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aging
crwth
THAT'S ITRegistered User regular
THAT'S ITRegistered User regular
we’re all getting older. a lot of us posted here in our mid to late teens and now we’re lookin at the top of the hill
my dad is getting older. his balance has been fucked for years but now it’s getting worse. he keeps having falls. too stubborn to do anything about it…can’t live with me. would rather jump off a cliff than be sent to a home. my mom had a massive heart attack a couple years ago. she’s ok now but it fucked up her left hand
how do we grapple with getting older? with our loves ones getting older? the day will come someday, and i’ve never been totally comfortable with it
my dad is getting older. his balance has been fucked for years but now it’s getting worse. he keeps having falls. too stubborn to do anything about it…can’t live with me. would rather jump off a cliff than be sent to a home. my mom had a massive heart attack a couple years ago. she’s ok now but it fucked up her left hand
how do we grapple with getting older? with our loves ones getting older? the day will come someday, and i’ve never been totally comfortable with it
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The foolish elasticity and firmness of youth being replaced by the enlightened sag and billow of the years.
One of my somewhat frequently recurring dream scenarios is being back in school, and skipping math class specifically.
I never skipped math class.
And last week I dreamed about overdue library books.
Brain, stop it.
I barely went
But yeah I'm not a fan of getting older. It sucks to get sick or watch my friends get sick.
http://www.audioentropy.com/
Also: Commit crimes against your government, speak out, protest, slit the tires of fascists this is a joke post it cannot be used in a court of law.
And I'm not wearing pants
yeah, all of this + take transgender hormones is pretty much what i was gonna say
did you feel like continuing this bit in a thread where i’m trying to grapple with the inevitability of my parents death and in turn my own in the future, leaving my son to experience the same dread was cool and good to do
In my 20s I lived recklessly and self-destructively; I was pretty sure I was gonna die at 27, be part of the 27 club. I had not made any art that anybody cared about (nor should have). This did little to dissuade me of my romantic certainty. "No point REALLY trying, I'm almost out of here." And then I kept going, which annoyed me at the time. Felt like I had fucked up, or something. Blew my shot.
And then my 30s have been the best years of my life, by a lot. Started actually making art instead of just fantasizing about Being An Artist. Got married. Got my dream career. Got a kid.
Somewhere in there, folks in my life started dying. My wife's father, my grandparents, more relatives, more friends. A few years of getting walloped by grief every six months, every five. And each of those people has missed something amazing - there are a lot of folks that I wish could've met my daughter.
Which doesn't make me despair, but rather makes me cheesily, cornily grateful to age. "Every extra year I get is more opportunity to find something special, something I want to share, something someone I loved would have loved." Imagining how they'd have reacted, imagining them happy with me, bringing them forward with me.
If the pricetag for meeting my daughter is that my knee clicks when I get up from sitting on the floor with her, well, that kind of makes me love the clicking.
Here is a poem that makes me cry.
I will admit
I woke up, saw the thread title, and hit reply without reading the op
I apologize
http://www.audioentropy.com/
i thought i'd be able to lean on my mom more considering my dad passed a few years ago (thx cancer) but she's spending the majority of her time with her new bf in illinois so our family unit is truly becoming an island
doing my best not to ignore my body when something hurts or i can't do something like i used to
It's very annoying.
I have bad dreams about previous jobs. Being stuck there while customers keep coming in on Christmas Eve or whatever and "we're not allowed to tell them to leave" so I end up working straight through Christmas Day.
https://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561197970666737/
The loss of independence is terrifying and I can empathise with wanting to fight against a sudden shift in your normality. But from the caregiver perspective it completely rewired my brain on mortality and how taking care of your own health is probably more important to those around you than sometimes yourself.
Dunno rough stuff. I don’t particularly have any issues with my own aging, but boy family members are another thing.
Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
This whole time, I am nearly forty with fast-dwindling hope for ever having relationships of my own, and the question that will not leave the back of my mind is "Who is going to do this stuff for me, when I am his age?"
it has been...
grand
Plus a lot of landmarks and favorite restaurants and such keep getting torn down and replaced with another clothing store. Here's a neat bowling alley, tear that fucker down, we need another clothing store! Here's a skate park, tear that fucker down, now it's a parking lot.
There was an old, old brick building downtown that was the post office. They tore it down and turned it into a parking lot. Nevermind that it's fucking ancient and has historical value
Stuff like that bothers me. It changes the landscape emotionally as well as physically, because I just recognize the world around me less and less as a result. I think I finally understand all the old fuckers and why they cling to everything.
I used to go to the downtown bookstore 7 nights a week to play board games and TTRPG's. I'd stop at the bar next door to get food and I'd be surrounded by some of the best people I've ever met in my life. Now they're dead or moved away or they got hitched to someone who doesn't want them playing games.
I want that life back more than anything but it's gone now.
Now when I do anything I can just feel the sand emptying out.
we also talk about other random shit and clown upon each other
don't really know what to do to help him. he tried therapy and naltrexone in the past which i think just gives him a belief that nothing would work in present
I've learned some sleight of hand magic and a couple of card tricks, and I'm making cigar box guitars.
Aging has been great for me.
When will you become a baby do you think?
What happens after that?
Same. It feels genuinely like some sort of psychic betrayal to be having these dreams still into my 30s. I haven't been in school almost longer than I haven't been in school! This shit needs to stop!
of all the people on this forum, you probably are the most likely Dorian Gray candidate here, maybe with Zonugal in the running
No way. 100% Straightzi.