the VODs here
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Yeah, I updated everything while messed up on Vapor Rub. The flu is awesome guys.

    MegaMekSir Fabulous
  • Sir FabulousSir Fabulous Malevolent Squid God Registered User regular
    Bear Grylls knows the importance of a Balanced Breakfast.

    Cereal and pee
    Pee oatmeal
    And a glass of pee to wash it all down

    pickup-sig.php?name=Orthanc

    I won $200 playing mafia once.
    Check out the VODs here
    tapeslingerElvenshae
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    And suddenly @tapeslinger is hungry!

    Round 5: ______; kid-tested, mother-approved!

    Send in your answers while Hasbro Games and @tapeslinger test out the new Man vs. Wild boardgame, which comes with live snakes and a bottle of purified urine.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    I would pray for the youth of American if they weren't all brain dead already.

    Three months in the hole.; kid-tested, mother-approved! Winner: Dr. Flamingo
    Wiping her butt; kid-tested, mother-approved! MegaMek
    Jerking off into a pool of children's tears; kid-tested, mother-approved! theSquid
    Maximal insertion; kid-tested, mother-approved! Elvenshae
    Taking a man's eyes and balls out and putting his eyes where his balls go and then his balls in the eye holes; kid-tested, mother-approved! Sir Fabulous

    What is the best way to revive those brain cells, @tapeslinger?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • tapeslingertapeslinger Space Unicorn Slush Ranger Social Justice Rebel ScumRegistered User regular
    Three months in the hole sounds like just about the right number of months

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    Yet it didn't work for @Dr. Flamingo because he's still playing this game.

    Round 6: You haven't truly lived until you've experienced ___________ and __________ at the same time.

    PM me two cards while @Dr. Flamingo blows his mind with jail and product testing.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    @theSquid is causing me to experience sadness and disappointment at the same time.

    Elvenshae
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    Double the pleasure, Double the Embarrassing Photo Opportunities!

    You haven't truly lived until you've experienced two midgets shitting into a bucket and the moist, demanding chasm of his mouth at the same time. at the same time. Winner: theSquid
    You haven't truly lived until you've experienced A nuanced critique and Mr. Clean, right behind you at the same time. MegaMek
    You haven't truly lived until you've experienced Fiery Poops and Scrotum Tickling at the same time. Sir Fabulous
    You haven't truly lived until you've experienced Elderly Japanese men and Stephen Hawking talking dirty at the same time. Elvenshae
    You haven't truly lived until you've experienced Weapons-grade plutonium and Half-assed foreplay at the same time. tapeslinger

    What should everyone try to say that they truly lived, @Dr. Flamingo?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • Dr. FlamingoDr. Flamingo 49 Gilded Disc Perceives the Sun Registered User regular
    Definitely the first one, Two midgets shitting into a bucket

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    If it exist, there is porn of it. I'm just not sure @theSquid wanted to be in that movie though.

    Round 7: In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure _______ for all eternity.

    PM me the worst way @theSquid is paying for putting that awful image in my head.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    It would seem @Dr. Flamingo is enjoying the heat too much in Hell...

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    And here I was to lead to believe it was all brimstone and hellfire.

    In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Becoming a blueberry for all eternity. Winner: Dr. Flamingo
    In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Muhammad (Praise Be Unto Him) for all eternity. Elvenshae
    In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Emotions for all eternity. Sir Fabulous
    In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Grandma for all eternity. MegaMek
    In the Seventh Circle of Hell, sinners must endure Doing the right thing for all eternity. tapeslinger

    What makes us wish we could just drop into the 8th level of Hell, @theSquid?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • theSquidtheSquid Sydney, AustraliaRegistered User regular
    I guess I'll go with becoming a blueberry.

    Elvenshae
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    I'm confused how being delicious is hell. Maybe @Dr. Flamingo can give us some insight.

    Round 8: In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with _____ for the first time.

    PM me your cards while Dr. Flamingo gets promoted to the Third Circle just to be twerked on by the Spawn of Satan herself.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    This is honestly my favorite Black Card in the game.

    In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with Living in a trashcan for the first time. Winner: Sir Fabulous.
    In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with making the penises kiss for the first time. theSquid
    In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with Blowing some dudes in an alley for the first time. MegaMek
    In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with Gandalf for the first time. tapeslinger
    In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with erectile dysfunction for the first time. Elvenshae

    Which direction is Disney taking the show, @Dr. Flamingo?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
    Elvenshae
  • Dr. FlamingoDr. Flamingo 49 Gilded Disc Perceives the Sun Registered User regular
    Having Hannah Montana living in a trash can was certainly an unprecedented turn for the show.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    Uh Oh, @Sir Fabulous rode that giant inflatable penis into homelessness.

    Round 9: What's a girl's best friend?

    Let me know as while Sir Fabulous looks, well, fabulous with a garbage bag dress and a popcorn pearl necklace in this year's newest fashion for the poor and broken.

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • Sir FabulousSir Fabulous Malevolent Squid God Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    The things I do for fashion.

    Edit: Also, the things I do for love.

    Sir Fabulous on
    pickup-sig.php?name=Orthanc

    I won $200 playing mafia once.
    Check out the VODs here
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    With Friends like these no wonder she dumped you.

    What's a girl's best friend? Natural Male Enhancement. tapeslinger
    What's a girl's best friend? Reverse cowgirl. MegaMek
    What's a girl's best friend? Jumping out at people. theSquid
    What's a girl's best friend? A zesty breakfast burrito. Winner: Dr. Flamingo
    What's a girl's best friend? The folly of men. ElvenShae

    So what bribes did you used to keep her from leaving you, @Sir Fabulous?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
  • Sir FabulousSir Fabulous Malevolent Squid God Registered User regular
    If she's not dating you because of your looks or because of your personality, it's probably because of your breakfast burritos.

    pickup-sig.php?name=Orthanc

    I won $200 playing mafia once.
    Check out the VODs here
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    More to the point, it's because of your smell, @Dr. Flamingo.

    Round 10: After months of practice with ________, I think I'm finally ready for _______.

    Send me your PMs while Dr. Flamingo masters the Art of Holding Your Breath.

  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    @MegaMek and @Sir Fabulous need more practice in giving me cards.

    Elvenshae
  • MegaMekMegaMek Is a girl, actually. Registered User regular
    It just took me a while to craft the perfect reply. You can't rush perfection, people.

    My thoughts on Mother Nature? Hurt her every chance you get.
  • Grunt's GhostsGrunt's Ghosts Registered User regular
    edited January 2015
    Prefect Practice makes Perfect. What you guys are doing...

    After months of practice with The gays, I think I'm finally ready for Gay aliens. Sir Fabulous
    After months of practice with The profoundly handicapped, I think I'm finally ready for Dick Cheney. Winner: MegaMek
    After months of practice with preteens, I think I'm finally ready for Fuck Mountain. theSquid
    After months of practice with Intimacy problems, I think I'm finally ready for 72 virgins. tapeslinger
    After months of practice with a lamprey swimming up the toilet and latching onto your taint, I think I'm finally ready for the violation of our most basic human rights. Elvenshae

    What's your Goal of Perfection, @Dr. Flamingo?

    Grunt's Ghosts on
    MegaMekElvenshae
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