Crazy Animal Sex Practices

mully

Okay so apparently this should be a thread. Damned if I'd know.

Question came up - what animal would you compare to yourself to in terms of sexual relations?

Also ... discuss crazy animal mating rituals here.
Because man, animals are freaky.

Also, here's a link to help you figure yourself out, or something.
I don't know, it's from Quetzi.
http://www.thesite.org/magazine/sex_and_relationships/animalquiz.html

Filler Inc.

Aparently Im a koala in the sack.

Cuddly and snuggly. You love romance and being pampered by a partner. Candle-lit dinners, red roses and soft, moody music all set the perfect tone for you. In bed you're very sensual and eager to give your partner as much as they give you. You love sex but it isn't a major priority in your relationships. You're at your happiest being cradled in your partner's arms.

DrIanMalcolm

QUETZI SAID HE'D DO IT MULLY GOD

mully

Love this:

"Just about everyone has heard that the female praying mantis eats the head of its mate after sex. But were you aware that often the female mantis will consume its mate's head during sex? Shockingly, this doesn't deter the male from finishing what he's begun. That's right. If the male mantis has mounted the female before she begins to devour his head, he will successfully complete copulation without it. Most women have always suspected this would be the case with their human counterparts as well."

mully

HEY I'M THE ONE WHO BROUGHT UP THE DISCUSSION OKAY GOD

DrIanMalcolm

WHERE ARE YOU FINDING THIS INFORMATION

QuestionMarkMan

Quetzi wrote: »

YOURS DOESN'T EVEN HAVE THE LINK JESUS CHRIST!

CG Faggotry

Is this an attempt to expose the furries in our midst?

iusehappymod

I was Rhymnocerous, but I think I'm going to switch to a bacterium, due to my odd habit of asexual reproduction.

mully

"certain insects have been known to have coitus for up to an unbelievable 60 hours. It appears a standing ovation may be in order. Unfortunately, that admirable length of time is not completely voluntary on the part of the participants. It seems this duration is due, in part, to the fact that insect penises (as well as the organs of some reptiles) lock within the female, making withdrawal difficult. Sometimes withdrawal isn't possible at all, and the penis breaks off. This gives an entirely new meaning to the term "one night stand."

MINE DIDN'T NEED A LINK
fine ill add the goddamn link

Abracadaniel

I'm a rock

No Great Name

What "What type of furry are you?" bullshit in disguise is this?

Berk

Abracadaniel

berk let us mate

mully

Oh man, that quiz just called me a Slug.

But I think it's inaccurate because "play DS" didn't come up as a choice for activities thereafter.
...
That might make me more of a slug. Oh crap.


Berk, you glorious bastard.

Berk

Smart Hero wrote: »

berk let us mate

I've been so patient!

TheySlashThem

Berk wrote: »

what the hell is that thing

As7

Berk you've got a little something on your chin.

Abracadaniel

mully wrote: »

Oh man, that quiz just called me a Slug.

But I think it's inaccurate because "play DS" didn't come up as a choice for activities thereafter.
...
That might make me more of a slug. Oh crap.


Berk, you glorious bastard.

ahahaha
me too

hi5

mully

Oh god. I think Tubgirl was meant for horny hippos:


4. Hippos- Taking care of business
Homemade aromatherapy? Hippos attract mates by marking territory - urinating and defecating simultaneously. Then, states canongate.net, the hippo twirls its tail like a propeller, spreading his mess everywhere - irresistible to the opposite sex. Once a mate is found, the pair begin foreplay, consisting splashing around in the water (perhaps to clean up). So next time your sweetie knocks on the door while you are dropping some deuces, he she may not be bothering you; rather, they could be turned on.

TheySlashThem

oh shit

appearantly I am also a koala

Fedora

Smart Hero wrote: »

mully wrote: »

Oh man, that quiz just called me a Slug.

But I think it's inaccurate because "play DS" didn't come up as a choice for activities thereafter.
...
That might make me more of a slug. Oh crap.


Berk, you glorious bastard.

ahahaha
me too

hi5

Oh man, Me three.

Fuck that quiz!

All diss'in my game, fuck you online questionare about my sexuality, fuck you.

mully

Wasn't this a movie?

8. Homosexuality? That’s for the birds!
Canongate.net says male geese like male geese. However, during mating season a female will waddle her way between two courting males. They’ll let her in, fertilize her and carry on with their act. Both males visit the little goslings.

Abracadaniel

i guess not trying to fuck your friends boyfriend/girlfriends makes you boring

Wrench N Rockets

ThatDudeOverThere wrote: »

oh shit

appearantly I am also a koala

Hi5 my furry brother

As7

I am.....A MONKEY!

RANEADOS LET'S DO IT!

TheySlashThem

Should I bother reposting the bedbug thing in this thread y/n

BigDes

Fuck. I'm a koala.

Quetzi

ThatDudeOverThere wrote: »

Should I bother reposting the bedbug thing in this thread y/n

Repost it in the other one, that one's better.

TheySlashThem

repostin'

ThatDudeOverThere wrote: »

Man you wanna know about freaky animal sex

Try bedbugs

The male impales the female with his wang and ejaculates right into her fucking spine

mully

The bedbug thing is interesting, post post !

As7

OCTOPUS: The male octopus is easy to distinguish from the female – one of his tentacles has no suckers near the end. He mates by inserting this tentacle into the female’s mantle cavity. A sperm package is propelled down a tentacle groove into the female’s oviduct, where the sperm fertilize her eggs. The male octopus dies soon after mating. The female may produce up to 100,000 eggs, which she strings up on the ceiling of her lair. She watches over the eggs for six months, never leaving the nursery or eating. Each egg hatches into a tiny octopus only a quarter of an inch long, which immediately swims off to join the plankton. It settles on the seabed and begins to grow at an amazing rate – from a weight of half an ounce to two pounds or more within seven months. Meanwhile the mother has died, exhausted by the effort of breeding and starved by the six-month vigil she kept over her eggs.

DrIanMalcolm

TheySlashThem

I actually learned that handy tidbit from playing You Don't Know Jack a few years back

I think the category was "Really Gross Things You Didn't Want To Know"

Randall_Flagg

what? how did I get koala?

As7

Platypus: After mating with a male platypus, (between June and October) a female lays one or two eggs. She lies curled up with the eggs between her body and tail to protect them until they hatch. The eggs hatch in about ten days and the young stay with their mother for up to four months. They drink milk that oozes from their mother's body, sucking it from her fur.

mully

"In September, scientists from the Institute of Marine Research in Vigo, Spain, described, for likely the first time, the probable mating ritual of giant squid (which are typically 50 feet long, with eight legs and two tentacles, living in the blackness of the ocean a mile down). Based on examining five squid stranded on a beach in Spain, they posited that the larger female could rather easily resist the male, whose 8-foot-long, hypodermic needle-like penis is wielded so clumsily that he could mistakenly inseminate another passing male, or his own tentacle. [The Independent (London), 10-2-05]"

TheySlashThem

that is glorious

Berk

Arsenic7 wrote: »

Berk you've got a little something on your chin.

is it penis?

is it your penis?

Abracadaniel

Berk wrote: »

Arsenic7 wrote: »

Berk you've got a little something on your chin.

is it penis?

is it your penis?

you hussy

TheySlashThem

berk I am serious what the fuck is that blob thing