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aging

crwthcrwth THAT'S ITRegistered User regular
we’re all getting older. a lot of us posted here in our mid to late teens and now we’re lookin at the top of the hill

my dad is getting older. his balance has been fucked for years but now it’s getting worse. he keeps having falls. too stubborn to do anything about it…can’t live with me. would rather jump off a cliff than be sent to a home. my mom had a massive heart attack a couple years ago. she’s ok now but it fucked up her left hand

how do we grapple with getting older? with our loves ones getting older? the day will come someday, and i’ve never been totally comfortable with it

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Posts

  • CoinageCoinage Heaviside LayerRegistered User regular
    Denial until darkness takes me

    Happiness is within reach!
  • TuminTumin Registered User regular
    35,000 days, at best, to figure out how to do a backflip

  • reVersereVerse Attack and Dethrone God Registered User regular
    I still have nightmares about being late to class or having forgot my homework.

  • Undead ScottsmanUndead Scottsman Cybertronian Paranormal Eliminator Registered User regular
    I plan on the world ending before I get too much older, so I don't think about it other than complaining about my body falling apart to my friends and coworkers.

  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    edited June 3
    I plan to live until April the 20th 2056

    Uriel on
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    I can feel the wisdom accruing in my arteries.

    The foolish elasticity and firmness of youth being replaced by the enlightened sag and billow of the years.

  • EchoEcho ski-bap ba-dapModerator, Administrator admin
    reVerse wrote: »
    I still have nightmares about being late to class or having forgot my homework.

    One of my somewhat frequently recurring dream scenarios is being back in school, and skipping math class specifically.

    I never skipped math class.

    And last week I dreamed about overdue library books.

    Brain, stop it.

  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    I don't have many school dreams but then

    I barely went

    But yeah I'm not a fan of getting older. It sucks to get sick or watch my friends get sick.

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer Scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratchRegistered User regular
    I can feel myself aging as I wait for you to go to the store

  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    Unironically I accept the finite life I have and the inevitability of the death of those I love. Live in the moment and hold ‘em close until the curtain drops. I also find trying to reverse the damage corpos have done to the environment is helping me immensely. Just do what you can, but also sometimes say fuck it, put ice cream in your whiskey, play some good tracks and do nothing. Everything in moderation, even moderation.

    Also: Commit crimes against your government, speak out, protest, slit the tires of fascists this is a joke post it cannot be used in a court of law.

  • HeadCreepsHeadCreeps NOW IS THE TIME FOR DRINKING! Registered User regular
    reVerse wrote: »
    I still have nightmares about being late to class or having forgot my homework.

    And I'm not wearing pants :worried:

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  • Kane Red RobeKane Red Robe Master of Magic ArcanusRegistered User regular
    I was pretty sure I was dying before 2005 so pretty much everything that's gone on afterwards is a kind of novel gift to myself.

  • Garlic BreadGarlic Bread i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a bitch i'm a Registered User, Disagreeable regular
    Unironically I accept the finite life I have and the inevitability of the death of those I love. Live in the moment and hold ‘em close until the curtain drops. I also find trying to reverse the damage corpos have done to the environment is helping me immensely. Just do what you can, but also sometimes say fuck it, put ice cream in your whiskey, play some good tracks and do nothing. Everything in moderation, even moderation.

    Also: Commit crimes against your government, speak out, protest, slit the tires of fascists this is a joke post it cannot be used in a court of law.

    yeah, all of this + take transgender hormones is pretty much what i was gonna say

  • crwthcrwth THAT'S IT Registered User regular
    I can feel myself aging as I wait for you to go to the store

    did you feel like continuing this bit in a thread where i’m trying to grapple with the inevitability of my parents death and in turn my own in the future, leaving my son to experience the same dread was cool and good to do

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  • PoorochondriacPoorochondriac Ah, man Ah, jeezRegistered User regular
    My family has often had a very matter-of-fact relationship with death. Both sides of my family have passionate geneaologists, which meant a lot of childhood trips to graveyards. I had an aunt who purchased her own coffin because it was on sale and she'd "need it some day," who proceeded to use it as a coffee table for years.

    In my 20s I lived recklessly and self-destructively; I was pretty sure I was gonna die at 27, be part of the 27 club. I had not made any art that anybody cared about (nor should have). This did little to dissuade me of my romantic certainty. "No point REALLY trying, I'm almost out of here." And then I kept going, which annoyed me at the time. Felt like I had fucked up, or something. Blew my shot.

    And then my 30s have been the best years of my life, by a lot. Started actually making art instead of just fantasizing about Being An Artist. Got married. Got my dream career. Got a kid.

    Somewhere in there, folks in my life started dying. My wife's father, my grandparents, more relatives, more friends. A few years of getting walloped by grief every six months, every five. And each of those people has missed something amazing - there are a lot of folks that I wish could've met my daughter.

    Which doesn't make me despair, but rather makes me cheesily, cornily grateful to age. "Every extra year I get is more opportunity to find something special, something I want to share, something someone I loved would have loved." Imagining how they'd have reacted, imagining them happy with me, bringing them forward with me.

    If the pricetag for meeting my daughter is that my knee clicks when I get up from sitting on the floor with her, well, that kind of makes me love the clicking.

    Here is a poem that makes me cry.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EBWcnGjfadY

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer Scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratch scritch scratchRegistered User regular
    crwth wrote: »
    I can feel myself aging as I wait for you to go to the store

    did you feel like continuing this bit in a thread where i’m trying to grapple with the inevitability of my parents death and in turn my own in the future, leaving my son to experience the same dread was cool and good to do

    I will admit

    I woke up, saw the thread title, and hit reply without reading the op

    I apologize

  • KadithKadith Registered User regular
    trying to balance setting things up so we can be generally self sufficient and comfortable once we get even older but also being present and taking care of the important stuff happening now

    i thought i'd be able to lean on my mom more considering my dad passed a few years ago (thx cancer) but she's spending the majority of her time with her new bf in illinois so our family unit is truly becoming an island

    doing my best not to ignore my body when something hurts or i can't do something like i used to

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  • PinfeldorfPinfeldorf Yeah ZestRegistered User regular
    The worst thing I'm finding about getting older is just grappling with my memory getting worse. I seem to forget words a lot more. Did I move the laundry into the dryer? How could I run out of eggs?

    It's very annoying.

  • ShadowfireShadowfire Vermont, in the middle of nowhereRegistered User regular
    reVerse wrote: »
    I still have nightmares about being late to class or having forgot my homework.

    I have bad dreams about previous jobs. Being stuck there while customers keep coming in on Christmas Eve or whatever and "we're not allowed to tell them to leave" so I end up working straight through Christmas Day.

  • GustavGustav Friend of Goats Somewhere in the OzarksRegistered User regular
    Had a nightmare spell of taking care of someone after what should have been a couple of routine (if difficult) surgeries that went super poorly because recovery was ignored in some very destructive ways. And well that went poorly. Probably the worst little spell of my life in fact!

    The loss of independence is terrifying and I can empathise with wanting to fight against a sudden shift in your normality. But from the caregiver perspective it completely rewired my brain on mortality and how taking care of your own health is probably more important to those around you than sometimes yourself.

    Dunno rough stuff. I don’t particularly have any issues with my own aging, but boy family members are another thing.

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  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    Can someone hook a fella up with a back massage? This thing is killing me

  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    I think I got a pinched nerve around my shoulder or neck and it blows ass

  • FlarneFlarne Registered User regular
    I refuse to grow old. Hoping for de-aging treatments becoming a thing in my lifetime. Or put me in a robot body, whatever.

  • LabelLabel Registered User regular
    I have spent the last week in and out of the hospital, being the caretaker of my dad. He is seemed to have a mental episode, and we are now doing the early stages of figuring out how to take care of things if he's no longer capable.

    This whole time, I am nearly forty with fast-dwindling hope for ever having relationships of my own, and the question that will not leave the back of my mind is "Who is going to do this stuff for me, when I am his age?"


    it has been...

    grand

  • ThawmusThawmus +Jackface Registered User regular
    Lately it seems that with all of my coworkers being boomers and some of my friends being boomers and a lot of my family being boomers, I'm seeing a lot of death these days.

    Plus a lot of landmarks and favorite restaurants and such keep getting torn down and replaced with another clothing store. Here's a neat bowling alley, tear that fucker down, we need another clothing store! Here's a skate park, tear that fucker down, now it's a parking lot.

    There was an old, old brick building downtown that was the post office. They tore it down and turned it into a parking lot. Nevermind that it's fucking ancient and has historical value

    Stuff like that bothers me. It changes the landscape emotionally as well as physically, because I just recognize the world around me less and less as a result. I think I finally understand all the old fuckers and why they cling to everything.

    I used to go to the downtown bookstore 7 nights a week to play board games and TTRPG's. I'd stop at the bar next door to get food and I'd be surrounded by some of the best people I've ever met in my life. Now they're dead or moved away or they got hitched to someone who doesn't want them playing games.

    I want that life back more than anything but it's gone now.

    Now when I do anything I can just feel the sand emptying out.

    Twitch: Thawmus83
  • GR_ZombieGR_Zombie Krillin It Registered User regular
    Watching my hometown get colonized and cannabalized by Los Angeles has been making me increasingly angry.

  • QuetziQuetzi Here we may reign secure, and in my choice, To reign is worth ambition though in HellRegistered User, Moderator mod
    I've got a painting in my closet to take care of it for me

  • Endless_SerpentsEndless_Serpents Registered User regular
    I always think of Kate Tempest when I think about stuff like this.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iK0iKu5KqQ

  • JasconiusJasconius sword criminal mad onlineRegistered User regular
    i can handle the gray hair (actually, in my case, pure white)... but the one thing about getting older that really bothers me is going for words and not finding them..... can't dye your brain!

    this is a discord of mostly PA people interested in fighting games: https://discord.gg/DZWa97d5rz

    we also talk about other random shit and clown upon each other
  • BahamutZEROBahamutZERO Registered User regular
    I can't tell if my memory or ability to find words is getting worse because it's always been shit

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  • P10P10 An Idiot With Low IQ Registered User regular
    my dad is doing terribly since retiring. he's always been an alcoholic but without work he has no reason to try to keep it in check. i think he's majorly depressed but that might be my projecting - he does nothing all day except watch stupid youtube videos and play some terrible mobile game. the mobile game i've come to partially understand because he's in some clan and using discord so its probably the only thing going on for him that gives him some sense of social connection. the youtube stuff seems to be mostly politics - he's a democrat so it's not the 'normal' old person brain poison but i assume it's either depressing trump doomsaying or vitriolic anger, neither of which seem good. but yeah with nothing he wants to do all day he just drinks and gets falling down drunk by noon, and speaking of he's fallen down a couple of times at this point.

    don't really know what to do to help him. he tried therapy and naltrexone in the past which i think just gives him a belief that nothing would work in present

    Shameful pursuits and utterly stupid opinions
  • amateurhouramateurhour One day I'll be professionalhour The woods somewhere in TennesseeRegistered User regular
    I've decided my 40-50 years (soon to be 41) are my whimsy years.

    I've learned some sleight of hand magic and a couple of card tricks, and I'm making cigar box guitars.

    Aging has been great for me.

    are YOU on the beer list?
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    actually i am getting younger

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  • UrielUriel Registered User regular
    actually i am getting younger

    When will you become a baby do you think?

    What happens after that?

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    I’m going to start aging backwards now that I’m 43. In 30 years I’ll be back in diapers!

  • HacksawHacksaw J. Duggan Esq. Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    reVerse wrote: »
    I still have nightmares about being late to class or having forgot my homework.

    Same. It feels genuinely like some sort of psychic betrayal to be having these dreams still into my 30s. I haven't been in school almost longer than I haven't been in school! This shit needs to stop!

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    Straightzi wrote: »
    I've got a painting in my closet to take care of it for me

    of all the people on this forum, you probably are the most likely Dorian Gray candidate here, maybe with Zonugal in the running

  • Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    Straightzi wrote: »
    I've got a painting in my closet to take care of it for me

    of all the people on this forum, you probably are the most likely Dorian Gray candidate here, maybe with Zonugal in the running

    No way. 100% Straightzi.

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