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Times you did Goofy
Butler
89 episodes or bustRegistered User regular
89 episodes or bustRegistered User regular
I am currently working on the gajillionth rewrite of my Master's thesis which was due over a month ago. One of my supervisors has actually refused to provide any further feedback because he is tired of looking at it and has better things to do with his time (paraphrasing here, but only just). I am still wrapping my head around the chain reactions of fuck ups that has lead to this point, but never mind that. What I really need right now, more than encouragement, is to read stories of other people screwing the pooch. Don't tell me I'm not a fountain of disappointment, tell me I'm not alone in being a fountain of disappointment.
Bogey on
+13
Posts
This will be here until I receive an apology or Weedlordvegeta get any consequences for being a bully
The other day I missed a major exam for a class and lied about having jury duty in order to get a chance to retake it. I eventually was able to retake it but not because of the jury duty thing because apparently juries are not selected at around midnight on a Saturday.
Yesterday I responded to an email from a client (functionally my boss at the moment) about how I spending too long on individual work projects and he was thinking about hiring other people and cutting my hours exactly ten days after he sent said email to me
Around a year and a half ago I farted while naked and accidentally shat on my SO's floor in front of her.
Feel better yet?
Yeah actually I feel way better. Thanks for this man.
This will be here until I receive an apology or Weedlordvegeta get any consequences for being a bully
Strangely, yes. Empathising pretty hard with the first two, though single life has spared me the third one.
And I fucking dropped out of the community college that was paid for with that $3k. Not because I couldn't hack it--I actually was doing quite well--but because I was too busy driving nearly an hour away every day to bang my ex-girlfriend in between her classes while SHE went to college. The ex who literally caused me to have a nervous breakdown the year prior. The one who was as toxic for me as you read about. Getting my dick wet was more important to me than school.
I regret that every single day of my life, actually.
now I am writing up four whole statistical analyses that are due to my prof at 11 am!
Everyone gets one get-out-of-jail-free on caring way too much about fucking.
Turns out she overdosed on heroin. So, always remember, Butler, at least your irresponsibility didn't kill or endanger anyone.
No seriously, there's been a lot of painful fuckups I've made in my life. I've lost a lot of people I really admired through sheer ineptitude.
2DS/3DS Friend code 0361-7385-2366
Twitter: @PoeticGecko
Bro
Though if I'm reading that right, neither did yours? How did you feel when you finally found out it wasn't your fault?
You're probably a very good mechanic, though. Especially at diagnosing faults and failures.
Yes, I am that idiot who gets too attached to a girl when it's clearly not going to happen.
Pro tip kids, chill the fuck out.
Oh and there was that time I told an engineer to pull a cable out and it took a middle-eastern stock exchange offline.
Another pro-tip, always have it in writing from your customer if they want to yank a cable and ignore proper change control
A time that I done goofed that turned out bad (bummer warning):
I dropped out of school a few weeks later and never went back! I consider that entire 8-month span as a big done goof.
Further goofs I almost forgot:
A few years later, I'm still hooked on this girl, and we become close again as I'm getting ready to go to Iraq. Just before I leave, she gets super upset and that takes away all the rest of my resolve, and while deployed I call her constantly. During that summer I go home on leave which happens to coincide with my 21st birthday. She organizes all the festivities, and we end up hooking up and "getting back together". I blow about $5000 taking her to New York, putting us up in a super nice hotel, buying us Broadway tickets, Yankees box seats, the whole nine. I go back to Iraq at the end of the two weeks, we keep talking frequently...and then less frequently...and then less frequently. I fly home in December, call her when I land in Maine, literally as soon as I could get a cell phone activated, and she doesn't even answer the phone. I end up having a conversation with her through her dad who tells me she's too busy.
I go to their house for Christmas because they invited me and my parents had just moved away, and the whole trip is super awkward. A few weeks later is her birthday and we're barely speaking at this point, but I decide to keep the monetized affection train rolling and I buy her a nice TV, though when I go to her party she won't even talk to me (except for the drunken makeout sesh we had on the couch before I passed out). And then that was the last time we saw each other until a friend's funeral a few years ago!
And that's when I learned that I actively despise all forms of children.
I haven't even asked anyone about my master's thesis and I'm supposed to graduate next semester!
Make your supervisors work out a completion timeline with you ASAP. You are also going to want to have a complete first draft at least a month before deadline because good lord will there be rewrites.
EDIT: Not saying you need to panic, just saying do this stuff very soon and you can avoid a lot of panic.
Honestly I had been beating myself up about it silently for so long that when I finally broke down and told my mom about it, she was like, "Oh my God that? That wasn't your fault, she ODed." I suddenly felt like I was no longer drowning. I was, I think, 19 or 20 when I found out, but the incident happened when I was 13. So the reason I never found out what really happened to her was because my mom was... I dunno, avoiding adult subjects like drugs or death or whatever? She felt really bad about lying to me, so it was kind of a learning experience for the both of us.
I was very nervous, not having had much romantic success at that stage in my life to that point so when my helicopter mother got even more controlling of the situation than usual I kinda just let her handle it. She helped me get my tux and corsage ready while a friend of mine was handling the limousine we would all split.
I picked up the clothes and flowers and got ready, then picked up my fate. We took photos outside her very nice house and things seemed great until I arrived at my friend's house to get catch the limo. That's when his pity-stricken mother informed us that I had the wrong night. Prom was the next day. My mother had planned everything for the day before the actual event and not realized it and I never caught that detail because I was so anxious.
She'd had her hair done for the occasion and had a gorgeous dress and I had a rented tux that I was going to have to beg an extra day out of. She still went with me, though I'm sure she was wondering how I fucked the day of the prom up.
The next night I think I played nothing but the Cowboy Bebop soundtrack on the ride and talked to my very gracious date about animé.
I hope I never ever have a story that makes me more embarrassed to tell than this.
Goddamn, this one killed me with second-hand embarrassment.
That's the kind of thing that can happen when you let your mom keikaku your prom for you
Steam ID - VeldrinD
In third grade, every day our math teacher would write a problem on each homeroom board that you had to solve by the time you had your math class. I'm really good at math, so they were usually very easy, but math was my last class of the day so sometimes I wouldn't do them in the morning and had to catch up later.
I also frequently that year stayed inside during recess with a friend to play Where in the World is Carmen San Diego? on the library computers.
So one day I had not done the math problem, we were playing the game and caught up in it, but as recess was coming to a close I realized I a) still had to do the math problem and b) had to pee really badly.
So I go to my homeroom, start working on the problem, and either the tenseness of the situation was getting to me or (I swear!) it was the hardest problem all year, but I was struggling. Trying to solve it while shifting foot to foot. It gets worse as I hear my classmates starting to come back from recess.
Finally, the class clown type, a sort-of friend of mine who tended to run through the hallways, is the first to return from recess and bursts into the room. This is so startling to me I lose control of my bladder, and stand there in a horrified stupour, staring at him as urine streams down my legs.
He stops, seeing something is clearly wrong, and then the expression on his face as he figured it out haunts me. He looks down, back up at my face, then turns around running back the way he came shouting at the top of his lungs, "[my surname] PISSED HIS PANTS!" I could literally hear him from the floor below.
So now literally every kid in my grade begins crowding inside the doorway to look at me, forming a semi-circle around me, all staring and nobody saying a word. Like 40 kids. It's like I'm an animal at the zoo.
After .. I have no idea how long of this silence, I can't take it anymore and drop my gaze. And then, in my infinite wisdom, I decide the silence is too painful and I must break it.
The only comment I could think to utter was to remark upon the unique shape the urine had formed a stain in the carpet. I said - and imagine this in a tiny, broken eight-year-old voice - "It's a whale."
Everyone laughed uproariously, and I was mortified for life. And I still have friends, almost 20 years later, who remember.
Steam: Chagrin LoL: Bonhomie
That doesn't sound like keikaku, more like keikamikaze.
Most of them aren't fun, haha! Type stories. Just despair and depression.
But out of all that I've built a family, I have a good job, I own my home. I don't feel depressed all of the time now.
I always say when my my wife and I got out first place we had a 13" TV and an air mattress in the living room. 8 years later we have 3 kids and a very nice home.
So no matter how low you get, you can always pick yourself back up.
Close it up. We're done here.